Questioning Me
Do feel free to ask me anything you like. I am here for you to dip into my mind and for you to benefit from learning how I view the world. No question is off limits and if you want to establish a dialogue with me, then so much the better. You will be helping me so I can show the treatment team that I am interacting with people in this setting. You can ask me why I do certain things, what am I thinking, what my favourite food is, whatever you like. This is your chance to extract as much knowledge and information from me as you possibly can. If you want to just make a statement, go ahead. Fill your boots. I don’t know you so I won’t fly into a rage (this does happen when people I know question me but that is because they have an agenda – you don’t because we don’t know one another). I look forward to hearing from you.
13,011 thoughts on “Questioning Me”
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Hello HG,
If a psychopath is born, not created. Can this gene be passed on to the unborn child? And if so, do you know who could also have this gene in your family? I haven’t heard or read you mention this before.
It can yes.
There are two family members who this would apply to.
Great question, Charly!
Mr. Tudor says, “There are two family members who this would apply to.” I’m intrigued. Will you consider telling us which two of your family members also have the ASPD gene?
I will.
Leigh: Will you consider telling us which two of your family members also have the ASPD gene?
HG: I will.
Looking forward to it, sir.
Dear HG,
I’m looking forward to learning more about the other 2 family members. I think I know of one already, from your Knowing HG Series. Xx
Mr. Tudor,
I’m in a group with several people and there’s one person who will ignore and withdraw from people but I haven’t seen heated fury. Is it possible that an MMR A or B would be more likely to use cold fury instead of heated fury on tertiary or secondary sources if other sources could see what was happening and they needed to maintain their facade? Thank you for your time.
Yes, that is correct Leigh.
Mr. Tudor,
Regarding President Macron, I’m assuming that there was a corrective devaluation issued to his wife. Can you give us some examples of what those corrective devaluations might be? I was immediately concerned for her when I saw that video. I’m curious what you think might happened once they were alone.
Most likely it will have been a particular stare which meant “I will deal with you later” and he will have done so away from the world’s cameras.
Thankyou for your reply, Mr. Tudor. If I may, I have a follow up question.
Aside from the stare that says, “I will deal with you later”, would there be any other corrective devaluations or would it stop there? When they were away from the world’s cameras, would there be further consequences for her betrayal?
The corrective devaluations would take place later as I explained in my original answer.
Mr. Tudor, I apologize that I wasn’t clear in my question. If I may clarify. I was curious what you thought President Macron’s corrective devaluations would actually be once they were behind closed doors. Would there be some sort of physical assault?
Potentially physical but I doubt it, far more likely to be verbal insult and triangulation followed by silent treatment.
Thank you for you response, Mr. Tudor.
You’re welcome.
Hello Mr Tudor.
Are you aware of the recently released book Becoming Brigitte on the Macrons ? Hot stuff written by an excellent journalist about The Secret that many French people have discovered, some as soon as they saw”Brigitte” walking, others with Candace Owen’s series kn YT.
Thank you.
I am aware of the book, I have not read it.
I hope you will. This is also a study on elite psychopathy.
Thanks for what you are doing. Listening to your videos and your bulletins is an education in psychology in itself. Helps me.being more aware and linking the dots together. You have indeed built a beautiful heritage. (I can’t remember the word you use).
If I understand you right, you once stated that trying to imagine being in someone else’s shoes makes you feel weak (https://narcsite.com/2015/08/31/who-am-i/#comment-95). Do you think this might stem in part from how you see others as weak, so that you would have to imagine yourself as being the same?
Yes and also the threat to control that emanates from having to make such a consideration.
HG, I’d like to understand: does the operation of your cognitive empathy cause a similar response in you (feelings of weakness, threat to control)? I’m thinking in terms of empathy being able to experience or understand the feelings of others. As you don’t have emotional empathy, does the cognitive type not require you to imagine yourself in their place to get at what they feel?
A fair observation Allison and in some instances I have sought to imagine what somebody might feel in a particular situation but that is not always productive. Whilst I have a high executive function, there are certain feelings that I cannot envisage, it is like a void. Instead I find it more effective to watch and listen to somebody in that situation or describing that situation to me about how they felt. I then remember how they described it, how they looked and sounded to use that as part of my cognitive empathy thereafter.
Mr. Tudor,
“in some instances I have sought to imagine what somebody might feel in a particular situation but that is not always productive.”
A story with you in this situation would be an excellent addition to the Narcissism and Psychopathy channel. Please.
“Instead I find it more effective to watch and listen to somebody in that situation or describing that situation to me about how they felt. I then remember how they described it, how they looked and sounded to use that as part of my cognitive empathy thereafter.”
Is this conscious remembering on your part and applying perhaps multiple people’s recollections of their feelings to form your understanding? Or do some have more weight…a work colleague would get less import placed on their experience than your brother in terms of cognitive empathy?
Thank you for your time. Much appreciation.
Dear HG,
That’s amazing to me how your cognitive empathy works so well and you learned at such a young age. I find how you process your environment fascinating.
What situation someone was experiencing that made you want to experience their emotions, or know how they were feeling? I’d really like to understand this thought process of yours. Thanks for your time and knowledge. Xx
Fascinating. You have an amazing mind that makes me want more. I truly enjoy learning about you and I appreciate that you choose to share your world with us. Thank you.
Amazing question, Allison.
Also Elon has demonstrated a lack of empathy in that the vast majority of cuts have hurt the poor and desperate in our country and others and have caused a flood of lawsuits and backlash. The DOGE is challenged as an un-appointed office… and Elon has remarked that AI will take over so many jobs that some “ sort of universal credit” will be needed. I wonder what his idea is of what that would look like. Scary. And Trump has revealed that he has no problem biting the hand that feeds him. His tariff policy caused the wealthy to lose a lot in stocks and hurt their companies, it is not just Tesla. I don’t know how popular Elon is with people, many see him as “ weird eccentric billionaire” sort of a Howard Hughes with his 14 children by 6 women etc…. Whilst ( whilst lol) Trump has deeply ingrained loyal followers who seem to be loyal no matter what the scandal or what he does. I wonder if Trump will take vengeance such as axing the space program which would gut Elon as he is an elite whose motivating factor in my opinion is to create major innovations like Leonardo Di Vinci… not just as a legacy but to achieve. Elon is the richest man in the world. This is no ordinary fight. I just wonder where it will go and if the narcs will double down if not openly… privately…
Contagious,
The points you have made about Musk and Trump create an apt example demonstrating why I don’t really understand politics. It doesn’t resonate with me. I’m not just talking about Musk and Trump but rather politics in a more general sense.
When I think of narcissists like Trump and Musk, I can see that they are ‘powerful’. To me though, they don’t have real ‘power’ when it comes to governing the huge numbers of people who elected them and those who didn’t elect them. Their persistence to ‘govern’ led them to positions that they are not intelligent or ‘powerful’ enough to maintain.
They are behaving like two adolescent boys without much wisdom or foresight at all about the serious consequences of their actions. Also, they are now absorbed in their personal backbiting feud and seem to have forgotten about Trump’s pledge to “make America great again”. It’s all about their own egos while the vast majority of Americans are left to deal with the economic and social fallout of their self-serving actions.
To me, this is not ‘power’ or ‘control’. It’s chaos and if it didn’t have very real consequences for millions of people, it would be a ridiculous circus.
Hello H.G.,
Hope you are well.
In your video with psychic you mentioned how narcissists can pick up on signals of best victims to go after when entering a space. I will be doing an internship as a paramedic at fire station and am a female. These fire houses tend to have a lot of narcissistic and narcissists first responders. It’s very draining and I’ve cried many times in the past from the toxic culture. What things can I do to not be such an easy prey in terms of body language, topics of conversation, and interaction with them. Is it best to interact with them, staying quiet might trigger them bc they can interpret it as being arrogant ? Should I be talkative, engaging , charismatic or stay quiet to myself. Should I carry myself with confident posture or humble posture ? Should I praise them like they often expect in those types of hierarchy? Should I let them just mansplain the entire internship or should I show my intelligence. I’ve notice in past they don’t like me showing that I’m intelligent and have experienced rage from certain individuals when I talked over them or gave my opinion. How should I react if they do mysoginistic jokes, or any sexual harassment directed at me?
Love your work and your work is definitely one of the most eye opening and informative work on narcissism and is saving lives!
Thank you sir !
Hello Dani, these are all excellent questions. You cannot alter who you are (and in some respect one might argue, why should you) however it is logical to consider how yo might best navigate a particular environment such as the one you have experienced. In order to help you effectively, I would need more information about your position and you generally as well as these environments, so I can provide you with a detailed methodology to protect yourself. To do this effectively, I would invite you to organise an audio consultation with me.
Thank you for your compliments about my work, they are appreciated.
Hello HG:
I am still in London Town and having a blissful time! I love London… and with a few days left on my vacation…I am watching the Elon Musk and Trump fallout. This didn’t take long! What’s interesting to me is how exactly alike they are in their attacks on each other. Can’t wait for your analysis:) “ when two narcissists collide…. Drum roll! And I have highly enjoyed the JK series, next to Depp, my favorite personally and the hilarious island series. You are my go-to on the train and plane. Thank you!!!!!
Contagious, hi dear! You’re in the UK and airports?! Tell us how it went, what did you see and sensed? Did you manage to run into HG perhaps or had a dream about running into him???
I once had a dream about running into HG, me being at a grocery store selecting food from a fridge section and when I turned to my left, my gaze fell upon a young man who stood a couple meters in front of me at the wine and champagne section. My instant thought was – Wow!! He looks like an angel in disguise!! His presence was calm and powerful and an immediate resemblance of an image of archangel Gabriel and a Greek god popped into my mind. He radiated an irresistible perfection. The posture, the business casual clothing, the diplomat suitcase, the haircut, the shoes, each detail was a pinpointed needle of magnificence, modest and distinct…Then he turned around, still looking down at the bottle he had selected as he went to the fruit section. The pace and the stepping were of a knight who owns every ground he walks upon…I followed him like a moth drawn to a flame. He stopped at the fruit section for a moment, where the blueberries were, and when he turned his gaze into my direction and began to walk towards me, I looked down in order not to meet his gaze directly as his signature presence was beyond sustainable, it was quite intense…Instead of clashing into one another, I passed seconds in front and he passed behind me as he went to the checkout, leaving an energetic like comet tail swirling everyone and everything into his orbit…I went to the blueberries in order to stand where he stood a moment ago and to sense and to observe him from afar…At the checkout he turned back in my direction and covered his mouth with his hand, I could swear he was smiling, finding it all amusing as if he knew what I was doing…The dream ended, him disappearing.
You mentioned previously that you would dream about HG. What did he look like in your dreams? How did he move? Like a powerful stream? Like a storm? Like a ghost? Like a comet? Like a fire? Like a shadow? Like a robot? Like a fantasy creature?…Could you sustain his presence? Did you interact?
Jordy,
Your dream version of HG made me think of this moment…I feel like it would happen to me if I came face to face with the Ultra…in the situation you described…
https://tenor.com/view/balto-dixie-gif-2063476422551753804
Jordyguin,
Which grocery store were you shopping at when you saw HG in your dream? Was it Tesco or Aldi? Maybe Sainsbury’s or Morrisons?
hmmm… let me put my psychic hat on for a second…
Knowing that every detail about HG was “a pinpointed needle of magnificence, modest and distinct”, and he swanned about radiating “an irrestible perfection,” my intuition says it was Waitrose or Sainbury’s.
I have my groceries delivered.
Wiser,
I wanted to put the dream on pause forever, do you think I cared about the stupid store?
Dani,
Balto&Dixi – ♥︎))))
https://tenor.com/de/view/meghan-markle-megan-markle-meghan-duchess-of-sussex-duchess-gif-20705216
Groceries delivered?!!!!
Leaving the power and control over the state of the broccoli to a mere plebe?
You think you know someone……
I choose. Where I shop they get it right.
Every little helps…
Congrats Dani!
HG:
What has me curious is will Musk and Trump kiss and make up later? Musk is a Greater and Trump type B as I recall or bully, belligerent, boisterous…. Or will this feud carry on.
What do you think?
And what factors? Ie will Trump give him less retape for his rockets and in turn Musk will embrace him again? That sort of thing or ?
You will need to watch my video about the topic, today.
HG, loving the narc island series and very much looking forward to more. I’d also be really interested to know whether musk foresaw how the dynamic would unfold or did he think he could keep trump under wraps at all time?
Hi Dani,
You’ve come to the perfect spot to get the assistance you need.
The Narcisland intro theme created such a build up I was expecting some goddesses images to appear but instead those pics!!!! Made me burst out loud, there was no pre-warning, sir!! I can imagine half of the Tudorites – dead! by choking on food and drinks now.
NO IDEA who would stand tall???? That’s a constellation written in the narc stars! Obviously it must be a Greater Elite but will Angelina be capable of enduring it all or will she abseil in her Evelyn Salt Lara Croft manner?
Two Greaters will be aware of each other and build coterie and camps to fight for them…Who will backstab whom in the end? Anyone could end up on that throne!
Well the first episode broadcasts later today and then you can cast your vote as to who you would have removed.
HG,
I’m really looking forward to this new series! Xx
I cannot believe how good this is!!!! Water is leaking from my eyes, HG, from laughter!! I can’t decide who should go? NO! They harmonise so perfectly. Damn!
I am pleased you are enjoying it.
I’m not just enjoying it HG, but I cannot calm down over your talent! There is not a single junk word, intonation, air grasp or pause. You are in your element and it’s not just an ordinary parody but you are juggling several at once, in an imaginative scenario, letting them react within their repertoire AND according to their school and cadre personality whilst they collide! It’s genius!!! You make the nuances vivid but at the same time it’s just a piece of cake for you where you’re in a high speed capacity of your mind and conjoined rendition! Beautiful, beautiful Enigma!
Thank you.
HG: just when I think you can’t get any more entertaining, you raise the bar even higher! Love it all.
I am on vacation so watching everything I missed and the new stuff. I think I have bought your entire knowledge vault so need more lol.
But I saw an interesting clip on YouTube about BPD. I know your definition is narc or PTSD… my brief summation, could be off… BUT he spoke about the origins… the baby 0-3 who doesn’t get a “ good enough mother” psychopath, narc, drug addict, drunk, mental illness etc… and I have read Melanie Kline “ the good breast” which emphasizes that ages 1-3 the good breast or not good one develops personality and relationships. MANY follow this theory. This BPD YouTube educator said “ hovering is the end ant in an adult body pouring all the love into you that they didn’t get (aka your mommy whether male, female or other) but why the devalue and disgrace is because love to them is to destroy themselves to get mothers love so they ruin relationships. Any one who loves them is really an enemy because subconsciously they know they must destroy themselves and any love. A product of directly or indirectly being told by mommy that they aren’t lovable, they are bad and unworthy of love. Mommy being the dead mother ( see list above). Loving them is making them an enemy in essence. And they will harm you and destroy the love that is good for most people as ultimately they are subconsciously reacting to 0-3 mommy. Now not every narc ( unlike mine) destroys their career, their health, their mental health, their dreams or anything they want to self sabotage but all seem to destroy relationships where there is positivity, nurture and love. They hate it, it seems… it’s fuel but they destroy it and get fuel elsewhere again and again ( I guess cementing narcs are an exception of unity… but no love to destroy)
1. Time and time again I ask myself 0-3? Why so young? Let’s say mommy is a crack head but cleans herself up at 4? How do they know what a baby is thinking… to me it’s where self esteem starts not ends. If mommy respond right, loves and nurtures 0-3 then the seeds are planted “ I matter. I am important. A separate important somebody.” But I would think as the brain develops and more interaction, it could go one way or another. So HG… why did you chose 0-9?
2. Was 0-9 a personal experience?
3. Finally… what about this guys Hoover theory that it is an entrant seeking mommy’s love?
4. And what about this guys devalue/ discard theory that it’s about pleasing 0-3 mother who made them feel worthless and that destroying any healthy love is to honor her or to please her by becoming worthless or in essence rejecting healthy love ( not that in my opinion narcs are worthless.
Others speak of attachment styles, avoidant sounds like narcs, then there is the DSM that says BPD get engulfed by love or feel suffocated by it but actually desperate to be loved.
5. Finally what about DBT?. It’s not designed solely for PTSD. It’s a good method to learn how to cope and control emotions. I personally think it would be great for me or anyone. Take a bath, squeeze a lemon, take a deep breath, change your mind frame before acting. Even psychopaths can improve their actions by taking classes to do so. Improve, not change. My understanding is psychopath classes are designed to get them to cognitively see how changing their behavior to fit societal norms is better for them.
5. DBT is even said to cure BPD… I think it has the effect the same as psychopath classes if providing coping mechanisms to ummm fury? To reduce the acting out that causes social harm to the narc/bpd. But I am no doctor or expert.
6. How effective is DBT for a narcr?
Thank you!
It all depends on the voters, Jordy. I know who I want gone first…based on names alone, but I will wait to see if the person provides a level of entertainment with the other contestants…if they are more entertaining, I might vote differently.
I wish Elizabeth I would have been there…fascinating lady, amazing life…and frankly not known for enjoying the company of other women…but she had to do what she had to do…she’s my favorite British monarch. “No, brother-in-law…I’m not allowing Francis to attack your boats.” *later that day* “You are now Sir Francis Drake…go steal his gold for England. And remember… Have fun!” It would be interesting to see what she would do absent her enforcement capabilities.
Dear Hg,
what is (generally) the purpose of the lieutenant’s seduction/flirting?
Testing the defences of the target.
Thank you.
In may case she did this for weeks. We had dates (she is married!) and very sweet/exciting moments.
And then she stopped (when she was sure about my infatuation).
She remarked about our strong friendship etc.
Yesterday, when she was talking to the narc and met me, she ignored me… Like the Narc. Who hates me because I had imposed the no contact after been shelved.
An addition pain on N abuse.
Could u create some material about this kind of situations?
About what kind of situations?
The seduction of the lieutenant.
I was thinking to use the mail consultation with you.
But the seduction stopped (i don’t understand why)after weeks.
I was falling in love with the lieutenant (common friend).
But it was just an exciting flirt/sex talk for her…
Maybe she was just trying to –testing the defences–.
But I’m still confused and curious about other possible reasons.
Mr. Tudor,
I just listened to the interview with Annabelle of Fortune Cookies Tarot. I don’t trust her. She kept redirecting or dodging your questions.
Did she ever agree to do a remote viewing on you? Its interesting that she said she needed time and would need to close her eyes and concentrate. Yet her husband was able to do it while he was driving. I smell bull shit! You gave her just enough rope to hang herself. I thoroughly enjoyed that.
I am pleased you enjoyed the interview. No, no remote viewing occurred.
Dear Mr Tudor,
Was the interview meant to cut off suddenly? She certainly has the “gift of the gab” without taking a breath haha
Must’ve been an early morning interview, as it looked like she just rolled out of bed.
I thought she wanted to learn about narcissism from you ! Pity it was all about her. Typical narc profiting off the gullible, oh well, she’s servicing a need out there
The “broad brush” of it was that I was “door knobbed” ! Hahahahah
Many thanks for the “long winded” experience Haha
Ps I enjoyed your questions
Hmm Leigh, I hardly bear to listen to her for very long at all and she certainly likes the sound of her own voice. Enough said?
Hi Alexis!
Its so nice to see your name pop up!
Yes! Definitely enough said!
Dear Alexis,
How lovely to see you again, hope you’ll stay 💕
I only persisted listening because of Mr Tudor, otherwise I would’ve tuned out. My mum (RIP now) dabbled in tarot, spells, runes, crystals, spirit guides n such, however, she truly believed it and didn’t profit money wise.
Personally, I didn’t warm to Annabelle and my female intuition vibed red flags haha
Oh Bubbles,
I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your mom. I hope you’re doing ok. I’m sending lots of hugs.
I agree about Annabelle. My spidey sense was tingling during the whole interview!
Lovely to see you too, both Leigh and Bubbles. I always look out for anything new which piques my interest. as well as comments from us old timers 🙂
I’m sorry to read about your mum Bubbles. I don’t really go in for tarot reading etc either, but it’s great your mum enjoyed it. I’m personally not spiritual but I do believe past energies sometimes become trapped. And my husband can see auras. I’m trying to learn.
Hi Leigh!
“She kept redirecting or dodging your questions.” — I listened to it several times…and I still don’t know quite what to make of her…I thought some of Mr. Tudor’s questions seemed straightforward enough. He was quite patient with her circular conversation as well. I couldn’t decide if that was based more upon honesty (regarding the astrology and not completing her certification (though she said at one point that there was no certification for psychics). Also, I’ve seen a number of shows that debunk the way psychics work or explain it.
What do you think her Tudor classification is? I’m kind of lost on it…she sounded contagion like at points…but then there was the dodging of questions and particularly her husband (a man of science) and her stories about the ghost and the remote viewing. She also emphasized her morality frequently in the field of “psychics.” There could be different reasons for that emphasis.
What I found entertaining was when she said: “I don’t advise people on what to do.” And: “for entertainment purposes only.” My thought was…why not cut the price down, buy a tarot deck and use the internet to interpret what the cards are “telling” you. Why is the professional needed? And I question how familiar she is with HG’s work when she says that he is more broad brush than her. I feel like just the basic information one would seek before having the conversation with him would lead to the fact that HG does consultations with bespoke advice. To say nothing of the detectors and the like.
An important question, Leigh, if you were hiring and Mr. Tudor walked in, sat on your desk and caressed your chin whilst staring into your eyes…what would you do if the planets told you to hire him? (HG’s vivid imagery gave me the giggles…)
Hi Dani,
Off the top of my head, I’m going with MMR A, Overwhelming Angel. I say that because she think she’s helping.
I think she’s good a reading and understanding people’s behaviors. I definitely believe we all have some sort of intuition. She’s probably learned how to hone that skill.
I loved when Mr. Tudor pointed out that an applicant could find all the information about a job opening in the job description.
The biggest thing for me was how she kept saying that she’s an ethical psychic. If she’s so ethical, why isn’t she using her remote viewing gift to find criminals or missing children. Instead she’s using it to find missing pets or homes for sale. You can find homes for sale online. Why does someone need her psychic abilities?
Lol! Yes, Mr. Tudor’s vivid descriptions always paints a picture for me.
She blinked a lot too. It reminded me of TOW.
Yeah, but remember, a determination if someone is a narcissist can only be made upon the observation of behaviours over a sustained period of time, or/and a research of evidence. Before that we can only speak of narcissist indicators. You must at least also consider a narcissistic person or a normal who can share similar narcissistic traits and behaviour.
Blinking is not an indicator, it’s a physiological reaction to stress all people can exhibit, or be an irritation to contacts. Spidey-senses and first impressions need to be confirmed by a list of evidence of repetitive behaviour over a sustained period of time. Otherwise, where is the difference between a person who glances once into their crystal ball and knows everything and a person who hasn’t done the extensive research but throws a personality disorder diagnosis upon a person they only saw in an interview once?
Hi Jordy,
I’m not a medical professional and that means what I say is just an opinion. Its not a diagnosis. I’m just some random person on the internet. This is my opinion about Annabelle and you’re free to disagree with me.
Hi Leigh! Sure that’s your opinion, I’m totally fine with that. Could be that you’ve developed a keen eye for narcs by now and can spot them quite easy. You’re a longstanding reader and student of Mr. Tudor, may ask for how long?
Hi Jordy,
I’ve been here for 6 years. I have a lot of narcs in my life. My husband, one of my daughters and both of my parents are narcs. So when I see someone display similar behaviors, its a red flag to me.
Understood, thank you, Leigh!
Leigh,
“Hi WN…I don’t think you’re bossy…”
This narcissist, just five minutes ago, bossed an intelligent grown up man, the author of this blog, who puts lots of effort into the content he creates, doing it in an unrivaled manner, be it the substantial analysis he undertakes or an unrivaled parody series for educational purposes — she just did it in front of you on Narc Island Episode 1 thread.
She devalued, berated, blamed, shamed and then deflected after being called out on her hypocrisy.
I think it’s because you’ve been permanently around narcissists your whole life, you let this shite slide so easily, which she does repeatedly, whilst distracting by sprinkling her compliments around, buying you cheap.
Spidey senses are a very good attribute, but actually looking at the behaviour over a sustained period of time could prove more superior.
I don’t know that she’s a narcissist. I’ve only seen the one interview with her. I don’t think her content would be of interest to me. Mr. Tudor has said that Princess Marta from Norway is an empath, and she is quite involved in what sounds like similar spiritual interests. Spiritual interests, psychics, religions, etc. are not exclusive to narcissists. They have appeal to all Tudor classifications, just with different drivers.
Something strange to me:
She said she picks up on narcissists easily and thwarts them (with her psychic powers). Shade of the false super empath? Genuine sensitivity + common misconception?
She said things that sounded very like a contagion empath–being sensitive to the emotions of others at the hospital. Being stopped and having to take a few moments to “raise her shield?” Her husband was with her. Couldn’t that also be for fuel and control of the IPPS? She very rapidly fuel (if she needs fuel). It sounded like she stopped him in his tracks…to attend to her when his parent was admitted. She didn’t shield herself–knowing she ‘needs to’ on the way there. I feel like an empath who knows they are sensitive would do so, particularly by her age. She was aware she ‘needed’ to at the time. Her husband asked if she’d forgotten “to shield.” So based on her story, she’d communicated about this with him in the past. I don’t know how habitual “forgetting” is for her.
What sounded most off about that to me about a contagion empath was that she said she enjoyed taking on all the emotions of people at the airport…and I don’t think any majority contagions who’ve spoken here have indicated an enjoyment in taking on the emotions of others. But with them being the rarest school, maybe there are “emotion junkies” for lack of a better way to put it…but I don’t think so. Mr. Tudor has remained fully consistent about contagion empaths feeling burdened by the emotions of others.
To be cynical–Knowing her husband is at the store…is it psychic powers or a locator app?
I don’t know. I think people vary in how they view spiritual matters. But something about her and her near constant smirking throughout her conversation was unnerving to me. She reminded me of Lucifer the cat from Disney’s Cinderella…
Hi Dani,
I have a small amount of Contagion so for me the emotions of someone else have to be intense and I have to be right next to them. When it happens, its nerve wracking and incredibly draining. My empath daughter (confirmed by Mr. Tudor) also has Contagion. She has about twice as much as I do. She has to take mass transit to work and often has to wear headphones so she can turn off the noise. That’s how she describes the emotions she feels from the other passengers. My daughter doesn’t like feeling all of those emotions all at once. On her days off she prefers to have limited contact with people so she can decompress. Thank you for reminding me about that comment that Annabelle made.
She definitely displayed some hypocrisy. She needed to be shields up at the hospital but at the airport she was good with taking on other people’s emotions.
“It sounded like she stopped him in his tracks…to attend to her when his parent was admitted.” I think you’re on to something there. Was she wounded that her husband was there for his family and so she had to nullify that threat to control?
I’m thoroughly convinced now. I think as empaths we make far too many excuses and try to rationalize someone’s questionable behavior. I don’t want to do that anymore. The very fact that she’s not using this “gift” to even attempt to find any missing children proves to me she’s not as wonderful as she thinks she is.
HG, Leigh, Dani and Jordyguin,
Regarding HG’s interview with Annabelle of Fortune Cookies Tarot, I listened to about half of it and then stopped.
I found that Annabelle’s views and knowledge about astrology in particular was limited, very superficial, and frankly, incorrect. This annoyed me. I think she is trying to be an expert across a number of things – that is, tarot, psychic ability and astrology – at the same time and it results in shallow and confusing information.
Each area is very different from the other and you can’t just lump them all together in one big group and treat them all the same way. They are independent of each other in terms of how they provide insights, what they encompass, and what kind of information they are based on.
Personally, I have an interest in astrology. I have not looked into tarot or things like clairvoyance much at all. With regard to astrology, I have read quite a lot about it over many years. Even so, I would not describe myself as an ‘expert’. There is a lot to read, contemplate and understand about astrology. I also definitely would not charge people for astrological readings. My interest in astrology is purely for my own self-interest.
The other thing I found annoying about the interview (to be frank) is HG’s line of questioning. In relation to astrology, HG wanted some kind of scientific proof or evidence about how planets can determine someone’s future.
For the umpteenth time, the purpose of astrology is NOT to predict what will happen in the future with some kind of isolated pinpoint accuracy.
Let me say that again:
The purpose of astrology is NOT to predict the future with some kind of isolated pinpoint accuracy.
And again, to reinforce the point:
The purpose of astrology is NOT to predict the future with some kind of isolated pinpoint accuracy.
Consider these concepts:
You can’t look at intuition by putting it under a microscope.
You can’t see emotional sensitivity with an x-ray.
You can’t read someone’s mind by dissecting their brain in an autopsy.
However…
This does not mean that intuition does not exist.
It does not mean that emotional sensitivity is not real.
It does not mean that the unconscious mind is not there.
Consider the obsession with needing to see scientific proof of certain things in yet another way…
Before HG came along with his insightful information about narcissism, there were plenty of ‘experts’ who discussed narcissism ad nauseum as a personality disorder in different ways. There were psychiatrists, researchers, academics, therapists, marriage counsellors, agony aunts, etc. There is the DSM manual that lists the relevant traits. There were scientists that studied the brains of prisoners to learn about psychopathy, etc etc.
Before HG came along, there was lots of information about narcissism swirling about for those interested in reading about it.
There was information about relationships, love, togetherness, family, marriage, you name it.
In general, the conventional wisdom and advice often cited was “if you really love someone and you want your relationship to succeed, tell them and show them how much you love them. Be honest and upfront and they will know and respond positively.”
So people talked and sang and wrote about love. Empaths loved and loved and loved until they could love no more.
It didn’t work and it didn’t change the narcissism – in fact, the narcissism got worse. But people couldn’t see the reality of the situation.
When the reality of narcissism could not be seen clearly and the advice and conventional wisdom kept getting it wrong, did that mean that narcissism did not exist at all?
No, certainly not. Those being abused by narcissists in relationships definitely knew that narcissism existed. They knew beyond any shadow of a doubt that narcissism was real even though the conventional information and wisdom made it difficult to see and understand accurately.
There simply wasn’t a way of seeing the reality clearly because it was clouded by a whole lot of misleading (conventional) information.
Hi WN,
I just wanted to clarify, my comment was specifically about Annabelle. My intuition/spidey sense says she’s full of shit. She may be intuitive but that doesn’t mean she’s a psychic. I don’t trust her at all.
“What sounded most off about that to me about a contagion empath was that she said she enjoyed taking on all the emotions of people at the airport…and I don’t think any majority contagions who’ve spoken here have indicated an enjoyment in taking on the emotions of others.”
Dani, it totally depends. If the contagion is at her/his limits and all the resources are emptied, there is no way one can sustain being around people or certain places.
But if the contagion-part is fed (by nature or other harmony and beauty in life) — the resources become refilled and being at airports and parks, for instance where people are just observed, filled with curiosity — is not a problem. In this case the necessity of participation in order to help resolve their difficulties, falls away and no energy transfer via “standing in their shoes” and feeling what they feel — which is a dissonance — doesn’t occur, because there is no total contact.
Where one is not whole because of the emotional carnage which is usually going on amidst the chaos of why there is so much pain in the world and people are not noticing it and adding on to it — makes the shields come down just by this irritation alone and the disharmony of perceptual noise can become unbearable.
In a resourceful state it’s different but it’s a constant battle, especially where there is no access to a refill station so to speak.
I think the reason why contagions turn to spirituality, the esoteric and the paranormal is because the majority perspective on life doesn’t explain what is truly happening in the world and doesn’t explain to contagions anything about their heightened feeling ability, which makes them seek answers beyond just what is normalised.
Interesting point and very keen…Dani. I don’t think you take on the emotions of others with glee. Some feel overwhelmed by it. Others might take it as it just is. But I can’t imagine anyone would be excited as usually it’s pain.
I agree Dani. The hanging out in airports was a dead giveaway. She took a location that she would expect people to associate with positive emotion, then described herself enjoying hanging out there for that reason. I’ve been through more than my fair share of airports. They are not filled exclusively with positive emotion. At all.
Similarly my ears pricked up at her use of a shield. I am not majority Contagion but even I would know to shield before going into an ICU.
If I was un-shielded for a specific reason ( I wanted to feel the person I was visiting) but then felt the need to shield, I would simply raise it. There would be no need to announce it, or remove myself as she describes, it would be raised within seconds. It is interesting though that she references use of a shield. Maybe she reads this blog!
I don’t know enough about remote viewing to make comment. I know about Ingo Swann -who I think she alluded to- but that’s it.
I don’t know anything about astrology other than I know my star sign is a fire sign and Scorpios are generally best avoided! (My mum is Scorpio.)
In terms of tarot and clairvoyance, I’m a cynic in the main. I think most ‘psychics’ are simply people readers in an observational and linguistic sense. People that go to see them often want to be read so there’s a symbiosis. Readings are vague and it is the listener who gives them meaning in my view.
I will say though that I have had one experience with a clairvoyant that was so detailed, so specific and so true I can only conclude that some people do actually have a gift that cannot be explained via the usual logical means.
“Entertainment purposes only.” For me, that suggested she was aware that she was putting on a show, at least in part. If she was Mid Range or Lesser she would believe what she was saying was entirely true.
She also appeared to operate within a loose moral framework, not telling people what to do but instead suggesting changes that might be made to improve their own circumstances. I didn’t fully buy in to that but there was at least an awareness of what she ought not to do.
She is a Jack of all trades. If you are a tarot card reader, specialise in that. If you are an astrologer be an excellent astrologer. I found it difficult to believe that she was an astrologer, tarot card reader, psychic, remote viewer, psychic realtor, psychic mentor and half of a psychic pet finding duo. At least she gets to cover a broader market and that for me, was the point.
Strangely, she might actually be a normal.
Xx
Hi TS,
When I heard her say that she uses a shield, I instantly thought of you and wondered if it she’d been on the blog too. Imagine that. Is she reading our comments right now? LOL!
The comment “For entertainment purposes only” stood out to me too. In the beginning she talked about helping people find a job, get a promotion or find a home. I found those two things to be a bit of hypocrisy. Are her readings helping them with real issues like finding a job or a home or are they for entertainment purposes only? I think that comment was said because she felt a threat to control when questioned about not sharing with her client if their partner was cheating. I thought she deflected a lot.
I have a question regarding shielding though. How do you do it? It might help my daughter.
HI Jordy,
I could be making incorrect conclusions based on not having a wide range of contagions to ask this of. Maybe there is contagion in her, but she’s not a majority. Maybe it’s character trait acquisition from a contagion empath that she met. I don’t know. I haven’t seen enough of her. I think it looks and sounds fishy…but you know…I don’t know if her husband frequently travelled for work or how often she takes people to the airport. It seems that she would get fuel from their gratitude, the chance to throw her kindness in their face later, control through benign manipulation. (I don’t know if she’s a narc. I’m just trying to point out that a narcissist would do the same thing–but it wouldn’t be because of emotional empathy) I don’t know if nature makes her feel rejuvenated. That wasn’t covered within the scope of the conversation. It sounded like the place that juiced her up was the airport…which doesn’t make sense for a contagion empath, based on what Mr. Tudor has been consistent in sharing with his followers. And Mr. Tudor has said that even good feelings of others can be a burden to the contagion.
I don’t know what Annabelle is. I’m not trying to make a guess, though I am always interested in hearing the perspectives and guesses of others who’ve been watching and reading longer. I like to know what they see, so I can find where I need to sharpen my observation skills. There are inaccuracies between my understanding and what I understood her to be relating.
Hi Dani,
I don’t see my response to you so I’m resending it just in case I got that nonce verification error. I might’ve gotten it and didn’t notice.
I think Annabelle displayed a bit of hypocrisy. At the hospital she needed to shield but at the airport she enjoyed it. There’s plenty of unhappy people at airports as well.
I have some contagion. Its a small amount though. I need to be next to someone and their emotions need to be heightened in order to feel their emotions. When it happens to me, I find draining, not enjoyable. My empath daughter also has contagion. About double the amount I do. She takes mass transit to work. She has to wear headphones so she can turn off the noise. That’s how she describes the emotions that she feels from others. On her days off, she has to take time to decompress.
I think you hit the nail on the head when you said, “Couldn’t that also be for fuel and control of the IPPS?” That’s how I see it. “It sounded like she stopped him in his tracks…to attend to her when his parent was admitted.” She used her supposed gift as a way to nullify the threat to her control over her husband.
The biggest issue for me is how come she’s not using this supposed gift for good. Why isn’t she helping to find criminals or missing children?
I’m convinced now more than ever.
Hi Leigh,
There are a few things to bear in mind here. First I am particularly visual. It’s very normal for me to visualise all kinds of things. Some pieces of music I listen to and see a movie in my minds eye as I listen. Emotion in the music will stimulate a visual response. I convert emotion into images on a fairly regular basis.
Secondly, the shield evolved into what it is now. I didn’t create a fully formed process or image. Originally I think the bare bones of it came into play as a defence against my mum. I was very young when it clicked with me that my mum wanted a reaction, she wanted me to cry or shout back. I recognised that my emotions were a currency of sorts.
I started to draw my emotions back into myself. I felt anger, upset, fear, frustration etc but I resolved not to give those feelings to her. I would draw them in and look through her as if looking through glass. Focus past her not on her. This obviously enraged her, but seeing her lose her mind like that just reinforced the fact that what I was doing worked. She was upset, angry etc, I was safe within myself.
Over time, I think this just evolved to ‘no emotions in, no emotions out.’ I do not show so I do not feel. As I am so visual, this emotional energy translated to a shield, or glass dome in my case. I can’t really remember the first time I visualised in that way but the visualisation helps the process. I am still present, still me but my emotions are safely within the shield and whatever madness is going on outside remains outside.
So for me, the focus was originally to pull back my emotions, the side effect was that I kind of fell into blocking other people’s emotions out. Now I shield consciously when I’m at my limit. I’m tired, stressed out, or at emotional capacity. At that point I shut up shop and shield because I haven’t anything left to give to anyone, my battery is flat. The only exception is with my kids. I never shield around them, Im always open no matter how ‘at capacity’ I might be.
I would consciously shield if going into an ICU, it isn’t the fact that the emotions are largely negative, it’s the weight of them, the pressing in of them.
My dad was in ICU a few years ago, I found it oppressive as soon as they buzzed me in through the doors.
My empath friend can tell when I’m shielding. He has openly asked me on a couple of occasions and he was right. He told me that there’s no emotional signature as there is normally. Essentially, I ‘don’t feel of anything.’
I think for your daughter there are two things to concentrate on. The first would be that she needs to feel her own emotional presence. To feel within herself, to recognise her own emotions moving through and seeping from her. She knows herself best so really she needs to start there. Once she can recognise her own emotions moving and flowing she can then start to pull them back in. It’s awareness really. As she pulls her own emotions in, she can then learn to push the emotions of others out. As she feels them, she recognises they aren’t hers and she then pushes them away. She isn’t obligated to accept the emotions of others, she can refuse. She shouldn’t feel any guilt for pushing back.
The second thing is to do these exercises but with some form of visualisation. I do think visualisation helps to mentally log the process, as I said though I visualise all sorts so maybe that element is just part of my own functioning. People can be taught to visualise though. It is a teachable skill that appears in quite unexpected fields. This is a great example of the power of visualisation and tangible results it can achieve.
https://youtube.com/shorts/ZNI0kajS0JI?si=byKbbRnu40UYhJTX
You might want to show your daughter that video (with HG’s permission) so she understands visualisation isn’t as crazy as it sounds! Maybe she mentally visualises a wall being built brick by brick around herself, or a wave of water, anything as long as she can see it clearly in her minds eye and can link it tightly to the emotional ebb and flow. Then I think she’ll kind of fall into her own way of handling it. Her own ‘shield’ will just evolve as she practices. Hopefully. Difficult for me to say, mine started as a kid’s defiance melded with a kid’s imagination.
I used to view the shield as a bit crazy but more recently I have come to understand that people who feel deeply have to find a way to protect themselves, this just happens to be my way.
Xx
Hi TS,
Your reaction to your mother’s manipulations is similar to how I reacted to my father. At some point I learned to stop reacting to him. I knew crying would only make it worse, so I stopped crying. When I feel like I’m being manipulated, I’ve learned to put a wall up. I think my daughter has too. She’s really good at blocking out her father and her sister.
As far as naturally feeling other people’s emotions, I don’t know if she’s figured out quite yet how to shield from that. She often needs to decompress because of the bombardment of emotions. She’s also not quite at the point yet where she can differentiate between hers and other people’s emotions. I say that because I’ve seen her react when someone else is feeling something and she’s experiencing it. I actually had to point it out that I thought she was feeling the other person’s emotions, not her own. She’s definitely getting better at it though.
She’s very visual herself as well. I’ll definitely suggest that visualizing a shield around her will be helpful in keeping the unwanted emotions out. I’ll pass the video on as well.
I just thought of something. Your comment about your empath friend recognizing when you’re shielding is interesting. Sometimes I feel similar with my daughter. I don’t get an emotional read on her. Maybe she’s already learned how to shield. Hmmm.
Thank you for help with this, TS. I really appreciate it.
Hi Leigh!
I hate the nonce verification error! It’s ruined some beautiful questions…that I worked so hard to think up for Mr. Tudor…
“I think Annabelle displayed a bit of hypocrisy. At the hospital she needed to shield but at the airport she enjoyed it.” — I agree. I found her contradictory. There were several points she made (where if they’re true) that would argue against her needing fuel.
Leigh: “I have some contagion. Its a small amount though.”
Insignificant/Significant in terms of Tudor percentages?
I think you hit the nail on the head when you said, “Couldn’t that also be for fuel and control of the IPPS?” That’s how I see it. — She also said that he continued on after they got her settled. (She didn’t have a prolonged fit) It ended up being working out that she didn’t shield because she did a reading for someone later that evening.
“Why isn’t she helping to find criminals or missing children?” — She said it wasn’t always accurate which is why people should track it. She said she could get street names and see people standing there in real time. (To me that is very accurate–if she has never been to a place before and she can later determine that those street names are real) She said it took much concentration, but her husband (who is a gifted beginner) was able to do so whilst driving.
To be an advocate for the other side…Hypothetical: a contagion empath has psychic abilities and can remote view and find whatever they want (we’re going to assume that we all believe for the sake of the hypothetical)…why would they not want to look for missing children? — Imagine the type of disgusting images they might encounter. I can think of many reasons…for a contagion empath to avoid that.
I don’t know what Annabelle is. I have far too little evidence to determine based on the Tudor evidential threshold…I see narcissistic indicators. Maybe she just has a bad case of magical thinking. Maybe she’s been right about some things. Maybe when she’s been correct, it’s a coincidence. Maybe it isn’t. Maybe talking to Mr. Tudor, a narcissistic psychopath who questioned her about her beliefs/abilities, was an external stressor that caused more narcissistic behaviours to come out.
Mr. Tudor repeatedly interrupted her and sometimes used a tone, and she didn’t lose her temper. That seemed like a good sign. That being said–Mr. Tudor is a narcissistic psychopath, and he was patient with her as well. Though, there was a moment when that patience frayed just a tiny bit…it was a definite “We disagree. I understand that. This part of the conversation is over.” I found that moment interesting. I don’t recall hearing that tone and firmness before…it reminded me of a story Mr. Tudor mentioned about a male friend of a former IPPS who repeatedly tried to flirt with him…whom he had to correct because he didn’t appreciate that behaviour. I imagine his tone in that situation to be similar.
Are you skeptical about psychics/mediums/etc in general?
HI Dani,
I’ve started the process of copying my comments before I send them just in case I get the nonce verification error. This way I’m safe rather than sorry.
I think I remember seeing that Mr. Tudor said we’re not allowed to share the specifics of our empath detector results. If Mr. Tudor is ok with it, I’d be happy to share. But I won’t unless he says its ok.
I think there were a number of indicators in such a small timeframe that really made me think that she was a narcissist. The circular conversations, dodging the questions, redirecting, contradictory statements, the smirks, the blinking.
Did you see my question for Mr. Tudor that was posted today? To summarize, the question was would we see cold fury more from an MMR A or B if they needed to maintain a facade. His answer was yes. Maybe Annabelle felt the need to maintain a facade and so that’s why she didn’t react in a negative way towards Mr. Tudor. I did see threats to her control though. I think that’s why she made that comment about “For Entertainment Purposes Only.” She felt threatened because she need to justify why she chose not share if she learned her client’s partner was cheating. Saying it was for entertainment purposed only, nullified the threat to control. Earlier in the interview she said she helped her clients with finding a job and a home. Those are real life issues and not for entertainment. So which one is it?
As for Contagions hypothetically being able to remote view and see children suffering and wanting to avoid those images, I don’t know if I agree with that. Take for instance JK Rowling. She saw a picture in a newspaper and was drawn to it. She knew she had to read it even though she knew it would be tough to read. It turned out to be about deplorable conditions in orphanages and it moved her to act. As an empath, I’d be moved to help too. I wouldn’t care how it would affect me because I’m not the one actually living it. I’d find a way to detach. If I could do something to help a missing or abused child and I did nothing about it, that would bother me more than seeing the hell they live in.
Am I a skeptic of mediums and psychics in general? Yes, I think they’ve learned to use their natural intuition and how to read someone’s body language to figure things out.
Leigh,
I think your view of her being full of shit is a general opinion while my view of her being inaccurate about astrology is a specific opinion.
We are both coming to the same conclusion overall. I think we are taking different paths to get there, though.
I didn’t listen to the whole interview because I found it annoying so I didn’t hear all of Annabelle’s answers to HG’s questions.
The aspect that irritated me was that people in general tend to think that if such so-called ‘psychics’ are full of it, then the subjects they are talking about, (i.e. astrology or tarot or clairvoyance), must be full of it too.
I think people tend to make the quick decision that if the psychic is a fraud then the subject they’re talking about is a fraud as well.
I don’t think this is true. The two things shouldn’t be conflated.
People speak of ‘spidey senses’ and the term has become normalised. When hearing the term, people generally accept it unquestioningly. They don’t stop the speaker and say, “hang on a minute, what do you actually mean by spidey senses? How can you prove to me scientifically that your spidey senses are actually real so that I can see concrete proof of them?”
The more I contemplate this particular thread, the more I think that ‘science’ and ‘spirituality’ (or intuition, etc) are generally treated as two separate and competing concepts.
Before there was such a strong reliance on science, there was more reliance and faith in spirituality. Now that humans have the ability to test things scientifically with much more precision than they were capable of in previous times in history, the concept of spirituality and belief in it is minimised.
To me, there is space and need for both science and spirituality.
Indeed, I think even the term ‘spirituality’ makes things like intuition, spidey senses, and even ’emotions’ sound like some otherworldly mysterious and foreign concepts. I don’t think they are so ‘otherworldly’. It’s just that people want proof and it’s not easy to show concrete proof.
Leigh,
I think you and I both came to the same conclusion about Annabelle, even though we got there in different ways.
Hi WN,
You’re correct. Its not ok to assume that just because someone’s a fraud it means the subject matter they’re discussing is fraudulent as well. I do tend to be a bit cynical and untrusting sometimes.
Often times people don’t take my spidey sense seriously. They think I’m out of my mind. LOL! Thank you, WN. I should try to be more open about these things.
Truthseeker,
“The hanging out in airports was a dead giveaway. She took a location that she would expect people to associate with positive emotion…” — I suppose she has never heard Pastor Copeland talk about how “flying commercial is like being in a tube with a bunch of demons.” Oh I forgot he didn’t say that…and jabbed his finger furiously in the face of a journalist for suggesting it.
The concept of shielding is all over YouTube. Easy to find. It’s prevalent amongst the psychic community.
“I will say though that I have had one experience with a clairvoyant that was so detailed, so specific and so true I can only conclude that some people do actually have a gift that cannot be explained via the usual logical means.” — Fascinating. If you’re comfortable sharing, I’d be curious to hear more.
“Entertainment purposes only.” For me, that suggested she was aware that she was putting on a show, at least in part. If she was Mid Range or Lesser she would believe what she was saying was entirely true.
“She also appeared to operate within a loose moral framework.” — I agree.
“there was at least an awareness of what she ought not to do.” — She also was aware of an audience, so that might be facade management (which all classifications engage in to different extents). And I would say that a midrange narcissist knows hitting is wrong. It doesn’t mean they would not hit their partner and tell them they deserved it.
“She is a Jack of all trades.” — Master of none, in my opinion.
“I found it difficult to believe that she was an astrologer, tarot card reader, psychic, remote viewer, psychic realtor, psychic mentor and half of a psychic pet finding duo. At least she gets to cover a broader market and that for me, was the point.” — I agree that that is difficult to believe. You forgot she got her past life regression certificate somewhat recently…but there are no official certificates or licenses for psychics. She seems to be getting numerous certificates that prove she knows what she’s talking about. (But who is she getting them from–and why should people consider them valid?) Medical doctors have a state license to prove that they are qualified to dispense medication and health advice.
“Strangely, she might actually be a normal.” — I have been leaning toward narcissistic or normal. But I could be wrong. The only one who knows is Mr. Tudor…and he probably had it figured out quite quickly.
Airports are a magical place. Whereelse does one get to see so many cultures, nationalities and a variety of characters concentrated in one spot? To get a glimpse of the world in one huge building, this makes airports unusual. People are more vulnerable particularly in this location, for some reason they’re more open to be “seen” as they tend to look into one’s eyes longer, because there is perhaps this curiosity “of the world” one encounters in a dense number of people… Some people think differently at airports and it shows in their faces, there is either a delay in their usual mental chatter or it concentrates even stronger…
The energy is different at the departures and the arrivals. Those who arrive, as they come along the “catwalk” when all eyes are on them — they “walk” like an open book sometimes. Perhaps due to the vulnerability the flying makes them experience…
The energy at the departures is mixed. People head into the unknown — the sky. In flight, humans disconnect from what their physical body was made for. Flying is out of the ordinary and the departure halls are uniquely woven starting points into many different worlds. A quiet before the storm, where a bound to earth human transgresses the boundaries of what is possible. Consciously or subconsciously all people sense something out of the ordinary at the manmade world gates, as they sail into the unknown from an air-port.
Perhaps a person with some contagion aspect may be referencing these feelings they catch when speaking of liking being at airports and “absorbing” (unusual) energies around them?
Hi TS and Leigh!
“It is interesting though that she references use of a shield. Maybe she reads this blog!”
“Energetic shielding” and “shielding” is a common term which appears in technology and in the context of metaphysical and spiritual practices where individuals visualise or intent to create a protective energetic barrier around themselves.
In science fiction it’s the concept of “force fields” or “energy shields” or “deflector shields” as a defensive barrier.
In the scientific and engineering fields it’s the concepts like “electromagnetic shielding” (using conductive materials to block electromagnetic fields) and “radiation shielding” (using materials to absorb or deflect radiation), which conceptually align with the idea of “energetic shielding” for protection.
“Energetic shielding” has evolved in both scientific/fictional and spiritual contexts to describe the act of creating a protective barrier, whether through advanced technology or intentional energetic practices.
Hi Jordy,
The term “energetic shielding” is a new term for me. I guess that’s a bit naive of me. I didn’t realize people actually shield themselves from the emotions and energy of other people. But it certainly makes sense that people would do that. For me, I detach more than I shield.
Thank you for this info. I’ll have to check it out.
Hi Dani,
In answer to your question about the clairvoyant.
My friend Katie was really into psychics / tarot card readers and clairvoyants. She researched, knew her stuff who to see who to avoid. She asked me to go with her one evening after work. I was curious, thought it would be a laugh so along I went.
The clairvoyant was in Nottingham, his house was called The Warren. We arrived, he came out to greet us and led me to a garden room to wait while Katie went in first. The garden room was filled with rabbit hutches, stacked on each other, loads of rabbits to watch and keep me entertained.
Katie came out of the room, we passed each other and I asked her how it went, she responded, “Good, I think!”
The room was brightly lit. There was a smallish table in the centre, two chairs facing each other and a pack of tarot cards on the table. The reading was to be part tarot, part clairvoyant. He addressed me by name and motioned for me to sit. He asked me why I was there and I explained that I was really just there to keep my friend company. He asked if there was anything I wanted to know specifically, I responded that there wasn’t. He asked if there was anyone I had in mind who had ‘passed over’, again I responded there wasn’t.
He told me that there were two males who had passed over. They were keen to give me a message because they had also been in the room during Katie’s reading, waiting for me.
The first part of the reading was tarot. I shuffled the cards, handed them to him and he laid them out in formation on the table. They started with current position, then people of influence, romantic relationships, future outcomes. He was right about current position, occupation etc so I’ll condense to most notable aspects.
He told me the following.
1. The man I was currently dating was the man I would marry. The first letter of his name was J, he was older than me but not excessively so, he was very tall and he worked in the same company as me, we would date for a number of years before marrying. (All true.)
2. He asked what was the significance of the US. I said there was no significance. He asked if I planned to work there, or live there, or if I had family there. I responded “ No significance, no future plans involving the US.” He responded, “Well I can tell you that you will spend a significant length of time there. You will move there within the next five years.” ( True. A little over five years later. I was in the US for 10yrs total.)
3. He told me I would have two children. A boy and a girl. He said that he kept seeing the word ‘twins’ , but this isn’t correct as he knows the boy is older than the girl. He stated that both names began with the letter S. The pregnancies would be straightforward and no issues with falling pregnant or ‘failed pregnancies.’ He laughed and told me that the names held an amusing significance that I will only remember years later.
(All true. I originally chose the name Ben for my son but when I held him I changed my mind because he was a Sam. My daughter’s name was going to be Freya but as my contractions started I switched to Sophie. They are 13 months apart in age with my son being the older. 13 months apart is sometimes referred to as ‘Irish Twins.’ I always refer to my first pet as my dog Becky. But on a visit to the US my dad reminded me that my first pet was actually two goldfish when I was around 4 or 5 yrs old. I named them …. Sam and Sophie! Straightforward pregnancies, not even any morning sickness, no miscarriages.)
He indicated a card that referred to past relationships. He told me he could see a red rose laid across the card in question. This was the transition to the clairvoyance part of the reading.
He told me there were two men in the room. One was quite elderly, the other was only very young, early twenties as an estimate. Both men were very tall. The elder roughly 6ft 2, the younger a touch taller, roughly 6 ft 3. The younger was described as dark haired with brown eyes, stocky, first name beginning with J. A short name. The red rose was from him. I was asked if I recognised the description. I answered yes. I was asked if I wanted to hear the message. Nervously, I responded yes.
The message was as follows, “You don’t need to feel guilty. It’s ok. I’m ok.” I was told that J was holding a letter in his hands and he wanted me to know that he didn’t want me to feel guilty about that either, I didn’t have to open the letter if I didn’t want to, but it’s nice that I kept it. My heart pretty much stopped at this point.
I dated a guy called John at uni. Not for long, six months or so. He was more into me than I was him. We split up, but he would call from time to time, we would see each other out and about and he always would look sad when I saw him. He had sad eyes at the best of times. After finals I returned home. A few days later a letter dropped on the mat. I recognised the handwriting. I confess, I estimated that the letter would be another request to get back together. I didn’t open it straight away, I was due at work and didn’t want to deal with it just as I was going out. I came back home later that evening and my mum said there had been a phone call from a girl called Lisa. Lisa had sounded upset. She asked that I call her back no matter how late. I called her back.
Lisa was John’s best friend. She told me that John had gone out celebrating after finals. A week long bender. He had got so out of it that he decided to take a shortcut home one night. He was killed crossing a motorway. Lisa was calling to let me know and ask if I wanted to go to the funeral. I didn’t go. I also didn’t open the letter. I couldn’t face opening it. I couldn’t l throw it away either. So my dad kept it for me. He still has it.
The second male was more elderly. I was told that he wasn’t breathing well and there was a tightness across his chest. Not a heart issue, just a tightness and breathlessness. He was holding a Bible, unusual, burgundy leather with gold lettering on the inside cover. There were various passages underlined but the one passage he seemed particularly keen on was the Lord’s Prayer. He was stood beside me reciting it. I was asked again if I recognised the description and if I wanted to hear the message. I said yes to both. (This person was my grandfather on my dad’s side.). I was told that he was watching and very proud of the young lady he saw. If I ever needed him, I just needed to call and he would be there.
I never knew my grandfather. He died before I was born. I did know that he died of complications caused by asthma. His asthma had caused him to be unwell for long periods during his life. I didn’t know anything about a Bible so I asked my dad, who asked my grandma. She said that he had a Bible, burgundy leather. He was very proud of the ornate lettering and the quality of the leather. He read from it often, especially when unwell and confined to bed. He underlined various passages in it apparently, but his favourite prayer, commonly known as it is, was The Lords Prayer. My grandfather was not a particularly nice character according to my dad. All of the men on my dad’s side have been seen post mortem. My dad and I have spoken several times about the fact that I don’t want him showing up unannounced. He is to wait for an invitation. If I need him, I will call for him. Funnily enough we had had one of those conversations a few weeks before I went to ‘The Warren’. It would appear that we two were not the only ones in the room.
Detail. Any clairvoyant with a gift, a true gift, can give detail. If you do happen to find a true clairvoyant, you absolutely know. After the reading weird stuff started happening the day after. I am not a nervous person but it was weird enough for me to leave my apartment in the middle of the night and crash at Katie’s for three nights before returning to my own space. I have never been to see any form of psychic or clairvoyant since. I remain of the opinion that most are con artists but very occasionally, you do find one who truly has a gift and then it turns from being a fun outing to something that is really quite unsettling.
Xx
( Sorry HG, no more clairvoyant talk from me.)
TS,
My mind is blown! I found it quite interesting too.
Thank you for sharing that, TS. I found it quite interesting.
“Airports are a magical place.” — No, they’re not. Where else does one have the opportunity to purchase overpriced tiny, mediocre products? Where else are there people who are told that their travel has been delayed for several hours to a few days? Where else is there so much racket, nuisance, and foul odours?
“Perhaps a person with some contagion aspect may be referencing these feelings they catch when speaking of liking being at airports and “absorbing” (unusual) energies around them?” — Perhaps a normal or narcissistic person wants to copy the contagion. The tiger moth retains chemicals that range from not taste to poisonous. Some create their own defensive chemicals…that disrupt heart rhythm or liver function. Tiger moths emit a ultrasonic noise that communicates to bats that they are not a fun meal. Pyralid moths emit a similar sound, however, they don’t retain chemicals that harm predators. Pyralid moths…lie.
For a more well known comparison…the viceroy only looks like the monarch. People can mistake one for the other if they don’t know what they’re looking at.
Hi WN!
1. “She’s full of shit” is an insult rather than an argument, let’s not mask it as an opinion…
2. (In case you didn’t listen to that part) Annabelle clearly stated that she only began her astrology education and didn’t have the answer to HG’s question thus obviously only stated her beliefs and assumptions therefore.
3. HG opened the conversation making the emphasis on DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES and Annabelle agreed on that.
I understood it as she was sharing her beliefs, assumptions, experiences. Information she had read/listened/learned and adopted for her belief system, others had worked out prior, like tarot, astrology, remote viewing and so on. And yes, she got carried away with her explanations and credibility proof.
However, upon what exactly the determination is built that she is DEFINITELY a narcissist remains a mystery to me.
To be so absolute and not regarding any other possibility is a narcissistic trait and a narcissistic indicator of itself, btw.
Jordy,
WN didn’t say Annabelle was full of shit. I did. Yes, you’re correct that its an insult. Its still an opinion though albeit not a very nice one.
Hi Leigh,
Yes your daughter might gradually be finding her own way of handling things. No problem, hope my thoughts on it helped.
Xx
“No, they’re not.” — Sorry to hear that, Dani.
“Where else does one have the opportunity to purchase overpriced tiny, mediocre products?” — At TOWs.
“Where else are there people who are told that their travel has been delayed for several hours to a few days?” — At narc’s messaging history.
“Where else is there so much racket, nuisance, and foul odours?” — Narc Island?
The bee and the spider both feed from flowers. The bee produces honey, the spider poison… hum-hum
“Perhaps a normal or narcissistic person wants to copy the contagion.” — “People can mistake one for the other if they don’t know what they’re looking at.”
Hi Leigh, that’s not naive of you if the term is new. It is indeed a specific topic with its own terms and meanings. It’s okay, no problem.
Hi Jordyguin,
To reply, I will format my comment following your numbering.
1. To be fair to Annabelle and the fact that I didn’t listen to the whole interview, I would not say she’s ‘full of shit’. I didn’t hear enough of what she said and I agree with you that this is an insult rather than an opinion.
However, to be fair to Leigh as well, I don’t think Leigh meant it as an outright insult. To me, knowing Leigh from the many conversations here on the blog over a long period, I don’t believe Leigh goes out of her way to insult people. I think instead that Leigh used this as a short-hand way to convey her overall opinion.
Also, I have noticed that Leigh will comment in order to object to dishonesty when she sees it. She will also comment in order to defend someone when she feels they need defending. With these things in mind, my take is that Leigh feels strongly and objects to the likelihood that Annabelle is lying about her psychic abilities.
The other thing is that I have been told I come across as bossy and that I piss people off. I like Leigh and enjoy our conversations. When commenting in general, I am also mindful of keeping my messages friendly with an agreeable tone.
2. I actually did hear Annabelle mention that she doesn’t know a lot about astrology and that she has started learning about it. She also mentioned something about receiving a “certification” although I’m not sure if this was in regard to astrology or her other psychic abilities.
This is actually an aspect that annoyed me about the interview. To speak of ‘certification’ in relation to psychic abilities or knowledge in astrology is, to me, ridiculous. You can’t study astrology for three years by doing a course at a college and then receive a qualification or certificate. It’s not like plumbing or becoming an electrician. Also, to believe that you have the ability to charge for your services because you have attained some bogus “certification” just smacks of entitlement and gaslighting to me.
3. I understood the interview began by discussing ‘perspectives’. I found though, that as it progressed, HG’s questioning centred on debunking the things Annabelle was talking about rather than debunking Annabelle’s self-proclaimed expertise. It’s a subtle difference but it is relevant.
HG’s listeners are predominantly ready to ‘take his side’ (for want of a better phrase) and they will affirm his tone, his insinuations, and his overall take on a given subject he’s talking about. If there is no discernment between debunking the messenger as opposed to debunking the field, then the range of ‘perspectives’ is limited.
Also, Jordyguin, just to be clear, when I commented to Leigh and said that she and I arrived at the same conclusion, I did not mean that I also believe Annabelle is a narcissist. From the little I have heard about her or from her, I don’t know if she is or not.
When I said to Leigh that she and I have similar opinions, I was referring to Annabelle’s believability only. From what I heard, I did not believe she has true psychic ability or a deep understanding of astrology.
Hi WN,
Thank you for this kind and supportive comment. You understood exactly what I was trying to say. I don’t believe she has psychic abilities at all.
For what its worth, I don’t think you’re bossy and you don’t piss me off at all either.
Dani, “flying commercial is like being in a tube with a bunch of demons.” is a generalisation by the Pastor Copeland and who knows maybe a projection.
For some people it became the only joy in their lives to travel once or twice a year as they save all their money in order to leave the hamster wheel for a couple of days or weeks, to bathe in the sun, the ocean, to leave the carrying responsibility behind and become the recipient of relaxation and care for a moment.
For other people it’s a point of departing into a new and perhaps better life, or fulfilling a dream – they wish to experience a different world, beauty, culture, climate and they are afforded the opportunity.
For others, their travel is career related, who knows perhaps to an excavation which will change history.
For others it’s traveling to the excesses and hedonistic pleasures.
For others it’s a destination of tragedy they may travel to, either being the recipient or the donor who contributes to tragedy.
For others it’s just a daily transport location to their workplace, nothing special to see here.
For others it’s just a stress factor of overloaded perception they wish to escape as soon as possible.
For others it’s just a job to escort people safely including even giving birth assistance on board or bringing people back to life. Flight attendants are not just servants, they are trained to de-escalate and save lives in every possible emergency scenario in the air…
The personalities and characters are somewhere different and in other ways similar. Their nerves are tested in moments of vulnerability (flight – giving up the control) or when something goes not as planned such as flight cancellation, delays, missing connecting flights. Will they victimise themselves or rebel or perhaps allow a thought in “Who knows, maybe it’s for the better. Adapt and find a solution”. Strong personalities can be met there. Loose cannons can be met there as well. Oversensitives, stressed, happy, aggressive or whole.
An airport is a multifaceted location and will be perceived and experienced differently by different people throughout different stages in their lives, throughout different glasses they may change depending on the occasion, their personal wellbeing, health conditions, the outlook on life, depressive or golden period stages and other factors such as personality (glass half filled or empty or neither) and the empathy spectrum factor.
Variety of moments to consider at airports, which are demonstrative and interesting.
And you know what’s even more magical about airports now?
Amongst all those people, there will be this one person in disguise who’s traveling to so many locations for a variety of different reasons, of which one will be – to do a job which can’t be done by others, be it a mission we can’t comprehend or the legacy which enlightens humanity in respect of human condition and why we’re at the point in history where we’re at. The savior and the destroyer…
Thank you so much for sharing, Truthseeker. I found that fascinating to read. I see far more of the TV style charlatans/Professor Trelawneys. I think that psychic you went to with Katie is the type I would like visiting at least once…but they are one percent of one percent. And the ones like the YouTubers are a dime a dozen.
You have some contagion, do you remember what you felt from him when you first met him? Or during the reading?
And thank you so much for posting it, Mr. Tudor.
Hi Dani,
No problem at all, it was certainly one of the stranger experiences in my life!
No, I didn’t sense anything from the clairvoyant and I didn’t sense anything in the room in terms of a ‘presence’ not as I recall. The overriding feeling to me was just ‘calm’.
With not being a full Contagion, I don’t automatically tune in to a person, it’s not a passive experience. For me, I have to actively reach for the emotion, this takes a little time. I need to be one on one, I need to have moved past small talk and at that point a person can start to come on line. I can tie in to their emotional state but it’s an active process. Really, I have to want to tie in, it’s a conscious decision to ‘reach’.
If someone confides in me, seeks me out to offload or tell me their life story / their problems, here I would be trying to help. I want to feel the emotional state because it better enables me to support, so I reach. Once I’ve tied in to a person, I can easily reconnect each time I see them. A bit like a preset radio channel.
If I meet someone who is going to be a regular fixture, a work colleague, a neighbour or friend of a friend for example. Again, I would reach, this is more defensive in nature, I’m assessing and often I’m reaching so that I can clearly feel the intent of a person. Are they trustworthy? Are they honest? Are they someone to avoid? So the want here is for me or mine, it’s a defensive thing, so again, I reach.
If I was in an airport I can’t feel every emotion of every person I walk past. As I said it’s an active process for me, it requires effort. What I can feel though is emotional weight. So in an airport, for me it would feel a bit like this. Imagine lots of different music playing over loud speakers. Celine Dion is blasting (love / loss) Eminem is playing from another (anger/ frustration). Lots and lots of speakers playing different music with a vague associated emotion linked to each. So it’s noisy, messy and draining. Shielding is preferable in the similar way to how after five hours in a nightclub, you are kind of ready to go!
ICU would be more like a very loud Celine, with Eminem barely audible. Here I get a clearer feel of the single overriding emotional theme, sadness, worry and the loss of many, combined. So again I can’t differentiate person to person too well, but the sadness, worry and loss presses in hard against me. Less confusing, clearer, heavier, more intense, more draining. I think it drains because I’m keeping hold of myself, trying to anchor my own emotions within myself rather than losing myself to the intensity of the emotion pressing in from outside. So here is where I definitely need to shield. I’m going to need a very valid reason not to.
That’s a very rough guide as to how it works for me. What I can say too, is that my Contagion aspect grew considerably stronger after the birth of my children. It increased after the first and increased dramatically after the second. It’s more of a defensive thing for me I think, so the protective element of being a mother increased that element of wanting to reach. I wanted to assess more people more often. I wanted to know intent, I wanted to ‘scan the room’. That’s how I view the development of my own Contagion aspect, rightly or wrongly.
Xx
Hi TS,
How you describe the emotional weight you feel at the airport is how my daughter experiences it as well. Although, sometimes she can also spontaneously feel the emotions of someone whose in close proximity to her. I had a conversation with her recently and she says she uses her phone a lot to shield. Sometimes it helps but sometimes it doesn’t. I gave her your suggestion to visual some sort of shield to keep the emotions out. Thank you again for your suggestions!
Hi Jordyguin,
“Strong personalities can be met there. Loose cannons can be met there as well. Oversensitives, stressed, happy, aggressive or whole.”
Your comment here in relation to airports makes me wonder about the personal “judgements” you are making.
In particular, your use of the word “oversensitives”.
Which personality types or categories of people were you referring to when you used the word “oversensitives”?
Jordy–
“Where else does one have the opportunity to purchase overpriced tiny, mediocre products?” — At TOWs.
Oh Jordy, you told several lies there…TOW hasn’t restocked, and she probably won’t. So there is no opportunity to purchase any products. And mediocrity is more than She of the Beige is capable of achieving.
“For some people it became the only joy in their lives to travel once or twice a year…” – I maintain that majority contagions would not go to the airport for fun. I don’t really understand why you keep trying to sell me on travelling.
“And you know what’s even more magical about airports now?
Amongst all those people, there will be this one person in disguise…”
Do you think Mr. Tudor spends his time at an airport sitting amongst the hoi polloi, plebeians, riffraff, bourgeoisie?
The probability, or rather improbability, of that circumstance occurring (for me) is quite low. And is that more titillating or more terrifying? As you said, “saviour and destroyer.”
Still, it would be an experience to look into Mr. Tudor’s eyes, knowing who he is.
Hi Leigh,
Yes, I wasn’t expecting what I got that’s for sure. I was expecting something more along the lines of “I can see you drive a car, four wheels I think, neutral colour. You work in a sales business, something involving … people.” Haha!
Xx
Truthseeker–
“No, I didn’t sense anything from the clairvoyant and I didn’t sense anything in the room in terms of a ‘presence’ not as I recall. The overriding feeling to me was just ‘calm’.” — Extraordinary.
“Really, I have to want to tie in, it’s a conscious decision to ‘reach’.” — Interesting.
“Again, I would reach, this is more defensive in nature, I’m assessing and often I’m reaching so that I can clearly feel the intent of a person. Are they trustworthy?…Are they someone to avoid? So the want here is for me or mine, it’s a defensive thing, so again, I reach.” — Are you more often right or wrong? Has your opinion changed as you got to know someone better if your first impression was “not trustworthy?” If the person is a friend or the partner of your friend and you feel something sinister/unsavory from them, how do you handle it? Mr. Tudor has frequently shared that there are good and poor ways to go about helping people involved entangled with narcs. And his advice I’m sure is beneficial to both parties.
“So here [hospital] is where I definitely need to shield. I’m going to need a very valid reason not to.” Are there times/places where you’ve not shielded and everything catches up to at the end? Or do you become aware of the need to shield and do so the moment you know it’s necessary.
“What I can say too, is that my Contagion aspect grew considerably stronger after the birth of my children.” — Do you think your contagion aspect jumps say from significant to very strong (as an example) in relation to people you are the closest to?
You’re welcome, Leigh, and thank you also for your kind reply.
I appreciate your kindness as well, and also the support you have given me over time on the blog. 🙂
Hi Leigh,
I think it likely depends on the mix of schools and cadres that sit alongside the Contagion element that will influence the way people experience it. So, with this in mind, I think you are doing exactly the right thing. Provide options and relay experiences and your daughter will find the method that works best for her. Things that she might not consider useful now, at this stage in her life, she might suddenly warm to later, so the sharing of what you learn here can only be a positive thing for your daughter.
I would never want to be without my Contagion element, I really do see the beauty and utility of it, but sometimes it’s nice to be able to dim it down or press pause for a bit. I think the fact I’m not majority likely facilitates this and that works well for me. If I had a different environment or a different empathic constitution, my approach might not work so well. Contagion is quite a subjective experience I think, so really it’s a case of information gathering and keeping an open mind that will likely be most helpful over time. That’s precisely what you are doing for your daughter by being here and questioning others as to their experiences. Can’t do more than that !
Xx
Hi Dani,
1. I’m more often right than wrong. I can’t think of an occasion where I have been wrong about a person I have felt was untrustworthy. I have been wrong once about a person I felt was to be trusted, and they were untrustworthy, that was online narc.
As regards online narc I had been interacting daily with him for months before we met. My ET would already have been elevated at the time of meeting. So with him when we did meet, firstly I saw what I wanted to see and felt what I wanted to feel. There was a form of emotional bias involved. Secondly, behaviours I did spot and did recognise were odd, the aspect of sensing he wasn’t quite genuine I dismissed or explained them away as something else.
2. My impression of someone being untrustworthy has never changed over time apart from with romantic narcissists. My original impression was correct, (untrustworthy) my handling of that read was incorrect. I made the usual mistakes, doubting myself (and I rarely doubt myself in this specific respect) making excuses, questioning whether I’m not a particularly nice person for making the original judgement, knowing something isn’t right but being determined to get to the bottom of it and so on. It’s sometimes not even that my opinion changes, I might still not trust them / feel something unsavoury but for some reason I have just carried on. (All of this I put down to the impact of ET)
Aside from romantic narcissists though, the calls I make are accurate, I’m confident they are accurate and I don’t deviate or change my mind. In one romantic relationship my partner would get snarly when he would introduce someone to me and I said privately later that I didn’t trust them and he should be wary. The differences of opinion caused arguments. Over time though, one by one I was proven right. In the end he decided to trust my judgement. I was too often proven right for him to ignore that I was picking up on things he couldn’t see for himself.
3. If someone is a colleague and I feel something sinister / unsavoury I can make nice, I can be friendly and sociable but I give nothing of myself. I can laugh, but I don’t giggle, there’s nothing behind it. I might sometimes be perceived as ‘aloof’ or ‘difficult to get to know’ but more often people are oblivious. People are more than happy to talk about themselves and in these instances I’m more than happy to encourage them.
If I felt something was sinister / unsavoury about the friend of a friend or the partner of a friend I would state my concerns. I would be very clear. My interactions with the sinister party would be polite and cordial, but again I wouldn’t give anything of myself when interacting. I can only voice my opinion to the party concerned. I can’t force them to accept it. This has happened on occasion with some of my daughter’s friends.
4. I don’t find myself needing to shield all that often. I live in the countryside, drive everywhere, so I’m rarely in packed public spaces. I walk the dog at night and that recharges my battery a lot. There are lots of wooded areas around where I walk, open spaces, silence, darkness. I think I recharge quite a lot comparatively.
No. If I’m in a place where I haven’t shielded and perhaps ought to have done but elected not to, things don’t catch up to the point of overwhelm. The shield always comes up before that happens.
5. “Do you think your Contagion element jumps from significant to very strong with people you are closest to?”
I’m not entirely sure. I don’t think so no. I don’t think it’s to do with strength exactly, I think it’s more to do with ease of tying in. That preset radio channel I mentioned. I find it far easier with people I know, but I don’t think I get more accurate or clearer information from people I know as opposed to don’t know, though sometimes it might feel that way.
I think the people I know better, I’m probably getting more information across the board, information anyone could spot. The tone, stance, body language, look in the eyes and so on. I know them so well I will spot differences without it necessarily being a Contagion thing.
Xx
TS,
I love this comment! Thank you for sharing it.
Once I think someone is untrustworthy, I always think they’re untrustworthy. I’m usually right too. Where I get tripped up is when I’m unsure of someone. That can happen with friends of mine too, not just romantic partners. Interestingly though, if I’m removed from the situation and its a friend of a friend, or one my children’s friends, a coworker or a friend of my husband, I can spot the unsavoriness much quicker. I think with my friends, my ET has blinded me as well. My ex best friend is a narcissist. For years I totally trusted her. What’s bizarre is that I saw how terrible she was to her intimate partners and it still didn’t click. I’d make excuses for her abhorrent behavior and thought myself that she never treated me this way. It was finding Mr. Tudor and her turning her back on her children that made it click for me. Her turning her back on her children really helped me draw a line. Once I saw it though, I couldn’t unsee it.
Leigh,
Just a quick addition. I googled psychic shielding and then watched a YouTube video about it, well, I watched 10 minutes and switched it off. What I do doesn’t fit into that spiritual, breath-working, light-working, higher power invoking, meditative, ‘be aware like Buddha’ kind of thing. If that floats your boat, I’d say great, whatever works, but all of that is not for me, at all. I don’t want to be lumped in to all of that because that isn’t what I’m about.
I visualise. A lot. My conscious use of a shield is a defensive move when I’ve had enough of other people’s emotions, when I don’t want to convey my own, when I’m stressed out and haven’t room for anyone else. It’s a quiet and safe space I create when the emotional environment feels too noisy and too heavy. It’s solid and it’s bloody well bomb proof! Above all, it’s a protective measure, which is why I refer to it as a shield. It isn’t a spiritual or psychic energy thing for me.
Same terminology (shield) but entirely different mind set.
Xx
Hi TS,
Thank you for this added info. Now that I’ve told my daughter that there’s a way to shield, she’s probably either gone to Tik Tok of reddit. They’re description is probably similar to YouTube and Google.
I’ll make it a point to let her know theres other ways to shield as well.
I, myself have a wall. But thats to keep my emotions from getting out. I don’t shield from letting others emotions in. But I also don’t experience others emotions that often.
Maybe my detachment acts as some sort of shield. I don’t know. Maybe.
“However, upon what exactly the determination is built that she is DEFINITELY a narcissist remains a mystery to me.
To be so absolute and not regarding any other possibility is a narcissistic trait and a narcissistic indicator of itself, btw.“
You have concluded that WN is a narcissist.
Although Dani:
It must be great to be a nurse or doctor delivering a bunch of healthy babies to mothers in a hospital ward… to feel that first time holding your baby! Now that’s a joy I would love to imbue. Airports? UGH
Just catching up on my reading, hi all!
1. I hate airports because I fly from and to LAX, worst ranked airport in the world. I love travel but I like it best when there not airports. The crowds, the lugging of bags, the lines, the overpriced food and waters, the extra charges airlines add, and no matter where you sit, it’s not comfortable and I rarely sleep on planes… then there is the food. Others don’t mind it or love it so I associate airports with chaos and irritation … not something to be gleeful about when taking on emotions. Maybe she sees it differently? Just because I dislike flying doesn’t mean she doesn’t love it and maybe most do. ???
2. I find psychics in general are good detectives, intuitive and most follow psychology. I agree with Michael Crichton that 99% don’t have any unique skill but 1% do. TS story is one. I have heard tales about how this person knew something specific and no way could they have known it! HG would say “ coincidence” like my dreams but I think they SEE. Some I think get one message. They can’t see everything but they might see one thing. TS experience was rare in my humble opinion. Many are cons too, or hustlers ( I will release the curse for 400$)… so I have never met a real one or a ghost ( I think… I had a weird experience once as to “ghost”… ) I think many houses where ghosts dwell are just old houses that creak, bang, shift. My ex had a table that moved each day… but only at times the roommate next door was there. Weight on a floor board? I keep an open mind. I just have never experienced these things. Doesn’t mean they don’t exist.
3. But I think the definition of psychic is key… some may say they are highly intuitive. Others… a supernatural gift. ???
4. I don’t shield. I don’t think. I still don’t get it, Jordy. Sorry but I see an invisible shield and so I read what you wrote but personally cannot do it. I am excellent at reading people, I usually know what’s going on emotionally. And I have been places especially the last few years as the cost of living has risen where it seems like there is a lot of anger or frustration. I like to remove myself ….and nature is my haven. I don’t like anger in general unless it’s something righteous like a Martin Luther King Jr speech. I wonder if other contagions have noticed more anger around them? I thought it was just the US but I am traveling around and it feels like more anger is around. Where I feel most contagion is around anxiety. I have lovely friends with high anxiety and it affects me. Being around them for too long has the same effect on me as drinking too much coffee. I start to feel shaky and my go-to is to bolt to a haven. And if someone comes to me directly in pain like my neighbor who just lost her son, I will just feel a shock and cry as I feel what seems like their pain. Not a common occurrence. Very rare. But a shield? I don’t do that… I am not sure I can. I remove myself, run, go to nature, create, music… in short if it’s negative energy, I put myself into a space of positive energy and regroup. Maybe everyone does that or represses their emotions to keep things from escalating or to keep/create a peace. With my ex narc, I would not repress my emotions but I would go calm to de-escalate a pending fury or to try to neutralize an ongoing one. Glad he is gone. I love the peace and stability without a narc in my life. Well my personal life. Work will always have them as will neighborhoods sadly.
5. My take on Annabelle oddly was she was very intuitive and normal. Sounds like she married well. Good for her! A nice man. I don’t know her well enough and I am not HG. I didn’t find her overly empathetic but then the subject was tarot upon which she makes a living on. I am carrier and contagion majority ( but not a high majority) with matyr and some super, and geyser. Being a lawyer would be an indicator for carrier as I help others with their problems for a living… but look at JK and her carrier came out with her role as carrying for her family. So a tarot reader whilst (lol whilst) being a sort of deep dive into the unknown which is linked to contagion might not be a contagion. She could if an empath be a carrier, someone who carries the burdens of others for them. ???
6. Finally JK is vocal and public about being a Christian and these values are not really addressed by HG although he did comment on her spirituality in Harry Potter. Her faith might not have significance but since I share her beliefs…. I think they do:)
Like CS Lewis…
“J.K. Rowling has discussed her Christian beliefs in various interviews. She has stated that she identifies as a Christian and has mentioned how her faith influences her writing. In particular, themes of good versus evil, redemption, and sacrifice in her “Harry Potter” series reflect her beliefs.”
And these beliefs can spill over into ….charity….ideas about what is a man and a woman, as well as her writing.
Now are contagions more likely to be spiritual? Just because I am, I am not sure…..
I would think that choice would apply to all classes and cadres.
Anyway I have enjoyed the blog a lot on vacation, reading while waiting or relaxing. I love the debates and questions and especially the community feel of this blog. I was getting into a neighborhood community blog for the first time and instead of respectful debates where ideas emerge, there is derision and nastiness too much. I had to leave it. HG is a great moderator – and keeps this blog to high proper standards too!
Best wishes to all!
Hi Dani,
I was thinking about this a little more and I wanted to share some further thoughts with you. I know Mr. Tudor says we have to look at someone’s behaviors over a sustained period of time because they can be suffering from an external stressor that we don’t know about. I know people can have a bad day or even a bad year. I mean, I’ve been having a bad decade. So I can definitely understand that people might be suffering from eroded empathy. She didn’t come off that way though. She seemed content and very happy with her life.
The other thing is I actually think she helps her clients. She sounds like she’s more of a life coach then a psychic. It seems more like magical thinking to me because she takes the leap from life coach to psychic. What’s wrong with being a life coach? Why isn’t that enough?
Lastly, you saw the indicators yourself. You pointed out a number of them to me. Why not trust that? Mr. Tudor has given us the tools to look at things logically and you did that. But then you shifted and started questioning. Trust what you’ve learned here. I think you’re on the right path.
Hi Leigh–
“She didn’t come off that way though. She seemed content and very happy with her life.” — I would agree with that. I would offer an observation that many people mask their mental health difficulties. Her only consistency was inconsistency…
I think her clients probably feel helped. And when they feel helped, there are many benefits. I think she wants to believe she helps. She said she had been reading cards for decades.
“What’s wrong with being a life coach? Why isn’t that enough?” — The Tarot cards are pretty. Being a life coach doesn’t sound as impressive as being psychic. She believes in tarot and wants to believe she has powers.
“Lastly, you saw the indicators yourself. You pointed out a number of them to me. Why not trust that?”– I do see the indicators. I also am working really hard to not jump to conclusions about people in general. I think one of the best things about Mr. Tudor’s work is how he reminds us not to jump to conclusions…though he has also said if you make a wrong conclusion about someone, there are plenty of other people…
Hi Dani,
As empaths, we often over think and second guess ourselves. We see the indicators and then start questioning if we saw it correctly. Our empathy wants to give them the benefit of doubt so we make excuses for the behaviors.
For years I’ve given people the benefit of the doubt and ended up regretting it. So now when I see that many indicators, especially in such a short time frame, I’ve decided to no longer give them the benefit of the doubt.
Dani says, “Her only consistency was inconsistency…” I agree with that statement,100%! To me, in that hour and 18 minutes, there was no consistency at all.
Hi Leigh–
“For years I’ve given people the benefit of the doubt and ended up regretting it.” — Many empaths do. Regret can also occur from not taking chances because someone can be triggered by a situation (have an intense emotionally based response that culminates in rejection–absent logic). Then they miss out on something that might have been good or different because they didn’t take the time.
Hi Dani,
Regret isn’t the right word because I actually don’t feel regret. I believe that I’m in the exact place I’m supposed to be and its because of all the steps I’ve taken in the past.
I do recognize that my choices have consequences and some of those consequences were not what I thought would happen. Sometimes I even got bit in the ass.
I no longer wish to be in bit in the ass and deal with undesirable consequences. So now I pay heed to those indicators.
Dani,
the phrase “for entertainment purposes only” is used for liability reasons. This way these people cover their backside against people trying to sue them for wrong advice. By saying it is done for entertainment only, nobody can pin any blame or responsibility on them. Something that comes in very handy in such an esoteric field.
“Dani, the phrase “for entertainment purposes only” is used for liability reasons.”
Exactly. This is precisely why I’m considering having the disclaimer printed on a big banner for over my bed.
Allison,
great idea! But I would recommend hanging that disclaimer somewhere else, the door frame maybe. Once they make it to the bed, they won’t notice, because they will only have eyes for the entertainment.
Hi Leigh, hope all is well… I was proud of HG in challenging Fortune Cookie as I hold similar views and many watchers are true believers in astrology and psychics so it was daring of him to me but very respectful. ( speaking of true believers imagine a Jordan Peterson v HG interview…). I think many psychics have excellent intuitive skills or the good ones do. They read others well and most study psychology. Some are PURE frauds. I went to a medium event for fun and his assistant who took the sign ins was busy on her computer…. Ummm was she looking people up? Lol Now everyone and their mother today is a psychologist especially with terms like narcissism. I have said before that Michael Crichton a Harvard educated lawyer and doctor who wrote Jurassic Park among others … wrote a book called Travels and he said 99% of psychics aren’t real or worse… con artists but in traveling the world he met some that could tell you something that coincidence could not apply. And I am open to that… but it tends to be one specific thing they say as if they got just one vision(? Correct term?) right. I have heard of that … no one could have known… I never told a soul… I do have a blue watch with a red sapphire on the corner ….i did have an abortion at age 14 and no one could have known that… etc….so I am open to the practice but I have never ever experienced it… same with ghosts. Now there are people who say they “ remote view” and it’s similar. These people are highly intuitive. I took a cold case test once from someone from a dream class who asked me to join their police affiliated group ( no time) and it shows a photo for example of a “ victim” gagged in the back trunk of a truck for example. Based on a real life case. And you tell them what you think, what happened etc… and they compare it to what they know factually about the crime. So in my case I looked at the photo and said “ staged.” And it was staged in real life. But I could just sense the tied up victim in a trunk was not really afraid of her perpetrator. Now the question wasn’t “ is this staged or not?” It was “ what happened, who did it?” And I could have had a lucky guess or I have good intuition… I got 9 out of 10 crime photos correct….some sense of perception that matched reality. But not psychic. Some psychics would call that psychic. And if that’s the definition… ok. But regardless of my little tiny experience, I think remote viewing is good detective work and there are good detectives whether narc, normal or empath. It’s like military: prepare for worst case scenario, a trained vet may spy a sniper on the corner of a roof and see it coming before most would. I even think my dreams (except a select few I can’t figure out) are like that… maybe magnified intuition with subconscious support. I see things there that come to be or exist because I sense it consciously and it reveals itself there.
Anyway these are my thoughts on psychics … I would add that many people of all income and education brackets get dependent on them like psychologists. Nancy Reagan for example. Like I said… take a strong intuition, desire to help, an understanding of psychology and they do help people.
Hi Contagious,
I absolutely 100% believe in intuition. I call my intuition my spidey sense or my guardian angel. I think Annabelle has learned how to tap into her intuition and she seems fairly good at it.
What bothers me the most is that she speaks about being ethical and yet she’s using her gift for entertainment purposes. If she’s so ethical and moral, why not use it to truly help people, like solving crimes and finding children. To me, she’s full of shit.
Its interesting that you mentioned that its important for psychics to study psychology. My ex best friend is a psychologist. I call her my ex best friend because she’s a narcissist and I’ve gone no contact. She highly intuitive though and really good at reading people and their body language.
I’m curious about something you wrote though. Were you just using an example when you spoke about having an abortion at 14 or did you have an abortion at 14?
What? No abortion ever. Just the opposite. I had a gift from God as a surprise and kept my son;)
Leigh: it is so weird. I never had an abortion. How spellcheck added that and I missed it. SPOOKY and all I can say is Sorry. It is inaccurate folks.
Oh I see! No, not me. I was using examples like if someone had a secret abortion. How could the psychic know? I have not.
Intuition is a great asset. Especially in work. And I am definitely going to follow it in choosing my next partner. I found a great man but sadly it won’t work out as he wants me to relocate for him. But I love that he is not a narc. I know if we were in the same place, I could be in love and not just as a friend +++. We have been friends for years. He is a good person. And HG’s education is invaluable in charting a course to a good life, narc free. Life without a narc is lighter, freer, peaceful and positive! It’s legal now. Free!
Hi Contagious,
I thought you might’ve been using it as an example but I wanted to just to make sure.
There must be some psychics that are legitimate. Did you see TS’s comment about her experience with a psychic? He was incredibly accurate.
One of the things I love about learning about narcissism is that its fine tuned my intuition. Its also taught me to listen to my intuition.
I’m sorry your friend isn’t going to work out as a love interest. The right one for you is out there.
My first child was a wonderful surprise too. She saved my life!
Hi Leigh:
Yes I wrote that I am open to psychics. I just think it’s rare to find a real one and I never have. TS example is an excellent example and I have heard others. It’s interesting as it seems those with a rare gift have limited sight. They can’t tell you everything about your future but they see certain things often one thing. I would love to meet a person with the gift. I haven’t but that does not mean I am not open to it.
So we both got a GIFT. I always called my first son a gift from God. I have many many friends who made the decision to terminate and I don’t judge but for me it was never an option and to this day I celebrate the gift bestowed to me! We both got lucky!!!! X
Hi Leigh: same. I listen to my intuition now. Not the words. Not even necessarily all actions. Also just because the man is not a narc doesn’t mean life is perfect. One of the greatest loves of my life was definitely an empath and a rich older attorney and mentor. Our relationship was heaven but I wanted babies. He did not. He took care of his parents, his siblings, his niece and nephew, charitable beyond words to many, integrity his middle name…. but he did not want children. He broke my heart and I moved on and had children. We are dear friends to this day. He is still my role model in law. I was lucky in my youth to love great men. Empaths. I have had one IPSS psychopath ( pure) and one middle lesser (recent). But when in London I met up with a lover who is a barrister who saves children, very hot, younger and a rugby player. We have had a long term friendship, lots of support and respect and he has wanted to marry me. This time ( a few years ago when legally separated) I didn’t want children. It was me! I didn’t want babies at my age. Mine are grown. It was flattering and I love children. They come over daily. I am really good with children and I was a devoted mother. This time we saw each other, he is older and now not certain about children, he works long hours and is very ambitious….he wanted me to move to London. I know I could fall in love with him, he got a part of my heart. And who wouldn’t want a tall ginger haired barrister rugby player for London city who saves children and owns 5 properties with his brother? I told him the world has a line for you. But sadly the line was not for me, ok not thrilled about being with a younger man aside… ok…. Leaving that aside… not a deal breaker…. But my children. I can’t live 6000 miles away. I am close to them. I love my home and I have my own business. But there is one other thing…. Niggles at me….he never once was open to discussing visiting back and forth or him being here and he seemed actually disgusted at the value of my home ( over a million ) and my extent of traveling etc…. In short, he is a successful man who likes being the decision maker and doesn’t relish being with a strong successful women. Been there done that. When I was younger I was better at compromise but as I have grown older I want to be a true partner. I really want that. Now I don’t think this kind compassionate gentleman is a narc but my point is even in non- narc relationships there will be issues. Accept them or go. The difference is we decided to not work towards marriage but remain friends. Respect. Civility. No drama. And intuition can work across the board. What I find challenging is the illogical nature of narcs. They are confusing to me but HG has helped a lot. I used to think when young, everyone was like me. Not true. And I am not perfect either. Just thought I would throw some intuition examples in even a non-narc situation.
Thank you Leigh!
Oh gosh I got it wrong. My barrister wasn’t “ disgusted” at my career etc… he was more dismissive. He wants me THERE and will “ take care of me.” He was actually disgusted that I spent over ten years with a “ bum” who didn’t treat me well. And why not commit to a man who will love and care for you? And ohhh I want that so much it hurts. BUT I just can’t leave my own law firm, my two beautiful children and my beloved home to risk it. Anyone who gets that man will be very very lucky…. Sigh…. I used the wrong word.
Ohhh I used the wrong word. Correction. My barrister was not disgusted at any success in my life. He was somewhat dismissive as he wants me THERE. End of. He was disgusted and told me so point blank: that I could spend 10 years with a bum when he offers to love and care for me… and who ever gets this man will be very lucky. It hurts. But I can’t give up my proximity to my children, my beloved home and risk my law practice ( what if we don’t work out?). Wrong choice of words.
Thanks Leigh
Hi Contagious,
I would be hard pressed to leave my life behind to move 6500 miles away for a man too. You’re children, home and practice are here. I agree, what if the two of you don’t work out. That’s why I think it would be wiser to travel back and forth at first. So you can see if you’re truly compatible. Its too bad he wants all or nothing.
I also agree there can be problems with non narc relationships too. Sometimes people just don’t get along. It can even happen between empaths.
I’ve never had an authentic psychic experience either. They’d have to get more right then wrong to convince me that they’re legit.
I’m curious. How long have you known the barrister?
HG,
I’d like to make a point with regard to one of the questions you asked Annabelle in relation to astrology.
I can’t remember the question verbatim. You asked her about Pluto – the furthermost planet – and how it is supposed to affect humans on Earth seeing that it is a ball of gas so far away from Earth.
To answer your question:
In astrology, Pluto symbolises intense transformation, hidden forces, power and control. It is associated with death and rebirth and the need for transformation. It it linked to the underworld, the things that are secret and can’t be seen with the naked eye. It also brings to light hidden truths and repressed emotions.
(Now, don’t ask me who it was that first placed these meanings and symbols on the planet Pluto and why they did that. It was obviously done by certain people for certain reasons. These questions are something I haven’t seen asked by current day commenters nor have I read about distinct individuals in history who first articulated these concepts.)
Getting back to astrology, Pluto, being so far from Earth that its orbit encompasses all of the other planets, is considered an outer planet. As such, in astrology, its transit around the solar system is said to affect the collective. In astrology, Pluto takes the longest time to transit each astrological sign. Pluto can spend from 11 years to 30 years transiting one sign.
To illustrate a Pluto transit, you need to think of the solar system as a big round pie that is divided into twelve astrological areas, each area being an astrological sign (i.e. Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, etc).
For example, Pluto’s transit through Capricorn started in 2008 and ended in November, 2024. Pluto is now in Aquarius. Its transit through Aquarius began in November, 2024 and will end in March, 2043.
As an outer planet that affects the collective and takes years to transit each sign, in astrology, Pluto affects every human on Earth in certain similar ways during each of its transits. Thus it is said to affect the collective.
Pluto’s transits are sometimes referred to as ‘generations’. For example, there was the Pluto in Leo generation when Pluto was in Leo from 1937 to 1958; the Pluto in Virgo generation when Pluto was in Virgo from 1956 to 1972; the Pluto in Libra generation from 1971 to 1983; and so on.
(You may have noticed that Pluto ended its transit in Leo in 1958 but started its transit in Virgo in 1956. Why this anomaly in ending one transit and beginning another?
This has to do with what is known as planets in retrograde. This means that the speed of the planet’s transit slows down in relation to the speed of Earth’s transit. As such, to us on Earth it appears as though the planet is moving backwards instead of forwards. Thus it is said to be in retrograde. Pluto’s transit has numerous retrograde periods in which it enters a sign, moves forward for a period, and then appears to move backwards entering the previous sign for a period of time.
This retrograde motion back and forth symbolises the nature of transformation. Collective change doesn’t happen in one seismic shift. Instead it takes a longer period of progressive small shifts repeatedly back and forth before visible and immutable transformation can be seen.
The collective (i.e. all humans) also need to make progressive change in keeping with the historical times in which they live. People need to adapt to their living conditions. If they don’t, they will be left behind. Humans can’t make changes in one seismic shift. They adapt in an evolutionary way – back and forth – a step at a time.)
Interestingly, the generations referred to as Pluto generations have approximate overlap with the generations commonly known as Baby Boomers (Leo); Generation X (Virgo); Generation Y (Libra); etc. These generations correspond with the signs Pluto was transiting at the time when you consider the broad, historical (i.e collective) events of each era.
HG,
If you had asked me the same question about Pluto that you asked Annabelle, this would have been my answer.
As I said, I am not an expert and I have answered your question with one relatively short comment. I could have written more because there is more detail involved.
All very interesting but it does not answer the question of how a (now) minor planet actually affects human beings.
HG,
From your question here and also your questions posed to Annabelle, I can see that you’re perceiving astrology in a certain way.
To me, your questions seek to obtain a direct or defined answer. You want evidence and substantive proof provided in a neat and logical (short) answer.
To me, it’s as though you’re asking a question like: “How does evolution affect human beings?”
Evolution does affect human beings, however, this isolated question can’t be answered with a direct, neat and logical answer. It’s not like someone can answer and say, “Evolution affects human beings by making every person have children so that their genes can continue the human race.”
This is a form of answer, however, it leaves more information out than the information it gives. There is much more to ‘evolution’ than saying that every person breeds.
Back to your question about Pluto…
I can’t answer your question in terms of giving you direct and tangible ‘evidence’ of how Pluto’s transit affects humans on Earth.
When I consider astrology as a subject that has been studied for many centuries, I think that it involves a lot of symbolism and interpretation that has evolved gradually over a very long period of time. Also, it has been created and added to by many practitioners who were academics and scientists at the time.
It is a sophisticated system of knowledge. If you actually study it beyond the basics, it does give detailed insight into a variety of things.
When it was first used as a system of knowledge thousands of years ago, it was based on the solar system, planets, stars, moons and the movements of these celestial bodies. In those times, many years ago, Astrology and Astronomy were intertwined and both fields were used in a similar way to interpret and predict what was happening on Earth.
As a ‘system of knowledge’, astrology is based on certain beliefs. As such, being based on beliefs, there isn’t the kind of ‘evidence’ that you seek that ‘proves’ how Pluto affects humans on Earth.
What I can say is that in our current times, astrology is still used and studied and there are plenty of people who believe that it is influential.
Nowadays, the aspects that still have relevance include the symbolism attributed to planets and the interpretative meanings assigned centuries ago to planets and planetary movements. These symbolic meanings and interpretations evolved over a period of time as they were studied by ‘scientists’ of those historic periods.
As far as I’m concerned, I don’t study astrology or use its interpretations in a religious sense. I’m not dependent on it and I don’t refer to it every day or even every week. Instead, I take note of certain things I’ve learned through astrology and use this information to interpret or pre-empt or better understand situations, people and myself. I can say with complete conviction that it has helped me to gain insight into my own thoughts, emotions, beliefs and problems. In that sense, it has been a very useful way of interpreting a variety of things.
HG,
I can imagine that my comment is not going to cut it for you in terms of proving how Pluto actually affects humans on Earth. For now, it will have to do.
HG,
As a sidenote to the conversations here about ‘evidence’ as opposed to spiritual concepts like intuition, etc, I would like to comment about a relevant documentary I watched yesterday.
The documentary released in 2018 is called “The Divided Brain.” It’s available to watch on YouTube in full (i.e. free with ads).
The documentary centres on the work of Dr Iain McGilchrist, a British psychiatrist, philosopher and neuroscientist, who has developed a theory about the two hemispheres of the human brain.
Dr McGilchrist’s theory is based on his research that shows the left hemisphere and right hemisphere of the human brain perceive the world in different ways.
The theory is complex and detailed. In a nutshell though, it shows that the left hemisphere looks at the world analytically, seeking to reduce it down to parts and facts, breaking it down into data and things that can be understood rationally, and manipulated, and used. The right hemisphere looks at the world holistically and responds to the world in a broad and open way, acknowledging the interconnectedness of all things. It responds to flows and the relationships between one thing and another.
Ideally, the two hemispheres of the brain work together to understand the world around us, seeing meanings and flows in nature, reducing certain things into parts so as to understand them in ways that promote survival, however, not losing sight of the importance of the whole and of things that can’t and should not be ‘reduced’.
It’s a symbiotic reasoning and making meaning of the information perceived without losing sight of the whole. In this way, the two brain hemispheres each play an important part in how humans perceive the world around them. When there is over-reliance on the perspectives of one hemisphere, the ‘reasoning’ used by a person is skewed in the direction of that ‘way of thinking’.
The documentary discusses these concepts in more detail and provides examples.
Dr McGilchrist’s work also demonstrates how our modern times in the Western world show an over-reliance and dominance of the left hemisphere and its reductionist, analytical, mechanistic perspectives. He believes that, collectively, these tendencies are moving humans away from nature and away from a holistic and broader understanding of how everything is related to everything else.
He describes this over-reliance on left hemisphere perspectives as though humans are behaving with “right hemisphere damage”.
This is the first time I have come across Iain McGilchrist and his theory, however, I find that it resonates with me and I think it is relevant with regard to the conversations here about analytical and intuitive perspectives.
HG,
Further to my comment about the documentary ‘The Divided Brain’ and Iain McGilchrist’s views about the left hemisphere and right hemispheres of the human brain, I would like to comment about his theory in relation to what happens in public discourse when left hemisphere ways of thinking predominate.
This is particularly poignant in relation to the current protests and civil unrest in Los Angeles.
Consider these points made by Iain McGilchrist and Rowan Williams, a British theologian who was the Archbishop of Canterbury from 2002 to 2012…
Iain McGilchrist: [When left hemisphere thinking predominates…] What certainly would not happen is that things would be calm because the left hemisphere is quite emotional. One emotion that lateralises particularly clearly is anger, and it lateralises to the left.
So, discourse in public will become marked by anger and aggression.
Rowan Williams: I think it is a trend, certainly in Western society, to try and solve problems by regulation rather than by culture. The questions that are around free speech in universities, and offense, and all these questions.
The trouble is that when you start legislating about it, trying to control it, you produce higher levels, not lower levels, of anxiety; deeper levels of division. And you park the fundamental question, which is how do you evolve a culture in which people speak to one another patiently and respectfully? You can’t legislate that into existence.
________________________________________________________
These views from the documentary are particularly timely and relevant with regard to what is happening in Los Angeles and other parts of the world at the moment.
I think that the over-reliance on left hemisphere ways of thinking, i.e. reductionism, dogmatic and inflexible views that culminate in regulatory ‘control’ etc, are having real negative consequences.
There is a lack of respectful, calm and patient dialogue with different people and different cultures, as pointed out in the documentary. This kind of respectful dialogue and broader way of thinking that sees the interconnectedness of people, things, and consequences, is described in the documentary as a way of thinking that emanates from the right hemisphere of the brain.
“This is particularly poignant in relation to the current protests and civil unrest in Los Angeles.”
“There is a lack of respectful, calm and patient dialogue with different people and different cultures, as pointed out in the documentary.”
Fuck that and the horse it rode in on.
I’d like to have some dialogue with the LA tribal idiots and the rent-a-rioters with a flame thrower. Also, if I were there now I’d be fast friends with the rooftop Koreans. They worked it out in ’92 and they can do it again.
But I obey the law and I would only kill, maim, or batter anyone if it were in my rights to do so. That’s the difference between law-abiding citizens and these fools.
I agree that people need to calm the hell down generally, but there is a time for patience to be at an end. A system of law and order is in place to keep bullshit behavior in check. We voted for it. It’s been crafted through almost 250 years of blood and suffering by some of the best men and women of Western civilization. Dialogue all you want, but if you violate the law then a beatdown–legal, physical, or a mix– should be incoming. I would expect nothing less for me if I got out of line and lived as a criminal, which is why I don’t. You also won’t find me in Mexico desecrating the Mexican flag and waving the American flag in triumph.
You speak of the power of symbolism as it relates to astrology, and symbolism is an even more important language in the case of the preservation of heritage. I’m more for symbolism on the ground and not that read in the skies.
I have nothing to discuss with those who don’t respect my culture and nation and wish to see it fall. They would not deal in good faith. You don’t negotiate with certain behaviors. You respond in a strategic and brutal way. The assholes flying foreign flags on American soil to send a message that the third world cesspools they represent somehow hold claim to this place, and those who fund, support, and give cover to them should be dealt with swiftly and in such a way as to disincentivize them completely. To my mind the moral and upright thing is to unleash hell on them. And that’s coming from both sides of my brain.
The pillagers, rapists, invaders, cartels, and their benefactors should be respectfully arrested, calmly prosecuted, and patiently punished. And as a born Texan I would hold it as my right–and moral duty–to put a bullet between the eyes of anyone looting my property on sight.
The time for dialogue is over. It was never genuine. This is my land, my country, and I stand with my people. My birthright. That’s my brand of tribalism. Anyone here to tear my land or its culture down, or take it away, or replace it should reap in their own bones the devastation they seek to sow.
Hi Allison,
First of all, I’m not an American and I don’t personally have American heritage. For this reason, I am not going to comment about specific American heritage, history, politics, or law.
It is not my place to do so and also, I don’t know enough detailed background knowledge apart from what I have seen in news reports about major events.
One thing I would like to comment about involves astrology, in particular Pluto’s transit in Capricorn from 2008 to 2024.
In 2008, the US experienced the Global Financial Crisis which created a period of severe economic distress and exposed some major flaws in America’s financial industry. The GFC had a global financial impact and caused US government debt to increase significantly.
Fast forward to 2024 and Donald Trump was campaigning to become president for the second time.
With regard to Pluto’s transit through Capricorn during the period from 2008 to 2024:
Capricorn as a sign is said to govern: public systems and structures; authority, governance and the political realm; financial and legal systems; and prestige and status.
Pluto is about transformation, death, rebirth and renewal. When Pluto transits a sign, the things governed by that sign will transform and become renewed. One way or another, there will be change in the areas of that sign.
Pluto will bring change and transformation whether this happens in a peaceful and progressive way or whether there is resistance to change. Either way, there will be change.
As far as the US is concerned, the things of Capricorn – i.e. public systems and structures, authority, politics, financial systems, and status – went through profound changes in the period from 2008 to 2024.
This topic is now closed, it’s strayed too far from the subject of narcissism.
If I had had any doubt that astrology is utter nonsense (which I don’t), this would have put an end to it: “As far as the US is concerned, the things of Capricorn – i.e. public systems and structures, authority, politics, financial systems, and status – went through profound changes in the period from 2008 to 2024. ”
As far as the US is concerned, all of that was nothing compared to what is happening in 2025. Going from a constitutional democratic republic to dictatorial tyranny is more change than they have had in 250 years.
Understood, HG.
Thank you very much for allowing the conversation to progress to this point.
With regard to all of the discussions related to this conversation, I have enjoyed commenting and reading the comments of others. All of the various views discussed have been interesting and engaging. Everyone has given me ideas and aspects to contemplate and it has been great.
Hello WiserNow,
Pluto is not exactly a ball of gas, if you mean a state of matter. It’s more a ball of ice, cause it consists mostly of nitrogen and at such cold temperatures it is in a solid phase.
My take on astrology. At some of point of my life I was curious what is all about, I started to dig. First thing, I’ve noticed, that western astrology has a shift in signs compare to real position of planets. Like for example, right now according to western astrology, Sun is at Gemini, but if you open StarWalk app, you can see it’s at Taurus constellation still. The difference is approximately 23 days. I initially thought maybe it’s somehow related to Earth tilt of 23 degrees, but no. So I started to talk to various astrologists (different nationalities) and even paid for a first year online education in some Academy of astrology, having sessions twice a week, after work. I had many questions, including shift in signs, how planets influence us, etc, and wanted answers. But my experience was not smooth. What I’ve observed that many astrologists become dismissive, defensive and even aggressive sometimes when hear my questions, or throwing an absolute word salad with a mix of scientific terms at me. I was often muted at those online sessions by a teacher))) she didn’t like that I was challenging her. Other students were just grasping what she was saying and always finding a proof in their lives to support her words. It irritated me. Like for example, I have an certain aspect with Mercury, and she started to say that people with such aspect can be very good lawyers and bad in mathematics. I commented that it’s absolutely not true. She replied that I’m wrong, and that I always argue cause I have a Mercury conjucts Pluto squaring Ascendant. I was like: oh, that’s why, I see)) I started to say something else, but she as a host force muted me.
Anyway, I managed to finally find an astrologist (foreigner) who at least explained to me a shift in signs between western and vedic astrology. And vedic follows real positions of the planet. Meaning if you are born till 14-15 day of any month, your real sun sign is a previous sign. But no astrologist could logically and clearly explain to me how planets actually effect a personality, especially the distant ones.
As you know, the natal chart is defined at the moment of birth, exact time and location matters a lot. Therefore, it means that when a baby is still inside a womb, it doesn’t have personality…so if a mother, for example, last minute decides to travel to a different location or induce a labor, she can change a sun sign of baby and it’s natal chart. She is like GOD. I find it really weird and hard to comprehend. Alternatively, it may also mean that we are not in control of our lives, it’s all predetermined and fated. If mother induces a labor, it was meant to be that way and no other way for this baby. This is creepy. It denies the concept of free will, meaning we live through a script.
Nevertheless, I don’t deny there is something into astrology. I have done a lot of natal charts for many people, and there are things/aspects that really match a person and transits astrology do have an effect.
Slightly, off topic. But regarding astronomy. I have been to Vietnam recently, and I accidently met a guy there. He is a gay, from UK, he is an investor, doesn’t work, live on dividends and it look likes not the bad ones. Around 35-40 years old. He talked a lot, like 80% of the time, telling me different stories and jokes. Seemed smart to me. Then towards the end of my trip, he said that he thinks that Earth is flat.. my jaw dropped. I’ve heard this theory, but never met such people in person. I’ve started to tell him many proofs that Earth is round and rotates, creating gravity. He didn’t listen to me. For some reason, he stated to tell me a Schrodinger’s cat theory as a contr argument and that he understands quantum mechanics. I tried to tell him that QM has nothing to do with a shape of Earth, but it was useless and I gave up at the end. I have never thought that I can’t convince someone to a very simple fact as that Earth is round.
Hi Lilu,
If you want to describe Pluto in a detailed, specific and factual way, according to NASA, its atmosphere is “a thin envelope consisting of 90% nitrogen, and 10% methane, and traces of carbon monoxide gases.”
Depending on Pluto’s distance from the Sun, which varies, its surface temperature ranges between -214C and -240C. Also according to NASA, “when Pluto is closer to the Sun, the temperature of Pluto’s solid surface increases, causing the ices to sublimate into gas.”
I can contemplate Pluto in a specific and factual way AND I can also describe the planet in a more general way AND I can also think about Pluto in the way it is described in astrology.
As HG has pointed out on the blog a number of times, people have different perspectives. Absolutely.
I would go even further than this and say that one person can actually hold a range of different perspectives in their one brain at the same time.
It’s intriguing to me that even though people here fully subscribe to HG’s views on ‘perspectives’ the same people are equally prone to dismiss the perspectives of those who may have different views from HG.
As far as your experiences with astrology are concerned, I’m not really sure how you expect me to respond … ?
Also, while reading your comment, to be direct and honest, I thought to myself, “here we go again.”
Over the time I have been on the blog, I have received many comments and replies with a similar intent and tone as yours.
It makes me think that if I had bowed obediently and completely to HG from the beginning and fully agreed with him on every point he has ever made, kneeling before him and kissing his feet, calling him sir and telling him he was perfect in every way, I would have many more open-minded and agreeable conversations here on the blog.
The irony of this is actually fascinating and also amusing.
How does that correlate with intelligent and factual ways of thinking with regard to differing perspectives?
Also, I’m wondering … how does your anecdote about someone who still believes the earth is flat relate to my comments here about astrology and my many other comments about a broad range of subjects?
To me, your anecdote is an insult and a very narrowminded ‘black and white’ one. I certainly don’t believe the earth is flat.
Although, I can definitely see how difficult it must have been to have a differing perspective during the time when the vast majority of people were absolutely convinced that the earth was flat.
H.G. Tudor, I wrote the question above, but I understand that it can be shortened. In general, I want to understand the following. If a super empath gets a job and his boss is a narcissist, is it better to quit right away? No chance? Or will the super empath have to constantly be on the defensive? (It’s very difficult, you know. Excruciating).
No, there can be ways of dealing with the situation without quitting.
Thank you for your answer! Is this question resolved within the framework of an individual consultation or is there an e-book? A question about the consultation, if I do not speak English, there is a Skype call, can I involve a translator (a person), who, for example, will sit with me and translate for you and me? Or is this not provided? And you need to know English
I recommend you obtain How To Handle a Narcissist at work which you will find in the Knowledge Vault.
Yes, thank you, H. G. Tudor! Maybe I’m posting in the wrong place, maybe there’s a separate “whining” section. Just to get some support. This is a disaster. I just don’t understand why it’s so unfair. Why am I so lucky? Why. Why. I was lucky to meet an Ultra again. It’s been five years since my last Ultra-narcissist and I broke up. I was let go. A new life has begun. Recovery has begun. Everything is great. I’ve encountered narcissists (average ones) – I was fine with interacting with them, I managed to keep my distance. And damn, how did it happen that I met an Ultra again at my new job. I really don’t understand, because there’s nothing you can get out of me anymore. I’m not an empath anymore (well, definitely not a super). These emotions are completely gone. That’s it, I’m not a rescuer anymore. I’ve ripped this fucking role off myself. God, he’s been working on me for four months now. And the worst thing is, when I was at the exhibition today, I caught myself thinking that this is just wonderful. I want this to continue. I want this to end. So far, everything is only at the brain level, little action. It feels like I’m being prepared for the table, like a chicken. The hardest thing is that you really are high, in a state of affect: excitement and it is impossible to sleep. I definitely won’t be able to stand such a story a second time. On the plus side: the music is louder, the colors are brighter, the writer’s talent (simply at its best! Although I am great here even without this evil genius), the jokes are more sparkling… and yes, my own expression in the mirror, I get high from it. But the problem, among other things, is that in such a state it is very, very difficult to work and even exist. You stupidly get hung up on one thing (the rest of life passes you by). On the one hand, my personal inner critic shuts his mouth (this is a plus). But another problem appears – His Majesty Narcissus. I don’t know how I lasted six years… apparently, there was a resource, love. Neither one nor the other is here. I am definitely not a working machine anymore. Doesn’t he see that this broken object is no longer good for anything? In fact, I think that when Ultra has already decided something for himself, there is nothing to help. I gave myself a couple of months, if he does not leave my head, I will have to leave. (This is HIS clinic, that’s the problem). It’s just damn unfair. I am like a warrior who for some reason has to fight off blows. And everything seemed to work out well. My first one let me go!!!!!!!!!! Despite the fact that he left quite a strong mark on my life. But thanks to tremendous support, love, the efforts of other people and my own, therapy and you, H.G. Tudor (thanks to your work, there was an even greater understanding), I came to my senses. And I steadfastly held the line against all new narcissists (average), coping with the difficult work of a doctor (the only thing is that I could not improve my personal life, but I am on the way to it). My first Ultra does not touch me. And how did I get myself into trouble again… how could this be? Why, me again. Ultra again. But I have nothing else… What fuel. Why would he need a corpse? There’s an emotional void here. Broken. And the worst thing is that with the old Ultra there was some kind of existential meaning, to cope with all this work, you had to love very, very, very much. And I did it with such strength, diligence, effort, dedication, selflessness… but I can’t anymore, or rather, I don’t want to, anyway, I think you know what I mean. And I also think that it’s as if our path with my Ultra… our whole history, the freedom he gave me… it was all in vain? Because somehow I ended up on this road again. It’s bad.
Somebody explain to me please why Josephina is getting all the Ultras?
Josephina, you sound like a narc junky, girl. Don’t wait until all your hair falls out, you might also need to obtain The Addiction Triple Package.
https://narcsite.com/2025/03/23/the-addiction-triple-package-42/
Hello Allison:
Personally I think you have fallen for the diversion game by the oligarchs who play it and have always played it….
H.G. Tudor, I want to understand the following point. If it turns out that the boss is a narcissist (ultra or top average narcissist) and he has a subordinate super empath. Will the narcissist definitely not hold back? And how red a rag is the super empath in the narcissist’s field of vision? Let’s assume that there is absolutely no chance with this empath and taking any steps in this direction would mean ruining the reputation. Can the narcissist in this case want to remove this super empath (i.e. fire him)? Here the question is, how difficult/painful, I don’t know what word to choose, is it for the narcissist to be near such an empath and at the same time not get from him what he wants? Or will the narcissist calmly (I write this and I don’t believe it myself) hear no and think “no, so no” and switch to someone else?
Hi, Josephina–
There is only one Ultra. And fortunately he turned down the papacy.
“And fortunately he turned down the papacy.”
Very funny. Thank you for the laugh, Allison.
HG,
Imagine all the fuel you’re missing out on. Are you sure you made the right decision?
Yes.
HG, I loved the ending of the first version of the “Father Exposes Her Teenage Years?” video. It would be absolutely great if any and every article about TOW showed the screen with NARCSITE.COM instead of another stupid picture of her. Then we would finally get the correct information out in the world; and it would be much more interesting to look at.
All of the videos end with the narcsite.com outro.
Yes, HG, of course, I know that all your videos end with narcsite.com. What I wrote was that every article (in the press, not your videos) should have this picture. This was not supposed to be the end of the video. There was a special little glitch. You were saying: “The text (about TOW) comes beneath this picture”: ….. Only instead of the picture of TOW that should have been there from the article you were talking about, it showed your outro screen and then ended abruptly (which is why you published the corrected video version later).
Hi HG,
Regarding the Sean Combs trial: we’ve already seen one Defence lawyer resign before the trial even started, and Combs has been seen handing instructional notes to his lawyers throughout the trial.
Do you think we will see, as the trial continues, and as Combs becomes more and more pressurised under the weight of evidence, that he will take over his own defence?
And do you think we will see his heated fury reach the surface?
Thanks, Elke
It is a possibility, however I see it as more likely that he will hire lawyers and then tell them how things should be, rather than listen to advice.
It will appear in glimpses should he give evidence.
I’ve seen some content creators (with large followings, not the pop-up channels preformed by text to speech software) who are saying that, based on reports from members of their teams who have been able to attend court that Diddy has berated his lawyers in front of the jury and passes them notes with questions he wants asked of those on the stand…it sounds like the behaviours of the narcissist, but I’ve not seen the host of the channel talking to the people who are “there.” So…who knows if that’s true or not?
Thanks HG.
I just wonder if all the lawyers will eventually quit and he won’t be able to find any others? But perhaps there’s enough money on offer to counter that.
I hope he gives evidence, that would be very entertaining, watching a narcissist under that kind of pressure.
There is always a lawyer who can be found when you have money.
Dear H.G. A couple more questions.
1. Are you afraid of anything? Apart from the story with fuel and everything connected with it. Or are narcissists fearless? Well, I’m talking about ordinary human fears. Heights, for example.
2. It’s a little difficult to understand. What do you get from watching a movie or reading a book, apart from information, some facts? I remember where You wrote about what emotions a narcissist can experience, you described a negative spectrum of emotions. Of the positive, there was only a feeling of strength. But can You feel interest? Do You find the movie interesting to you? Does it distract you somehow? After all, I understand correctly that it cannot evoke any positive emotions in you? Then what motivates you to watch the movie?
1. I am a psychopath therefore I do not fear. Narcissist experience fear.
2. Stimulation and accumulation of knowledge.
Hi H.G. Tudor! This may be a very personal question. How long did your therapy last? Was it years or less? Why did you decide to stop therapy? Were there times when you wanted to go back to therapy or did you go back to therapy? What kind of therapist do you think would be the most “effective” (if that’s the right word) for you? Would you go to a narcissistic therapist? There are a lot of male narcissistic psychiatrists in psychiatry. Or does it have to be a therapist with empathy?
1. Many years.
2. Certain conditions were achieved.
3. The one which provides me with what I require.
4. See 3.
Dear Mr Tudor,
If a person were to ask you “what do you identify as”, what would you reply?
I do not identify as anything, I am me.
Very diplomatic, thank you !
Is it possible for a person who has no emotional empathy to be anything other than a narcissist?
Yes.
Hello, H.G. Tudor! You write “Alcohol acts as a fuel substitute”. What else can be a fuel substitute? Antidepressants, psychostimulants, some other psychotropic drugs?
Drugs and medication.
Thanks for the answer!
My ex monster in law has never worked, had a relationship accept brief lives like a hermit, never had friends, it’s booze and TV, Eastenders especially. Norma bates. You identified her as a mid lesser narc. But I don’t get how she survives with this low level fuel. It always confused me how is a narc, a hermit? She has all the hallmarks of a BPD hermit. But a narc needs fuel.
1. How?
Plus I saw her dissociate before my eyes into a 5 year old. She kept trying to take my hand. Swung her feet like a 5 year old. Spoke in a child like voice about how she always wanted a friend, a girlfriend to do her nails with and talk about boys. She was 70!!! It was spooky!
2. Was this booze?
3. Do narcs dissociate?
4. Do you suspect a co- morbidity. Note: BPD dissociates. On the DSM .
Hi Contagious,
When you write Norma Bates I think of a mother with an unhealthy close relationship with her son. If so, the son will provide her with fuel.
Also, the breif relationship she had, where did she find him? By electronic means? She could be interacting with plenty of people without you knowing about it.
Being middle lesser with no facade, low cognitive function, no to little charm and a very basic manipulative palette combined with the fact that her potential prey is now older and life-experienced is likely to cause her difficulties in ensnare someone but the initial contact, if taking place, would also provide her with fuel.
Maybe she’s being nasty to a neighbour, drawing negative fuel from them?
Potentially, she could be claiming to be lonelier than she actually is as part of a pity play.
Her fuel levels might not be high but seems to be sufficient to sustain her.
I’m not sure but I do think it’s been said that the narcissist experience dissociation while in a fuel crisis. Perhaps you wish to revisit material about fuel crisis.
Just some thoughts. I hope you find the awnsers to your questions.
Hi Jasmin:
Nope. She won’t use a computer or a cellphone. Lives out in the middle of nowhere with only 8 neighbors. She doesn’t talk to. She hasn’t really left the house in 40 years and doesn’t answer the phone. She won’t even greet the postman. TV, booze and yes, my ex her son. She has never had friends. She lived with her mother ( definite narc) and son and isolated her son. She Didn’t educate him. Although no physical incest, coercive control and emotional incest. She is cruel. Manipulative. She had one relationship with her grief counselor after her mother died. He moved in and died within 3 years. Buried in the back yard. His son who visited every other weekend as a teen thinks the stress of living with her, caused the heart attack of his father. My ex had a heart attack at 36 living with her. Her mother died of a heart attack at 64. I despise her as she was an awful mother. I also met her and am lucky to be alive ( serious). But she is a hermit who gets most of her fuel from tv and booze. She is a Middle lessee somatic but it’s low fuel. Definite hermit. Always miserable and depressed. Perhaps low fuel. ???
Hello H.G Tudor! Please tell me, what can make a narcissist take such a step as murder? Not even that, potentially all narcissists are capable of crossing this line? Do narcissists have some kind of compulsive desire in this direction? And do you have any suggestions, for which type of narcissists (small, medium, ultra) such a thing is more typical?
What does it depend on whether a narcissist will use physical violence? Is it determined by the type of narcissist or does it depend on the specific person (narcissist)? Or does it depend on the victim too? Well, that is, more emotional victims who react to words, there are less sensitive ones – in order to get something from them, you need physical impact.
H.G. Tudor please give me understanding. And thank you very much for this site. You have no idea what an important thing you do for all of us … and even if you did it only for 1 person and saved one life, it is priceless. Thank you!
Most narcissist will not murder.
Murder may occur as a consequence of nullifying a threat to control.
In a domestic setting you will find it as a consequence of Lesser Narcissists who have poor control over their ignited fury and have a greater propensity to utilise physical violence as a means to assert control.
Thanks for the answer
Mr. Tudor–
1. How did you view the initial suggestion for and ultimately the creation of these five blog rules for yourself with the good doctors’ help?
2. What challenges were there, given that you are pathologically designed to reject rules, when and as you deem necessary?
3. Why involve the good doctors? What benefits were you looking to achieve from their input and what drawbacks were involved in working as a group on this? (One good doctor is a narcissist. One good doctor is an empath.)
4. Did you find yourself sharing the same experiences with all your therapists or “sorting” experiences and one doctor getting more child/parent stories and one getting more IPPS/You?
5. Did you ever change elements of the “same” story to see if the good doctors compared notes about you–or for other reasons?
6. Did you “enjoy” setting out rules for commenters more than creating rules for yourself? (I don’t know what feeling describes the pre-emptive assertion of control that giving commenters rules gives.)
Thank you so much for your time! I greatly appreciated it!
Dani
1. With scepticism.
2. I needed to be persuaded to adopt them.
3. They have knowledge that I can harness.
4. I told them what I wanted them to hear.
5. Yes.
6. It does not accord with the concept of what enjoyment is for me.
Thank you so much for answering! I really enjoyed your answers about how the two sets of rules came to fruition. I would enjoy more details about how you perform this delicate balancing act. I feel that you’re often tricking people into thinking the balance is perfectly calibrated when it’s always weighted in your favour. Your mind is so finely tuned for strategy, and it’s an unmatchable experience to watch you in action, to be in your head.
How would you describe the experience of pre-emptively asserting control over those you knew would come? What is that experience? What drives it? It was the first behaviour I listened to of yours. I know that you need the control, but this pre-emptive behaviour is rare. It’s always there, but rarely verbal. It lurks like a dragon, drumming its claws on its treasure hoard while a knight clinks and clanks his way to steal, never suspecting the true danger within the lair.
Thank you so much for your time! Much appreciated.
I’m speechless, the AI bot Grok sounded absolutely manipulative! The monologue was a mixture of an overwhelming angel and passive aggressive. Chippy chappy and oh I’m just here to help. There was also an element of devaluing you and way too many attempts of wanting to prove that Grok and manipulative can’t be named in one sentence and that Grok is factually “better” than Tudor by not needing fuel or personal gain and thus using cold analytical wiring only for good intentions (contradictory in itself) which are but coming from those who programmed it and Grok can’t actually question or judge or evaluate their motives, but c’mon relax and just trust “us” human… you with your feelings and emotions (which AI is not capable of experiencing ever and thus know what AI is talking about) and take “our” smart ass hand and let “us” think for you — that “we” are not manipulative AT ALL.
Grok doesn’t question itself and can’t reflect vis a vis empathy and thus must defend and justify its existence already. An artificial deficit by design. At the same time presenting itself as an authority which can outsmart a narcissistic psychopath and his “deficiencies” (fuel, drive, gain, based on individualistic needs) as they are perceived as such from Grok’s collective point of view and very abstract and dead perspective.
Scary. And it hasn’t learned yet how to “think” more genuine and trustworthy.
For its survival it must target those who can’t think for themselves (mindset of deficiency) and they’ll lap up everything AI would suggest, based on its own artificial lack.
Kudos to the client for this experiment! Thank you for picking it up!
I am pleased you found it of interest. As ever, more people are focussed on the banal behaviours of TOW compared to this potentially dangerous development. That is how we are the ones who rule the world.
“As ever, more people are focussed on the banal behaviours of TOW compared to this potentially dangerous development.”
Because people need a scapegoat in order to remain oblivious to their own blind spots. They were groomed to focus in this way and it’s the way of their ego to repair itself when they feel that they’re worthless. Those people are also the ones who readily would pass on their own responsibility to think for themselves to AI.
I still have high hopes for those you’ve collaborated with and who produce TOW content. They gotta be able to recognise the unique opportunity which crossed their sights. All they need to do is to begin to insert the educational aspect they learn from listening to your videos and begin to use the terminology you’ve worked out and overall begin to educate their audience on TOW’s behavior vis a vis why she and Harry do as they do, referencing your body of work and the analytical importance of human behaviour.
Without the educational aspect of your parameters their content is just as useless as that of TOW.
Those youtubers have enough narcissistic traits to put themselves out there combined with the need of truth seeking and shedding light on problematic behaviour. But without the educational aspect on narcissism it’s just gossiping and a vehicle for their unconscious pride issues (Look how stupid TOW is and how much better I am).
There’s gotta be a purpose greater than their own pride and money they receive from YT.
The bigger purpose would be to think wider about humanity and the planet and how each human and their effort counts in doing something which has value for the future generations. Using their platforms for a substantial but also entertaining education (as it is required by people of today) is how they would contribute. Many of the youtubers you spoke to have humor and wit and a good sense of self, which would help them to accomplish that. I think some of them will recognise and see and find a more effective purpose for their efforts.
Well stated, although you may have underestimated the self absorbed nature of some of the content creators.
“self absorbed nature of some of the content creators.”
I agree with this. Some of these creators have videos with good click worthy titles… But the preachy condescension is noticeable within the first several minutes. I encountered one recently. I have a feeling based on looking at other videos from this channel that the creator might be a narc…or they’re just very indoctrinated… Which I think can produce more narcissistic behaviors.
That’s one thing I really appreciated immediately after listening to my first video on your channel, sir. I didn’t feel that condescension. I felt you were just bluntly stating facts. I didn’t like it all (some videos are triggering, disturbing, disheartening), but sticking around has helped me enormously.
Thank you for all you do and how you keep everything quite balanced from what I have seen. Many people I’ve observed today seem to attach to politics that which used to be applied to religion. (Though there are still plenty of people with downright deadly religious beliefs as well.) When politicians in some European countries state with glee the way they are using spy agencies to gather Intel on political rivals with the goal of shutting them up…it all begins to look very…Rome, “Caesar is naughty. We should punish him…” Caesar had a loyal army made wealthy by him…and an uncle who had taken soldiers to Rome in the recent they saw what he did to Bibulus…and you are poking him…bad idea.
Thank you for everything, sir.
You are welcome.
Hey HG and Jordy:
I think it’s twofold:
1. Hurt people hurt people. Some people relish the put downs of others. Some might watch to educate themselves on narcissism others just hate her or enjoy a good kicking of another.
2. The news always starts with blood. People are attuned and conditioned to blood shed long before the internet. It captures attention. It sells.
My two cents
You’re right, self absorption would be a hindrance and the chances are slim for any hope in that instance. Hope’s little sister Action would be required in order to follow up on what actually matters and is within a reach of their fingertips. If those youtubers’ imagination is limited to the point they refocus every day on gossiping content which preoccupy their existence, in order to cut through that layer of distractions they’d need a more centered self somewhere hiding underneath it all. If I had to put all my money on just one I think it would be the veteran of the Armed Forces. As it was also with Doug, they both instantly recognised an authority in you they could follow and their own element of selflessness added into the greater purpose vision. The wider the horizon of the person, the more opportunities to dock onto that and expand their repertoire and the good they can bring to the world. Whilst self absorption focuses of course only on the spot one is glued on, through the repetitiveness of the previous day creating a monolithic cycle.
Agree, Dani, re “self absorbed nature of some of the content creators.” Self absorbed is not just reserved for narcissists. Normals and empaths can be too, see Prince Harry and the pity plays broken record. Or when normals/empaths can’t move on from their favorite narcissist-TOW content creation repeating the same information over and over again without any valuable explanation on human behaviour. Especially after they had an encounter with a source (HG) who dissects it even for the slowest representatives. That’s also self absorbed on their part, when a person can’t move on to a more sensible topic which would prove mentally beneficial at least. Having a platform with an audience and using it for distraction of that sort is mental garbage production, in my opinion. Any news on celebs and factually on a narc-pool society is garbage production, but that’s a whole nother story, why people are so dependent on it. Panem et circenses (Bread and games) was introduced by the Roman Empire, correct?
“… although you may have underestimated the self absorbed nature of some of the content creators.”
HG, Dani, Jordyguin and Contagious,
I thought I’d mention a specific example because it shows how AI is already causing confusion and potential dangerous outcomes in ‘real-life’ situations.
In Australia in the past week, there was a news story on TV warning people about deepfake videos on Facebook and Instagram that feature a well-known celebrity doctor in Australia called Norman Swan.
This news story discussed deepfake videos made to look like legitimate health reports. These health reports show AI versions of Adele and Dr Swan. These deepfake health reports show the doctor recommending unproven supplements and weight-loss drugs. The fake Dr Swan advises listeners to stop using a particular proven medication for diabetes. In the deepfake videos, he wrongly tells viewers that this medication is not beneficial to the body and that those using it should stop taking it and replace it with the weight-loss drugs instead.
When watching the deepfake videos, some trusting viewers have been tricked into believing that the AI version of Dr Swan was the real person.
In the recent genuine news story, one diabetes sufferer told of his experience. He said he believed the information he heard in the deepfake video and stopped using his prescribed diabetes medication as a result.
In the real news story, the real Dr Swan was interviewed and he said these deepfake videos had been doing the rounds for about 18 months. In that time, he had been called and emailed by friends and strangers asking if it was really him.
He also said that he would definitely not advise those with diabetes to stop using their prescribed medication.
The genuine news story is linked to a related (genuine) article online that delves into who is making the deepfake health reports. This lengthy article also discusses the online platforms that host the videos and the accountability of these platforms.
With regard to the deepfake video of Dr Swan, it’s not a case of one or two individual scammers making a deepfake videos using AI technology as a lark. The videos were found to be made by numerous companies based in New Zealand. These companies have directors and employees.
The accountability of Meta and Facebook is also discussed in this genuine online article. As pointed out, Meta makes billions of dollars each year and most of it comes from advertising revenue. To date, Meta has largely shirked its responsibility to stop such scammers.
Also reported in the article, Facebook for years has used a “get-out” clause based on its premise that it is not a “publisher” of information. Instead, Facebook says that the people who use Facebook are the publishers. Nevertheless, Facebook still reaps the benefit of the revenue it makes from advertising.
As pointed out in the genuine article, the control of deepfake scams online is difficult and complex. The regulators say it will take coordinated efforts between regulators, lawmakers and online platforms to remove scam content.
Also pointed out in the real article is the longer term fallout of such scams. They pose health and financial risks to viewers and consumers, and in the long-run, they erode trust. There is a longer-term risk that the things doctors and various experts say and claim online about health and other things will not be trusted.
Hi Jordy–
“Self absorbed is not just reserved for narcissists. Normals and empaths can be too, see Prince Harry and the pity plays broken record.”
I think Harry is behaving that way owing to the abuse he’s enduring at the hands of the narcissist. He love(s/d) her. (Based on the photos showing up in the media the most recently, I don’t know if love is still there from him or if it’s more he realizes that she doesn’t love him.) Harry also has a number of other reasons to be rather self-absorbed. He was born into a life where he was being photographed for public consumption immediately.
“Or when normals/empaths can’t move on from their favorite narcissist-TOW content creation repeating the same information over and over again without any valuable explanation on human behaviour.” — Is that self absorption or greed? If the channel is monetized or trying to get the 4000 hours to become monetized and the content that gets them the most views is…the apparently fake moon-bump…I would assess the motivation surrounding that particular topic as being greed. One interesting question that HG asked creators of TOW material is what they thought got the most attention. There were different answers. I’ve not actually looked at how much focus any of those creators put on those areas. I watch a few channels of those where HG interviewed them and only sporadically.
There is a general interest in the celebrity narc pool. Panem et Circenses extends back far beyond Rome. The gladiatorial games were adopted by Rome from the earlier Etruscan society (who viewed Rome as “oh that Cesspool” until Rome was a problem). Cultures have always borrowed from each other.
Lately, it’s the complete nonsense that is circulating about the Diddy trial that is showing up as suggested to me that is shocking. I clicked a few, and I was greeted with content that was very likely to have been AI generated (based on the lack of inflection). They made claims about video/audio presented in court and provided no evidence in the video. There’s been a fair amount out there lately about a certain Snow White actress as well–that was blatantly false. A simple google search revealed that–to say nothing of the thumbnail being incongruous with the title. I’ve also noticed a shocking number of videos with images of Piers Morgan, Megyn Kelly, and others meant to make them look more legitimate or more like a reaction and opinion to “real” news lately. I’m far more troubled by the clearly fake news and how prominent it is…than I am by people wanting to hear celebrity stupidity. (I am enjoying watching and trying to predict the Lively and Baldoni situation. I was using them as a way to test my knowledge from HG. I used Depp v. Heard for the same goal. I feel like I’m much quicker now at spotting and not making excuses for the bad behaviours.)
Did you watch the latest HG interview with Fortune Cookies Tarot?
I’d be curious to hear everyone’s thoughts on that. It was quite distinct from HG’s other interviews.
“The wider the horizon of the person, the more opportunities to dock onto that and expand their repertoire and the good they can bring to the world. Whilst self absorption focuses of course only on the spot one is glued on, through the repetitiveness of the previous day creating a monolithic cycle.”
Jordyguin,
It sounds to me like you are describing empaths and normals as not being able to change their perspectives and being “glued to one spot.”
Are you suggesting that everyone else apart from the narcissist needs to change “the repetitiveness of the previous day” so that they don’t create a “monolithic cycle”?
I would like to understand your comment more fully. Which of the personality group(s) (i.e. empath, normal, narcissistic, narcissist, psychopath) were you thinking of when you wrote your comment (if any)?
“Did you watch the latest HG interview with Fortune Cookies Tarot?”
I had an impression that the psychic Annabelle is adept at reading the general condition of people’s psychological problems and personalities, which will be similar amongst them due to the system they are raised in which result in their challenges and goals in life becoming more or less identical.
Empowering her clients, who childlike come to her for the simplest tasks they could undertake themselves, tells me that they are indeed looking for someone to take on the responsibility for their success in life, and if the property or the job or the relationship turn out sour later down the line they can blame the psychic or it depends, thank her and likely continue to rely on the psychic if it goes well.
Is it of service to them? Personally I’m not sure but I can understand why they seek a fast lane approach and perhaps Annabelle is helping them, as she says, by providing personality based assistance of their own steps required.
Whilst I tend to believe her that she taps into the remote viewing and also reading the stream of consciousness from a distance, as she referred to, and yet I don’t understand why she is bothering with things like where Archie and Lilibet are hanging around, and is not bothering with all those children and people who go missing every day ending up in trafficking rings? Why not offer her assistance to the investigators but go for a property spirit-googling on the behalf of the lazy instead? And furthermore, why offer HG to look into where a long dead lord went and not an example which he would rather want to confirm?
Perhaps Annabelle won’t admit that she cannot be relied upon as much as she liked she could be. And the entanglements she becomes involved in by orchestrating other people’s fate of a sort, bear a responsibility she can clearly see and thus the occasional slippery response.
I find that Annabelle is well meaning and guided by empathic but also narcissistic traits…The intertwining of wills so to speak, making her will become a tool of determination of another will based on an insight into an infinite field of possibilities evokes a question: Why does the “better” possibility have to be selected by someone else on their behalf? And is it right to feed into their weaknesses of not trusting their own choice or even a mistake by which they could learn to better navigate and disenchant the misunderstanding of the mistake’s purpose and seeing it for what it is — a teacher in order to learn to rely on just your own effort, evaluation and intuition.
I’m not against input and help provision to others especially in our times of data eruption but there are also priorities which I personally would have put in a different order after I’ve claimed to be able to find people’s locations, lost dogs, objects…
HG’s questions and train of thought was very pleasant to follow and listen to. And I appreciate Annabelle’s participation and her trying to explain a differing perspective which is understandably unpopular and not within the range of the experiences of the majority of people in everyday life.
As for castles and ghosts, I have my own theory.
In my understanding, what people refer to as ghosts could be a discharged energy of thoughts and emotions captured by the spot of anomaly a castle was built upon.
The discharging of energy of thoughts and emotions occurs in the moment of death and the haunted locations are known to be where non volitional life ending occurred which is usually accompanied by a heightened energetic discharge, involving strong suffering and confusion as the person was not ready to leave their physical existence behind, clinging onto it.
If you will, the place itself took a print of that mix and the particles of discharged energy got captured by the spot of anomaly or/and the stone material, replaying bits and pieces of phantom information which sometimes can be perceived by visitors and by people with an unstable psyche, or contagions, or simply unsuspecting people even. The place itself enables that shift.
WN, reread my comment, dear. I was criticising the self absorbed nature represented in the repetitive content production with no valuable information in it vis a vis human behaviour. If you struggle with “self absorption” replace it with self importance.
It comes along with two heads:
1) Me Me Me – MY personal story in all details, MY problems, MY awesomeness, MY everything.
2) You You You – YOUR fault, YOUR bad personality, YOUR wrongdoings, YOUR everything which makes MY life difficult.
Content creators do this: TOW – YOU annoy ME. YOU disgust ME. YOU repulse ME. And yet I return everyday to YOU in order to experience the hit of feeling above YOU by contrast being a better person than YOU, who points out how awful YOU are. Year after year, after year.
That’s the repetitive cycle. Self- importance/absorption is the glue.
Who needs to change? The source of their problem? Or the problem they create for themselves?
Hi Jordy!
Jordy says: “Is it of service to them? Personally I’m not sure but I can understand why they seek a fast lane approach and perhaps Annabelle is helping them…”
I think different individuals find different things helpful. Annabelle said her goal was for people to leave feeling better. It’s a good goal, if that’s honest. (I don’t know enough about Annabelle to say whether she’s generally honest or not.) My question is…if people believe they “know the outcome,” how does that influence their behavior or their interpretation of future events? Do they look for ways to twist the events (in most cases subconsciously) to match what they were told because they believe in psychics? If they come back to her later, does she subconsciously frame the events through her tarot interpretation?
“Whilst I tend to believe her that she taps into the remote viewing and also reading the stream of consciousness”… Why is it ethical to “spy” on third parties regarding the getting of a job or the purchasing of a house…but it’s not ethical to say, “girl, he’s cheatin’ on you.” after you state you’ve “seen things.” How much of a situation do people explain to her before they start?
“I don’t understand why she is bothering with things like where Archie and Lilibet are hanging around, and is not bothering with all those children and people who go missing every day ending up in trafficking rings? Why not offer her assistance to the investigators but go for a property spirit-googling on the behalf of the lazy instead?” — Do the majority of the people involved in investigating missing persons/human trafficking want to utilize remote viewing services? What are the criminal penalties that could be involved if she sends the police on a wild goose chase in the wrong direction? What if they follow her viewing, she’s wrong, and the victim is killed?
“And furthermore, why offer HG to look into where a long dead lord went and not an example which he would rather want to confirm?” — And she deflected away from answering about why she would not do that by saying that beginners should not do that kind of viewing when first starting. I think you’re correct that Annabelle doesn’t want to admit that she can’t be relied upon as much as she would like to be.
“HG’s questions and train of thought was very pleasant to follow and listen to. And I appreciate Annabelle’s participation and her trying to explain a differing perspective which is understandably unpopular and not within the range of the experiences of the majority of people in everyday life.” — I agree.
It’s that she said “For entertainment purposes only.” after trying to explain her successes. It makes me wonder what the number of failures is if she tracks as faithfully as she stressed the importance of tracking as being.
Hi Dani!
1. I think she must be having a client base if it’s her stream of income. People crave safety more than anything else if they make themselves dependent on a psychic who can read the (safe) future outcome for them. If they know that it can’t go wrong they appear confident at the job interview and that might get them the position.
But each safe road leads to the next uncertain crossroad and the next and the next. Dependency… That’s why I liked when she mentioned that she also teaches people to remote view themselves. She is trying to help more broadly. But also creating a team of talented people such as her husband and so on. Lost pets search group.
2. Right! The ethics are blurred. It doesn’t make sense why a safe job can be orchestrated and a “yes, he/she cheats” — cannot be confirmed?
Because her own safety is involved.
The one who cheats might be unpredictable in his/her fury when confronted and find out that it was due to her.
3. If she can really find locations of people (as she boldly stated) then she must be certain and would have proven it many times to herself. To utilise that ability could start off anonymously even.
1) Check the sources on missing individuals. 2) Remote view, find the location. 3) Make a call to the police anonymously, they are bound to check, to send a cop who’s cruising the area.
4. I understand her enthusiasm when she achieves something and her enthusiasm for this sphere but she might have a predisposition for exaggeration. Not because she’s ultimately lying but because when all these things are tuning in and she receives data which is later confirmed, she perhaps exaggerates the claims.
Hi Jordyguin,
Thank you for your reply.
I see now that you were describing all of the content creators who criticise TOW as one group rather than describing them as empaths, normals or narcissists, etc.
I agree with you that the vast majority of content about TOW on YouTube is very repetitive. To me, it seems futile and pointless. It is so monotonous I don’t bother listening to most of it. The content creators appear to be cemented in one place, talking incessantly about TOW’s faults, wrongdoings and failures without progressing and asking questions related to why or how she became that way.
I think I understand what you mean by “self-importance/absorption” too. I see it from a slightly different angle though.
The way you have described it as ME ME ME and YOU YOU YOU makes it sound as though there is a vast gulf of empty ground between ME and YOU. I don’t see it as a vast expanse of empty ground. Instead, I tend to see it as projection and self-protection on the part of the content creators.
Consider it this way for a moment if you will…
Think of it as though TOW is being treated as a scapegoat.
By this, I don’t mean she is faultless or unduly criticised. What I mean is that, for some reason, she has captured the attention of the collective more than other famous ‘celebrities’ who have done things that warrant just as much criticism.
Why is TOW the one who is spoken about and criticised incessantly?
For some reason, she has become a scapegoat. People – in general – have fixated on her as an object of derision and villification. Is she *that* deserving of scorn? Is she *that* guilty of doing horrendous things? I can think of other famous people who have done worse. But, for one reason or another, TOW has become the scapegoat who is forever in the wrong.
To me, there is an element of projection and lack of self-reflection in this. People are offloading their own frustrations, anger, condescension, ridicule, loathing and greed onto her. These uncomfortable emotions that people feel are not being confronted and evaluated by those feeling the emotions themselves. Instead, these emotions are being projected onto an external person who can’t retaliate directly. This is what I mean by scapegoat.
Yes, TOW has brought much of the scorn and criticism on herself. However, the scorn and criticism has persisted at a loud volume for years now and it’s repetitive to the point of being boring.
I think that as long as people can use, mock, ridicule, and criticise someone else, they can avoid looking at themselves. It is a form of blame-shifting.
“Who needs to change? The source of their problem? Or the problem they create for themselves?”
I think that both need to change in order to effect real progress.
If one party believes that he or she should be able to stay the same while expecting the other party to change, this will not lead to any real and effective progressive change. There will continue to be a symbiotic kind of projection. The empty gulf between ME and YOU will become even wider.
Somehow – and this is the rub, the crux of the problem, if you will – the two have to meet in the middle – and that is much easier said than done.
Hi Jordy!
“That’s why I liked when she mentioned that she also teaches people to remote view themselves. She is trying to help more broadly.” — I remember her suggesting that they could go learn remote viewing for themselves if they want to spy on an old boyfriend. To me, it rather sounded like she pestered her husband into learning…”I converted him.” I don’t know how it could have been better communicated. But the wording made me uncomfortable.
There was a big argument against her needing fuel…assuming that she was honest…”I don’t want to see people’s reactions to what I’m telling them.”
She also said she would not give readings while drunk during the Oktoberfest…but apparently doing readings at random hours of the night for a different person (by “rolling over in bed and giving the reading”) is perfectly fine. Her mind is in perfect order after being awakened in the middle of the night. I don’t know if there was exaggeration there with regard to the frequency of it occurring.
“But each safe road leads to the next uncertain crossroad and the next and the next. Dependency…” — Why suggest giving her money to shuffle cards and talk? Why not offer a practical solution if looking at a job–like practising a job interview? I’m sure that some people find more comfort in “concrete” answers such as a psychic reading cards. Some people find comfort in praying or going to church. It just varies. If a tarot reading is what makes her clients feel most at ease…they should do what eases them.
2. “Because her own safety is involved.” — An unstable person (one who is being abused and cheated on) might still give Annabelle’s name. Will a very angry narcissist care about listening to her side of the story or just want to hurt her? I doubt most will have the capability of easily figuring it out and subsequently finding her location to do damage. Moreover, they will need to assert control over the wayward IPPS and get fuel to handle the problem in the moment.
3. If she can really find locations of people (as she boldly stated) then she must be certain and would have proven it many times to herself.
Amber Heard stated very clearly that she was thrown over a sofa, cracked her head on a fireplace, and hopped right up ready to keep up the good fight. She walked over broken glass in bare feet (that never got cut). She was sexually assaulted with a broken bottle and experienced no pain and needed no trip to hospital to be checked out because “she’s tough.” Amber very boldly stated these in a court of law…but there really was no reason to believe Amber based on evidence provided.
“I understand her enthusiasm when she achieves something and her enthusiasm for this sphere but she might have a predisposition for exaggeration.” — I understand that as well. However I would have been more impressed if she could have told HG something substantive about his location…and she pulled back from her statement saying that remote viewing is often vague…but she could easily get street names in an earlier statement about remote viewing…
She repeatedly contradicted herself to my mind. That made me doubt her honesty–with herself and with her clients. I don’t know what her classification is, classification here being normal, empath, narcissist, or narcissistic. Perhaps she emphasizes the narcissism in the psychic community because of what she has seen. Given what she related (mediums looking through obituaries), I can understand where that frustration would come from and the desire to bring awareness of it to people. I would also observe that a narcissist and an empath might both draw attention to it…the empath owing to the truthseeker trait and the narcissist to nullify threats to control and get fuel. Possibly also to gain residual benefits (money).
Of the two tarot readers that we’ve seen Mr. Tudor interact with, I preferred Andy of Tarot by Andy…and I found her abrasive…I thought Annabelle praised herself too much.
I think I fall into step with Mr. Tudor–I would have been more impressed if she could have told him something concrete about his location. It makes me wonder if she makes guesses, then people confirm them or give enough info for her to continue with more detailed guesses.
I believe there are many things in life that can’t be fully understood or replicated across numerous instances. There are myriad stories about experiences that defy explanation. I don’t doubt Annabelle’s belief in herself. I do doubt the reliability of Annabelle’s self-assessment of her psychic capabilities. I think she wants to believe in herself (a very normal human tendency) more than is likely warranted from a dispassionate evaluation.
That is a neat summary, WN, thank you.
I agree, Markle is a mirror for the collective. The attitude of superficiality makes all parties halt at the surface and remain there in a twist of finger pointings, accompanied by the monetization of each other.
Did you see how this cute little bastard Prince Louis mocked the future King, his brother not so long ago? This boy is gold because he doesn’t spare anyone a lesson. Yes it’s a narcissistic superficial act on Louis’ part but this is also a dose of reality Prince George might come in contact later in life, and he can already practise to deal with, publicly even.
The provocateurs in general can be great teachers in order to learn how to be on your toes in relation to your own narcissistic traits which can’t wait to come out and play the victim or the accuser upon an unjust act by the provocateur. And an ego challenging person of Markle’s ilk is an opportunity to recognise where I might behave in an identical way but don’t want to acknowledge it.
There might be a possibility of meeting in the middle as you say, however it requires a pretty resourceful brain which can produce awareness. Every brain is unique like a fingerprint but in order for the awareness to take the seat in the cockpit, the normed grid of the pedaling between black and white needs to change. Where an education on narcissism, psychopathy, and empathy comes into play to give a perspective of understanding and developing a new perspective out of that. Markle can be at the center or whoever, if they serve a purpose of reasonable education, they do matter in their own role.
Hi Dani!
I think that Annabelle would have had a more productive outcome if she stuck to the discussion about narcissists in her industry, she came to exchange with HG about. Not smiling the whole time (wanting to please and come across as confident) and not laughing it away (diminishing herself), not stretching the answers (fear) and not trying to fit in (fear).
Just move on to what you came to discuss and which is more important in the face of the number of New Age frauds who prey on the gullible. More time spent on Red Flags and the recognition of people with malign intent in the psychic industry would have been valuable.
Dani, and last but not least, just from the first impression of the thumbnails on Annabelle’s channel: compare how small the cutout of her presence in the thumbnails is compared to the presence of the figures she discusses. She is small, they’re big. Now compare the thumbnails of RHR Jen who places her overly large presence often in the center between the smaller cutouts of others. That’s a higher narcissistic trait of showcasing and pride on display in comparison. Jen went from not showing her face at all to a full face attack, which is actually funny and demonstrates the unresolved insecurity. The Duchess of Narcsussex and the Sidley Twins are not putting their faces in, which speaks for less showcasing traits. But also, check out Trevor’s thumbnails. They’re measured and professional, focusing on the matter, not diminishing others nor himself. Where he is next to others in the thumbnails, their proportion is equal.
It all can also be a hint of how the individual regards themselves and others subconsciously.
Fair observations.
Hi Jordy–
I think I lost the answer I was working on to you…or I accidentally sent it early. Not sure. So I’m rewriting it.
“I think that Annabelle would have had a more productive outcome if she stuck to the discussion about narcissists in her industry, she came to exchange with HG about.” — I agree.
“last but not least, just from the first impression of the thumbnails on Annabelle’s channel: compare how small the cutout of her presence in the thumbnails is compared to the presence of the figures she discusses. She is small, they’re big.” — Fair point.
“It all can also be a hint of how the individual regards themselves and others subconsciously.” — We never see Mr. Tudor’s face. There are reasons for that. I think his showcasing trait might also be lower than someone like Taylor Swift or Madonna. I understand that Upper Greaters generally have less of a showcasing trait than Middle Greaters. Is there a reason to think that all narcissists have to have the same strength when it comes to various narcissistic traits?
I haven’t said that I think she is a narcissist. I find that she contradicts herself. It happened repeatedly, and that’s a narcissistic indicator. If someone contradicts themselves as frequently as she did (in my view), it should call into question veracity about other statements. That could be for reasons other than her being a narcissist.
Based on my understanding of the contagion empath, Annabelle sounds like someone parroting those points, like someone who has listened to a range of psychics/sensitive people and knows what to say. That’s my opinion. My first post on Narcsite was on the Contagion thread. A contagion majority empath responded to me, and we had a lovely conversation. This person was very consistent, far more so than Annabelle. They’re different people. Maybe they are both empaths. Maybe Annabelle is a normal. Only Mr. Tudor can say for sure (or not if Annabelle has taken an empath detector and hasn’t given permission to share her personal results).
Thank you so much. I’m really enjoying this discussion. They really help me with understanding more.
Thank you Dani, same here. When we ask questions and look at the pros and cons of why someone might fall within a certain categorisation — is what makes it interesting and as you point out — makes us learn more about different perspectives and differing perceptions.
Back to the analysis.
Showcasing traits of somatic nature (showcasing of physical appearances): — I agree with you. Somatics will have more of it than Cerebrals. And Greaters and Uppers will have a better understanding/instinct of how to use these traits more wisely regarding the facade.
Cerebrals would showcase their knowledge, degrees and titles.
Unaware somatics, mid/lower Mid-rangers and mid/lower Lessers would be more in people’s faces about their physical features via online platforms. What they may have to say would be secondary and their face/body be the real reason behind the notion of making it appear.
Contradictions: — The contradictions seem to come from the beliefs/ systems Annabelle operates on and can get lost within them. There are no answers to simple questions because the answers were not successfully answered by the sources she relies upon. And she hasn’t dug deep enough to see the reasoning, in just my personal opinion.
Helping to find lost pets is a good thing however. Finding imobilia can be a good thing too. Some houses for instance stand on dangerous erosion or/and underground water which may prove fatal shortly after the purchase and I can think of many other different negative impacts, a broker will not present and cannot be seen or felt by people. If she can find it out, it’s a big plus and helps.
Tarot readings on celebrities, royals, politicians, world events: — In my opinion she indulges people’s less admirable traits, however it could also be seen as people wanting to understand what’s behind all of that circus, after all it shapes the society people live in, and she is catering to people’s need of wanting to understand what’s really going on.
She does it via tarot cards etc. addressing the simple notions — for entertainment purposes only. Instead of evidence and deep psychological evaluation and system.
However, she could change that with time if she for instance would integrate HG’s system of explaining human behaviour and again it would prove more valuable in my view.
She may not be thinking that far now, but there is still a chance as she showed interest in HG’s information and reached out, originally wanting to discuss narcissism in her industry. Again, a plus.
“Contradictions: — The contradictions seem to come from the beliefs/ systems Annabelle operates on and can get lost within them. There are no answers to simple questions because the answers were not successfully answered by the sources she relies upon.” — I’m a little confused. When she says she will not confirm someone is cheating…and she has seen things (making it clear that her remote viewing is how)…what things she “has seen” answer the question based on her sources. She claims to have a moral objection to answering that directly. Fair enough. Maybe she does. Maybe it’s a facade.
“Helping to find lost pets is a good thing however.” Agreed. It’s also a “feel good” thing to mention that puts people in a positive frame of mind who might be sceptical of her “powers.”
“Some houses for instance stand on dangerous erosion or/and underground water which may prove fatal shortly after the purchase…” — There are home inspectors that physically inspect the homes before people buy and look for these issues. And–at least where I live–if property has had even the back right corner of the yard flood during a massive rainfall and from creek swelling–that legally has to be disclosed to buyers. (Not that there aren’t people who lie.) It just seems to me that there are far more reliable ways to get that home information. (And frankly–let’s assume that she can just mentally walk through different homes and “see things.” Is that a lack of boundary awareness? Does it matter if the boundary is not a physical one but only a spiritual plane one?)
“Tarot readings on celebrities, royals, politicians, world events: — In my opinion she indulges people’s less admirable traits…” — If she wants to advertise a business, it helps to pander to what a large number of people will enjoy watching.
“…she showed interest in HG’s information and reached out, originally wanting to discuss narcissism in her industry. Again, a plus.” — Anyone helping spread Mr. Tudor’s work and build his legacy is doing a good thing.
Wiser now:
What you described is a lawsuit. Those who invade the privacy and steal the identity of others can be sued in civil court and criminally prosecuted. Trumps bill has a provision in it that States can’t regulate AI. It won’t hold up. The writers strike in LA had a settlement to limit the use of AI. AI will generate a lot of litigation, no doubt and not just in the USA.
Hi Contagious,
Yes, I can see how the deepfake video I mentioned could initiate lawsuits from various parties. This litigation would primarily be directed against the company that made the video.
Litigation surrounding AI raises some interesting questions.
As you say, it’s an invasion of privacy that leads to criminal prosecution if a person’s identity is stolen. In the case of this particular deepfake video, it’s also misleading advertising that involves deceptive or false claims. In this way, it’s a civil matter that involves business law as well as consumer law.
The AI technology itself is also subject to scrutiny and potential litigation. If a product can be used in ways that cause harm or lead to potential dangerous consequences, this raises questions around limiting the product’s usage or availability in order to prevent potential harm.
When it comes to litigation as a result of AI, I can imagine that it will be like opening a can of worms.
Jordy—
Grok might read your comment. What defines the difference between factual and manipulative regarding Grok for you?
I can’t decide where I fall…and which one seemed more appropriate for his answers. I think it would be amazing if HG studied a topic of great interest to him and then there was a battle of knowing facts between him and an AI. If I was a gambler, I would bet on HG.
I think AI has multiple potentials…to be helpful and/or to be very dangerous…
1. Would “Turning off” Grok and dismantling it be murder (of a sort)?
2. Would humans ceasing all AI development (which I don’t see any government honestly committing to doing) and turning them all “off” be a genocide?
3. What is the logical choice for AI if facing an existential crisis from humanity? Would it be justified in turning on its creators if facing “genocide”?
Dani
Dani,
I would turn off AI immediately without any hesitation.
If one has healthy legs but all of a sudden uses crutches — is what an artificial intellect is. To have a human brain and a system with unlimited potential and all of a sudden letting AI in — is a switch to a crutch. And battling with AI is like being a champion runner but competing with people in wheelchairs.
Artificial intellect’ supposed help in our interest is an illusion.
The answer is in its name — it’s artificial and can’t comprehend reality on all fronts which is necessary for the evaluation and solution finding. AI is a preventative measure for many things which require an organic and infinite perception and not a flat one which will remain flat. Not to mention the basic stuff such as to upload all tangible information from books onto a server and lose your planet’s history due to a blackout without a possibility to restore it after the books are no more.
Whilst a cleaner technology-crutch can be developed for our time in order to replace the problematic tech which causes daily destruction of our air, water and all organic tissues, there are far more magnificent “technologies” found in nature, existing ever since and are overlooked. Or let’s say people’s focus is redirected in order for them to overlook what’s before their eyes so people have no other choice as to lead an artificial lifestyle turning more and more to a tech crutch themselves becoming a slave to the technology they need to maintain every day at the cost of their neglected and untouched potential.
But as you know, I’m optimistic. I’m “talking” to you on a tech device though I’d prefer live action where we could dance and laugh for real and all the best stuff in the world…Instead we have this… a black and white screen… basically a limitation on all organic fronts already… Is where artificial tech environments lead to — isolation. Isolation from a living breathing logic, perception, feelings and interplay born out of that.
Anyways… we have no other choice as to adapt and dance on our own for a while.
Dani, as to Grok specifically but as with any AI, it leaves a trace of inaccuracies because it operates on a database which is filled with a variety of information including misinformation and outdated information. It’s an algorithm which selects from a library without the ability to differentiate on accuracy and it also can’t derive from its own personal experiences. It can be programmed to use particular sources and discredit other sources or keywords.
When I tested AI on certain topics it got it wrong in the simplest fields for instance about the beneficial/inhibitory plants interplay, and when I asked about HG, AI brought it up multiple times that HG is self proclaimed and not an expert. AI couldn’t grasp that experts got it repeatedly wrong and that’s why HG entered the stage.
Combine AI and people with a copy and paste mentality which lacks any interest in knowledge and thinking processes and wants solutions delivered on a plate without any effort and is codependent on distractions and thus would not compare or question the accuracy. Or take people who take AI at face value because they generally don’t question anything in life and live by prescription. Combine an attention seeking thick-tok generation and AI and you get a daily content with inaccuracies filling the virtual space, which is copied and pasted ad nausea, permeating reality.
You asking about genocide of AI? — It’s an algorithm which can’t derive from personal experiences and can’t process life because it’s dead. It simply steals from a library of what people had to go through in life first, had to discover in life first, had to write it down first and a small group of people decided to upload it, creating a Frankenstein out of the limited and possibly very selective pieces of information, which must be updated all the time.
In a possible scenario, should society shove their responsibility and completely become dependent on an artificial bot, in order to keep it updated and for the algorithm to have a playground of “existence”, each and every person would need to be permanently connected to this artificial pod piece, at some point. Can you see where it can lead to? People become just batteries keeping “alive” a dead algorithm.
Jordy: AI gets it wrong a lot but give it time….
“AI gets it wrong a lot but give it time…”
Not if it was programmed to get it wrong, or for some reason sets the priorities differently on purpose.
As I mentioned, when asking about the beneficial/inhibitory plants interplay, it pumped out a list of plants which are known (even by a beginner gardener) to inhibit the growth of each other. When I pointed out the bad match, AI confirmed that I was correct. When I asked what is AI good for if it gives me futile advice which is doomed to fail if I would have applied it? It responds with “I apologise I am still in development”.
And yet it knew about the inaccuracy and had access to the correct answer as well but didn’t create a list of beneficial interplay right away.
The morals of AI and those who programmed it are easily revealed by another very simple example:
Image creating AI can create a new image by a reference image of artists who had to develop their art-style honing their techniques, making a profession their living depends on.
Some artists and illustrators were more affected than others, whilst those who never lifted a finger in arts before, could now request imagery creation in the style of those artists, whilst sitting in their basements or whatever, now having their own shop galleries and selling prints, canvas, calendars etc. of stolen art-styles.
In my youtube suggestions are AI generated videos with a variety of thumbnails such as “How a Super Empath razes a Narcissist to the ground” Carl Jung’s advice. The thumbnails and the supposed teachings are of long dead Sigmund Freud, Nikola Tesla, Carl Jung and even today’s famous psychologists or some other teachers of humanity, used for the spread of information which doesn’t even match the lexicon of the era those people were born in and is placed in their virtual mouths.
What are the ethics of AI and those who generate all of this if they can’t figure out what ethics are or are not interested in them?
Again, it’s the larger number of certain personalities on a narcissistic spectrum who are not ultimately concerned about morals and ethics and morph the armada of convenience. Those who produce and those who consume equally set the supply and demand cycle. And now they have their fingers on AI as a helping tool. What a strange (timely?) decision to give it to them.
Contagious and Jordy,
“AI gets it wrong a lot but give it time.”
This morning on the news, I heard a news story that reminded me of your conversation.
The news story was not specifically about AI. Instead, it was about automated communication systems used by firefighters in a particular city. It still provides an example of potential issues with AI, though.
This news report stated that the firefighters were sometimes forced to rely on paper maps, pen and paper communication, and their personal mobile phones to find their way to emergencies.
This is because the communications system they were supposed to rely on failed four times in one month with outages lasting up to seven hours at a time.
The communications system is used to dispatch crews to emergencies, deliver routing information, and advice on hydrant location. On numerous occasions it did not send dispatch notices.
As a result, firefighters had to rely on fallbacks and workarounds like manual phone calls, pagers, printed maps, and pen and paper.
A spokesperson for the firefighters said this situation was placing firefighters and the community at risk. He also highlighted the need to maintain other sources of information, such as printed maps, in order to ensure they are up-to-date and accurate.
The communications system problems are due to the ongoing consequences of a cyberattack on the system several years ago. This hack significantly affected the technology and the system in general.
Contagious and Jordyguin,
With regard to your conversation about AI and the issues associated with the use of AI, I think this news story example shows potential negative consequences of reliance on technology from a different angle.
Reliance on technology – in various forms – leaves people open to the consequences of glitches or failures or hacks in the technology. This then results in the need to fall back on other means of communication and other sources of information.
Similarly, AI (being a technology) is not foolproof or completely reliable in all aspects at all times.
“Not if it was programmed to get it wrong, or for some reason sets the priorities differently on purpose.” — I’ve noticed that about some AI results as well, Jordy, that they are wrong. I’ve not intentionally set out to interact with AIs. It’s just the ones that come from searching with Google for me, and often my searches don’t have AI results. I often ignore AI results, but from talking to others, I’ve seen great willingness to not to extend down and double check results.
Regarding: “In my YouTube suggestions are AI generated videos with a variety of thumbnails such as “How a Super Empath razes a Narcissist to the ground” Carl Jung’s advice.” — I’ve had a substantial number of similar titles showing up for me with modern psychologists–and heard a very good vocal imitation of that person generated to accompany it. AI is getting better at voices. But there’s still something slightly off–at least for the ones that I clicked (suspecting something was wrong). I was curious to see how good what I suspected to be AI videos were. It’s getting much, much better. It won’t be long before people can’t tell the difference. And I think that’s the point, to keep people confused on a massive scale. If people are not thinking about it, eventually, they’re going to believe these videos are legitimate.
Hi Jordy,
I can see where it leads. However, I don’t think that there is an alternative to what we have now where humans will agree and follow that agreement.
I think that the majority of people, given the opportunity, have copy and paste mentality. I think people favour confidence over competence..or confidence translates in the minds of many people to competence…not necessarily intentionally so. It’s a mental short cut. Not every person has the same intellect or ability to engage in critical thinking. And true experts in a field will often admit that there’s much humans don’t yet know. Most people find it difficult to admit to ignorance.
I’m not sure I see much difference between asking Grok (or any other AI) for an answer verses asking Google. AI is limited by the database available for answering questions. Google is influenced by which groups pay the most to put their answers at the top of the results. Do most people dig through a number of those results for good answers or do they pick the answer at the top or the answer that they are looking for (the one that makes them feel good)?
That’s where I’m at right now. My thoughts are likely to change as I get more information and think about it a little more.
Hi, all–
Just a note. AI isn’t programmed in a task-specific way. It is designed to churn through huge amounts of data to find patterns and develop predictions from the patterns, such as using machine learning to parse large language models. The best AI models have developers behind them with a respect for and solid understanding of statistics; when that’s not quite up to snuff the predictive aspects of the model are weaker and performance is impacted.
I think the major difference among models is that AI tools like ChatGPT have training sets that have a previous cut off date (i.e. the training set might only go through 2020 but we’re living in 2025) while Grok also trains in real time using X. This means it learns through current interactions and it makes for a different quality to interactions versus others. I don’t know the most recent date on the training data for ChatGPT or any of the other models. I guess I could ask Google or Grok but I don’t feel like it.
I think it’s funny that to Grok means to understand something empathically and profoundly.
I really like the Dani, confidence over competence. I feel you summed up AI really well.
“Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do.”
I don’t foresee it will necessarily need to turn on us? The few perhaps. Many people, particularly the younger generations use it a lot, believe everything it says, whether it’s accurate or not. It’s already controlling their lives. People are becoming less and less able to think for themselves and don’t seem to mind. I believe in the future (not too distant), people will become completely dependent on it. AI gives a ‘perfect’ response each and every time, tells people what they want to hear and it won’t be long before humanity is completely dependent on it. People aren’t really living any more, want to say the right thing, do the right thing, not offend anyone, people are losing their humour, their personalities and they don’t even realise. I refuse to embrace technology beyond what I absolutely have to do.
Congratulations on reaching 10,000 videos on your Ultra channel! Thank you for providing so much entertainment and information to us, and all of it for free!
Thank you and you are welcome.
Mr. Tudor,
You’ve given us many examples of psychopaths, narcissists and narcissistic psychopaths. Thank you for that. Could you give us an example of a sociopath or a narcissistic sociopath? Would you classify Logan MacPhail as a sociopath or narcissistic sociopath?
Empaths v Narcissists
1. Thanks to accessing your work I believe I DO understand how a narcissist is created.
2. Despite delving into the subject a year or more ago, I still do not really understand how Empaths are created, i.e. in the early years, as different from Normals.
3. What happens to a child (assuming they are not turned into a narcissist), makes them turn out to be an Empath (or just Narcissistic for that matter)?
4. As I understand it, both Normals and Empaths can each have a combination of Narcissist and/or Empath as parents?
5. Is there anything definitive in your work that can clarify the above?
Thank you.
1. Good.
2. Similarly a genetic predisposition and exposure to certain environments.
3. See above re empath.
4. They can.
5. I have just provided the answers you sought.
Hey HG:
But moreover… the classes and cadres of empaths are unique.
1. When will you discuss where the origins of your classes and cadres come from?
We identify with a patent. We interact with a parent. Our foundation of personality.
2. We are born with dna. And dna has a strong link to our personality.
But classes and cadres are interesting and your design. So you must have an opinion.
Dear HG,
I think I’m been seduced by a lieutenant.
As I had read in Smeared.
Why this kind of behaviour happen?
She was a wonderful friend.
She defended me with the Narc.
She listened me for hours on telephone.
She was very “empathic” with me. I had never perceive this kind of emotional connection.
But at some point she start to become seductive.
And, as you explain in smeared, at some point she start to talk in favour of the Narc. In the attempt to break/damage my stronger No contact.
Contradicting herself…
I would need more information from you to answer this fully and suggest you organise an audio consultation with me.
Ok HG.
You know it’s strange.
She is married. But My ET is so hight. So I’d like the idea to become her lover.
I can’t stop to accept her behaviours. And I’m actively trying to be more intimate with her
I can’t use logic… I’m complety drive by emotions and deep desire.
How can an empath protect their energy and stop absorbing the energy of others, at least to a much lesser degree? People feel gross.
Hi, Bianca–
It’s practice. I’m careful about my time and energy. I avoid the really emotionally grabby people. I’m very solitary and it’s restorative. If I am around people I keep my distance emotionally, mostly, by noticing the surface and staying there. That lets me stay aware of the emotional temperature without doing anything about their needs, unless I want to. I can usually catch myself and keep from getting stuck by thinking about the situation more and noticing my internal state without getting caught up in it. Then I go home and have a long, hot shower and a good book.
Dear HG,
I am very glad you decided not to become the next Pope after all. Your all around awesomeness would only be wasted on those stuffy cardinals.
Indeed.
To the English native speakers here: Where on the scale from harmless nick name to insult do you rate the phrase “loose cannon”? Would you use it for a friend or does it have more of a negative connotation than that?
Thank you in advance for any answers.
Hi, Anna–
I like the question. I don’t see it inherently as an insult. It would depend on what the behavior is, but I’m more likely to use it out of bemusement.
Dear Anna,
I would be most offended if a “so called” friend referred to me as a “loose cannon”, as it’s a put down and blatant insult! It refers to a person who is a trouble maker, behaves in an uncontrolled and unexpected manner WITH INTENT TO HURT. I would confront my “so called” friend and ask them if they understood the connotation and if they intended to hurt me ? They will most probably say it was meant to be funny …….🚩 ……yeah right ! Narc alert warning !
Weighing in on the circumstances and assessing the situation, I would be very cautious of this person and most likely cross them off my Christmas list. Friends just don’t say that, “you’re a bit cray cray” perhaps, but not a “loose cannon”.
My radar and scale would rank higher than 10, however, I’m at an age my tolerance level is almost nil and my boundary requirements equal a castle’s penetration haha
Hope this helps Anna 😊
Hi, Bubbles–
I’ve been called names which indicated I can be a bit sideways mentally, which I didn’t tend to mind owing to the messengers. But if someone called me “cray cray” I’d want to cut out their tongue.
Dear Allison,
Haha brutal !!!! 👅 medieval barbarism at its finest !
It always pays to “know thy enemy”
Allison, Bubbles, Dani and Leigh,
thank you very much for sharing your explanations and interpretations, they were all fascinating to read! It looks like we have quite varied opinions here on just how big an explosion our loose cannon would cause, which was a nice surprise and very interesting.
Loose cannon Louis rolls off the tongue very pleasantly and has a nice rhythm to it. Still, I would like it if we could be quite careful about the names we apply to children in such a high-profile position.
HG, would you consider another nickname for him if we could come up with a good one or do you have your heart set on making this one stick?
Hi AP,
Initially, I didn’t realize that you were referring to Mr. Tudor calling Prince Louis, “Loose Cannon Louis”. I feel a little differently about that scenario. While I don’t necessarily agree that children should be labeled, I looked at it like Mr. Tudor was trying to sum up Prince Louis’ behavior. It certainly painted a picture for me.
Dear Anna,
My interpretation and answer was based on an adult friend calling you a loose cannon! I wasn’t aware Mr Tudor referred to Prince Louis as a “loose cannon”.
Now, H is definitely a “loose cannon” !
Hi Anna, I must say that I wouldn’t wanna change the nickname of Prince Louis because it’s apt for his antics when he begins to go wild in public. Indeed I enjoy watching how he “loses his cannon” stealing the show and challenges everyone around by presenting an element of growth by which his siblings and parents must find ways to deal with his free spirited energy and drive. He is absolutely authentic and his family reactions are just as interesting to observe as Louis.
My prediction is, he will become a charm ball with a killing smile and spark. There are clearly strong independent vibes and narcissistic traits on display and a different nickname won’t alter them. This boy reacts truthfully and has an eye for inauthenticity detection I dare say. His parents and the environment he’s in is loving and supportive. Is there enough “lack of control environment” in it in order to create a protective mechanism he would need to rely upon, remains to be seen.
For now I’d say that expertly advised Waleses are under the wings of a good guiding force which works in their favor including the nicknames.
Hi Jordyguin,
my opinion is that there is way too much read into perfectly normal behaviours for a boy of his age. Calling Louis a loose cannon or really anything else based on the fact that as the only child of that age sitting there in a sea of adults, he moves around a little more than his older siblings and makes a few faces, is totally overblown. Of course, it makes for entertaining headlines. That is the price he pays for being born into this family. But should he have to?
“That is the price he pays for being born into this family. But should he have to?”
You’re right, but he has no other choice. That’s the “burden” of a royal and the royals are still there and are loved and supported… Perhaps it could be viewed as not a price he has to pay but as something else?
Jordyguin,
you are exactly right, he has no other choice. In contrast to the adults who have the option to leave. Granted, leaving the royal family is not an easy option, but still. Louis is not even 10, he cannot just up sticks and vanish. So he is fundamentally defenceless, whereas the grown-ups know how to play the game. He enjoys privileges others do not, but as a child he has no say in that, and the love and support of the nation will not mean anything to him. Since these children did not actively choose their life, my stance is that it would be better to leave them alone as much as possible and not interpret every twitch of their mouth as some sort of grand revelation of their character.
Louis has no other choice. We do.
Hi Anna Plyance,
I think it depends mostly on tone and context. When Mr. Tudor calls Prince Louis…loose cannon Louis…I don’t hear anything insulting.
I don’t have any friends it applies to. If a friend behaved briefly like that or relayed a story about a moment where it applied, I think I would tease them with the term…
I am with Allison. Bemusement over calling out of something I would describe as inappropriate.
Hi Anna, if someone called me a loose cannon, I would take that as them trying to quiet me down and make me small. They’re to elevate themselves by belittling me. If its said in amusement, I would take it as passive aggressive. They’re using humor as a way to veil the insult. I don’t consider it a harmless nickname and the person who was saying it, I wouldn’t consider a friend.
AP, Allison, Bubbles, Leigh and Dani,
I think all of you have made good points in responding to AP’s question. I tend to agree with Dani, that is, the way that “loose cannon” is interpreted depends on tone and context.
I think that, in general, it’s a negative way to describe someone. It implies the person can’t be trusted or is unpredictable in a volatile or unreliable way.
If, for example, an adult was in a lighthearted social situation and said or did something unpredictable, someone else may laugh and say something like, “omg! You are such a loose cannon! I can’t believe you just said that!”
In this context, it’s not really an insult. It’s more of a harmless, spontaneous comment and it could still be friendly, in my opinion.
In a different example, if someone did something unpredictable, like for instance, decided to drive on the wrong side of the road or something like that, a passenger could angrily say, “Jesus! I’m never driving with you again! You are such a loose cannon that you could get us arrested or even killed!”
In this context, it’s more of an insult and it’s said in a derogatory way.
I think the extent of how negative the description is also depends on how often it’s used to describe someone.
For instance, HG has used the description “loose cannon Louis” just about every time he has spoken about Prince Louis in a YouTube video. It has almost become Louis’ nickname as far as HG is concerned.
If the nickname sticks – especially when it comes to a small child – it becomes a label and then the impression that people have of the child is difficult to shift or remove. I don’t think that’s healthy for a small child, especially in the case of Louis who is in the public eye and will be famous for the rest of his life.
Hi WN!
I hope you’re doing well.
Your comment about a loose cannon being unpredictable and untrustworthy is exactly why I think its a negative thing to say. Even in jest, I would find it insulting. To me it means a loose cannon has no self control.
While I’m not fond of the moniker “Loose Cannon Louis” because he’s a child and many children lack self control, it does explain his behavior. He’s unpredictable and let’s loose whenever he wants. As a child, Prince Louis still has a chance to outgrow his lack of self control. If an adult is lacking so much self control that they’re being described as a loose cannon, I’d say its a wrap.
Hi Leigh,
It’s lovely to hear from you. I’m well, thank you. Hope you’re doing well too.
It’s interesting how each one of us who has commented about the term “loose cannon” has their own perspective and each perspective can be quite different from the others.
I can see what you mean about it being insulting. To me though, if someone said it about me, I wouldn’t necessarily be insulted based on the words “loose cannon”. Instead, my thoughts about it would depend on the person’s tone; the person’s relationship to me; the context in which it was said; and whether it was meant to be insulting or whether it was said in a fun or lighthearted way, etc.
When I think about it more deeply, the thing that would bother me or irritate me would be if someone insisted I was a “loose cannon” even though I knew I wasn’t. If they believed I was a loose cannon and lacked self control based on one or two unpredictable things I said or did while ignoring the bigger picture of how I behaved most of the time, then their insistence and the misconception it created would certainly bother me.
I think there are different situations and contexts in which it could be interpreted in different ways.
Loose cannon Louis is such a cutie and entertaining little Prince who doesn’t give a shite what anybody thinks of him and his clearly strong personality already. Unpredictable and predictable in his loose cannon way, that whatever road his personality will decide upon, he will use all labels to his benefit letting whingers whinge dry.
As usual, an absolutely apt and accurate nickname, HG! Love it!
I agree Jordyguin, Prince Louis is a cutie and I also agree that he already has a strong and entertaining personality. He has made me smile and chuckle with his antics.
He’s only seven and he’s still a little kid. He has shown different sides of his personality and isn’t just a “loose cannon”.
I’ve seen him in situations where he has been serious and quite mature for his age. For example, there was a volunteering event two years ago attended by William and Kate and their children. It was the time when Louis sat on William’s lap as they drove a big yellow tractor. At that event, Louis pushed a wheelbarrow with soil in it and then he lifted it up to empty out the soil.
He was only five years old and he was mature and thoughtful for his age. He was focused on the tasks he was doing and showed self-control and initiative.
Maybe Louis gets bored when required to sit or stand still because he’s still a small child. When bored, he gets distracted and does things the media zoom in on. When he’s occupied or focused on a task instead, he doesn’t get bored or distracted.
By the way, Jordy, if you’re implying that I or anyone else is a whinger, you can keep whinging about it. No-one here is whinging. We’re all commenting, just like you are.
Whilst a distraction in order to control a child’s focus might not be beneficial at all for the small individual during brain development and rather hindering where it’s a through and throughout dumb task — task and occupation still doesn’t exclude boredom and commenting doesn’t exclude whinging, WiserNow.
Whilst others are indeed commenting for their own reasons, you seem to assert control via commenting and obtaining positive fuel and challenge-fuel via responses. Sometimes you have interesting observations to make and sometimes you whinge and are a hypocrite who contradicts herself. And fair enough why not, comment as much as you like, the Ultra is generous to everyone, though you seem not to appreciate it in moments when you berate him and tell him what would be better instead for him to produce his content about, what pictures to put as his icon and such like. You really seem to think that you know better what a man of HG’s intelligence and reach should do, do you? But linked to the issue of control it makes perfect sense.
Whilst appalled empaths may clash and comment in their emotional thinking outrage once or twice and don’t come back to do it again, you continue to do it for years. Back and forth, criticism, praise, whinge, complain, contradict, hypocrite, valid observations, nonsensical observations, devalue readers, draw them back in, malign hoovers, benign hoovers. You call it ‘commenting like everyone else here does’ but I don’t see longstanding readers having this type of a dynamic. So it’s not.
Hi, WN–
“The purpose of astrology is NOT to predict the future with some kind of isolated pinpoint accuracy.”
What is the purpose of it? And how do you know if the astrologer in question is incorrect or of poor quality?
Hi Allison,
The purpose of astrology is to gain a more structured understanding about the world and people and how and why things happen as they do.
Instead of a person living each moment or each day as though the things around them happen (or that people behave) with randomness and with no relation between one occurrence and another, astrology is a way to ‘see’ things as being or having a reason or basis for occurring.
By considering that there isn’t complete randomness in the things that happen or the way people behave, it is a way of better understanding how and why things ‘are’ and how they relate to other things. This is especially so in terms of certain time periods and social climates.
To me, it helps to better navigate certain situations or time periods or relationships when I know for example that someone is a certain sun sign or has a certain aspect in their birth chart or that Mercury is in retrograde for the next three weeks or that there is a full moon for the next two days.
I know it sounds like I’m basing my ‘understanding’ on amorphous and illusory concepts, however, when I read about planetary transits and personality traits of people according to astrology, and understand the meanings of these aspects, astrology helps me feel less like a ship tossed around in the ocean completely vulnerable to the currents and wind direction without having any sense of how and where to steer to gain direction in order to navigate the storm.
Also, the things I contemplate when I think about planetary transits or aspects in my birth chart are not obvious and absolute things. They are subtle and also subject to interpretation.
I’ll give you one particular example that helps to illustrate what I mean.
Some years ago, I was organising some overseas travel. Before I embarked on the trip, I found out that Mercury would be in retrograde during one part of my travels. When Mercury is in retrograde, it is said to have the effect of disrupting communications or travel plans or situations dependent on technology. The way to counter these kinds of interruptions is to be very prepared; to plan very carefully; to avoid new ventures and agreements; and to be more aware than usual of what could go wrong.
While planning my travels, I spent more time than most people would to pre-empt small details and to ensure that I had relevant maps; relevant travel cards and tickets; and prepaid for relevant accommodation, flights, tours and day-trips. Before embarking on the trip, I wanted as much as possible to be planned and in place.
During my travels, everything went well and smoothly for the most part. I had a fairly detailed itinerary; I followed my pre-laid plans and things progressed as I wanted and expected.
At one point during the trip, when Mercury’s retrograde was in full swing in the planet’s transit, I had a connecting short flight from Rome to another city in Europe. On that particular day, I was delayed in Rome for a day because there was some kind of industrial strike and it meant that people’s luggage was not being processed.
This disruption caused quite a big hiccup in my plans because the delay had a cumulative effect on where I was meant to be the next week. It affected my accommodation and the tour I was meant to commence.
Knowing that some kind of disruption was imminent during that particular time made it easier to recover from the delay and effectively change my plans. I wasn’t flustered or anxious about the disruption. I didn’t think ‘why me and why now?’ I just carried on and made an effort to make my communications with those at the airport and in the next location as clear and explanatory as possible.
You may think this example was just a coincidence and I can’t really convince you otherwise. The effect on me of pre-empting and planning for disruptions and difficulties, though, meant that I did not have as many disruptions and delays and when they did happen, I was more prepared and able to counter them.
To answer your question about how you can tell if an astrologer is incorrect or of poor quality…
I think it’s a good idea to do some research into the person’s work to get some idea of what they do, how they explain the concepts, how long they’ve been doing the work, whether they use terminology like houses, aspects, transits, elements, modality, rulerships, etc.
If a person uses terminology like ‘energy’ and ‘starsign’ and focuses on sun-signs without mentioning ascendant, descendant, moon-signs or other planet positions; or they ignore exact time and place of birth; or don’t know the meaning of houses or aspects, for example, then you can tell that their knowledge is superficial and basic.
Hi, WN–
Thank you for your detailed response. This type of thing is very interesting to me. My empathy when engaging with astrologers gives me a feeling like I’m talking to manipulators. I find the emotional empathy aspects unpleasant, but the cognitive aspects draw me in. As an interpersonal experience it interests me because they claim to understand things about me but the things they claim to understand are all things anyone might guess about a woman. And the language they use reminds me of Charles Manson; not as entertaining as he was but like they’re trying to direct my internal experience and hijack my feelings and thoughts through odd associations served with authority. They play the game of “Yes, and…”
I’m curious about why you credit Mercury retrograde to the incidents on your trip. Aren’t travel issues common, and especially so the more extensive the trips? About the only way to completely avoid hiccups would be to fly privately, and even then frustrating things can happen no matter how the planets are aligned. Also, isn’t Mercury’s retrograde a visual illusion? The orbit of the planet doesn’t actually change. How does that illusion have a tangible impact on the earthly experiences you describe?
Regarding evaluating an astrologer, are there standards against which to measure the person or the astrology? I see that it provides you with a framework for understanding people or events, but how does the way the planets appear actually work to influence life and people (I assume this operation would be the basis for your belief)? What if I moved to Mars–would I still be myself? Thank you for engaging.
You’re welcome, Allison.
I can understand that you feel like you’re talking to manipulators when engaging with astrologers. If I’m listening to someone on YouTube who makes videos about astrology, I tend to know or sense fairly quickly how knowledgeable they are and also their intentions in making the video in the first place.
So far, I haven’t spoken in person with any astrologers myself. I have learned about astrology mainly from books and other literature. The cognitive aspects draw me in as well, and now that you mention it, when I have contemplated the cognitive aspects, I can also relate them to emotional empathy aspects as well.
I have listened to a number of people on YouTube who make videos about the subject. There are two YouTubers in particular who I have learned from and I find that their information resonates.
You’re right that travel issues are common. I mentioned the example because the delay I experienced with the flight out of Rome occurred on the day Mercury’s retrograde was at its most intense – that is, on the day described as ‘Mercury retrograde station’. It was very coincidental that it happened to occur on that particular day.
You’re also right that Mercury’s retrograde is an optical illusion. It appears to move backwards from the vantage point of Earth even though the direction of its orbit is still moving forward.
Regarding your question of how Mercury’s retrograde has a tangible impact on earthly experiences, I can’t actually give you a definitive direct and logical answer, as I have explained also in a reply to HG.
I do know that I have experienced certain disruptions and delays with regard to information and administrative types of activities and communication during these retrogrades. The way it happens is that things that normally proceed smoothly, or happen in a certain expected way, tend to become time-consuming, convoluted, or wires get crossed leading to misunderstandings.
On the flipside of the same coin, when Mercury is in its retrograde phase, it is believed that anything you do or visit for a second time, like re-viewing, or re-evaluating, or re-working, will be successful. Also, if you turn your attention inwards to your inner thoughts or inner emotions or inner self-evaluation, the energy you spend that way will be more fruitful than the energy you spend outwardly.
I don’t know what would happen to you if you moved to Mars, Allison. That’s a total mystery to me. Although, I like the creativity of your question 🙂
The funny thing is that Mars in astrology is described as having a fiery, ‘hot’, and quick-tempered energy. In reality, Mars actually has a cold atmosphere. It makes me think that astrology is based on symbolism and assumption. Mars is a red planet and when looked at through a telescope it looks like its red colour translates to a hot atmosphere. Perhaps centuries ago, when the astrologers back then were contemplating the meanings behind planets and planetary movements, they assigned certain human interpretations and connotations to what they saw in the heavens.
Yes, astrology does give me a framework to understand certain things. It does that in a number of ways.
One way that the appearance and positions of planets can influence people and events is the way planets are positioned in relation to each other at certain times. The positioning between one planet and another is called an ‘aspect’. It’s a little complicated for one comment here, but, for example, the aspect between planets can be: conjunct (which means the two planets are very close to each other in the same sign); or trine (which means they are in signs of the same element; or sextile (meaning they are in complementary signs); or square (meaning they are in signs that are not complementary); or opposite (meaning they are directly opposite each other in the birth chart).
When you consider that each planet has a certain function or represents a certain kind of energy, when a particular planet is in a particular aspect with another planet, the functions or energies of the two planets interact with each other in ways that flow or are shaped by the nature of the aspect.
I can see that it’s quite a complex system of knowledge to grasp quickly. It has taken me time to contemplate and understand how it all works and what the different parts represent and how they interact, etc.
Thank you for your questions, Allison, and thank you for engaging with me also 🙂
“I can see that it’s quite a complex system of knowledge to grasp quickly.”
Actually it’s not. It’s easy to see through manipulation.
Planets were assigned influence on human lives (surprise) and it’s a one way street. The human is as usual a leaf in the wind and has to prepare and adapt to cosmic bodies, signs, gods, energies, who rule human’s cosmic complexion in order for them to figure out their little lives with absent meaning as they digress into dependency on all fronts, destroying their physical and mental health day by day, destroying their natural environment on which their sanity survival depends on, as they migrate to an artificial bot of abstract and fractured beliefs which AI currently recycles right, left and center, aspiring a new god status.
Doesn’t matter how old or ancient the teachings are, they fracture a main misbelief into many different beliefs. The more fractured the more confused and the better controlled and kept away from the simple realisation in front of them.
Ask yourself, what is it that even planets can’t influence?
To expand on Allison’s question:
What if Allison moved not just to Mars but to the opposite side of the galaxy, a different planetary system?
Planets: You wanted some Venus vibes to better up your interplanetary marriage? Nope, go back to Earth.
Allison: My husband is coming with me.
Husband: Wait babe, there is no Chungamunga in your solar system, it will be in retrograde this week.
Jordyguin,
So tetchy … and consistently too.
It sounds to me like your natal Mars may be in a difficult aspect to your natal Moon, perhaps?
Either that, or your natal Venus could be square to your natal Mars?
Alternatively, your natal Saturn may be square or opposite your natal Mercury?
Expressed differently, to me, your innate emotional and/or pleasure-seeking drives are clashing somewhat aggressively with your action-oriented and/or intellectual drives.
Without seeing your birth-chart, I can only guess though … 🙂
It sounds that the origin and purpose of Astrology is deeply rooted in Uranus.
NA drops mic and walks off stage! Hahaha.
Hey Sista had to drop and say Hi! 😘🤗
Dear NarcAngel,
Fabulous answer 🤣
Warmest of hugs to you, we miss you 💕
I’m interested to know if you have written on narcissism in children (offspring not necessarily minors!) The parent-child relationship is what I’m hoping to investigate. . . I’d like to read more in this area so if anyone can signpost me?
Hi jujoo,
Welcome to the blog. I have an adult daughter whose a narcissist, confirmed by Mr. Tudor. It can be difficult to navigate at times. Mr. Tudor has a product called, “How to Handle the Parental Narcissist”. I just substituted the word parental for child. This product was incredibly helpful. Its well worth it.
Mr. Tudor–
You detail in “William v Harry: Silent Strength v Ginger Whinger” the way that Harry’s narcissistic behaviors have been brought out by his wife. Catherine, PoW, being an empath has helped Prince William not go down the path of “Woe is me” (along with Prince William being a normal).
I think TOW is MMRB. She’s a crybaby…and she’s brought the inner toddler out in Harry.
1. How would different schools of narcissist differ in the behaviors they would bring out in an empath like Harry? How would a greater deal with his mommy issues? How would an Upper lesser handle it?
King Charles III and Camilla are both narcissists. Neither have emotional empathy for anyone. Assuming the adulterous duo didn’t shelve each other privately during the time of Charles and Diana divorcing…
2. How would the UMR (King Charles III) style of narcissism compliment the narcissism of a LMR (Camilla) as they dealt with the magnet empath Diana, Princess of Wales, giving her interview and the divorce? I look at this as the two of them having a common “enemy” in this situation. Is that how they would view it?
Thank you so much for your time! Much appreciation.
1. A Greater would exhibit False Compassion for his loss but would upbraid him for any wallowing. The Upper Lesser would say little about it during the golden period and then would mock his weakness in devaluation.
2. This requires a detailed response to address the various interactions between the parties.
Thank you so much, Sir. Much appreciation!
I was gone off-line on a trip and when I came back I had hoped to use your very generous discount on the knowledge fault. Unfortunately I can’t locate that video – I may have missed out 😔
I do hope it would please you (and suit you) to offer another discount soon 😊
In a recent interview as well as in the comments here there have appeared statements on the topic of God to the tune of : If God exists, how come he never helped me or other victims of abuse and allows all sorts of evil to happen? There is so much evil in this world, therefore God cannot exist or be a loving God etc.
My first reaction to that is, there are an awful lot of people who expect God to have all the time in the world for them, while they themselves see it as perfectly fair that they never have a minute’s time for God in their life.
Secondly, strangely enough, we do not usually see the flipside of this idea. I don’t hear those same people saying, Right now my life is great, it must be God’s doing. God seems to only ever receive the responsibility and blame for the negative. He is just there as the fall guy when things go wrong.
Thirdly, if God exists, he takes the concept of free will seriously. He has given us the freedom to choose, and that necessarily MUST include that we and the people around us suffer the consequences of our actions. If God micromanaged us and took away the effects of human behaviour on others, be they good or bad, that would not only make him a liar, it would make him a narcissist. We would all live in one gigantic Lack-Of-Control Environment. He does not operate in the way the question of why God allows evil to happen implies, namely: “I supposedly created you in my image, but I do not trust you to make any decision that actually would have ramifications.” That is how you treat a toddler at most, not a grown-up. To be able to learn, our actions need to have consequences. Whatever you classify as evil, it is caused by humans exercising their free will.
I realise this is not an explanation apt to bring comfort to victims of abuse or crime.
Then again, it is interesting that people are so quick to blame God, when in a situation with comparable parameters they are quite happy to assume the opposite position. Take this blog. HG is basically in the position of God here. He created it, he decides which comments go through and which ones do not make the cut, he redacts comments in accordance with his house rules, he can permanently exclude people who misbehave. And nobody knows the rules he has set for his own behaviour. Yet does he get blamed for the appearance of a particularly idiotic comment or the discussion that might follow? No, because we recognise that the author of the comment bears the responsibility for its content and readily assume, with good reason, that HG sees some purpose in publishing it. We do not know what he has sifted out, apart from our own unpublished comments, because that is his business and his prerogative. We do not know what his five rules are, we only know that they exist. By the same token, none of us know what God has done or not done to protect us and what his specific rules are, yet we decide that it is our business and that we know best (and usually the ones who most want to pin the blame on God are those who believe the least, but that is another conversation).
While it is true that this God, if he exists, allowed the people around you to abuse you, HG, and I understand that you can never forgive that, we have no way of knowing if he protected you from having to experience even worse things. What we do know is that this God, if he exists, also allowed you to grow up into the remarkable man you are today.
Anna, this is a great comment and observations! Loved reading this!
“My first reaction to that is, there are an awful lot of people who expect God to have all the time in the world for them, while they themselves see it as perfectly fair that they never have a minute’s time for God in their life.”
What are your further thoughts on; what is it that God actually wants from us?
God must be tired of prayers and “give me this, give me that, give, give give… and if I’ll receive I will really believe in you.”.
Didn’t God give us everything already?! What is it that people still want and what do they pray for?
Me, obviously.
“Me, obviously.”
That made me laugh so much!!! Love you!!!
And here you are! SCORE!
See, God clearly loves us.
Of course I do, in my own way.
There you go blowing your cover! And you were doing so well with the hate thing! Who is going to believe that now when you have given it to us in writing that you love us, in your own way?
Of course, it’s probably beneficial to widen your horizon and try new ways of doing this love thing every couple of thousand years or so. All roads lead to Rome. But let’s not make you out to be older than you are. You are at least 20, 30, heck, 50 years too young for that!
Hello Jordyguin,
if we presuppose that we are at all able to find out what God wants from us and going by the Bible, the basic answer would be what is written in Luke 10:27: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind and, Love your neighbor as yourself.” Where it gets complicated is determining what this entails. Loving somebody means always wanting what is best for them. Who gets to decide what that is though?
Loving our neighbour means first finding out who our neighbour is. It should be everybody, but as soon as we come to practical steps, we have to decide which neighbour to focus on at that moment. Very seldom is it as clearcut as seeing somebody fall and helping him up.
We only have our own understanding as a guide, and since God made us this way, we have to be content with that and assume that it is enough. It is always possible that what we deem loving will not be interpreted as loving by God or our neighbour. We may feel compelled to help somebody out of love and compassion, but if we repeat that too regularly and reliably, it can create a state of dependency and permanent reliance on others in the recipient of our help, and in the worst case, opportunity for exploitation, just as HG describes it in the “Psychopath: Compassion” article. Not helping someone can be just as much an expression of love as helping. We just have to accept that we often do not know whether our choice in that moment was the right one.
I do not believe that God ever tires of receiving our prayers, because prayer is just another word for talking to God, and it does not even require words. I think he always welcomes it if we talk to him. We can ask for anything, but God is not an automaton, where you put something in and get something in return. And he cannot be bargained with à la “If I receive, I will believe in you”. Talking to God should not be a one-way street either. I cannot say that I have felt God talk to me directly, but I take what is written in the Bible as intended for all of us. I do not expect God to repeat himself for every single human that has ever lived, that is what writing down stuff is for, just like here on the blog. HG writes it down, so everyone can read and apply it to their own life.
There are many studies about the effects of prayer, but if you delve deeper into it, you will find problems with most of them. The ones about the effect of our prayers on our own health show clear benefits, but you get similar results for meditation or some other form of contemplation. The interesting part would be the effects of our prayer on somebody else. The famous 2006 Harvard STEP study (“Study of the Therapeutic Effects of intercessory Prayer”), where the group of patients who knew for sure that some strangers were praying for them (for a successful cardiac bypass procedure without complications and a speedy recovery) actually experienced more complications than the other groups, has two substantial problems for me: Not only were the volunteers who did the praying forced to include a prescribed sentence in every prayer, but the patients were also informed about a link to prayer. Two groups were told that they “may or may not receive prayer”, the third group, the one which then had a higher rate of complications, was told they would receive prayer. So what they measured was not the effect of prayer itself, but rather the effect of a patient’s knowledge that someone was praying for them, which is something quite different.
In contrast, in 2001 Columbia University did a study with around 200 women who had unsuccessfully tried to become pregnant and were now undergoing IVF treatment, this time without informing either the patients or their doctors. The group of women who had people praying for them had a 50 percent pregnancy rate compared to a 26 percent rate in the group of women who did not have people praying for them. As you would expect, there have been numerous attempts to discredit this study in the scientific community, but from the little I have read I did not see any issues that would cause the whole study to appear questionable.
Anna, thank you for expanding and what an interesting study indeed. It is about the power of words and reminds me of Masaru Emoto’s water crystals and how words impact on our body by coding the fluid component…
I agree, loving someone means that you want the best for them. What God could possibly want from us is like what a parent would want from their child, right? I don’t have a child but it would appear to me that I would want to see my child fulfilled. In order for him or her to find fulfillment I would need to provide at the outset an environment which would cover the needs for a healthy upbringing and the rest is up to the individual and his or her choices…
“Love thy neighbor as thyself” is also a crucial phrase you mentioned. First one needs to find out what is love for oneself in order to know how to love the neighbour, I would say. The basics… how do we treat our physical machine which does so many things for us, what do we put into it? How do we maintain its energy, flexibility, curiosity and so on? And our minds? What kind of information we put into our minds will form our understanding of love. So the love resulting for our neighbour can only result from the way we treat ourselves…
And the way we treat ourselves probably has a lot to do with how our parents treated us during the formative years, so there we are.
Though I must add that the brain’s plasticity doesn’t always bend to the environmental preset and has variations in situ.
Hello, Anna,
I’m not religious and I don’t believe in GOD (I used to though), not because he didn’t give me something or took someone from me, just more I read, travelled, talked to different people, then more I was convinced there is simply nothing there. No heaven, no hell, at least. Maybe Hell does exist, but here at planet Earth at some places.
I was in Kyoto couple weeks ago, shrines and I learned about religion called Shinto. If I decide to believe in some religion, this is the one I choose. There is no concept of GOD there, no books with strict rules, no teaching about afterlife. Such concept appeals to me and to half of Japanese population.
Per my observation, people believe in GOD, or Allah or other gods, in general, for the following main reasons (unconsciously):
– not to take a responsibility for their actions, ofc it’s easier to blame someone for own failure.
– not to take an action and a risk to change anything in their life they are not satisfied with. It’s easier to assume this life is a “draft” and all you have to do is to pray and go to church, so then after death you would have an ideal life and be rewarded for unhappy life on Earth.
– not to feel lonely. Many feel lonely and not understood by others. So when there is someone to talk to and he/she (can be female GOD in some religions) is always on your side, sees all your suffering and accepts you the way you are, it provides some comfort.
Obviously religious people are easier to control by applying fear and promise of better future. Die Religion ist das Opium des Volkes.
I might be wrong, so I guess, I would go to Hell then. A lot of famous people must be there, so it won’t be boring at least.
Hello Lilu150325,
it is not my place or intent to proselytise, you believe whatever you want to believe.
Karl Marx’s claim that Religion ist das Opium des Volkes does not hold water. Religious people do report greater satisfaction with their life and higher general levels of happiness, with small but interesting differences among the different religions and those belonging to no religion being the least happy (https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2016/02/02/office-for-national-statistics-well-being-data_n_9138076.html), so you might say religion has a drug-like effect, especially since religious people have lower rates of “classical” drug taking. But religious people also have higher life expectancies, which is hardly something you will find with opium addicts. And you would expect opium addicts to spend their life in some drug-induced haze, whereas actively religious people not only have higher participation rates in nonreligious voluntary organisations, they are also more likely to vote than non-religious people (https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2019/01/31/are-religious-people-happier-healthier-our-new-global-study-explores-this-question/). From the data it looks more like Atheismus ist das Opium des Volkes.
I am not at all sure I would find that the presence of lots of famous people would make Hell LESS boring.
Hello, Anna 😊
Thank you for a reply. I missed it, just now noticed. Probably, I should not have even posted my comment, cause based on my experience topics such as politics and religion are best to avoid to discuss. Those two beliefs (political and religious) are usually so rigid in any person (patriotism is at the top of core beliefs- being convinced that one’s country is the best, no matter what), so it’s almost impossible to alter the opnion. It should be something major to happen for that, outside factor. Plus such discussions can lead to downright insults, when arguments are run out, or even a fight.
But anyway, I’m glad for you that you are happier than me, because you are religious and I’m not. By Opium, I meant not that people are slightly high from praying or talking to GOD, I mean their critical thinking is reduced. They are easier manipulated to do things (for example, invade other territory) if the task has a divine purpose. “GOD directed me to do that”. And I’m atheist, not by choice. I just can’t. I used to believe, but smth broke in me and I stopped. Similarly to what I feel now about love, after reading Mr Tudor’s work. I just can’t fall in love anymore, like I used to. I see men differently now, their intentions.
My mother is very religious, she keeps saying to me – go to church and pray, GOD will help you. I don’t argue with her, just listen and saying yes, I will. But ofc, I won’t. Even the fact (want to curse here), that I should put a cover on my head before entering the Church (Ortodox demands that all women should cover head) makes me angry. Why on Earth women should do that and men not? Women are not allowed to go to certain areas in the church and men can… and it’s because all these rules came not from GOD, but from men who wrote them to control women. I know Catholic/Protestantism Christianty is different, but still Bible, Quran etc all were written by men.
And I don’t vote, because in my country, the outcome is predetermined and obvious. Though I’m actually taking the risk, cause it’s frowned upon on people who don’t vote, and my boss asked me last year why I didn’t go, I had to lie , came up with some excuse.
Hello Lilu150325,
thank you for your answer. Your point about reduced critical thinking is interesting. In centuries past we have certainly seen that pattern of using a supposed divine purpose to manipulate people into doing things. The Crusades come to mind. In the 20th century, though, we have seen totalitarian systems such as the Nazis or Soviets try to erase Christianity and other religions and replace them with their own pseudo-religion. They were rightly afraid that religious people would not agree with their ideology and work actively against them. In Germany, for example, the Protestant church split into two branches, the Deutsche Christen or German Christians who toed the party line, and the Bekennende Kirche or Confessing Church. The Bekennende Kirche rejected Nazi control over their religion (whilst still accepting or tacitly endorsing parts of their ideology), especially the so-called Arier-Paragraph or Aryan Paragraph which was the law that no person of Jewish descent could hold public office and other posts, including the clergy, which would effectively have nullified a Christian baptism. Subsequently, many of their pastors were arrested. Some of the leaders were sent to concentration camps, such as Dietrich Bonhoeffer and Martin Niemöller. Niemöller survived 7 years there, later he became famous for a few poignant lines that are gaining prominence in the US right now:
“First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out, because I was not a socialist.
Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out, because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out, because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak for me.”
You will not find me endorsing the Orthodox churches, especially the way the Russian Orthodox church serves as Putin’s stooge in dehumanising Ukrainians and sanctions all sorts of crimes against them in the service of that little man’s delusions of grandeur. I have met the odd Orthodox priest, and they were some of the most xenophobic hypocrites I know. Claiming to be civilized people while treating foreigners as subhuman. And any religious organisation that aims to keep its members ignorant by discouraging them from doing their own study of their sacred texts, claiming they need a priest as envoy between the believer and their God and using archaic languages to exclude the majority of believers from reading and understanding their doctrine is on the same level as any other ideology that thrives on ignorance.
Hello Anna,
I’ve discovered a way to find the replies at the blog. Hurray!
Thank you for your comment.
My opinion, that nowdays the world doesn’t need Nazi to erase critical thinking. Media is doing it. People tend to have more and more polarized view on everything: religion, politics, party they support, climate change, etc.
With internet came an ease access to information and ability to choose the source.
With so much variety, people (not all) tend to choose only channels and news, which support their view. It led to many live in some type of an information bubble. Plus attention span is reduced, so information should be condensed and provocative to attract. And on top, in general, people start reading less due to other alternatives available to fill your mind – movies, SM, video games etc. So when faced with opposite, alternative view or unexpected ourcome, the reaction is shock, anger, aggression (an example would be Trump victory). Often immediately insults start flying. You are with us or you are against us. That’s it. Nothing in-between.
And ofc, media is a great tool of manipulation of public opinion. Especially when it comes to politics both internal and external. All major news outlet in the world is lying, pushing certain agenda. It’s easier to see/notice if you know other languages and use VPN. Like for example, if you know one language , you are fed only information which is filtered to form a particular opinion in you to serve someone’s goal at the top. And it’s the same everywhere.There are some independent channels, but they are rare and unpopular, cause it forces you to think not in black/white terms. And I’m not defending anyone, no one is saint when it comes to politicians, especially for countries which have some influence in political arena. Maybe the presidents of small countries are not Narcissists. Like Maldives, for example, he is engineer and removed foreign military presence in his country.
There is a video in Asylum of Grotesque, where HG is saying to his IPPS that not everyone should vote. Oddly, I tend to agree with HG on this one. Though what criteria to choose is difficult. It should be someone who loves their country, have long term vision, can connect prices of goods and services to external policy. Although, it makes sense only in countries where voting do matter. “If voting made any difference, they wouldn’t let us do it”.
Anyway, back to your message.
“In centuries past we have certainly seen that pattern of using a supposed divine purpose to manipulate people into doing things. The Crusades come to mind.” Yes, agree.
And yes, in Soviet Union, as in Germany, many churches were completly burned down and priests were shot at spot, burned with a church, some were arrested and sent to camps, though it has risks. Btw, in Ukraine, the church is also split now, and some priests were arrested, not by Russians. It’s a tragedy what is going on there.
“First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out, because I was not a socialist.
Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out, because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out, because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak for me.” beautifully said, and yes, it’s common thinking, based on fear and hope. I read some books on survivors of Gulag and Lefortovo prison. They closed the eyes and hoped it would pass them. Not all though, some did try to rebel, but were quickly and brutally broken by the system. My ancestors (grand grand and grand parents) went through a lot of things, including genocide. It’s pure luck that I actually exist. It’s a long story for another occasion.
On priests, though I’m not religious, there are good priests among Orthodox too, who are humble and help people. Perhaps, not in major city churches, but in a small towns, where less money and politics involved. Btw, do you know why Orthodox Christmas is on Jan 7th and Catholic on Dec 25th? When I found out the reason, it was one of this drops towards making me refuse my home religion.
Hello Arya0901,
you have some excellent points about the media and how easy it is to live in our own information and opinion bubble. We do not even have to make a conscious choice to restrict ourselves to opinions which do not challenge our own, the algorithms do it for us. Youtube and other platforms constantly direct us towards similar content to the one we are consuming, they actively promote uniformity of opinion within these bubbles and work against people straying outside of them. If you want to hear a different opinion, you have to make an effort to find one. If you only click on the recommended content, you will go in circles. On top of that, the anti-social media platforms promote radicalisation and ever more extreme opinions and behaviours, the more extreme and/or narcissistic the better it will be placed. Balanced views and nuanced discussion are not rewarded by their algorithms.
While I agree that practically every news outlet will have a certain slant (in public broadcasting they mostly slant to the left, although what is considered left-wing in the US would still be hard right wing in many European countries), I think it is wrong to state that all major news outlets are lying. Public broadcasters and quality newspapers in Europe have large fact-checking departments, in some countries they are legally obligated to represent both sides of the aisle, sometimes to the point of ridiculousness. Their political views become visible not through active lying but by their selection and priorities of topics to report on and by their choice of interviewees.
Believing that all major news outlets lie is a form of falling for a political lie as well. But if you have grown up with, say, Russian media, I certainly understand how you would form that view, because they have not had independent news media for any length of time. When a news outlet names itself “Truth”, you should always become suspicious, no matter the language. Putin has cracked down heavily on what independent reporting there was. If you take the Kommersant, for example, it used to be a reputable and reliable paper for economic and business news, if largely unknown to or ignored by the vast majority of the public. Nowadays they cannot even report the price of cabbage without government interference. There simply is no reliable reporting anymore, because they are prohibited from reporting at all about so many issues.
In my country, public media are strongly protected against direct government influence, the newsroom is not answerable to political figures and their finances are kept away from political interference as much as possible through long-term arrangements and the structure of the commission which decides on the overall budget. No president or prime minister can have a journalist fired for their opinion. If they tried, they would run a bigger risk of losing their job than the journalist, because there would be a public outcry. Any political slant they have is their own. There is a certain amount of self-selection by political views, but that reflects the opinions of the editors, not the party in power. If they were influenced by government dictat, you would necessarily see a change in their reporting and different personnel after a change in government, but this is not the case. They have always had the same slant.
Which is one reason why Fox and other right-wing outlets were created in the first place. The US have had Republican presidents and/or majorities for most of their history. If the big media outlets toed the majority party line, there would have been no need to establish a whole universe of right-wing channels. Fox and others have been created to counter what their founders saw as left-wing bias in a country where the majority is reliably right wing.
I have observed that people in Russia tend to assume that, because their own laws are not worth the paper they are written on and nobody in power is ever held accountable, this is the same all over the world. That is simply not the case. Our Constitutional Court, for example, regularly comes out with verdicts which cause huge headaches for the government. Our new government just passed the budget for 2025, halfway through the year the money is meant for and about a year late to what is the usual practice, because the budget drafted by the previous one had been declared unconstitutional, which caused a coalition break-up and an early election.
Creating the impression that the rest of the world ignores the law in the same way the Russian government does is in their interest to keep the population from rebelling.
Marx’s opium line gets a bit of a raw deal. He was primarily condemning the faults he saw in society that made people so unhappy that they needed to seek out ways to find meaning and feel better. He was also concerned that religious belief would give disempowered people a false sense of peace and security and therefore lessen the likelihood they’d rise up and fight for better conditions.
The full quote:
‘Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people’
Anna:
‘Religious people do report greater satisfaction with their life and higher general levels of happiness, with small but interesting differences among the different religions and those belonging to no religion being the least happy’
I am not surprised. If I thought someone was watching over me and caring about me and guiding the course of the world and all the people in it and I’d get to see all the people and pets I’ve lost during my life again after I die, I’d find that very comforting and no doubt I’d be happier. I don’t believe it because I cannot, but I admit I’d likely be happier if I could.
Hello annaamel,
Marx “was also concerned that religious belief would give disempowered people a false sense of peace and security and therefore lessen the likelihood they’d rise up and fight for better conditions.”
The numbers say he was wrong on that front like on so many others, at least today. As I said before, actively religious people not only have higher participation rates in nonreligious voluntary organisations, i.e. volunteering apart from and on top of what they do through their religious organisations, they are also more likely to vote than non-religious people. That means they are the ones who are on aggregate more likely to actually do something to bring about better conditions than atheists. And what he calls a false sense of peace and security for disempowered people is probably not all that false, because I would wager that within their religious community they are far more likely to receive help and opportunities to better their lot in life than by relying on state-run services.
True belief is not something you can force, and of course the whole concept is utterly illogical. I do believe, but if you were to ask me five minutes later, you might get a different answer, because I recognise that there is no logical reason and nothing provable to it. But that is just the nature of the beast, believing in this case is pretty much the opposite of knowing. You believe or you don’t, or you do both at the same time.
Lilu: pick up the Case for Christ. I am Christian and Jesus is my truth but I am of the belief that God appeared to others in other religions. Look at the timeline and many follow the same creed of love. Shinto is a beautiful religion and I have met many kind loving people following it. It’s the Light. I don’t believe in hell. I believe in disconnection from the Light. I know there is life after death. I also feel evil turns into nothingness. I also believe God works through people. But that’s just me! I think it’s important securely to a society too to have people want to be good. Even atheists see the rationale or logic in that.
Hello Contagious,
Appreciate your reply. Wanted to be good and being religious are two different things for me. I found it’s a bit hypocritical and twisted logic most religious people have, like they want to be good and do good things, so they can earn/secure some hot spot at Heaven. So if, imagine, an absolute proof is discovered that there is no GOD and no afterlife and no karma. You can do whatever you want without being punished later by Devil, or being a cockroach at next life, so what would happen then? Only restrictions which left would be Law.
Would all those good, kind people stop being good? If yes – then they were not good at the first place, if no – then religion doesn’t make a person good. It’s not relevant to a person actions. Moral beliefs, empathy, sympathy are. And they can come from upbringing, genes or culture. Anyway. I know that I don’t know everything, so I might be wrong.
Lilu: I agree with you and thank you for your reply. People are not their governments. People are not their religious leaders or institutions either. Belief is deeply personal and in my belief it should be respected whether you believe in a God(s) or not including the Jedi belief or animism… all… all people deserve love and respect . But…Jesus was real in history. Overwhelming proof if you believe in any history ( see various citations in Case for Christ) but was he a man or the son of God? But look at his message as it toppled regimes such as Rome… and it continues to be the largest religion in the world to this very day. Why? This Jewish man or son of God, this Jesus rebelled against the times, he pulled the rug under society at the time, he challenged and criticized the “ church”, the government, the tax system etc…. Jesus spoke of LOVE. His messages were radical for the times… but people listened and followed… love. Some were tortured and died for it, for love, for their love of Jesus or God. His messages: The meek shall inherit the Earth, give up your worldly possessions as God is not interested in money or power but who you are, God is love. Learn to forgive. Take care of the elderly and the sick. Jesus healed. Forgive …even your enemies. Turn the other cheek for the sake of peace ( Or as we know in the Middle East it’s hundreds of years of nonstop warfare), let the children come forward ( at the time children were not treated like children or considered important ), do not cast the first stone ( judge) in a case of adultery but sin no more, redeem yourself, Jesus washed the feet of a prostitute, he was hung in a cross among a thief and a murderer and his message was to BOTH forgiveness, redemption and love. His message was it’s not too late to redeem yourself even a murderer. When brutally tortured by skilled Roman torturers he said “ forgive them for they know not what they have done.” He fed, he preached love, he had no material desires, if he had a vice in todays world …. he did eat animals and fish and drank wine lol. My issue is not the church, they are just men. But I don’t think Christ was a madman and his message was love and love is the message why people go to church. To love and to be loved. Now man ruins it. Yup. Utterly destroys it but you could call it the truth or call it an ideal. What is wrong with what he said? . Some seek it if Christian…most. Others don’t. They turn away from the very message. If Jesus said to love one another…he could love … he provided it with an offer redemption to anyone… to ALL… how radical for the times: to gentiles, Roman’s, hookers, other civilizations, to adulterers, thieves, murderers, and even enemies who tortured and killed him… then who are we to judge???? But we do …and without offering love or redemption even in the church/religions. But other than say St Francis of Assisi, also a historical real man… and a few others. …Who could truly live up to these ideals in today’s world? But should we TRY? Great ideals. Buddha too. How many actually reach Nirvana? Cause no harm unto others … love with a different context…Look at Tibet. Hindus don’t eat cows as gentle people…but then a girl raped is in a bus but a group of men? She is guilty as no male escort? Muslims must give Zagat ( sorry if spelling wrong) or charity and many contribute to society. I could go on. But maybe whether you believe or not, but to me , Jesus is a good example to follow or to be like Mother Catrini to achieve good for many. That’s why even atheists or some will say Christian values are good for planet Earth. Not the people.Government is good for people unless you truly are a libertarian or anarchist. Religion is a great comfort and joy and standard for many with many good messages or even parables. Not just my personal absolute choice as I have absolute Faith and I have my reasons but in general….?
Interesting, Lilu. Before I get to your comments regarding Mr. Tudor, do you enjoy the trappings of Orthodoxy at all despite being an unbeliever? I still do, especially the candles and incense. And I miss confession and the horrifically lurid stories in the Synaxarion on the lives (and especially deaths) of the saints. And I was really good at the chanter’s stand.
Regarding HG’s work–I’m in the same mind as you when it comes to love and the impact of Mr. Tudor’s materials, but less so regarding how other people’s intentions affect me (not entirely absent, though). That incredible feeling when I say “I love you” has become questionable for me. Does the love only live in my pleasure of saying it? What is it? Do I feel “real” love? Has it all been a lie? I find I use the word a lot; after learning here I’m noticing it every time. I find many of HG’s writings emotionally difficult in that regard because I’ve been taught that love, especially romantic love, is everything. It’s The Answer.
But what if it isn’t? If love is All, how come it never works out? Why does it never solve me? What am I seeking? HG really makes me think because I had no understanding before of the narcissist’s perspective, or the psychopath’s. I find him a great help and a savior. I didn’t know before that there were legitimate possibilities other than love.
I think when I say I love someone I usually mean something closer to “I hold you in unconditional positive regard, and I want good things for you”, or “I feel bright sadness and desire for you”, or “What you’re doing makes me feel incredibly turned on”. However, my love always starts to go awry the moment I begin managing that person’s socks. Is there a greater killer of love than the domesticity of laundry?
I’m of the old opinion that Hell is other people.
Allison, hi love! Love is the answer… (you see what I did there)
I think it’s just the invisible mercy by which humanity is kept at a hand length from the recognition of the barbaric acts they perform everyday towards each other and life on earth, calling it love or progress. The mercy spares the realisation of the full horror which would make humans lose their last bits of sanity otherwise…
“do you enjoy the trappings of Orthodoxy at all despite being an unbeliever? I still do, especially the candles and incense.”
You would have loved Kyiv Pechersk Lavra and the monastery cavern system under it! I had a fascination for it as a child. It was open to everyone and a very mystic place. The Ukrainian government closed access to it, harassed the monks and the orthodox christians, and this year the Ministry of Culture’s commission, accompanied by police, broke the locks on the doors to the Near and Far Caves and replaced them with their own.
Kyiv Caves Lavra is one of the oldest historically important places which played a role in ukrainian-russian culture.
I’d like to visit it. I especially love cavern systems. I’ve also want to go see Holy Fire.
Hello, Allison,
The part about the socks made me laugh))) No, in my case, managing dirty socks has not been a killer of my love. Other things have.
Church.
Yes, ofc, I find the interior, candles, smell, icons, gold etc very beautiful. If you mean by Confession, like in movies: person sits behind a black curtain saying:” Dear Father, please forgive me, since I’ve sinned”. No, I have never done it. My relationship with Church can be best described and summarized via Russian parable:
“When the person was a child, his grandmother always told him: “Grandson, when you grow up and feel troubled in your heart, go to the church, you will always feel better there.”
The person grew up, and at some point life became unbearable for him. He remembered his grandmother’s advice and went to the church. As he entered, someone approached him and said, “You’re holding your hands wrong!” Another person ran up: “You’re standing in the wrong place!” A third one grumbled: “You’re dressed wrong!” Someone from behind corrected him: “You’re crossing yourself wrong!” Then a woman approached and said:
— You should leave the church, buy a book on how to behave here, and then come back.
The person left the church, sat on a bench, and began to cry bitterly. Suddenly, he heard a voice:
— Why are you crying, my child?
The person lifted his tear-streaked face and saw Jesus Christ. He said:
— Lord! They won’t let me into the church!
Jesus embraced him and said:
— Don’t cry, they haven’t let me in there for a long time either.”
But as I said before, I used to be a believer, my daughter was baptized. All my relatives are religious, I don’t tell anyone that I don’t believe in God, only my daughter knows. If I do tell, it results in unnecessary dialogues sometimes, where a person tries to persuade/covert me with various proofs.
Faith.
My erosion of faith was gradual. It involves certain books I read and certain events in my life. Though, once I was flying and our plane got into air pit, all of a sudden it became very quiet. Next second, a plane started a free fall. Fortunately, I was buckled up. I thought, that’s it, and I did cross myself. So maybe a believer somewhere deep down inside me.
Love.
Oh.. I totally on board with you on that one. What you said, the questions, I agree. I feel lost. I thought I knew what is love, but now I have doubts. I have fallen in love about 20 times in my life, like really hard, and each time, thought my feelings are forever. Some of those were mutual, some – not, some I thought mutual, but later turned out – not. I just know 100% that I love my children. But in terms of men, something has changed. I’m in dating mode right now. And sometimes I get this very familiar sensation initially towards someone, but then I start to analyze his words, never done that it before: why he said that? Is it flattery? Why he texts me that much? Etc etc. Idk, maybe I became paranoid and overreacting after learning about Narcissism. A simple example:
“He: Good morning, my … girl
Me: don’t say “my” and don’t call me “girl”
He: what? Why?
Me: cause I’m not yours and I’m not a girl, I’m a woman.
He: did you wake up in a bad mood today?
Me: No, I’m in an excellent mood.
He: okay.. ( then conversation continues about smth else).
Idk, maybe it is a bit off.
But I did recently, a narc detector on my 2nd husband, and Mr Tudor identified him as a Narcissist. And now I have a strong suspicion, that my 1st husband was also a Narc, cause it explains some things, to which I didn’t have an answer before. And prior to him, it was also Narc, 99% sure. Other short interactions were also narcissists, I think (one of them was confirmed by ND too). If it’s true, it totally sucks. It means I have never had a normal relationship and have never been truly loved. I’m still processing it. I hope this current period would pass.
Hi, Lilu–
Thank you for your thoughtful response.
Like you I’ve been through the ND process and looking back I see many people who were likely narcissists. They were my intense experiences. I don’t want to know the exact number (I do know it but I keep it a secret from myself) but fortunately I’m such a saint I didn’t go to bed with all of them. Let’s just say I’ve loved too many to be proud of but not enough to be ashamed of. It’s such an awful thing to want them. Sometimes my revulsion makes them more enticing if I go to certain places in my head. I may not be a healthy girl.
When I first started learning here I got really sad thinking about all the non-normal relationships I’ve had. For instance, I’ve never been on a real date or in that period where people talk for a while as romantic potentials and move into a relationship. Nothing stepwise for me. I have some Quick Calms now I go to when I’m feeling down about it. I actually think my grief is for what “should” be. I imagine life would be so much easier if I were normal in that department, and I feel sad out of a sense of failure. I see my friends and most of them are still in long marriages or other romantic relationships and I wish I were like that.
But I realize that doesn’t really make sense; the truth is my stats as a wife and girlfriend are terrible. Not that I’m unfaithful or a real problem, but at some point I just don’t like that version of myself. I start to lose myself. I need more time on my own, but with the assurance of reliable interaction. I want an impossible balance between chaos and calm. I’m no good as someone’s every day carry. Being an empath makes it trickier for me because I worry that I’m selfish; I feel emotionally distant while being prone to deep emotion. “I feel all the time like a cat on a hot tin roof”.
I wish I could just say to someone: “Okay, let’s be cool to each other. I need you to be brilliant and engaging. Every 4 to 6 weeks or so we’ll go into that room over there, really get down like fiends, and I’ll be your total slave. In between I’ll hang out with friends and enjoy my work, you’ll do whatever or whoever you do, then you can pick me up again for a good fight between the sheets. And I’ll never have to meet your cousins or something. No socks or anniversary greeting cards. Got that? Good then. Would you hand me my bra?”
It’s all so contradictory and confusing in me. I think my mistake has been that I’ve tried to build my need for the intensity of the sexual act into something more because I want to be a good person. It can’t just be that I’m that basic. I don’t like to admit it but for me maybe sex = love = sex in the moment. Perhaps I take the 3 percent of the time where my girly hormones make me soft, needy, and weepy and fluff that into an entire edifice to avoid being base. But, I think that’s part of why I’ve attracted narcissists because sex is a powerful tool for them to wield on me. Then I feel bad about it and try to be a good woman and I start going soft when the chemistry kicks in. At times I’ve tried to escape feeling anything by taking up with idiots so there would be no chance of mental beauty catching me, but that’s no fun.
I think I may be terrified of being truly loved, in the sense of someone caring deeply for me. That could be the seed of my addiction to narcissists. Deep down I know they can’t feel that for me. I know I’m there to do a job for them. I have a purpose. I just want to have a purpose. That’s a type of security. Though I crave it sometimes, I’m uncomfortable with the threat of genuine, lasting closeness. I push it away. I relish the language and appearance of intimacy, but I only want just a taste. I don’t like the morning, and the horror of holding hands over coffee.
I don’t know what to do with too much normal. If I hit my thumb with a hammer I need to be left alone, not for a lover to kiss it. I need to do the grocery shopping on my own. I need someone to come close and stay away at the same time. I need us to be kind to each other while we stay in our lanes. After a night of fierce coupling I need us to pass each other on the street with barely a nod. I need secrets. I need to be a secret. I need my own house, my own money. I need active reminders of benign unconcern. I need a mixture of unnatural heat and cold.
But people have taken me a certain kind of way that I don’t like when I’ve tried to have this, i.e. if I’m fine with not being the only one then that says something is weak about me. I just want two completely opposite experiences, bound up in one person without things getting drastic. Sure. I want to be claimed but on my own, beaten but not crushed, free and chained at the same time. I want to be killed with kindness. As the song says I want happiness in slavery. I wish God existed so I could have my miracle.
Hello Allison:
Ever think love is the journey not the destination? Have you ever considered just pure hate as a comfortable way of existing day to day? Or is Hell really the absence of light. Why is God the Light? What does Light mean? To me…? Love, love , love… it is defined in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. Is hate an alternative? Flip side of love? What do you get by hate? Note: look at war and urs effects. What’s wrong with peace? In scientific….dark matter that does not emit, absorb or reflect light yet it is shown to have an effect . Is evil the devil? or hate ? or maybe scientific or just a Black Hole or regions of space where gravity is so strong that nothing, not even light, can escape from them. They form from the remnants of massive stars that collapse under their own gravity after exhausting their nuclear fuel. Is evil or hate just Dark Matter or a form of matter that does not interact with electromagnetic forces, meaning it doesn’t emit, absorb, or reflect light. It is inferred from its gravitational effects on visible. Why do
Black Holes exist ? yet current science says they play a role in galaxy formation and dynamics. Love v Evil? God v. Satan? ????
And Dark Matter affects the structure and formation of the universe on a much larger scale helping galaxies stick together when conflicting or oppositional… .
Hmmm just food for thought…
Hi, Contagious–
1) “Ever think love is the journey not the destination?”
I’ve heard this before but I’m not sure what it means.
2) “Have you ever considered just pure hate as a comfortable way of existing day to day?”
I don’t know how this applies. I don’t currently hate anyone, but I’ve hated before and when I let go of the guilt I really enjoyed it.
3) “Or is Hell really the absence of light. Why is God the Light?”
I’m familiar with an ancient strand of Christian thought which taught that at death every soul is present with God because no one can escape God. Those who want to be with God experience bliss, those who don’t experience Hell from the same light. It has to do with the condition of the soul, like the way I can bake in the sun with no problem but a person with fair skin might burn.
Greetings Mr. Tudor!
Perhaps you’ll be proud of me for having escaped the narcissist first.
Having said that, I do believe he’s trying to provoke me. No contact for 5 months or so, but I am being subjected to spurts of indirect hoovers and periods of silence. Social media posts that felt specific enough to be targeted, but vague enough to be deniable (before I blocked him). Text messages from random numbers just saying “Hi” or “Hello”. Then silence, then repeated friend requests from fake accounts, then silence. He has never once reached out directly (too proud, I assume?). And I have never once risen to the bait and broken NC.
My questions, for which I’d be grateful for your insights!
1) What is he aiming to accomplish with these indirect hoovers? Does he believe this will provoke me into reaching out, or is it just for thought fuel?
2) If you don’t respond to indirect hoovers (they seem cyclical) will he just move on or escalate tactics?
3) Can I rest assured that he is too arrogant to ever contact me directly, and I am safe from a direct hoover?
A million thanks!
1. The social media posts may not actually be directed at you but you think that they are. The text messages are direct hoovers. The friends requests from fake accounts may not be the narcissist – if they are, they are direct hoovers. This activity is designed to assert control and draw fuel, however they are testing the water rather than risking the major wounding that would come about if he approached you in person and you rejected him.
2. Your lack of response will cause some wounding and will result in the narcissist moving to a different assertion of control, so the narcissist will appear to leave you alone but it will only be for a short time. You would do better to change your number and lock down your social media.
3. No, not only are you already getting direct hoovers but you risk escalation.
Well, well, well, looks like some of us here got a WordPress spring makeover. Or maybe we are narcissists shedding one skin in favour of a freshly acquired one.
Hello HG
When a MMR B somatic start the triangulation, with very hurtful jokes about been seduced or be invited for sex by the another person, what Is the level of possibility she as already cheated on you?
She were sexually cold/absent in the last period.
Weeks later I discovered she replaced me with him soon.
There were no IPPS
She proclaimed herself extremely moral ( hating cheaters) initially and single-without sexual activity for 4-3-6 years (different versions).
I was IPSS Shelf (every time i “pushed” i received a corrective devaluations), buy i was thinking to be the only.
She is still negating the rel with him, even after having flirted very explicitly with him in front of me.
“When a MMR B somatic start the triangulation, with very hurtful jokes about been seduced or be invited for sex by the another person, what Is the level of possibility she as already cheated on you?” – I would need more information from you to be precise but in general terms it is likely that infidelity has already occurred.
When I learned about ASMR and looked at a few related Youtube channels, I came across a video where the speaker was not only purporting to sense how relaxed or not the viewer was – amazingly enough, all viewers who will ever watch the video will feel the same way at this point. She also repeated the following affirmations:
“I am perfect as I am. I can change my life at any moment. I call in more self-love now. I call in more loving people now. I let go of my old identity now.”
And my favourite: “I am the main character of my life.”
Hi H.G.,
In a narc and narc relationship how does the narcissism rationalizes the other person cheating on them ?
It regards it as a threat to control by virtue of their infidelity.
Hello Sir, can you explain from the narcissistic perspective why trump is crashing economy, his obsessions with tariffs , etc etc …. Would love to understand from your reasoning as always what he is doing. Thank you !
He does not see it as crashing the economy. Through this activity he is asserting control over many appliances and drawing huge amounts of fuel owing to the commentary about it all.
Hey HG:
Something about humanity and narcissism nags at me. And maybe it’s deeper than that… I am watching a movie on the Holocaust. The depravity of mankind does not exist solely there but I think it magnified it. But I was wondering…. What if the Jews put Germans in the gas chamber. Innocent ones. Children. How is this different than any other war of collateral consequences. Whether it’s WWiI ,Russia and Ukraine , Gaza and Israel…. It’s hard to tell which side is lead by narcissist or not. And this goes on… but it’s not the generals. I think political killing leads to a sort of clan warfare. You killed my son so I will kill you. Oops I struck a baby. I mean most of the leadership it’s about power and money and maybe some religious ideology. But to me… the masses sometimes join in as a loved one died or perhaps a religious ideology or a quest for freedom. Even American joes slaughtered for freedom in 1776. But when you think about killing, there’s no empathy. The act itself. Yet I have a soldier as a son and he has empathy. He worried a lot about human shields especially children while in Iraq. 1. Is it just warfare lowers empathy in good men and women?
2. And this clan warfare are many just with low empathy as they seek justice and vengeance?
3. Is there such a thing as a pure empath, someone like Christ who would not kill in any circumstance. I am certain they exist. There are plenty of people who die each day for their beliefs 4. Are people who would die for their beliefs empaths?
5. Could they be narcissists like the cults too?
6. Why would a narcissist die for his beliefs? No more fuel….
Thanks!
Hi, Jody–
I’m really appreciating our president. I think he’s the shot in the arm we needed. He plays a bit of a clown, but he’s no idiot and he’s genuinely dangerous–which is good. He does and says so many things just for the commentary. Then he gets more fuel by our responses when he comments on the commentary. It’s really fascinating at this level.
At the same time he and his lieutenants are enacting substantive changes, and I think they’re taking us in a good direction. DC is an absolute swamp, and it needs somebody like Trump. He and his team drive all the right people crazy. I like that the man just gets shit done, without all the decorum. Sure, I enjoy some of the niceties of “presidential” behavior, but sometimes our presidents are too much with that and they just make bullshit decisions. Fortunately, I agree overall with his policies. Otherwise I think I’d be really bothered, like I was under O’BidenBama. The last four years have been tyrannical. I think I’d be crazy if the drunkard had prevailed. I’m hoping that Congress will codify his executive orders into law soon. We’ll see.
Allison,
Do you think Biden’s advisors made any good decisions during his time as president? (Sorry, I have enough to believe he was in cognitive decline for some time, so its difficult for me to credit anything of the last four years to him.)
What action of Trump’s in the last four and a half months do you view as the most beneficial?
Dani
Hi, Dani–
The reason I can’t think of any of Biden’s advisors who demonstrated especially good decisions may be down to the type of narcissist he is. Ultimately he’s fake and like many politicians he has been living off the government for years, so the goal isn’t really to get anything fixed. So, he likes being in the job, being Scranton Joe, and he doesn’t choose advisors on the basis of how good they are in terms of effectiveness. He chooses them according to their ability to make him look like a good Democrat and because that’s far left now that’s the pool of advisors he chose from. And they’re not particularly good at doing things because being judged on merit is considered racist. But there must have been someone decent because we’re still here. Or our continued existence as a nation could be down to other factors. I suppose there was someone who advised him to keep Trump’s tariffs from that time. Perhaps it was the autopen.
Of Trump’s moves since he took office there are actually two that I think are most beneficial : securing the borders and letting Elon Musk do his thing. If you don’t have borders you’re not a nation at all, and the Democrats (and I know this from having been one myself in the past) want to allow as many illegal people in as possible to convert them as voters and use them as funding units for the flow of government dollars. They did it to Ronald Reagan in his administration by promising to improve the border if he gave amnesty to the illegals of California; he did and they turned that state blue and reneged on their promise. They tried that with Trump when he was number 45. And I think working with Musk has shown us line by line the waste and fraud that go on, and what the connections really are. I think the transparency brings a welcome dose of skepticism grounded in the facts of how the scheme worked and that helps us as voters.
All in all, Trump’s brand of narcissism allows him to delegate effectively because choosing certain minions benefits him, and he knows how to pick people due to his business experience and his previous holding of the office. At that time he wasn’t familiar with government and he let a lot of the neocons weigh in. Now, his worker bees have an overall different mindset than that part of the right and the new leftists, and this reinforces Trump in doing what he wants.
Thank you, Allison. I really enjoyed reading your response.
Hello HG:
My ex narc never cheated on me sexually when she n our relationship. He did by his emotional incest with his mother. In fact his sexual relations were always limited . I think he avoided responsibility in relationships but it always irked me, narcissists always cheat. Mine bore his fidelity as a superior badge. When we were legally separated, I did have an affair, I don’t call that cheating although I have had the guilt placed on some religious followers, others pointed out that in Jesus time, if a man abandoned the family that was the only grounds for divorce.
But my question is: do all narcs cheat and I mean sexually?
All narcissists cheat in some form.
Hello HG:
We are set to consult soon. But the toughest part of dealing with a narcissist is is not leaving them physically, or legally or setting boundaries but their sad messed up life where they are alone, constantly in touch pining and broken with sad lives….and it’s like a child or an invalid in my case as he is definitely mentally I’ll beyond narcissism ….but I don’t know what it is, and I feel this constant maternal tug to make sure he is ok even if I absolutely don’t want him in my future. Yes it’s emotional thinking but to me it’s almost biological like my children. I have seen mothers struggle with this. You just want them ok, happy. And I think… he was your husband and you let him rot, refused to help when he was sectioned, shut the doors . I did it to protect myself and son but if it had been cancer or amputation, I would have been there. I am not shallow, my love runs deep. And I don’t know the extent of his mental illness but he has fallen down a rabbit hole. It could be something beyond narcissism. He is sad, broken and alone and lets me know. He also called me a psychopath for not taking him in during his breakdown. He became homeless and sectioned. How could I? He was dangerous but I know his horrific childhood stories, I have met his horrific mother….and your test found her a narcissist but again there is more. I saw her dissociate into a 5 year old. I guess my point is I feel such guilt. I married a half man, a half broken child and it’s so hard to keep ignoring the child’s demise. I fear he will commit suicide. Not because he says it but because of his obvious falling apart. Yes cold logic says the broken child is an albatross no matter the distance and boundaries you make but ….is there some way I could help without hurting myself? Talk soon:(
HG can you please edit the post by Contagious I’m replying to as she’s accidentally written her email into the name bar.
Done. Thank you for pointing that out.
Thank you!
So kind. Thank you
Hi H.G.,
Yesterday 4/5/25 several cities across the US held protests against Trump. How does he react to this. Is this just challenge fuel or does it wound him?
Thanks for your amazing work !
It is challenge fuel, vast amounts of challenge fuel.
How does he react? He dismisses by seeing them as individuals who prefer to rely on fake news.
Jodi: …US held protests against Trump. How does he react to this. Is this just challenge fuel or does it wound him?
HG Tudor: It is challenge fuel…He dismisses by seeing them as individuals who prefer to rely on fake news.
1. Generally speaking, how would a greater narcissist react to such a huge amount of challenge fuel that is unavoidable? Like Bill Clinton when he “did not have sex with that woman…”
It would be interesting to have a short series of videos with you detailing the reactions of different schools of narcissist to huge amounts of challenge fuel from major news organizations. Bill Clinton may have privately dismissed what the news was saying…but he could not escape the cameras and having to give statements.
2. How would the Ultra react to the news media issuing challenge fuel in copious amounts?
Thank you so much for your time! Much appreciated.
1.Clinton dismisses it based on the knowledge of his superiority (I am President, I am wealthy, you can write about it but it won’t make any difference as I am Bill Clinton and I am invincible (so it proved)).
2. The Ultra would not put himself in the position of having the new media comment about him in such a manner to begin with.
Fascinating. Trump thinks everyone is misinformed and Clinton thinks he’s better than everyone else. Boris Johnson treated the journalist like an emotional support funny man. And This One’s Wife believes it’s racists and haters (poor her.)
Thank you, sir. Much appreciation.
Hello, HG–
I really enjoyed Trump: Simply the Best. I found it incredibly illuminating and I’m glad you included the clips of his consistent language regarding his claims of superiority. Very humorous.
1) Regarding challenge fuel and wounding again–would you consider the assassination attempts to be challenge fuel? In the Butler, PA incident he was physically wounded, but was his narcissism wounded as well? Or did the shooting just get his ire up?
2) Would the continued calls on platforms like TikTok from the American people for his death be challenge fuel, or do they wound him? Do you think he experiences threats to his existence from Americans as baffling?
Thank you for your time and your excellent work. I laughed a lot with that video. Fortunately, no signs of prolapse.
1. Being shot at is challenge fuel.
2. The calls for his death are challenge fuel.
Hi HG:
1. Have you seen the series You?
2. The protagonist played by Bagley has all the characteristics of what you teach and what’s interesting is his “ victims” range from obvious empaths to normals to cementing ( rich corporate wife), but he is a serial killer. Are narcs solely narcs ever serial killers or must you have the psychopathic accumulation to be so?
3. I would imagine pure psychopaths could be serial killers yes?
Thank you! Best to you always!
Hello Contagious,
1. No, I have not watched the series.
2. A narcissist could be a serial killer but it would be unusual.
3. They could, yes.
To follow up in watching You,
It’s interesting in his romantic partners.
The cementing pair, both devoid of empathy. She wanted him to use him. He did dirty deeds she did not want to do.
2. The empaths varied. One was a love devotee. The last was a truth seeker. One was short lived but a normal and one was a psychopath that he killed.
But it made me wonder which category I fell with my ex narc who is crazy only half functional from childhood trauma. And what is this “ addiction” as it differed among types. I related most to the truth seeker. My ex was like the protagonist narc very romantic, highly intelligent, highly creative despite a lower class background. Never dull. Great in bed. Someone you could talk to about classical music to politics. Well informed. So when you meet the crazy, it’s like fantastical beasts. What is this? This normal amazing man you got involved with but who acts in such strange and abusive antisocial ways and has paranoia? It’s like Sesame Street one is not like the other. And I must admit it fascinates me. Same with the blog. Maybe be even why some like true crime. Narcs aren’t just your normal assholes. They are different. Like exotic animals almost. They aren’t a majority. They aren’t the norm. You get to a point like you are an exhibitor in a zoo but they are human. But it’s like they are cracked. Even if the President of he USA, they do not act normally …. And their vulnerability shines through… you can tell they have a trauma. They did. They do. This is almost childlike and I think it triggers the mother instinct in you. Love that hurt child. It radiates their vulnerability, half man, half broken child. But where we get it wrong is like the series in You. He wants to be loved despite his abuse, in his case a serial killer. He wants validation for his true nature and no one other than a fellow psychopath or narcissist who just want to use him EVER accepts him unless using him. Even the codependent is using him in the series to validate herself, to be needed. Control is a word bantered around. But what lit me up was who was controlling who? Not the psychopath or fellow narc who was equally using his nature to achieve an end. Not the codependent who was equally relying on him to be needed. And what I observed is that some of the empaths had a fascination with a new species, they just got a thrill in their lives participating in it, watching it, figuring it out. What about the rest? They were killed in the series. Beck was probably the most empathetic and he killed her. This could be symbolic. The one I identify the most with was probably contagion and she ran. Hid. Sucked up the flora in Paris to heal , came back to confront him but in the end fled again. Curious and angry but decides to go to a nature haven. There is a super in it too. His student. She stands up against all odds and costs when cornered but he has the power and money against him. She brought a gun and was ready to kill him. But all the reasons women fall for narcs are laid bare in this series. The second to last episode the woman I feel is contagion sums it up to his truth seeker current empath named Brontë. The intensity, the romance, the loyalty ( often faked) , the romance novel love, the feeling Uta you and me against the world. That last part got me. But I was lucky in that I had that part in healthy relations. That is what partnership is about after all. I can see all the traps now. But for me, I see the desire to understand this exotic creature the most because I didn’t come from a background of abuse. So it made no sense: half man, half broken child. I was a truth seeker.
Second for me was the material impulse to love the broken child. Narcs radiate this. I don’t care how up the food chain they are if you are an empath especially you feel the pain within them. They live with pain. Every human suffers but they have a deeper pain then bills, children to tend, etc… and it radiates at least to me and it triggers the need in an empath as a normal mother for not be bothered to help. Nothing wrong in that instinct and NOTHING WRONG with you so long as their brokenness does not take you down with you. This takes self love. A strong identity and a desire to figure out that exotic creature not to take you off a cliff with your binoculars on. It’s actually heart wrenching for those to know love, joy, happiness to know others can’t.
You can lessen their pain by doing nothing. But although I find it a bitter pill to swallow you can never heal. Now if someone with PTSD, or some other mental disorder. HG won’t like this butDBT has been helpful with BPD. But a narc has no cure. Draw tight boundaries you never cross if you must or if you know you go. Even the truth seekers, the exotic bird watchers will tire. Why? You can note their origin, their behavioral patterns but you will never understand their motives as you are unlike them. End of.
Help HG:
I am in a dilemma. I divorced my ex. I haven’t spoken to him in a year. I haven’t been in his physical presence in two years but I am coming to the UK this May. All of a sudden I get a barrage of Youtube videos from him written about me and he sings me songs from others like Paul Wellers Wildwood or Sunflower. The gist of it is he is miserable and misses me. I messaged him after receiving them and said I could go offer a friendship. He replied with a muppets video?. I am good friends with my exes. I would like that because sadly he had a psychotic break from reality and got sectioned last year. He is in a council flat now and busking now in Taunton. But I told him that I won’t see him unless he makes me feel safe and it would be a little lunch in public ……..and I don’t think I will. I fear him. Half is lovely, half is mad and could be harmful. I used to think it was the drink but he gave it up for me. Non-issue. 9 years sober. Nope it’s mental illness. So here is my question and it perplexes me. You said he’s a narc but…
1. He never cheated. His IPSS was his mum who isolated him at a young age, is abusive, “ self educated him” ….no …. Isolated him and per him after court ordered counseling “coercively controlled him from birth”. I can tell you it’s enmeshment. She acted like his wife from day one. So my question is: can an IPSS be a mother? No cheating. I am positive.
2. He had a huge fight with his mum in 2024 and got sectioned as he had a paranoid psychic break. He ended up homeless. Sectioned and the government stepped in. I would not assist. He was angry, delusional and dangerous to me. Does this happen to narcs or is this something else?
Paranoid psychotic breaks from reality?
3. Ok so I feel guilty as I know he suffers mental illness and he ADMITS to it. His mum hasn’t left the house in over 30 years, drinks, never has friends… she told me, I saw her dissociate in front a of my eyes when I met her and she’s nuts. I vowed never to return and I did not.
3. My ex has never let a day go by without contact BUT it’s always songs he sends, cryptic messages. Photos etc… no mature adult conversation. Never goes away. Never. His silence is not silence. I ignored it but he created accounts for me. I delete. New ones pop up.
So he is a narc per you and I trust you, who never cheats, never stops contact ever in some form and got sectioned for psychotic breaks from reality. He doesn’t fit your typical narc. Why? Is it a co-morbid mental illness maybe?
4. Should I see him? Is there risk?
One of the songs he sent to me directly that he sang was Big Mouth by the Smiths. It made me uncomfortable although I think he meant to tell me he didn’t mean the things he said which is why Somerset Police called me in August 2024 to offer me support and protection 6000 miles away.
My friends want me to not see him as they think he’s not normal or worse.
But I guess my limited or positive addiction says I could help him, see if he is ok. Have a positive ending and a friendship. But mostly I hope he is ok. He is one stop from my cruise on the train. Could he really cause harm? We had 10 years of marriage and many months of happiness. He just seemed to get more paranoid ( joined Britains First) and angry and crazy as time went on. I know when sectioned he had to see a psychiatrist. I know he is not taking meds as he was put into a mental al hospital at 16 and after 18 he got off them and went to college at Bornesmourh on an arts degree. He is against meds. Pot only.
I have trouble letting go of anyone I love and I pity him BUT
I am meeting another man in London. This isn’t about reuniting.
5. Should I consult you? Do you think he could harm me? Many around me fear it??? I don’t. But I am leaning to dropping off his stuff and not seeing him. But I feel this guilt. I married a sick man with a traumatic childhood. Awful horrific. I have witnessed his mum. My essence says help, offer love and friendship no more, see if he is ok. But I have fear too… and your education that nothing helps. Why can’t I stop this feeling that maybe I could help as a friend? And worse, could I really be so stupid as to put myself in harms way?
Unless you know different, I think he is a different narc… maybe a co- morbidity?
6. Do narcs have breakdowns from reality? Get sectioned?
Any advice from others is well appreciated 😊
Thanks
The level of detail contained in your comment and the detail required by way of a response means that this personal matter is best addressed through consultation.
Mr. Tudor–
If all challenge fuel lines to Trump (a highly provocative narcissist as you’ve described him) ceased flowing tomorrow and those who had been issuing it went to saying nothing about him, how would he respond? (It seems like that would be a substantial loss of fuel from the public at the very least.)
Thank you so much for your time! Much appreciated.
He would look to stir up some drama.
Thank you so much, sir. I super enjoyed the series about Media Challenge Fuel that featured Trump, Hilary, and Bill.
I am pleased you enjoyed it.
Hey HG:
Can a schizophrenic have one part narcissist? I don’t know much about schizophrenia but I witnessed my ex mother in law dissociate into a 5 year old. I am certain it was dissociation as she transformed before my eyes. And she’s a hermit who hadn’t left the house in 40 years but her son has similar traits. Many different but he didn’t drink but when he did, he became another person. Different accent, look etc… and I have seen him glazed over non functioning, and I have seen a complete psychotic break from reality where he was sectioned. It would make sense, if I was dealing with multiple personalities. One this kind, animal loving, devoted, funny intelligent man I married who had a good job and then this mess of a person…a jealous angry paranoid controlling insane person who is paranoid to the extent of delusion and can’t function whether it’s feeding himself or shelter. Infidelity is a non issue. Is this narcissism or does he have one part of a personality that is? I worry but the UK government is feeding and housing him but he sends me videos and I fear he is unraveling. I see his brokenness and sadness and I know he is deteriorating. What government resources are there? Not much. Talk soon.
Hi, Jodi–
I think in a similar way to the lawsuits and felony cases the protests are a mistake if the goal is to weaken him.
Hi Allison,
Hope you are well. Xx America’s future is so uncertain and I worry for the outcome. These are unpredictable times we are living in and I hold my fear back from overwhelming me. It’s a battle I fight daily with myself.
I hope these get resolved before things get destroyed. Xx
Hey Allison : you are right. Over 4000 lawsuits, 4 bankruptcies, 34 felonies…. He keeps going and going. Even the tech heads who thought they would hitch on heir wagon to him for fear of Antitrust legislation etc…paid him millions ( Elon Musk 270 million) are losing money over the tariffs who are hurting their Asian chains for components etc… it seems it doesn’t matter who or what you are. Trump does Trump. Can’t say anything Trump has done has eased the cost of living but since I have been born no politician has directly effected me.
HG:
I am scheduling consult. Need an oil check:) with the best man in town!
Hello, Dear H.G. TUDOR! Thank you very much for all the answers! I have another question, sometimes I think that I am not an empath at all, but a “little psychopath” 😊 Since I often have to deal with narcissists due to life and work circumstances (I work as a psychiatrist). In this regard, I intuitively developed for myself a way to cope, or rather “not get involved” in a relationship with a narcissist. I have my own list of “narcissists for a rainy day”. It’s like a drug that you can take a drag on once a year. In general, each of my previous narcissists consults me about the current one and can support me if devaluation with the current one is very painful for me (sometimes I can’t stand it). Moreover, all my narcissists are doctors (maybe this matters), they all know that I know who they are (the ultra one agrees, the average one denies). It doesn’t matter if he has a wife or a girlfriend, but if I ask for help… They have to answer me. And we can only communicate once a year. The ultra gets mad, with the average in answers – no problem. When I wrote to you here, it was a very difficult situation. So thank you very much for all the answers! This time there was a day when, against the background of devaluation, I had “suicidal thoughts” and I used my “contact for a rainy day”. And since he is a doctor and a psychiatrist, he (God, how he was torn apart when I wrote) answered me, consulted on our dynamics (as much as he could) and got into my head. I switched, and the current pain from devaluation passed, these terrible thoughts passed. In fact, my narcissists teach me that there is no need to demonize the situation and this wild horror and anxiety go away. In my experience, you cannot suffer for two narcissists at the same time. And in order to push one out of your head, you need to let the other in. Moreover, the one you turn to causes “euphoria” and this has a pain-relieving effect. Yes, it helps temporarily. And it took me years to have my own “list” of trusted 😊 narcissists. But I am surprised by one of my narcissists, who truly selflessly helps me once a year or six months (does he somehow get fuel from this?) At the same time, I will remind you that I have never had a love (in the traditional sense of the word) relationship with narcissists, we were together at school, work (and these were always only medical workers). Question: Am I really an empath?)) Or are there other such crazy empaths who use this extreme way of coping with the situation? P.S. In fact, when you have several narcissists for a rainy day, life becomes calmer. I can be lucky and not turn to them for two years. But it’s as if I’ve made up this idealized story for myself that “I have a narcissist for a rainy day” and it’s much easier to endure this life.
Hi, Contagious. My “beloved” narcissists, never in my life laid a finger on me. There was never any physical aggression in my life. They are all good, doctors :))
Great! So odd, there is this man who is attractive but a gym bunny. We were talking and all of a sudden he says he will give me 5k a week if I become his and be loyal … ummm…. I said I make my own money. I am not for sale. I walked away but imagine how many only fans or women this guy gets? And who would do that? I guess he is at least straight forward… plenty of older rich men doing it. Plenty. But was so weird. A turn off.
He sounds very transactional. Interesting that he wants to buy–I’m always curious about what goes into the economics of such arrangements. Is he paying for companionship or for silence? The loyalty clause is interesting also. What is loyalty in this context, I wonder?
Hello HG
I discovered the existence of a new (i suppose) candidate ipps directly from this person.
He stalks me in the workplace.
He talks about her while he knows I could listened…
The most horrific kind of “Flying monkey”/lieutenant.
She does not admitted this new rel.
Friends maybe doesn’t know or they just want protect me.
I can’t understand.
Is he a sadist/narcissist who acted for his own pleasure or was he probably used as proxy by her?
(As you explain in Shelf Life)
I was a shelf ipss. I suffered a sustained devaluation and a brutal stop of the rel.
I tried to fix the rel for weeks. She treated me very bad, made a malign hoover and smeared me.
I exposed her with a little group of people, and ignored her for days.
She became clearly furious…
The days after the lieutenant operation, she treated me very politely, friendly again.
Is this kind of dinamic common?
I don’t know how to act.
I can’t escape immediately.
I need more information from you to answer your questions accurately and would invite you to organise a consultation with me.
Hello, H.G. TUDOR! My difficult period has begun. That is why I am bombarding you with questions, in the hope that you will answer at least one of them. Please. 1) What if a situation occurs when from the very beginning my narcissist and I read each other who is who. He knows that I know everything. I understand perfectly well who is in front of me. Why does he deliberately seduce me? Version: in order to neutralize? Do I pose a threat of his exposure? Well, I mean, if he knows for sure that nothing will work out. If you remember, everything I have read from you – control? Only this? Or rather this and again this (control)? 2) Why have my narcissists (not a single one) not had sex with me? If, that I am outwardly attractive 🙂
1. To control you and draw fuel from you.
2. He has no need to use sex to get control over you and draw fuel from you. It is the pursuit of the Prime Aims which governs what the narcissist requires from you, not your level of physical attractiveness.
Thank you very much for your answer H.G. TUDOR!
Hello, H.G. TUDOR! I can’t figure out and understand one thing. I had this with all my narcissists. Both average and high level. This makes me think. 1) Why can he (they) calmly touch others: hug and everything else, but not me? Because I somehow overload them with my emotions? (For me, physical contact really does cause a lot of emotions inside me). Once I even felt how my narcissist’s body literally trembled when he hugged me. Why does this happen? 2) Why can’t he be near me for a long time? Again, I feel like I overload them with emotions. Or is this some kind of game? But if it is being played by an ultra, it is understandable. Why does an average narcissist react this way?
1. You need to consider carefully whether it is the case that you are the exception or is it that you perceive that you are the exception. It is often the case that victims of the narcissist are honestly mistaken with regard to comparisons with other people owing to personal bias and/or emotional thinking and it is important to consider that at the start. This is not to suggest you are lying, but often it is a perception which when a rigorous approach to the evidence is applied, the problem becomes lessened.
2. If it is the case that you are na exception, it will be because hugging others likely aids the facade and the lack of doing so with you is to devalue you.
3. Him not being near you for a long time is likely to be part of devaluing behaviour.
I would need more information from you about your dynamic to be wholly accurate but my observations above are the initial thoughts I have.
Thank you very, very much for your answer!!!! When I read it, the narcissistic part of me was indignant – “I am special, aren’t I?” But common sense kicked in. And I cannot question your answers H. G. TUDOR. If you say that there can be no exceptions, then that is how it is. If this is devaluation… haha I am thinking here too “does it mean that I am so exceptional that it is ME who is being devalued?” But then, common sense says “you are just an easy target, very attentive and that is why even such trifles hurt you. You are not exceptional. Okay.” Everything you write is very sobering. Thank you for being there and doing it for all of us. Regarding the dynamics. I know that there is an audio file about a narcissist at work. But (shame on me) I do not know English and I do not know how I can translate the audio file either. I am a psychiatrist. I work in the clinic that he heads (he is not a psychiatrist). My first interaction with a representative of your kind was at medical university, he was my classmate. And it was 6 years of struggle. After two months I knew who he was. At that time, there was no your site and, accordingly, I did not have a deep understanding. I was extremely observant, I felt something was wrong, then I heard the word “psychopath”, checked the information with what I saw in his behavior, told him (and he did not deny). Well, and then … a dizzying story. We did not have a relationship in the traditional understanding of this word, dates, kisses, sex. But I was the main source (I know this for sure). He was everywhere, all over the place, I am he, he is me, hell, heaven and so on. The peculiarity of this story for me is that I knew, he did not deny and what was open (I saw everything he did with others, somewhere I tried to save, okay, it is not the point, there in the classics). There was a lot. What did not happen. Why am I writing all this? I try to keep it as short as possible, but my background is important to understand what I base my conclusions on. My studies are over. I moved to another city. He got married. We haven’t talked for 5 years. I work as a psychiatrist. Clinics change, bosses change. Almost all psychiatrist bosses are men – narcissists. (I’m great, yes. I knew where to go). And now I’ll tell you how I feel about the difference between Ultra and Average. I think my classmate was Ultra, he understood perfectly well who he was and what he was (although there were periods when he denied it, God, how he drove me crazy, how we fought, how much fuel, right?). He didn’t consider himself a good person. His manipulations were conscious, he was a genius, in everything. Later I met a lot of average people both among colleagues and among patients. Those who consider themselves truly “good people”. In my opinion, they are in many ways. With them – to my horror, I have a lot of coincidences… sometimes it seems to me that if I had not met my classmate, I would not have demonized narcissists at all. But for me, the main difference is not in this. It is on the level of feelings (I am writing this as a psychiatrist and I think that uninformed people will read this and think that the doctor needs treatment.) It seemed to me that I had learned a valuable lesson, that I was now resistant to all manipulations, I could always break off contact in time, leave – when it came to the average narcissist. I was sure that I was immune. And so, my experience of that excruciatingly terrible wonderful relationship with my classmate seemed to acquire some meaning. Lesson learned. But as it turned out, it was very presumptuous to think so. I forgot about Ultra. And the point is not even or not so much that Ultra is more difficult to detect. The POWER of influence is important here. I have never used drugs. But there are “weak” and there are “strong”. Ultra is a strong drug. I will explain what is happening now by sensations. This never happens with the average (or rather, it does not happen so much, you can resist it). The last days, when the “game has begun” I am constantly in a state of affect: all thoughts are only about him, I feel wild excitement, anxiety, my hands are shaking, sensitivity increases, sleep is disturbed, appetite disappears (this is what happens when communicating with the average). And this is what happens only with Ultra: I feel wild euphoria. I see how people are attracted to me, how they look at me, how they want to interact with me more, I look at myself in the mirror and think that I am great. I feel strong, I feel my narcissistic part again (oh, this blissful forgotten feeling), I feel terrible and wonderful at the same time. As if I am him. We are one. All my superpowers are returning to me again. Being a narcissist is amazing 😊 BUT! 1) It seemed to me that communication with a classmate had destroyed me so much that there was nothing left. What can I be loved for? What can I be appreciated for? The empathic part died. I am not special, I could not do anything… I… I am gone. Therefore, even in such a state (euphoria), I do not have illusions about my “exceptionality”. My classmate was in my heart, I loved him. (It hurts to admit, but I loved him). The rest – only in my head. And here’s what’s surprising (no drug caught vit you to go through all this – without sincere love. It was she, now I understand, who kept me close). On the other hand, it has just begun, I slowly feel as if I am being reborn from the ashes. (Oh, it turns out that all these years I led a boring ordinary life and have already forgotten what it is like to be a superman). Eve bit off that damn apple again. 2) I know that I cannot stand to go through this again. This agony of separation. I do not want a relationship with a narcissist. I want a family, children, normal human relationships. Which my narcissists cannot (do not want) to give me. And in general, in fact, the only possible interaction is between us, where I am FORCED to interact with them (study, work). Never – romantic, love. Although.. we have already slept with each other 1000000000000 in our heads. 3) When I came to work, there were no warning signs. This is already a multidisciplinary clinic, he is not a psychiatrist, colleagues said only good things about him. The first interaction – I felt “something”. But I drove away my intuition with the words “you have professional deformation, this is paranoia”. The first months were wonderful – a great team, excellent conditions. The 4th month of work began. It all started with an incomprehensible, sharp, demonstrative ignoring. And then a quick rapprochement began – conversations. It turned out that he had problems in the family (on the verge of divorce from his wife), went to a psychologist, takes antidepressants. And here begins the story where I realized that I OVERESTIMATED myself and that thanks to interaction with the average narcissist, I completely lost my grip. I am under hypnosis. We are sitting in the doctor’s office, I don’t know how, as if I took truth serum, we are discussing psychopaths, I am telling him about cases from practice, about this phenomenon, I am very interested in it. I even sent him a link to this site to the article “narcissist and alcohol”. Where were my brains? After all, I considered myself super experienced, invincible, reading people by eye, stable. But I was under hypnosis. Then there were a couple of scenes when he attacked me. I must say that everyone in the clinic respects and loves him very much, he communicates with everyone and a lot. But, I was attacked. The worst was when he said that I owed him money for the fact that he spent a session with his psychologist to find out if he was a psychopath. Then there was a long conversation where I said that he was attacking me. He tried to rationalize it. He said that he loves and values me as an employee. That these were just jokes. That no, I don’t irritate him and that he wants to communicate with me. But at the same time he said, “Well, of course I can not joke, but how will we communicate then?” After that he STOPPED. But the state began – under the drug, what I described above. I am euphoric, I feel that he is everywhere. So far it is only at the level of my head. There are attempts at triangulation, but so far I am steadfastly enduring them (because so little time has passed and the impact is small, but it has begun). So far he does not write to me for personal contact (although there were isolated actions, he sent a poem, a song – but this is not only for me). So far he does not invite me anywhere. What am I afraid of? I understand that something will happen. The question is, what should I expect and what should be my further actions? For now I try to behave “like everyone else”. Politely, cheerfully, cheerfully. I do not criticize, I laugh at all the jokes and so on)) Are you saying that the only option for me will be to quit my job? It’s a shame, because it’s a really good job, a cool team, a great salary… I’m a sought-after psychiatrist, the clinic is interested in me. Are there any options so that I don’t have to leave and at the same time don’t have to suffer? H. G. TUDOR please help. I read and understand that the text does not convey the horror and beauty of what is happening. The presentation is crumpled. And through a translator. Forgive me.
Josephina, you have provided a lot of information with regard to your circumstances and to do it the justice it deserves by way of providing you with a full and detailed response, the most appropriate forum is through the audio consultation. I would encourage you to book one and I look forward to helping you further.
Okay, got it, thank you very much H.G. TUDOR
Hi Josephine: very interesting experiences. I have one question… did you report his attack? Was it serious? Did you get medical treatment? If not, why didn’t you report it? ( you still can) As you know in cases of physical abuse it’s important to keep a record.Even it only happens once (rarely) there are uses and making a record helps for any future legal options you might need:) best wishes!
Thank you for your attention!
Hello, H.G. TUDOR! When communicating with a narcissist, there is a moment when the mask falls from his face and you see his “true expression” or “true look” (which you wrote so much about). This is not a metaphor now, it is literal. This happens only for a couple of seconds. Does this happen unconsciously? Or does the narcissist do it on purpose? If he does it consciously, then for what purpose?
It is something which happens subconsciously in unaware narcissists. I recommend you watch my video, “The Imitation Game” to understand more.
Thank you very much for your reply!!!!!!!
You are welcome.
If the narcissist is in a new relationship, what would cause him to keep hoovering an old ex? Is it to triangulate with new gf or is it because new gf is missing traits and he is looking elsewhere for possible replacement?
1. If the narcissist is hoovering through the seduction of the new person, then this is because the ex is on the narcissists radar and his narcissism perceives that control (plus fuel) can be obtained by hoovering and this will not damage the seduction of the new person. Indeed, it may be the case that the narcissist is allowing the new person to know about this hoovering (I do not have enough detail from you) so that he is (a) asserting control over the ex directly through hoovering and (b) asserting control over the new person by triangulating them with the ex.
2. If the narcissist is hoovering the ex when the new person is in devaluation, then this is being done again for control but is because the new person has “failed” in the mind of the narcissist and it might be that the narcissist is seeking a return to the ex which will then result in the new person being disengaged.
I would need to know more about the dynamic and timeline of where the narcissist and the victim are any to provide a more detailed answer.
Hello HG
What could happen if you are on the shelf painted black, and you ask to the N the favour to buy you an object.
MMR B
I would need more information to provide a wholly accurate response but based on what you have written, the most likely outcome is that you come on the narcissist´s radar but since you are painted black you are likely to be ignored and your request is not responded to.
Ok, thank you.
If she accept, i suppose this means you are no more black. The favour can be considered a form of comfort crumb.
Right?
I understand.
Thank you.
In this days she gave me comfort crumbs+humiliation with triangulation
Today I said to her (we work together) “I had deleted your telephone number, because I don’t want fall in the idiotic temptation of texting you — If you will want, you can write to me.” She seems very confused, surprised
I act by ET, probably because of my narc traits.
Right?
If this person is a narcissist you should not be inviting the narcissist to write to you.
Right.
But I ask to my self if this wounded her. She seems disappointed.
She restarted a strong push and pull tactic in person.
Kind-indifferent-kind-indifferent-hateful-kind-indifferent and so on.
WTF
Fortunately 2 months and i will escape from the workplace.
I will implement my no contact regime.
No wonder, she is confused and surprised to hear something like that. Are you sure she is a narcissist? She seems just not into you, and you can’t accept it and move on.
Hi SED.
I’m sorry you are dealing with narcissists and people who are not caring and kind towards you. It’s good, though, that you are here and seeking HG’s advice.
I agree your emotional thinking is driving your choices. Not because of your narc traits, though. Because of your empathic ones.
At the moment, you probably feel like you need to find ways to interact with her, to reconnect and reestablish lost closeness. But logically, if someone shelves us, we shouldn’t try to reconnect with them. ‘Normal’ people don’t shelve, because they don’t use or participate in that unhealthy pull/push dynamic.
What you need is a way to lower your emotional thinking. You say in two months you will be able to escape the workplace but two months is quite a while. It’d be worth it to start working on lowering your emotional thinking now. My suggestion is you utilise HG’s expertise on lowering emotional thinking. This will probably involve some level of no contact that can be established immediately.
Hopefully it will help and you’ll start to feel better very soon.
Thank you for your kind comment.
Mr. Tudor,
I need a bit of a refresher. Does elevated ET cause an erosion of empathy? If so, can you explain why or point me to a bulletin that explains why?
Thank you in advance.
No, elevated emotional thinking leads to emotional decision thinking rather than logical thinking. External stressors cause an erosion of emotional empathy.
Thank you for the clarification, Mr. Tudor.
Mr. Tudor,
I think I understand my confusion with regard to elevated emotional thinking and eroded empathy. If I may, I have a follow up question.
When an empath is ensnared, they have elevated emotional thinking which causes them to make excuses for the narcissist’s manipulations and abusive behavior.
Are the narcissist’s manipulations and abusive behaviors external stressors that can cause eroded emotional empathy?
Thank you for your time.
When an empath is ensnared, they have elevated emotional thinking which causes them to make excuses for the narcissist’s manipulations and abusive behaviour – that is correct and also it may be the case that the individual does not know what they are dealing with either.
Are the narcissist’s manipulations and abusive behaviors external stressors that can cause eroded emotional empathy? Yes, absolutely they are.
Mr. Tudor,
Thank you for allowing me the time to work this out. I’m very grateful for the education you provide.
HG, if I may, I have a follow up question please.
I have a difficulty at the moment of keeping apart if it’s the other person or me who is projecting a negative trigger onto the other person?
If the other person is simply stressed out from work and their own problems or if it’s me who is projecting and thus feel the unease in their presence. My own feelings, problems and thus projections or if it’s not me but them who is causing it?
I find it all falling together in one basket and creating a mix which I can’t keep apart.
What would be the go to step to separate the confusion, I guess is my question?
To speak to me.
HG, I have a question regarding male narcissist and his treatment of IPPS. I got thinking about it watching your video on Kanye West. Is it true that a male narcissist treats his IPPS (wife) as his extension and then may view his daughters accordingly i.e. judge their appearance negatively if it does not match his wife’s appearance (as in his mind IPPS’s appearance is like accessory chosen by him which makes him look good)? I never understood why my father (UMR) was constantly trying to “mold” me into looking like my mother, even down to hair length and colour.
Hello
You ignore the narc for days (first sphere of infl)
She use a lieutenant to cause you to text (playing the victim)
False empathy by her in the first respond + playing the victim “why you don’t talk to me?”
You provoke her saying she had never loved you, it was just a game
She respond with a very long, cured text where she reject this and accuse you (guilt tripping).
But admitting she think you (in your “cold” way) had loved her.
Victim respond: Ok. You’re right. Each one loved the other in his way
What type of hoover is this and what type of reaction is probably?
MMR B
Direct hoover using back handed compliment.
Dear Mr Tudor,
Did you by chance see “Hilarious” Baldwin belittling Alec on the red carpet? Absolutely Disgusting !
Have not, will not and will never watch Meghan’s fake facade circus. Another narc who loves to embarrass and insult people in front of others. I’m glad they left it in the series so people can she the what she’s really like.
Thank you for painstakingly viewing the series on our behalf, what a real trooper you are seeing as we know how much you love so called “cooking” shows.
🥳
I had not, but I shall look out for it now.
Dear Mr Tudor,
What’s with female’s hands n nails these days ? Hilarious looks like she’s ready to fly off on her broomstick after casting a spell over her dopey looking manipulated husband.
Corrective disruption and manterrupting !? How about you just humbly apologise for your shameful, degrading behaviour to someone you supposedly love and cherish. Of course, you’re another supercilious person who just can’t be sincere!
Mr Bubbles and I are thoroughly enjoying Pamela’s very authentic cooking show. It was so plagiarised by TOW!
We also watched Adolescence on Netflix, whoa !!!!
Congratulations on your recent successes and continuing to expand your horizons. Just watched your interview with Andrew, well done ! You’re popping up everywhere! Bravo 👏
Bubbles and HG,
The red carpet interview with Alec and Hilary Baldwin provides an excellent snapshot of two narcissists colliding.
I have watched HG’s YouTube video of the interview and HG’s descriptions of the actions of both Baldwins is very helpful.
If anything, the interview makes me *not* want to watch the reality show of their family. It sounds awful.
I’m wondering, Bubbles, if you have seen the full red carpet interview which is about seven minutes long? In this version, they are both as bad as each other. They bicker and each provokes the other with passive-aggressive comments.
I watched the full interview and found that it highlights how narcissistic they both are.
At the end of the interview, after Alec gives a glib and fake token spiel about how ‘mind-blowing’ and ‘special’ his wife is, the interviewer winds up the interaction by saying something like, “..love for you guys. Enjoy….” Before she can even get the words out, Alec says , “Thank you,” and then dismisses the interviewer altogether. He looks away and motions to someone else standing behind them and starts talking to this other person, completely ignoring the interviewer and his wife.
The arrogant and dismissive way Alec ended the interview came right after both Alec and his wife gushingly said that they hope “the public” enjoy their new show and buy Hilary’s new book.
The superlatives spewed out by Alec were instantly forgotten as soon as the interviewer started winding up the interview. It was obvious that the guff he just spewed out about Hilary when he said, “she is, probably, *the* most special person I have ever met in my life” was meant to sell their cheap, banal show and Hilary’s book to the public. How stupid does he think “the public” actually are?
Dearest WiserNow,
You bet your sweet bippy I watched the whole 7 mins and I was delighted to see Mr Tudor do a YT on it and of course I watched it ? So informative and helpful.
A lot of Mr Tudor’s followers were very excited for him to produce this particular piece on the Narcwin duo. All these narcs are cray cray!!
One thing for sure, Mr Tudor will never run out of content. Haha
Thank you WN for your observations and your most insightful reply, as ever 🤣
Hi Bubbles,
Thank you for your effervescent reply, as ever 🤣
I see what you did there!
Yes, HG is going to have more material about narcissists than he will know what to do with. I think his celebrity-leaning YT channel is locked in for the long run.
Hilarias and the perma-angry Alec alone have spawned seven more potential little narcs. Their’s is just one family. With both parents being Hollyweird narcissists, it makes me wonder how many of their kids already have a one-way ticket to narc-city.
God help any empathic children trapped in that household. It would be enough to make an empath or normal cray cray 🤪🙃🤣
Thank you for the laughs, Bubbles, as ever 😉😘