The Narcissistic Truths No. 7




  1. I am taking in as much of this new knowledge as possible; perhaps because of being kept “off balance” I have not sorted my thoughts out enough to identify what level narcissist my “boyfriend” is, nor what type of empath I am yet.
    However, his routine sadistic and emotion-less responses have been identical to examples you have shared, and it is sobering.
    I am attempting to break free from this relationship of almost 6 years and it is intimidating; he went into my purse and hid my keys and wallet from me, then rummaged through to find paperwork for my new lease (he was not previously aware I am trying to move out and away from him). He prevented me from leaving, and is now attempting to keep me with him.
    Of course, he is well educated, has a lucrative career and is very good looking – so who would believe me? He is playing “the nice guy” card now, after all… It is a very delicate struggle for freedom, for air at all.

  2. I am dealing with a narcissist daughter in law- she completely brainwashed our son. My question is would it help my son to share these insights with him? Or will this just make him isolate more- he is a mess and really is not the confident, self assured son we raised. He honestly has a look in his eyes that is so frightening- not him!! I don’t know what to do and I am constantly worried for him. I have not had contact with her for several months and very minimal contact with him. They live approx 3,000 miles away from us. Please give me anything that can help him!!

    1. Hello Renee,

      A difficult situation. He will feel caught between his wife and you as his parents. He will recognise that she does not treat him well, but he will not understand why. He will want to make his marriage work. She will have identified that you are likely to interfere in her control of him and therefore she will have smeared you and also sought to isolate him from your influence. Any pressure you bring to bear, even for the right reasons will be problematic because
      1. She will use this as evidence of control and interference on your part, to support her own agenda; and
      2. It will have repercussions for him in terms of how she treats him. He will then likely resent what you have done and be isolated further from you.

      The most appropriate approach is to allow him to have the moment of enlightenment. Do not tell him that she is a narcissist. He will not want to hear this and will not want to be told what to think. Instead, express your concern about how you don’t hear from him often and also as to his general welfare. Don’t point to a cause of this but rather point out what you see. Since you are not blaming anyone (yet) he is going to be more amenable to this. Once he recognises he is struggling/isolated etc ask him why he thinks this is and see if he mentions the behaviour of his wife at all. Once he does direct him to some of my material so he can read it and make the connection himself. You need to coax him along the road to self-enlightenment remembering he is the one caught in the middle of it all, he is the one who is in the maelstrom and unable to see it and he is the one who will react badly if his wife’s narcissism is rammed down his throat. I recommend trying that approach and reporting back on progress.

  3. Does it hurt when a source says “I wish we never met?” and never speaks to you again, if they were very potent?

  4. It is sometimes the most injurious form of abuse and yet can you confirm that you are not able to form the judgments you splutter at us with rage?

  5. It is a shame that normal communication for us is used by them to extract our fears and weaknesses. Then their language is used to avoid, deflect, manipulate and lie to keep us off balance.

  6. If profuse bleeding from the mouth is accompanied by a cough, it’s possible that internal organs have been severely damaged. You may want to seek emergency treatment…asap.

    1. Haha ABB. I love that meme and your caption is hilarious. Make sure you wash the control freak off. We both posted at 6:31….you a few seconds earlier, so we were somewhat on the same wavelength.

      How are you?

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