The Haughty Forty



The trait of haughty arrogance runs through our kind. This is predicated on our innate superiority to all around us. The world ought to realise how special we truly are and we are naturally contemptuous of those who fail to deliver the required respect and recognition. Our default setting is one whereby we are scathing of those around us, irritated by any success that they may have which moves the spotlight of admiration away from us and on to them. It annoys us to see underlings being afforded attention and angers us when we are not given the appropriate adoration befitting who we are. We are sometimes at a loss to understand how these ordinary people fail to realise that a giant walks amongst them, a colossus, a behemoth, these princes amongst men and we realise that this is a further failing that is attributed to those who are cannot claim the greatness that is ours. If we knew how to feel it, we might pity them, but we do not and as a consequence our feelings are ones of contempt, annoyance and impatience. Naturally, when we are seducing you, our wonderful prospective primary source we need you to see the benevolent individuals that we are, the kindly souls, the magnanimous man, the entertaining and humorous person and those masks are expertly and conveniently worn. Beneath this veneer of pleasantry remains our sneering disdain for all those we interact with. How we scoff at their foolish little lives, their ignorance of what really matters, the mundane rituals they engage in as they drift through life like some epsilon semi-moron. They are so fortunate that our kind brightens their lives and brings some respite from the ennui through the great works we create, great charisma that we exhibit and the great sensations we evoke in all who have the privilege of being selected by us. Occasionally, we cannot keep this haughty arrogance in check. During moments of incompetence by underlings, those of a tertiary and servile nature, we may snap and be dismissive of them. Usually you, as our primary source, will regard this as evidence of our desire for high standards and the mark of a person who does not suffer fools. Any discomfort you may experience in our unpleasant dressing down of a clerk who mixes up our tickets or a bumbling waiter who spills our drink is dissipated as you remain in our thrall, mesmerised by our superiority. At times your thinking may be allied with our haughty disregard for these minions. Those instances are providing you with short-lived glimpses of what really lurks beneath our many masks and in the fullness of time you will find yourself experiencing such arrogant contempt once your own devaluation is in full swing. Nobody is immune from this stance of ours because it runs through our core, we keep it hidden for as long as we are able for most of our kind has the awareness that such an outlook towards people is regarded as regrettable and unpleasant. Entwined within this attitude you will also witness repeated projection by us onto you. It is necessary for us to relieve the burden by passing it on to you, to maintain our elevated status and preserve our control of you and others through this contemptuous air. Here are forty spoken instances of our haughty arrogance which you ought to keep a watchful eye out for.

  1. Don’t be sorry, be accurate.
  2. You are always a let-down aren’t you?
  3. Don’t be bitter, be better.
  4. You go out of your way to annoy me don’t you?
  5. Not like that, like this.
  6. I haven’t got time for this.
  7. You don’t understand, you are not me.
  8. Sorry is your favourite word isn’t it?
  9. I’d do it myself but you need to learn.
  10. I honestly have no idea why I bother with you.
  11. I have the patience of the saint, I really do.
  12. Do you know who I am?
  13. I don’t notice what other people are wearing.
  14. I lead, you follow.
  15. I do, I am not done to.
  16. I have one of those only mine is better.
  17. You’ve made such a little go a very long way.
  18. I would tell you why but you wouldn’t understand.
  19. You’d be nothing were it not for me.
  20. I’m the rock star in this relationship.
  21. People only like you because of me.
  22. You need to smile less; you look like an imbecile.
  23. I suppose it is the best you can do isn’t it?
  24. No, it’s not good enough, you’re not good enough.
  25. Why did I ever choose someone like you?
  26. That’s okay, you can’t help who you are can you?
  27. It must be hell being you.
  28. Who are you again?
  29. Sorry, do I know you?
  30. Once is a mistake, twice is you sitting in a room with no work to do.
  31. I’m not arrogant, I’m just better than you
  32. You have no idea what I have to deal with.
  33. You wouldn’t last five minutes being me.
  34. You don’t get to be me through chance you know?
  35. You’ll wish you hadn’t said that because you’re wrong.
  36. Don’t worry I’ve carried you so far.
  37. You should have been smothered at birth.
  38. You are such a waste of space.
  39. Laughter is for fools.
  40. You really are a sorry excuse for a human being.

38 thoughts on “The Haughty Forty

  1. Lamb says:

    Thank you, HG .

  2. Lamb says:


    My narc has never said a single one of those things to me . He may very well have thought them though.
    He knows full well if he ever said any of those things to me I would have blasted him. I am not a pushover.
    As far a saying “ sorry “ to my narc , I do apologise when I’m wrong, but never EVER in the sense of being a doormat for him, or to pacify him.
    I am a strong woman, I don’t take shit lying down. I think it’s one of the reasons my narc chose to marry me.
    What do you make of that, HG ??

    1. HG Tudor says:

      He chose you as a consequence of the factors described in Sitting Target. The behaviours you describe appertain to part of those traits described in the book.

  3. Stephanie Farlow says:

    I have another 20 more I could add to that list. Thanks for this.

    On Feb 15, 2017 12:11 PM, “Knowing the Narcissist” wrote:

    > HG Tudor posted: ” The trait of haughty arrogance runs through our kind. > This is predicated on our innate superiority to all around us. The world > ought to realise how special we truly are and we are naturally contemptuous > of those who fail to deliver the required respec” >

    1. HG Tudor says:


      1. Mona says:

        “The world ought to realise….” You see, that we don`t. We do not see any reason. Pleasure

        1. HG Tudor says:

          That’s why I wrote “ought to” otherwise I would have written “the world realises”. Pleasure.

  4. ava101 says:

    HG? Where is the difference between arrogant remarks and verbal abuse (in your opinion)?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Arrogant remarks are about us. Verbal abuse is directed to another.

      1. ava101 says:

        But some arrogant statements sound like verbal abuse to me … hm …

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Now you are just playing the victim ava101.

      2. ava101 says:

        That’s what I mean. What do you answer to such remarks when meeting another narc who tries to give you this x%$?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          I out narc them of course.

      3. ava101 says:

        You make another (even more) arrogant remark? You don’t react and give back later?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Possibly one of those. Or I make a cutting remark to the individual concerned. Or I bash their head into the tiles when I follow them into the bathroom.

          1. Clean up in the executive lounge again! *Janitor mopping* “That MoFo Tudor Again! Sonofabitch!

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Hong Kong Phooey is our janitor.

          3. Hold Everything. Did you just date yourself with that reference? I did laugh at that.

      4. ava101 says:

        At work?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Wherever it is required.

  5. ava101 says:

    How about “I can’t talk to you, I have to attend to the important things in my life.”

    1. HG Tudor says:


  6. malignnarc and HG Tudor are the same?

  7. Kathy Graham says:

    “You have no idea who you’re running/rolling/dealing with?”

    Oh but I do…

  8. Maria says:

    Yes again.. heard them all..

  9. Maria says:

    Yes sga6in.. heard them all..

  10. E. B. says:

    “Once a victim, twice a volunteer.”
    (A statement coming from supposedly empathetic people.)

  11. Lou says:

    Do you like your job HG? Do you enjoy doing what you do for a living?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Very much the case Lou.

      1. Lou says:

        That is good HG. A privilege, I believe.

      2. NarcAngel says:

        Nice that you enjoy what you do. Do you make money hand over fist in scrapbooking? Do chicks just pay an arm and a leg to be in yours? Bahaha….I kill me.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          No payment occurs for admittance to the scrapbook.

      3. twilight says:

        I forgot about the scrapbook, lololol

  12. E. B. says:

    “I don’t want problems, I want solutions!”
    (A narcissist asking me for a solution to *his* problems.)

  13. heathertx70 says:

    Sitting here thinking WTF? Shaking my head…this cant be for real. Why cant i wrap my mind around all of this?? He cant be this…this doesnt really exist. Speechless…i need therapy.

  14. Karen says:

    My ex used a couple of these phrases. He lived in my home, that I own, and he only minimally contributed. He is retired from a branch of the US armed forces, chose not to work, or even volunteer. I work full-time, and bring in an excellent salary. He was jealous of my accomplishments, and that I am very loved. He was an award-winning actor – until I saw through him. He can’t even “do” being a narcissist right – he doesn’t “discard” anyone – we’ve all “discarded” him. His “haughty” phrases lost their sting….

  15. Mona says:

    HG, I know people, who are very successful, have great talents, big families and a huge heart. And they have an awareness, they know about your kind. They do not care about your kind. If it is necessary, they give your kind a blow. Whom, do you think, I admire?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      The Incredible Hulk?

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