N: “If you loved me you would be happy (with my definition of the relationship’s essence) and unhappy (with the my definition of the relationship’s essence)”
Gabbanzobean that’s exactly how I felt, controlled and programmed. If I fought it he would make me suffer. He wanted me to have sex with another woman which I wouldn’t do. I did try before he threatened to leave me while I was pregnant. I ended up watching him have sex with another woman while i cried on the other bed. He got upset that I wouldn’t let him have a good time. He told the other person to go have a shower while he finished in me. The whole time I was crying. There I was pregnant and alone with a man who cared nothing more than to gratify his needs. I wish I had your strenght then. Its crazy how they can control people, and believe they are the vjctims
Omg …thats so awful!! I read stories of abuse and feel ashamed for complaining about my own situation which is nothing like this 🙁 you deserve so much more! He took away one of the most special times in a womans life, carrying her child and dirtied it. Im so sorry what he did to you. Thats so disgusting! I hope your not with him now. You deserve way better!
i am hoping you heal through your writing/sharing here and follow the Creed of Tudor!! Leave the past where it belongs, look ahead and stay here where you will learn to “seize the power”
Mykeytolife…
That is horrible!!!! I was long distance and a dirty little secret so I was not subjected to the types of things you describe. What you have described is devastating to hear. Have you escaped him? I hope so!
The one I was caught up with was nothing but charming and nice. I wonder if he subjected his wife to these sorts of behaviors. But I guess I will never know.
When he gave me the old “if you love me you’ll leave me alone” line that is exactly what I did. I stopped talking to him and it hurt like hell. I promised him I would leave him be until he wanted to talk to me. This was before I knew what he was. I basically agreed to let him reach out to me whenever he wanted. And while I have not heard from him yet and I feel confident that I probably never will I still wonder WTF I am going to do when and if he hoovers.
MKTL,
That is sooo terrible but I can relate a little bit.
I was with my ex and she was setting me up for a threesome. Myself and the other woman didn’t want anything to do with it but we would have eventually because we were both under her spell and brainwashed.
Thank goodness I got out but I still feel bad for the other woman because she never will and will have to deal with that kind of behavior forever.
I’m so sorry you had to live through that moment.
Their control is very powerful.
Sending you hugs.
@mykeytolife
Yours is the most abominable post I have ever read. It’s execrable on all levels. I wish you had gone “Lorena Bobbitt” on his despicable ass, threw ‘IT’ into the sharp teeth of the garbage disposal, pierce his eyes and let him bleed to death. And I’m being nice! How you have not poisoned this piece of shit, is beyond me! You seem like such a sweetheart (I read your other posts), you are not even bitter!! So glad you escaped.
Read…read…and ‘pamper’ yourself to a consultation with HG.
Breathe… you are now under “Doctor” Tudor’s expertise.
This phrase got me to do a few things I regretted but, surprisingly, a few things I didn’t.
This is how matrinarc vacuumed up my life.
On hearing that sentence I should have abandoned her forever.
What of the narcissists’ use of advice-giving to put down and destroy your confidence?
N: “If you loved me you would be happy (with my definition of the relationship’s essence) and unhappy (with the my definition of the relationship’s essence)”
“If you love me like you say you do, you’d give me some space and leave me alone”
And that’s exactly what I did.
Before I learned what he is.
Fucker had me right where he wanted me.
Gabbanzobean that’s exactly how I felt, controlled and programmed. If I fought it he would make me suffer. He wanted me to have sex with another woman which I wouldn’t do. I did try before he threatened to leave me while I was pregnant. I ended up watching him have sex with another woman while i cried on the other bed. He got upset that I wouldn’t let him have a good time. He told the other person to go have a shower while he finished in me. The whole time I was crying. There I was pregnant and alone with a man who cared nothing more than to gratify his needs. I wish I had your strenght then. Its crazy how they can control people, and believe they are the vjctims
Omg …thats so awful!! I read stories of abuse and feel ashamed for complaining about my own situation which is nothing like this 🙁 you deserve so much more! He took away one of the most special times in a womans life, carrying her child and dirtied it. Im so sorry what he did to you. Thats so disgusting! I hope your not with him now. You deserve way better!
i am hoping you heal through your writing/sharing here and follow the Creed of Tudor!! Leave the past where it belongs, look ahead and stay here where you will learn to “seize the power”
Mykeytolife…
That is horrible!!!! I was long distance and a dirty little secret so I was not subjected to the types of things you describe. What you have described is devastating to hear. Have you escaped him? I hope so!
The one I was caught up with was nothing but charming and nice. I wonder if he subjected his wife to these sorts of behaviors. But I guess I will never know.
When he gave me the old “if you love me you’ll leave me alone” line that is exactly what I did. I stopped talking to him and it hurt like hell. I promised him I would leave him be until he wanted to talk to me. This was before I knew what he was. I basically agreed to let him reach out to me whenever he wanted. And while I have not heard from him yet and I feel confident that I probably never will I still wonder WTF I am going to do when and if he hoovers.
mykeytolife,
That’s psychotic! You were living with the Devil!
OMG
mykeytolife
😢
that its horrendous..
i am shocked ..
i hope you are totally free from that monster.
MKTL,
That is sooo terrible but I can relate a little bit.
I was with my ex and she was setting me up for a threesome. Myself and the other woman didn’t want anything to do with it but we would have eventually because we were both under her spell and brainwashed.
Thank goodness I got out but I still feel bad for the other woman because she never will and will have to deal with that kind of behavior forever.
I’m so sorry you had to live through that moment.
Their control is very powerful.
Sending you hugs.
@mykeytolife
Yours is the most abominable post I have ever read. It’s execrable on all levels. I wish you had gone “Lorena Bobbitt” on his despicable ass, threw ‘IT’ into the sharp teeth of the garbage disposal, pierce his eyes and let him bleed to death. And I’m being nice! How you have not poisoned this piece of shit, is beyond me! You seem like such a sweetheart (I read your other posts), you are not even bitter!! So glad you escaped.
Read…read…and ‘pamper’ yourself to a consultation with HG.
Breathe… you are now under “Doctor” Tudor’s expertise.