Hounded By Love

HOUNDED BY LOVE

One of my ex girlfriends, Kate, was a big animal lover. She was always sponsoring some rare monkey in Africa or baking cakes to raise funds to save the gay whale or such like. People often remarked how fortunate I was to have someone so caring. I would tell them if she spent less time playing Dr Doolittle then maybe I would not have to sleep in the spare room so often to remind her of who she should be focused on. I remember this used to get me some puzzled looks and for an instant I could not understand why but then I worked out they thought I was being mean so I used to tell them the bed was always full of her dogs so there was no room for me. They would smile and nod. Too easy. You see, people will, most of the time, take the path of least resistance and this means that they will accept most explanations so long as there is some degree of plausibility about them. People need to find a reason and especially those of an empathic nature have to do so. Provide a reason to explain something away and people accept it. This is one of the main reasons why we are able to do as we do, because people either accept the explanations that we give for what is otherwise aberrant behaviour or they find a reason or explanation themselves (either blaming some third party event or influence or blaming themselves) rather than seeing the behaviour for what it is. I do not write this from a position of blaming people for thinking and behaving that way, it is understandable. They do not know what they are dealing with, they do not realise the person they are engaging with is a narcissist and they, as truth seekers, need to find a reason to explain the behaviour. They need to know and this invariably causes them to fall for what we tell them or what they tell themselves.

Anyway, she got involved in volunteering at an animal shelter which did not impress me and to add insult to injury she expected me to walk and feed her dog whilst she was out being St Francis of Assissi. I kid you not. So on the two evenings when she was helping out I would invite her sister Amanda over. She would feed the dog and I would pretend I had taken it for a walk. (So long as I let it out in the garden and did its business (which I would fling over into next door – I guess that’s why we have new neighbours) Kate thought the hound had been walked. Thus I was able to lure in Amanda. She was low hanging fruit. Ignored by her boyfriend it only took a couple of weeks of texts and declarations of compatibility and I was bedding her each time she came round. Kate would come home and spend most of her time petting her dog but I had someone else to distract me so I let that flagrant failure to give me attention slide a little. Not totally as I still used it to remind her of how neglectful she was of me. I did notice though that she was spending more time and more money on the hound and was obviously doing it to provoke me. Her sister Amanda then started to change. She was initially great fun, vibrant, passionate and interesting but then she got whiny and needy and had the audacity to start criticise my girlfriend Kate. That was not on. She would still call round twice a week, even when I stopped inviting her and I had grown tired of bedding her. I had decided that Kate was the better choice of the two and wanted to focus my attentions on her but she doted on that wretched dog.

Demonstrating the decisive decision making that is my hallmark I took prompt action. On an evening when Amanda had called over I agreed to sleep with her. Before doing so I let pooch out into the garden and opened the gate. I went through the motions with Amanda and then had just returned downstairs when Kate returned. A few moments passed and then she began to call for the dog and with increasing urgency. The hound had gone. I blamed Amanda. Cue sibling fall out. The upshot of it was Kate never spoke to her sister again. Amanda never called round and pestered me and the dog was gone.

Two birds and all that.

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45 Comments

  1. Oh, and I meant to say- lol I keep doing this on here-Mommypino don’t be so hard on yourself! Of course you have flaws and weaknesses. If you consider this perspective-narcs have done more damage in their lifetime than you or I can ever dream of. Your weaknesses and flaws are just a drop in the bucket. We freelance in our dysfunction and generally it seems to revolve around disordered persons like them, and yet they are at it full-time all the time. Let that imbecile take some of the rap. 🙂

      1. Lol thanks NarcAngel. I just think it’s a shame that regular folks will beat themselves up daily, ruminating over past mistakes as if we weren’t human beings who invariably make many errors and yet narcs are waking up every morning, exuberant about their next targets as if no other day existed, before.

  2. Hi HG,

    Welcome back! I’ve always been meaning to ask you about whether there is a relationship between certain narcissists and dog ownership. I’ve noticed that 4 narcissists I’ve been entangled with have made a big deal of being dog owners and/or being close with dogs. Two are confirmed narcissists via consultation with you (1 MMRN & 1 LMRN) and the other 2 I self-diagnosed as a MMRN and ULN since thanks to you I escaped before becoming ensnared.

    This often confused me because I would think narcissists would view dogs similar to you as something that is taking away attention from them and that the dogs also require someone to take care of them. After reading Fuel, I am starting to think dogs are like any other appliance that can be shown off/used to attract attention. Would it be accurate to say that some mid-range narcissists are drawn to dog ownership because it’s an easy way to expand their fuel matrix/access to fuel, boosts their facade by making them looking kind and decent, and increase the odds of luring in empathic people for ensnarement? Plus they could also use the dogs for triangulation purposes?

  3. My father was, I believe, a narcissist. He was extremely controlling, abusive, and isolating. My mother, he, and five siblings lived in a neighborhood where we had absolutely nothing in common with anyone. My mother wasn’t even allowed to choose the house that we lived in, and she always would say that she hated our home, and the neighborhood in which we lived. Our neighborhood was filled with working-class people, mainly trailer trash who seemed to look upon all of us with contempt, as we seemed and probably were quite superior acting and snobbish at times. He then fostered an “us against them” mentality with many of the neighbors. My father and mother were what I term “crazy Catholic”, or “fundamentalist Catholic” and they felt they were surrounded by detractors of God’s infinite will. I wasn’t interested in all the “god” stuff, especially since my father beat us mercilessly, even when we were praying, for mumbling, or not standing up straight, etc. During this time, perhaps to escape the reality of the situation and to have one living being that would listen to me and be a loyal friend, I became utterly immersed in dogs. I knew all of the dog breeds, I begged my parent to get me one, and I would often show guests of my parents the various breeds in our many encyclopedias, as we had many books in the house. I prayed endlessly at my parents’ suggestion that I could become like Saint Francis, for he could communicate with the animals and they with him.

    My father was very achievement-oriented, but simultaneously sabotaged my siblings and my success by forcing us to go to area schools for the religious aspects. My mother and father seemed alarmed at my love of animals, dogs especially and frequently told me that they were not as important as people. People, from my experience, however seemed quite awful. My peers bullied me mercilessly, my father, mother and siblings took their anger out on me with verbal and physical violence. We had no friends on the block then. All we had surrounding us were cranky old people who hated how loud my family was, and would make cutting remarks to my mother about having too many children, and us to quiet down.

    My aunt and grandma took pity on me and obtained a dog from a shelter for my birthday. I was elated. He was a Scottish terrier poodle mix I named ‘Scottie’. My brother refused to call him by his name, and instead called him ‘Smelly Dog’. I however LOVED ‘Smelly Dog’ aka ‘Scottie’. My father seemed overly preoccupied with his “loyalty”. He was deemed a “disloyal dog”by him and siblings, as he was constantly running off. My mother actually scraped her knee once trying to grab him as he bounded out the door, his black curls flying down the street. It’s as if Scottie knew that the home he was living in was god-awful. Often, pets will mirror the behavior of their owners, and I had a good deal of anxiety and stomach issues as a result. Both he and I suffered through severe anxiety caused by our volatile home environment and he and I would vomit often. The first time he ran, the vet when they found him the first time from his old tags, advised that we neuter him, and this elopement behavior would dissipate. My father refused to do so, but continued to become angrier and angrier at Scottie for being so apparently difficult and disloyal to his home and family. My father called him ‘Disloyal Dog’ from here on out.

    My mother became very ill and died two months later around the holidays. To this day I cannot stand Christmas. I came home from school a month or so later and Scottie was gone, again. My father related to me that the ‘Disloyal Dog’ had ran, and he couldn’t find him. A few weeks later, my father became rageful at something that I or my siblings had done, and he blurted out that Scottie had been found, but he was sick of him running and he left him in the woods near our home to live out the rest of his days. I was horrified and baffled at the callousness of my father as he knew how much I loved the dog. He did something similar a few years later to my grandmother and her dog. She had dementia and was treating it like a baby, but it was harmless. This is how he treated everyone he “loved” in one way or another.

    Now I understand why and what a monster he was. Now I understand why I gravitated towards other narcissists.

    He has since passed away quite recently, and I feel a sense of relief that both my parents are gone. To this day, I cannot bring myself to get another dog. I still mourn the loss of my best friend, and I am strictly a cat person now.

  4. My father was, I believe, a narcissist. He was extremely controlling, abusive, and isolating. My mother, he, and five siblings lived in a neighborhood where we had absolutely nothing in common with anyone. My mother wasn’t even allowed to choose the house that we lived in, and she always would say that she hated our home, and the neighborhood in which we lived. Our neighborhood was filled with working-class people, mainly trailer trash who seemed to look upon all of us with contempt, as we seemed and probably were quite superior acting and snobbish at times. He fostered an “us against them” mentality with many of the neighbors. My father and mother were what I term “crazy Catholic”, or “fundamentalist Catholic” and they felt they were surrounded by detractors of God’s infinite will. I wasn’t interested in all the “god” stuff, especially since my father beat us mercilessly, even when we were praying, for mumbling, or not standing up straight, etc. During this time, perhaps to escape the reality of the situation and to have one living being that would listen to me and be a loyal friend, I became utterly immersed in dogs. I knew all of the dog breeds, I begged my parent to get me one, and I would often show guests of my parents the various breeds in our many encyclopedias, as we had many books in the house. I prayed endlessly at my parents’ suggestion that I could become like Saint Francis, for he could communicate with the animals and they with him. In this way, would never be lonely again.

    My father was very achievement-oriented, but simultaneously sabotaged my siblings and my success by forcing us to go to area schools for the religious aspects and to isolate us as many of our peers and even teachers who admonished us for asking too many questions in class couldn’t stand us. My mother and father seemed alarmed at my love of animals, dogs especially and frequently told me that they were not as important as people. People, from my experience, however seemed quite awful even though I desperately wished to fit in with them. My peers bullied me mercilessly, and my father, mother and siblings took their anger out on me with verbal and physical violence. We had no friends on the block then. All we had surrounding us were cranky old people who hated how loud my family was, and would make cutting remarks to my mother about having too many children, and us to “quiet down, for god’s sake”.

    My aunt and grandma took pity on me and obtained a dog from a shelter for my birthday. I was elated. He was a Scottish terrier poodle mix I named ‘Scottie’. My brother refused to call him by his name, and instead called him ‘Smelly Dog’. I however LOVED ‘Smelly Dog’ aka ‘Scottie’. My father seemed overly preoccupied with his “loyalty”. He was deemed a “disloyal dog” by him and siblings, as he was constantly running off. My mother actually scraped her knee once trying to grab him as he bounded out the door, his black curls flying down the street. It’s as if Scottie knew that the home he was living in was god-awful. Often, pets will mirror the behavior of their owners, and I had a good deal of anxiety and stomach issues as a result. Both he and I suffered through severe anxiety caused by our volatile home environment and he and I would vomit often, almost allergic to our surroundings. The first time he ran, the vet when they found him the first time from his old tags, advised that we neuter him, and this elopement behavior would dissipate. My father refused to do so, but continued to become angrier and angrier at Scottie for being so apparently difficult and disloyal to his home and family. My father called him ‘Disloyal Dog’ from here on out.

    My mother became very ill and died two months later around the holidays. To this day I cannot stand Christmas even though I try to put on a merry demeanor during the holidays as it’s not the world’s fault that holidays are ruined for me. I actually prefer ordinary days even as an adult…During these ordinary days, however I came home from school a month or so later and Scottie was gone, again. My father related to me that the ‘Disloyal Dog’ had ran, and he couldn’t find him. A few weeks later, my father became rageful at something that I or my siblings had done, and he blurted out that Scottie had been found, but he was sick of him running and he left him in the woods near our home to live out the rest of his days. I was horrified and baffled at the callousness of my father as he knew how much I loved the dog. He did something similar a few years later to my grandmother and her dog. She had dementia and was treating it like a baby, but it was harmless. This is how he treated everyone he “loved” in one way or another.

    Now I understand why and what a monster he was. Now I understand why I gravitated towards other narcissists and endured their abuse both personally and professionally. I do have one sad gift from all this. I can tell if someone is off in this way within minutes of speaking to them, however I formerly did not listen to my instincts. Now I have slowly learned to listen to my gut.

    He has since passed away quite recently, and I feel a sense of relief that both my parents are gone. To this day, I cannot bring myself to get another dog. I still mourn the loss of my best friend, and I am strictly a cat person now.

    1. Hi survivorx ..your story is so sad. Im so very sorry about your dog. This isnt the first time ive heard of a narc parent doing something horrible to a pet. Its so traumatic! My dad would abuse our dog. He shot it around the yard with a b b gun and i can still hear the yelps in my head. To this day i get very anxious hearing a dog yelp its so painful emotionally and then i feel rage. I wont mention what else hes done but i have a contempt for people that abuse animals in particular. It really upsets me.
      I grew up with dogs then for many years only had cats and i prefer dogs lol i love animals but dogs are my favorite. You should think about getting a dog itd probably be very healing in a lot of ways. You werent responsible for what happened to scottie just as i wasnt for the abuse on my dog. Thats solely on your dad and him alone.

      1. Thank you for your kind words, Chihuahuamum. My hubs and I have 2 male cats that act like dogs and one that is the size of a dog and who barks at birds . (He makes the weirdest sounds, it’s glorious.), lol, so it’s all good. They are also easier to care for and we love to travel and a dog would be so much responsibility. I used to walk dogs quite often along with my other job just for the therapeutic aspects, alone. I tried to volunteer at a shelter nearby, but it’s a very popular spot to walk and exercise dogs. Perhaps one day we will get a dog. I do love that cats don’t follow ‘orders’ of humans and do what they like—I enjoy living vicariously through their mischief and blatant disregard for authority. Plus:

        Bonus #1: My father hated cats. When he found out on his deathbed that we had cats, he said he wanted to kill them both.

        Bonus #2: It keeps my siblings away from my home as many are allergic.

        1. It sounds like youve come a long way survivor!! I had a tabby that made bird sounds to mirror the birds lol it was funny to watch!
          Yes the travel aspect is tricky. My chi is my baby where i go she goes. She travels with me regardless where it may be. I get her on flights and she wins the attendants over so im able to hold her in my sling 🤣
          Im glad to hear youre doing well 🤗

          1. I definitely have. I am very fortunate in many ways. I think perhaps that was what narcs envy in me–one of the things, anyway–my ability to bounce back. The pain is excruciating in the moment, however. My father used to say as a back-handed compliment that I needed a strong man to keep up w/ me. I didn’t understand at the time, but now I think that I do. Oh wow! I think that is a Tabby thing. Our Tabby Purrrd is the one that barks. It kills me. I thought about getting a little dog. Purrrd LOVES playing with dogs. He was playing w/ our neighbor dog yesterday.

      2. Sorry I’m a bit new to this platform, but I forgot to mention that I’m truly sorry for what your father did to your dog. That’s horrific!

        Isn’t it funny how we do the apologizing for the narcissists and abusers in our lives and they NEVER apologize for anything?

        1. Ty survivor…i know i do that as well apologizing or rationalizing abuse bc of abuse even.
          Ive had to tuck the things hes done deep away or id have nothing to do with my dad.

          1. I stopped interacting with my dad when I was about 18. Idk if I’m an empath, or what, but I was almost allergic to his presence. I couldn’t wait to move out of our childhood home. I ran away from home and begged my sister to assist in emancipation, as she was a lawyer. I don’t know how any of my siblings kept in touch with him. He would send me awful letters, and poems guilting me about not talking to him, reminding me about how I owed he and my mother for caring for me when I was ill as a small child even though it was their fault that I was sick as they refused to take me to the doctor. He convinced my brother to publish them. They are the worst pieces of rubbish I’ve ever read on Amazon. I’m no stranger to ‘Dysfunction Junction’, lol, but thankfully I’ve retained my sense of humor. It looks like you have, also! We women are strong! <3

        2. Hi survivor…thats so funny about your cat! I was thinking yesterday i wonder how her cat would take to a dog well i guess quite well!! Lol too cute!
          My narc grandmother used to curse me for my stubborness. Shed say i was the most stubborn person shed met and shes right. Its not a blessing tho bc its kept me in bad situations or prevented me from other options or pathways in life.
          Allergic yes being allergic to toxins whether environmental or people our bodies are geared to reject these and it comes out in different ways. With my narc mum and brother i feel physically sick and anxious around them. I only see my mother at certain family events like birthdays etc and its gotten to the point i take cbd oil to relax myself. They are toxic and your bodys telling you so. Im glad you went no contact and no need to ever feel guilty that guilt is for your father alone!

          1. Thank you. He has passed away so it’s a lot easier, but it was hard for a time as my family would call me constantly to see him in the hospital. I had to block them eventually. It wasn’t something I wanted to do, I felt very badly that he was suffering in his illness, but I also felt myself going crazy over time–there was like a black void surrounding him and I felt so nauseous and disturbed and I did go to visit out of guilt, but “not enough” for them. So nuts. I was tired of my world revolving around abusers and their needs, also. He didn’t care anyway. When he saw me he told my husband and I that he figured it would be the last time and was ready to die. He didn’t seem phased at all like they were saying. He said he wished he could kill my cats. This is what he did my whole life. Very common for narcissists to cry and say they regret things, but it’s never to the people they need to apologize to actually. It’s merely to keep the attention and victimhood on them.

  5. This is hilarious and I know many narcissists who are great dog owners—the dogs give loads of fuel and attract attention. I have a feeling you don’t really dislike them—you are just not fueled by them and don’t want to clean up after them. If you had a little Bichon puppy you would be king of the mountain at the local park.

    1. No Claire, the dog would get more attention then he would, that is unheard of silly empath! 🙃

      1. Christ you think of everything. But the fuel from the sex with drooling puppy lovers.. It’s potentially unparalleled..

          1. They just lay on the floor during sex. They don’t usually jump on the bed.

          2. Oh yes but how did you know they were lying on the floor unless you were looking at them? How dare you look upon a dog when your eyes and attention should only be on him! Shame on you! They don’t usually jump on the bed?! He would be appalled! 🤣🤣🤣🙃

          3. In my recollection it is always the cats that jump on the bed! It’s been so long my memory is fuzzy! Haha

          4. Well the cerebrals usually just lay on the floor during sex, but the………
            oh…sorry…you meant the dogs. Never mind.

  6. “…and had the audacity to criticize my girlfriend Kate.” Haha. You’re unreal Tudor!

    1. I think this is what ‘broke the spell’ for me. I can’t stand excessive hypocrisy (We’re all hypocrites to an extent, but, the narc takes it to another level.) and arrogance. Those two things are a serious turn-off.

  7. Miserable, petty, immature… Narcissist.

    I hope they ended up making amends in the distant future from this incident.

    You mention how people will believe anything with slight plausibility… see, that’s the thing about me.. I don’t. I must have drove my narc CRAZY with challenge fuel because I NEVER accepted his lies. Would challenge them with everything I had. The only time I felt a sense of relieve was when he finally told me what he was.. because.. finally, I had the truth and I didn’t need any further explanations. Next time I won’t wait that long. I am very rarely wrong about people. Empaths have an intuition reading people better then most just like the narc, but we unfortunately second guess ourselves for reasons you know and have described all too well.

    1. I don’t think I will be friends with a sister or a friend again if she slept with my boyfriend/husband. That just says a lot about their character when they do that to a sister or a friend.

      1. This is just my unpopular opinion… but I would forgive my sister for making a human mistake with a man who was cunning and manipulative and did not treat me with any real respect. Had HG not been a narc chances are she would t have cheated. Chances are your sister ( I’m speaking hypothetically as I don’t know these ppl) but chances are high your sister had been with you through thick and thin on a REAL level.

        No man is worth messing that up. People loose sight of what’s actually important over petty jealousy. And that’s how narcs contiune to win these battles.

        1. “Chances are your sister ( I’m speaking hypothetically as I don’t know these ppl) but chances are high your sister had been with you through thick and thin on a REAL level.”

          But that makes the betrayal even worse. She’s the one who messed it up. It’s not my obligation to welcome back people that betrayed me just because we shared ‘real’ level history together. It’s just my personal preference. I’m not saying everyone should be unforgiving like me. I just know that in my heart of hearts I will never be able to put that aside.

          1. MommyP
            Devil’s advocate:

            Would you consider your character to be any less and would you have wanted your husband to forgive if you had given in to the handyman?

          2. Hi NA, I will answer your question at the end. I want to first clarify what I said a little bit. And I want to say that this is how I personally feel and I am not saying that my feelings are what everybody should have. I think that it is a different situation to cheat on your partner than to betray a friend or sister by having sex with the person that they love. I know the saying that we should never say never, and nobody has to believe me either, but I really believe that I will never do that to a friend. And if I did that to a friend then I am not really that person’s friend, there is a crack in that friendship and it shouldn’t even be called friendship. I have very few friends in life although I have plenty of acquaintances. The few friends that I have, two from fifth grade, two from 3rd yr HS, one from college and two here in the US are all put in a pedestal in my mind. The thought of me having an affair with their husbands repulses me so it doesn’t even cross my mind except here for an intellectual discussion. I am always a cheerleader for each of them and whether I am happy for them for having found the person that makes them happy, or reprimand them for being unreasonable or immature to that person, or support them and protect them if that person turns out to be mean to them, I am always in their corner. I don’t expect my friends to put me in a pedestal the same way that I do to them, but I expect some loyalty and respect or deference towards me as their friend and that should be enough to prevent them from sleeping with my partner even if he was a manipulative evil and seductive narc. They should be in my corner that if the narc put the moves on them they should stay away and at least give me some hints that he’s not a good guy because that is what I would do.

            And to answer your question, I have a tendency to self flagellate so I will definitely be very hard on myself if I had given in to the handyman. I would be writing here all the time about how horrible I am and you would probably tell me to not be so hard on myself. I also believe that my husband will forgive me way before I would ever forgive myself.

          3. Fair enough it’s a complex issue. But the real problem here was HG. He came between them… and on purpose (in this particular example I don’t know the history of the nature of thier relationship) If they’d had focused more on their relationship (as sisters) I suspect that would have been much more worth thier time.

            But I respect your opinion. And I even understand it.

      2. I’m not saying what the sister did was right, but keep in mind that narcs will often make the best of us do things that we would never do normally. Never say never. Anything is possible if they mess with your head enough.

        1. We win battles against a narcs when we make decisions based on what’s best for us and not what will piss them off or prove them wrong or please them. We win the battle when we don’t play. For me it’s not in my best interest to surround myself with friends who might sleep with my partner if he messed with their heads enough. I don’t want to put myself in that insecure position.

          1. I understand your p.o.v. I just speak from personal experience when I say that narcs can and will press you to do and say things that you would never do otherwise. It’s not about strength of priniciple or a comment on someone’s ability to be faithful, a good sister, friend, whatever. Anyone’s head is fare game. A lot of ppl that know me consider me to be a pretty strong and ethical person, and even I did do things that I’m embarrassed about to this day with my narc that I’d never done, before or since.
            This isn’t to say that outside the narc situation people aren’t responsible for their actions and behavior, but things can and do get dicey with the disordered person. They are experts at manipulation and brain washing. I used to feel that things were more black and white until I became entangled with mine. Being cautious with whom you associate with is helpful, but it will not protect you from their behavior. Personally I couldn’t see myself going so far as to sleep with my sister’s or friend’s significant other, but I don’t rule it out as a possiblity, anymore. Anything is possible when you’re involved with these toxic individuals.

        2. Thank you Survivor X for understanding my POV. I understand what you are saying and I agree with you. I am not morally or ethically superior than any of the victims here. I think that I am also full of weaknesses that a manipulative person with no empathy can exploit easily which is why I’m trying to learn here. I discovered that when I was so close to cheating on my husband who is an intelligent, handsome and good person with a narc handyman whom I have never met before and only worked at our house for about two weeks. I never thought that it would ever happen but it did. It made me realize that I’m more vulnerable than I am aware of. I could have partially reacted to this with ET as well but just like you, I also do not see myself ever doing it to any of my friends. It’s just no matter how hard I try to imagine it I really can’t see any possibility of me ever doing that to a friend. But also I know that even if my friend was manipulated, I will not be able to forgive her after that. I am not always a forgiving person. Maybe I will be able to understand them, but I still can’t see myself having friendship with them again.

          1. I completely understand–more than you know. I’m not a cheater, but with my narc he had me pleading with him to choose me. It was incredibly bizarre. I was entirely brainwashed after 5-6 years. He had me thinking that one day things would change, but even still I never normally would be the type to be with one person while at the same time awaiting another person to get their head out of their ass. 🙂 . Essentially, they get you to behave like them so they can lie to themselves and say we are just as bad as they are and that they can get us to do whatever. Power trip, I suppose. My narc said ultimately that he liked messing with married people. He got off on being a homewrecker. Thankfully we never met up IRL. He’s a self-proclaimed sex addict, gambling and drug addict, not to mention master manipulator. Still, as you say, I can’t see myself hooking up with my sister’s boyfriends/husbands. Stay strong! <3

      3. Hi mommypino…i agree itd be hard to forget. Forgive yes but forget not as easy bc trust has been broken.

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