The Narcissist and Covid-19

H.G Tudor - The Narcissist & Covid-19 e-book cover copy

There is a pandemic. The virus is Covid-19. 

Hg Tudor, using his unrivalled knowledge of narcissists and the narcissist dynamic analysis how the current pandemic is affecting narcissists and what they do.

In this detailed book, he covers four key areas

– What the virus means to the narcissist

– What the virus means to your no contact regime

– What the virus means to your position in the fuel matrix

– How would a lockdown scenario affect each and every sub school of narcissist

This book is filled with insightful, unique and practical information for you during this time of crisis. Whether merely curious or in need of essential knowledge to beat the narcissist during the pandemic, THIS is the publication everybody needs to read.

For just US $ 10, access this book and all of its information here

917 thoughts on “The Narcissist and Covid-19

  1. Renarde says:

    Holy shit! This is a big thread!

    HG. Question.

    Where EXACTLY in your opinion do you think the British Executive Health & Saftety at Work are? Precisely.

  2. Renarde says:

    Some of the more eagle eyed amongst you might see I’ve changed my avatar.

    This is my earliest memory. 18 months. I was on a ‘pitch and put’ golf course. I remember it like yesterday.

    I saw all these RED FLAGS and for some reason, I desperately wanted to pull them out of the holes.

    I was running faster than Dominic Cummings after learning his boss had CV19. Or possibly realising that Jimmy Savile was on my tail.

    L@@K at the sheer determination when I’m trying to pull 17 out of its moorings. Marvel! Also clock me hair. I was born a clink.

    I got up to many shenanigans on that holiday. I have literally not stopped getting up to shenanigans. I attract trouble, always have. I’m sure when I ring my friends they groan and go, ‘Oh God, what has she been up to now?’

    So if this picture isnt a testament to what is now my lifes work, I dont know what is.

    1. WhoCares says:

      Renarde – it is a cute photo. I can see how the troublemaker streak runs true.

      “I was born a clink.”
      Sorry but what does this mean?

      1. Renarde says:


        This is true. It’s like I’ve a got a devil on my shoulder who whispers ‘moments of hilarity’

        Some of my greatest and finest work was achieved at University. First one. Each time, I deliberately knew what I was doing. What was strange is that I’d often have the idea, no one would attempt to stop me and then would join in.

        I did almost get caught out once. Whilst what I was doing could’ve had me kicked out (in fact many things could have), it was an error on my part.

        I didnt lock my halls door. And I’m saying no more.

        Now I’m pleased to say that I reserve the troublemaker for narcs. I still have my moments though.

        But not on that scale. Months before Covid, I was in Tescos. The manager was doing that OCD thing with perfectly aligned labels etc. Every time I tried to reach for something, he blocked me. This went on several times.

        Right. When his back was turned I deliberately shifted quite a few of the boxes on their axis.

        Petty I know but his zero awareness a loyal customer was trying to get in and out irked me.

        Born a clink means born red. So was my younger bro. He stayed, I was dark by 3. He was bullied for that by his school pals.

        Interestingly, I know so many Doms who want a natural red head. Usually little. And curvy.

        1. WhoCares says:

          “Born a clink means born red. So was my younger bro. He stayed, I was dark by 3.”

          Right, thanks. Me too, only I was dark and turned light.

          “Interestingly, I know so many Doms who want a natural red head. Usually little. And curvy.”

          I’m not sure where to file that, but interesting to note.

          1. Lorelei says:

            Whocares—I ended up at a bondage event thing at a night club once and people were really nice. There seemed a genuine camaraderie. It doesn’t bother me but I didn’t feel quite comfortable. I worked with a guy once who made sex equipment and it’s very high priced. Swings and the like..He told me he was a narcissist as was his wife. She had abandoned her son and he said no good woman does that. It was weird. He was aware indeed but on the level of lacking true awareness HG discusses. He was a wimp under it all because I cared for him medically once. To be honest, he was always great to me. I’d still love to see him. I’m rambling on a bit memory of a long ago person.. He also wore kilts to bars. Unusual guy but interesting.

          2. WhoCares says:

            Yes, your past co-worker does sound a bit peculiar…all but the part of wearing kilts to bars.

          3. Renarde says:


            File it under ‘pretentious fucking wankers’ x

          4. WhoCares says:


            Got it..haha. Done, then!

          5. Renarde says:


            Nice one x

          6. WhoCares says:

            Nice pic!

          7. Renarde says:

            Thank you WC X

        2. Violetta says:

          Awww, widdle cuteness….

          There may be some sort of mischief gene associated with red hair. A friend told me about her dorm-mate in college. She was a happy drunk, as opposed to a mean one, but in her case, that meant she was caught whizzing along the hall at 2am wearing roller skates and nothing else, blithely shrieking, “WHEEEEEE!!!”

          Apparently she’d always been that enthusiastic. When her mother gave her the human reproduction talk, then opened it up for questions, the girl promptly asked, “Is it fun?”

          1. HG Tudor says:

            Red heads feel pain differently. They need 19% more anaesthetic compared to non- redheads

          2. WhoCares says:


            “Red heads feel pain differently. They need 19% more anaesthetic compared to non- redheads”

            You have stated this before elsewhere. I don’t quite agree with it.
            I am fairly stoic when it comes to physical pain. (Can provide several examples as a child or as adult.)
            The thing I can personally says supports this is the most recent trip to the dentist I have experienced. The locale anesthetic would not take, and the dentist said that (2-3 tries) was the most local that could be given. He would proceed with a topical on the tooth nerve (reapply and check in with me)…was not fun, I could feel everything and while the pain was muted, I had to let him know when it was getting more intense.
            I do not recall having a similar experience as a child at the dentist (I didn’t know if it was me or this particular dentist was less capable than some) and I was born a natural “clink.”

          3. HG Tudor says:

            Your comment actually agrees with what I have stated.

          4. WhoCares says:

            The one example I provided does agree with your statement.
            But I have not noticed this phenomenon at any other time as an adult or child. Many other trips to the dentist as a child did not require more than the normal amount of anesthetic. And I would guess that I take pain meds way less than most (for headaches or what have you). If you were to state that redheads *tolerate* pain differently than I could agree with you. I am not sure that they *feel* pain differently though.

          5. WhoCares says:

            “Redheads feel pain differently.”

            Sorry, a further question. This observation is based on statistics reported somewhere….or personal experience?

          6. HG Tudor says:

            It was based on a scientific report.

          7. WhoCares says:

            Okay. Thanks HG.

          8. HG Tudor says:

            No problem

          9. WhoCares says:

            So, I looked up some of the findings…(also a past boss of mine, who is a fellow ginger, have also had discussions on the topic – he does have significant pain at the dentist)…

            From one article:
            “In other words, redheads do feel more pain, but they also feel less pain — they just process pain differently.”

            Mmmm. That’s conclusive.

          10. FYC says:

            WC, I am curious, I am not a red head, but with regard to local anesthetic, I am slow in response time for it it take effect and slow to emerge form the effects. I wonder if this has to do with how we metabolize topical pain killers? Obviously this is not true for general anesthetics. I also am told by doctors I have a higher than average pain threshold, but I doubt this as I seem on par to others in similar situations.

            In other words, you may be slow to absorb the local, not that you need 3x the amount overall from the outset?

          11. WhoCares says:

            FYC – slow to absorb…that makes more sense to me. The dentist I had before this last one seemed more empathic and considerate. She was gentle and there was no issues with the local anesthetic.

          12. FYC says:

            WC, After a quick search on scientific study, HG is accurate (of course). Here is the study:

            As for local anesthetics, the agent binds to proteins and can vary by type of anesthetic agent.

          13. WhoCares says:

            Thank-you FYC! I actually really want to read it…seems far more interesting than 2nd grade 3D solids atm. 🙂

          14. FYC says:

            WC, haha that made me laugh. You are welcome and it is interesting. Once again I learn something new here every day…

          15. Narc noob says:

            Hg, I thought you were going to say that unlike red heads you opt out on anaesthetic altogether.

          16. HG Tudor says:

            Shows how little you know of me.

          17. Renarde says:

            Dear Vi

            Now it’s my turn to laugh so loudly I think I’ve startled the neighbours dog.

            That’s hysterical. Totally worthy of ‘Hi Jinks’ status. The writer in me is commending your usage of ‘blithely’.

            Oh God. Sex must be fun or why bother? Girls got her head screwed on. Even if she was a bit wonky at times. But the best of us are!

            Name and number please. Post haste. She needs to be recruited.

          18. Violetta says:

            She was a college friend of a grad school friend, so I don’t even remember her name, just the story.

            Hadn’t heard about dental sensitivity, but I had seen a study where they tested how close they could put a fiber to the eyes. People with light-colored eyes were very sensitive, while people with dark eyes were less so. Chinese eyes could have the fiber directly on them without blinking or feeling discomfort.

    2. Narc noob says:

      I noticed your new picture. Nice to have a story behind it.

      1. Renarde says:

        Narc noon

        Aww TY! Sometimes I cant quite fathom how time unfurls x

    3. Alexissmith2016 says:

      Go girl!

      1. Renarde says:

        Grr Alexis! X

  3. Renarde says:

    Oh my God.

    I’ve just checked some of the randomners on messenger…and I may, I mean may have hit paydirt for the ASF. Western Union, here I come!

    So hes actually composed of what I can only call a shrine? With lit candles, around a box of hard currency.

    Now, has he done this before? Hmm.

    I might engage with this one.

    Lovely Sujul.

    Your Beltane gift awaits. Cash first though. Please.

  4. Renarde says:

    So, heres the thing.

    Got another one. Let’s call him R.

    Hes sent a video to me, unsolicited, of him having a quick one off the wrist.

    In said vid, he comes. All over his stomach.

    Why? Why does he think I’d even find it remotely attractive? . I’ve given some serious thought to this today and I think that his Fet is being observed. I think deep down, he knows hes not going to get a decent woman that way. He does not care.

    He just wants to be witnessed. He wants a reaction. Positive or negative. He just wants fuel.

    So yes performing the act and gaining thoght fuel.

    I think I’ll call the group Renardes Renages.

    I sent a cock pic to another man last night.For shits and giggles. Normal men would yell and scream at this. But unnormral men wont.

    I think the problem with Empaths that we are largely scared. So naturally, we do not provoke.

    I think that what Empaths do not understand is how far we can push narcs.. Believe me with the unare, it’s very far.

    Every E on here needs to imagine themselves as a wall. Let them bounce against it. No. Reaction. GOSO AND NC will take you so far. But that’s The Beginning. HG knows this.

    These are advanced techniques.

    Hope this helps x

    1. Anm says:

      I have thought about this. Have you notice how many trolls there are on the internet right now? Not on here, but the internet in general? Random people are off of work, scared, pissed, triggered. They will say something shocking, offensive, purposely disagree to argue. Anything to still matter. So sad

      1. HG Tudor says:

        Internet trolls are narcissists and misguided normals. The former have no emotional empathy and have a need for fuel. The latter have no emotional empathy (but no need for fuel) towards the faceless strangers they are dealing with online, but they would not behave in a similar way in person because that would occur with the application of emotional empathy.

      2. Renarde says:


        Fine words. You’ve got this.

        Yes. They are, Ns are rapidly running out of control . Vast majority do not understand control.

        By this I mean two things. The unaware do not understand that they need to control others and equally, they do not understand other narcs who want to control them.

        The unaware are the most spectacular miss judges of character. Ms will state up and down ., he or she is good. This can mistep an E.

        Amn, they know fuck all. Because they do not understand Affective Empathy they will blind side you. Cannot count the amount of times the MME said, ‘But all my friends on FB are sound’

        Urm no? Your Pa is a kiddy fiddler. Your best bud wants BJs for lifts? Oh the Lieutenant got himself into massive trouble. Police style.

        Stay safe. Just keep educating yourself. Help others where you can.

        I know this shit is hard but Enlightenment isnt given away for free.

        Best of Britsh, lovely x

  5. Violetta says:

    Some comic relief during quarantine.

    (For relevance, most of these influencers see highly Narcissistic, if not full-out Narcs):

    DM Headline: “Tik-SHOCK! Dancer’s video leaves him feeling ‘sick’… after social media users spot sinister figure lurking on stairs in the background while he’s home alone”

    The consensus is the “mysterious figure” is a cat, which what it looks like to me. He claims he has no pets, but either somebody else’s wandered in, or he’s lying.

    Now for the comments:

    Jus1982, Glim, 13 hours ago

    Whatever it was, his dancing scared it away.

    Connect The Dotz, Woburn_England, 11 hours ago

    Yeah, the dancing is the scariest part of the vid!

    tidydj, Doncaster, United Kingdom, 12 hours ago

    It’s his dignity leaving his body.

    That is 100% a Ghost……. well it would be if your cat was called ‘Ghost’.

    SIMULATION_0218, Sim, United Kingdom, 12 hours ago

    I think everybody is more concerned because he thinks he can dance.

    claudia.rowe, SYDNEY, Australia, 2 hours ago

    Want to feel good about yourself? Meet a millennial.

    Noideawhyireadthis, Nunya, United States, 14 hours ago

    Clearly this person lives in their parents basement so it probably one of them wondering what their idiot child is up to.

    peanutsontoast, Woodland, United Kingdom, 8 hours ago

    ‘Dancing’? I beg to differ.

    imogen88, Cirencester, United Kingdom, 10 hours ago

    Maybe next door coming to take his stereo away.

    CharlesTango, London , United Kingdom, 13 hours ago

    It’s the next door neighbour’s cat coming in to laugh at him.

    And now, my personal favorite comment:

    Cupidstunt69, Cork, Ireland, 9 hours ago

    The poor burglar took one look at that sad crap dancer and gave up his life of crime.

    1. Violetta says:

      *seem highly Narcissistic.

      2nd favorite exchange (ironically, Dana usually posts troll Stan valentines to Meghan Markle):

      Dana Ding, Wilmington, United States, 7 hours ago


      Laurapora, Glasgow, United Kingdom, 7 hours ago

      Whilst he is still inside

    2. Renarde says:


      You gut sum serious shit going down, my sis

      Whatcha need t’do is get hol of the 💚

      I’ve been talkin to me main man. Boi. Hes talkin shit. I’m very disgusted.

      He is sayin, I can give yer stuff and ting

      How much, says I?

      200 on the oz, days he

      I say, man you is bonks, innit? Tho’.?

      I dearly wish me old mucker Rodger was about town. Yardie. Decent tho’. He’d do me a good one.



      1. Violetta says:


        Can I borrow your Burberry scarf and Vauxhall Corsa, innit?

        1. Renarde says:


          You iz can borrow me cashmere wrap and me Nissan Micra.

          And I wouldn’t say that to just N E 1.


          P.S Me wrap is nearly 97% silk with a touch of cashmere. It’s 2 die for.

          Please bring both back in 1 pieze. Innit

          Cheers and tanks.

          P.P.S Iz you indulge in nortiness with me cashmere, pleaze wash it first B4 returnin. Me Julie x

          P.P.S Luvs U

          1. Violetta says:

            Renarde: Laughing like hyena. If neighbors didn’t already think I was barking, this would do it.

          2. Renarde says:


            I’m at this moment listening to my neighbours SCREAMING out to get their dog in. Jesus.

            Very kind words missus. At this disparate times, surely the comedy must get us all energised?

          3. Violetta says:


            Sorry, scarf got manky because West Staines Massiv.

            Imma get you some One Million or Royal Oud instead, innit?

          4. Renarde says:


            You iz kind and ting. But me Mirca, Jo,. Were iz it?

            I iz not calling you out, bruh.

            But I needz me Julie (Jo).

            Keep me pashmina. I just needz me Jo.

            Do I needz to call in the Fedz?

          5. Violetta says:

            Orite ? You say you not callin me out, but you calls the Fedz, ima bang u out dick’ed.

          6. Renarde says:


            I see yer crew RNT EXACTLY ere.

            Do U rely wanna go down wiv thiz shit?

            I az other biz 2 B takin care ov

            Me main man Sujal is desperate to give meez $$$. I gizz he wants me to watch him wank and ting.

            So I sez thiz. You ave the road on the Occy down to MicckyDs from town. I take the rest. Coz u is not avin da indian.

            Let’s shake on it bruh. Man 2 man. U hav me word.

          7. Violetta says:

            Ya startin mayte?

          8. Ashley says:

            Renarde , I love your new picture! Beautiful

          9. Renarde says:

            Aww! So kind Ashley x

          10. Violetta says:

            For those who are not privy to the niceties of ChavSpeak:

            (Actual Britons, please correct me where I am wrong on any of these details):

            There seem to be two primary strains of pretension.

            The first strain is people who pretend to be richer and more important than they are. Their props have historically included gold chains, Nikes or Pumas, and the ubiquitous Burberry beige plaid (and counterfeit versions).

            The second strain is middle-class people pretending to be more street than they are. The gang rivalry Sacha Baron-Cohen describes in Da Ali G Show supposedly takes place in Stained, a thoroughly middle-class enclave.

            The American equivalent would be the guy in the Offspring video for Pretty Fly (For a White Guy).”

          11. Renarde says:


            I salute you.

            And Pretty Fly off a white guy is bangin.

            I always wanted to be one of the dancers in the vid. I could dance at that point but now I have the figure. So I matched!

            I think I’m going to listen to it now!

            Right now. And ting.

            P.S Useless dealers are like the bell end of society? Dodge! Where are you?

            Oh yeah I know. The Carribean.

          12. Violetta says:

            *Staines @#$& autocorrect

    3. Renarde says:

      Madam. You are comedy gold!

      If we were to ever meet IRL, MASSIVE hijinks, shennagains and capers of all sorts would occur.

      May I ask, how good on you on a quick moon?

      Good I trust?

      1. Violetta says:

        Baby Got Back, so not quick variety.

        1. Renarde says:

          Indeed x

          1. Violetta says:

            Actually, I know some people who got really fried at a Tolkien weekend, and wandered around the site at 5 in the morning singing “Baby Got Back” in Elvish.

          2. Renarde says:


            Now you’ve seriously spluttered into the random.

            During this lads A Levels. He lost it. Stood up and apparently tried to convince people his was a fruit! An orange apparently. Poir geezer!

          3. Renarde says:

            Hang on. How can you actually get fried at a Tolkien weekend? How is that even possible?

            They’re all neerds!

  6. Anm says:

    I just noticed you released this book already. I was waiting for it too. I think I confused the release date of your new youtube page with this date. Bought , downloaded, and reading it now! Yay!

    1. HG Tudor says:

      There are two. There is the Narcissist and Covid-19 and then there is the soon to be released The Narcissist in Covid-19 Lockdown. They have different titles and different covers.

  7. WokeAF says:

    HG , Thatcher saying what she said re society , I’ve been thinking a lot about what exactly she meant , can you explain ?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Here is the full quote in context which explains it for you.
      “I think we have gone through a period when too many children and people have been given to understand “I have a problem, it is the Government’s job to cope with it!” or “I have a problem, I will go and get a grant to cope with it!” “I am homeless, the Government must house me!” and so they are casting their problems on society and who is society? There is no such thing! There are individual men and women and there are families and no government can do anything except through people and people look to themselves first… There is no such thing as society. There is living tapestry of men and women and people and the beauty of that tapestry and the quality of our lives will depend upon how much each of us is prepared to take responsibility for ourselves and each of us prepared to turn round and help by our own efforts those who are unfortunate.”

      1. Lorelei says:

        It’s nice to think of the tapestry as so amazing until one is beaten down by narcissists—like herself.

      2. MommyPino says:

        I totally agree with her!!

        1. lisk says:

          Same here, MommyPino!

          1. fiddleress says:

            Well, many who lived under her reign did not agree with her.
            I knew many who did not (was living there at the time, in the more hard hit parts of Britain), and they certainly were not whiners who thought everything should be given to them for nothing.
            I really do not want to sound unpleasant towards you or MommyPino, it’s just that I do get heated up when I remember what I saw then.
            Sorry if I sound abrupt, again, it is not directed at you, but that woman certainly makes my blood boil. Even now that she is six feet under.
            I believe that there is, or there should be, such a thing as society.

          2. lisk says:

            Clearly she can still obtain fuel in death!

          3. Lorelei says:

            Indeed Lisk, and it’s really easy for an elite to say government can’t fix all the woes, etc. True somewhat, but the reality is that many people aren’t equipped to fix their own situation without a ton of support. Public health is reliant on an empathic government structure. Many mental health woes and familial strains are in direct correlation to narcissists and their toxicity.

          4. Cat says:

            Maggie was a bit before me, but she had impact. I went to a concert back in 2003 or 4, Roger Waters from old Pink Floyd. He turned his whole show into a big power point presentation about Margret Thatcher and how much he despised her doings. It felt odd. He did play his nice songs we all recognized. But with huge posters of Maggie behind him. It’s like he did not know that she had left government many years ago. He was obsessed.

            /the guy I went with is a caring empath I much much regret I went away from.

          5. mommypino says:

            Cat, I personally would have been offended if I paid to go to a concert to listen to music and I get lectured about politics. Especially nowadays when it costs a fortune to watch a concert. It is very selfish of the artist and actually really narcissistic.

          6. Cat says:

            Yes Mommypino He was as narcish as Thatcher but completely unaware of himself. I think the Roger Waters concert was in Oslo. Why still teach ppl in Oslo about an ex prime minister of Great Britain?
            Ok so their music from the 80s and The Wall was very much about her. But still. Idk.
            Narcs are weird.

            I realize since knowing Narcsite, that back in the day I must have thought that Labour party ppl couln’t be manipulative…

            Our convictions make us unable to spot narcs.

          7. mommypino says:

            So true Cat!

          8. lisk says:

            It’s easy for anyone to say, because it’s the truth. Government cannot fix all woes. It does a bad job, plus it’s not government’s responsibility.

            As for “empathic government structure”—that actually sounds scary.

          9. mommypino says:

            “ As for “empathic government structure”—that actually sounds scary.”

            It does.

          10. mommypino says:

            Hello fiddleress,

            Thank you for your honesty and I didn’t feel that you were abrupt. Most of us feel strongly about our political leanings and how certain politicians have affected our lives. I respect your own experiences from her leadership and your point of view. I have never been in England and I am not familiar with the political and societal structures there. If you quiz me regarding the things that Margaret Thatcher has done, I would fail miserably. All that I know is that she is known for being the Iron Lady and she was an incredibly brilliant and strong woman based on what I have read about her which is not a lot.

            Separated from who she was or what she did, I personally agree with what she said. The government and society is really nothing if not for the people paying taxes to keep it going or doing charity work to help those who are unable to help themselves. That is the tapestry that I believe she was talking about. I had a friend here who told me something like we have to strengthen ourselves first so we can help others. She gave the example of if the plane is crashing put your oxygen first before putting the oxygen on your loved ones or other people. If people are thriving, the government and society will thrive and these people will be able to help others who are unfortunate so that they can be empowered too. She has said to take responsibility for ourselves so we can turn and help those who are unfortunate. My personal beliefs agree with the quote. I don’t think that people should be forced to do charity work by the government through unreasonable taxation. I believe that people would help more if they feel personal satisfaction from doing it because they are not being forced to. I believe that the government should allow people freedom to reach their highest potential and only act as support. But I also believe that the government should also intervene in certain situations such as regulating the prices of necessities etc. I don’t believe in absolutes.

          11. Renarde says:

            I do not.

      3. WokeAF says:

        Thanks HG!

    2. lisk says:

      I’m not getting this reference. Is this quote in the book?

      1. Narc noob says:

        Lisk, that was on the Quiz..quotes of narcissists. MT was the one who said society doesn’t exist. She was a greater. HG gave us the whole quote as WokeAF asked for it.

        1. lisk says:

          I see. I’m jumping all over this thread now to understand the quote’s context!

        2. lisk says:

          Thank you, Nn!

  8. Renarde says:

    So, I’ve just been listening to Sky and a bit of a car crash interview between Jeremy Hunt (Chair of some Health committee) and the Health Secretary, Matt Hancock.

    His lack of even cognitive empathy is unravelling and fast. Saying he ‘wishes he could just magic aprons out of the air’.

    I mean, REALLY? RE£ALLY?

    The HSE is very clear, every single hazard in the workplace MUST be mitigated by putting in external procedures. But the most common one is of course PPE. For him to just throw is hands in the air and go, ‘If only I could’ is simply not acceptable. You would not ask a welder not to use a helmet, people working with nuclear radiation not to carry a film badge. Why is this any different?

    Moreover, the tooling required for making these gowns HAS to be minimal. I do not understand why our own production facilities haven’t been approached. (I used to be a production engineer). Even as I’m typing this, I’m seeing that Louis Vuitton are making masks.

    Hancock is loosing it. He had a pop at a journalist yesterday discussing scientific advisors. And he was also the guy who issues a warning to the NHS NOT to waste PPE. Utterly disgraceful.

    And actually, the HSE have gone AWFULLY quiet, haven’t they?

    1. christianmelchizedek says:

      One of the things I HATE is knowledge. It ROYALLY sucks when you know something and you can not do a thing with that knowledge except stew on it. I know of a “Tool” that can solve this problem with great efficiency but I am not allowed near it. The “Tool” has a very nice blue laser, with sequential targeting capabilities and is lightning fast and DEADLY accurate. The nice part is whatever is hit by it (the laser) is instantly turned to a pile of carbon. If in my control I would simply give it the parameters to target anything walking with a mask on first! It’s the most humane way (if that is of concern) to take care of the problem, no waste of ground space trying to back fill over the bodies. Think Paradise CA. but much neater, that was a sloppy job!

      1. Lorelei says:

        You don’t have a tool, you are a TOOL and I’m glad I don’t have your personality disorder.

        1. Violetta says:


          Succinctly phrased.

      2. Renarde says:


        Sounds like you’ve got it all covered.

        I’m sorry society looks askance at those who love Mommy ‘a little too much’.

        My deepest condolences.

        1. Lorelei says:

          Renarde—you are funny. I’m being evaluated for red flags by someone right now and it’s hilarious because I can’t say, “I’m not a narcissistic sociopath” because that’s weird!

          1. Renarde says:


            That’s hysterical! Even if you could say it without it sounding odd they would REALLY think you were! 🤣🤣🤣

          2. Lorelei says:

            Renarde—I was drilled with questions. Good ones. I passed. I learned from HG how to hide it. Seriously though—I was impressed. I passed.

          3. Renarde says:


            You been he gave you a verbal NDC?


          4. Lorelei says:

            Yes Renarde. I’ve been drilled and got it again tonight. 100 questions. Worse than an interview. I know how to disguise my dysfunction though and not look like a nut job. Thankfully I have not detected any narcissism, in fact, a detector won’t be needed. I’m positive. Stats: has MBA, cute, 11 years older, successful market researcher, has a lake front cottage, discusses research with enthusiasm, and I’ve not been asked for a dick pic. I’m passing my interviews and haven’t been hit up for sex. I’m actually glad to be under the radar. I was grateful for intelligent discussion. Oh, has a dog that doesn’t appear timid from being yelled at!

          5. lisk says:


            I don’t see how “successful market researcher” is
            NOT a red flag!

            Also, a note about NOT being hit up for sex: Super-cerebral Narcx withheld any real physical contact from me for 2 months (not even a kiss until 1.5 months into it) even though I was definitely desiring it. This “I’m not ready due to too many short-term relationships where I get pulled in and dumped soon after we have sex” story, of course, made him seem like a “nice guy,” and a victim to be treated kindly.

            However; I’m sure he also was withholding for a number of real reasons, one of which was to control me, the other was so he could say to a possible IPPS (unbeknownst to me at the time) that he was only out for dinner with “just a colleague.”

            I thought the non-physical thing was weird at the time. A friend of mine did, too, and warned me to dump him early on. I didn’t heed her warning and got sucked into 7 years of bad luck without even having to break a mirror.

          6. alexissmith2016 says:

            I asked HG about this Lorelei because I had that a few times. HG concurred when I asked if this was more likely to be a mid who believes he’s a greater.

          7. Lorelei says:

            Thanks Alexis—but why would a mid be so stupid and foul? It’s childish.

          8. alexissmith2016 says:

            To ask questions to see if you’re a psycho? My guess would be they’ve newly learned the concept, excited that they are one but their inherent parianoia driven by the fact all their exes are ‘crazy’ makes them think they’ve dated a lot of psychos themselves and they don’t want another one. Of course you would be assessed as not one regardless of how you scored I’m sure during love bombing but what a rubbish test it turned out to be in devaluation. Just a guess tho.

          9. Lorelei says:

            We should love bomb people Alexis. Why not? We both need packages/gifts, etc.

          10. alexissmith2016 says:

            I have been known to do this on occasion. hehehe

          11. WokeAF says:

            This is where I get confused .
            I had thought the narcissism ( in L & MR) would reject the idea they are a narc . I understood they may take on the diagnosis but not fully accept it.
            HG do you think a L or MR would ever SELF diagnose ?

          12. HG Tudor says:

            Lesser would not. Mid Range would be as per The Mid Ranger Who Would Be King, therefore would not recognise what they are.

          13. alexissmith2016 says:

            WokeAF, HG has confirmed in the past that whilst no lesser is capable of recognising himself as an N nor most mids, there is a certain type of mid (usually a LMR or MMR) who believes he is a greater. What this essentially means is that he largely plans instinctively, there is some recognition that he is an N but he is NOT as great as he thinks. The mere fact he gives away clues as to what he is means he lacks the skill of a greater because then there is a power shift to the individual he has confided in. I hope that helps. HG has written a little about this in one of his books, I have the book but I forget which one. Possibly platinum collection? There is a small section about the mid who thinks he is King.

          14. Lorelei says:

            Genius about the power shift by admission Alexis. I have a likely mid “friend” who knows something is wrong with him and he will discuss somewhat jokingly. (He has privately with me) Every bit as bright as some that would be academically cerebral/greater. Credentials unnecessary. Anyway, yes, he’s bright as hell but the true self knowledge isn’t there, and I knew this but could not express why. I really like & enjoy him and to be honest—it’s sad in a way to watch his behavior. I’ve had to talk to him about sexual comments for instance at work. He could offend the wrong person. They trip over their own feet. It’s like true self awareness rests on a chromosome holding substantial intellect, but only few are awarded this feature.

          15. That’s interesting Lorelei that self awareness rests on a chromosone holding substantial intellect. Perhaps that’s where I’m lacking. I feel I have a fairly strong amount of self-awareness, too much sometimes and I’m lacking on the intellect hahahah

          16. HG Tudor says:

            It’s called alcohol AS2016

          17. alexissmith2016 says:

            That causes those who drink alot of the stuff to lack self awareness? Indeed! Thank you for your explanation HG.

          18. HG Tudor says:

            No, the impairment if your intellectual function. I believe we witnessed some evidence of that on the blog a little time ago.

          19. alexissmith2016 says:

            Sorry, I don’t understand?

          20. HG Tudor says:

            Very good, you must be drinking now.

          21. alexissmith2016 says:

            I haven’t been sober since lockdown. If I pause for an hour or so would it help my IQ?

          22. HG Tudor says:

            That ship sailed at the beginning of the lockdown!

          23. alexissmith2016 says:


          24. Renarde says:


            You are bang on.

            I remember an occasion where I visited the Lesser on the States.

            We went out on my behest to Barnes & Noble.

            He got VERY excited by the book, ‘The Sociopath Next Door’. He was positively giddy about it.

            When devaluation occured, it was his Bible.

            I was the narc. The sociopath.


          25. HG Tudor says:

            That book is terrible.

          26. Renarde says:


            Why is it terrible? I do get your point but the stories in there were frightening.

            I was especially drawn to the situation where a secretary in a psychiatrist work scenario diddled around with a make who was needed urgent help and the narc was fucking about with his mental health. According to the book, it was found out and she was dismissed.

            I would really like to know why you found it thusly.

          27. HG Tudor says:

            Too long to go into Renarde, it is poor material trust me on that.

          28. Renarde says:

            OK. Get that. But it frightened me.

          29. HG Tudor says:

            Jaws 3-D frightened some people Renarde, does not mean it was any good!

          30. Renarde says:


            Fair point 💛

          31. Renarde says:


            I am guessing you also font like ‘The Sociopath Next Door’

          32. christianmelchizedek says:

            Hummm do we get out the Dickionary now or later…let’s chek wit Violetta and see what she tinks. Rotflmao.

          33. Renarde says:


            You are more entrancing than watching cats squabble over the last piece of fish.

            Talking about dictionaries, it’s about high time your kind acquainted themselves with the OED.


          34. Violetta says:

            HG: Have you read Fallon’s The Psychopath Inside: A Neuroscientist’s Personal Journey Into the Dark Side of the Brain?

            Whether full Narcissistic destructiveness was not activated by abuse or neglect, or whether some social impulse was activated by an upbringing that was both loving and morally consistent–no ignoring something one day and letting the kid have it for the same thing the next–Fallon makes a strong case that the interaction between neurology and environment is the determining factor, rather than either by itself.

          35. HG Tudor says:

            No, I haven’t but I know of him.

          36. Violetta says:

            I found it a lot more credible than The Sociopath Next Door. I think Stout had a disclaimer somewhere that the stories were composites, not actual people, so the bogus therapist, as creepy as she was, wasn’t an actual case with just the names changed. I thought I recognized some Nurse Ratched in that depiction.

          37. HG Tudor says:

            There is a lot more on “Stout” believe me.

          38. Violetta says:

            Let me guess: is Stout one herself? If she is, I’d guess Do-Goodin’ Mid-ranger.

            Puuuke. I’d rather deal with a Grande Dame like Thatcher or one of Buford’s football hooligans than a Poison Pollyanna.

          39. lisk says:

            Among the Thugs is a great study.

        2. Violetta says:

          Doesn’t sound like Mommy returned his affection.

          1. Renarde says:

            Sadly it does not…😣😥

        3. alexissmith2016 says:

          Thanks Renarde saying I was spot on re the mids who do psycho tests! I’ve had tests done on me by people who have attempted to seduce, I’m married so can’t fall for that again! So I’ve never experienced that side of devaluation so it was litterally a guess on my part based on what I’ve learned from HG. I’m sorry the liitle twerp did that to you!

          1. Renarde says:


            Par for the couse. Sadly.

    2. alexissmith2016 says:

      Problem is Renarde we don’t have any (many) manufacturers left in this country! So we can’t save ourselves at a time when we need to. Everything is outsourced. Everyone expects the UK to be great, no matter what it is. Great healthcare, great food, great football. But we are entirely dependent on others. We’re not great and our weaknesses as a country are being truly exposed. We no longer do anything for ourselves. In fact as a country, we’re next to useless! I do hope Boris decides to review Brexit and that he can see past his own narcissim for the greatness of the future of this country. We are much stronger as a collective.

      1. HG Tudor says:

        Ah AS2016, there’s that word hope again….

        1. alexissmith2016 says:

          hope…sigh! how I used to love that word.

      2. Renarde says:


        I used to work in manufacturing. A Line Engineer on the making of MRI scanners. I know my onions and yes, you are correct.

        When Thatcher broke the Unions, she also broke manufacturing.

        It’s a complex issue. The Unions were out of control. One out, all out etc. But without native own manufacturing this country became lost in a miasma of service industries which mean largely fuck all.

        All countries need a sound manufacturing base or we are forever at the mercy of others who have it.

        We are now reaping the cost of the ‘Winter of Discontent’ in ’75. Inflation adjusted for 2020.

        Personally, I’m ignoring Brexit. Brexit was a ‘McGuffin’ to keep the ‘prolls’ in check.

        It matters not one jot who is in control, either Parliament or the EU. Did you note the Grovelling speech that the EU gave to Italy? That they were sorry they did not help that nation sooner?

        I will at this point draw your attention to the League of Nations which utterly failed Abyssinia and Manchuko before WW2.

        So much money poured into what? Exactly?

        Hope you are ok there. X

        1. alexissmith2016 says:

          You’ve got some interesting points Renarde. All good here! Phew! How are you doing sweetie? How is life in lockdown?

          1. Renarde says:


            Pretty good. I’ve been self isolating
            For a good year. It’s like water off the proverbial.

            I do feel very much for folks that arent battle hardened. It’s a VERY tough gig.

            The sense that you are on your own. No one to help.

            I think you are UK? Matt Hancock needs to be Immediately run out of office. Incompetent doesnt even run close.

            It’s somewhat entertaining to see how this narc is behaving. But if course, peoples lives are at stake.

            Not that he cares. Idiot.

          2. alexissmith2016 says:

            Hhahaha yes I am UK Renarde, Matt is defintiely in the twat school of Ns. possibly type B? I’ve not seen enough of him really. What would you assess him as?

            He struggles to convey much empathy, he recognises on one level that he needs to but its so unnatural. It’s hard to know what we now see as unnatural because we’re HG educated and what would be perceived as unnatural pre-knowledge. There are lots of people I would have found as slimey and uncaring. But I would never have thought or known what I do now.

            People’s lives are at stake. When HG describes in one of his articles how he thinks of us like dolls picks us up moves our head like this, our arm like that etc makes me think of politicians on a massive scale and I feel like puking!

            Yes, I’m breezing this lockdown thing now. First five days I’d say I found really tough even though I work from home 80% of the time. Then once my ET alligned with my LT that this is just how it’s going to be it was an immediate adjustment. Settling in to this quite nicely but I’m very fortunate and have to keep reminding myself of this. I’m not in the vulnerable category, not subject to physical or emotional abuse, no additional stressors. It’s not like that for most of the people and I’m keen to be (will be) getting out to help others very soon. Presently at the mercy of the government!

          3. Renarde says:


            Good one on Hancock. Middle (obvs). I think Upper actually. Some of his words recently such as (paraphrasing) ‘He might be a scientist but he advises the Government’ and of course ‘I wish I could magic PPE out of thin air’ are haughty and condescending.

            I do not like Hitchins of The Fail but he did write how Hancock made him feel like he was back in Prep School being lectured by a PE Teacher.

            I agree.

            Cadre is more troublesome. Not a Victim.I do not think he has the polish of an Elite. Hitchins point is interesting so I am going with Somatic. A UMS.

            What do you think HG?

            Glad you are OK lovely. My lovely neighbours have been giving me food for the Overlords. So much that I wont have to buy anymore for a good month. I gave the kind lady who did this some flowers today. I also got food from the shrew. Who is now being perfectly charming to me. I had great fun today playing with her excitable dog who is gorgeous. I got many licks!

            The mind doth boggle!

          4. alexissmith2016 says:

            Interesting re your analysis of Hancock. I will have to pay more attention to the detail. Largely I just go as far as whether they’re lesser, mid, greater. It’s too hard in my paralytic mind to go beyond that! I’ll take a look once lockdown is over and I’ve sobered!

            I recall watching some children’s animation years ago, I remember many of the characters (not all) had buttons for eyes, I seem to recall there was some significance in their button eyes. Like it meant they were empty souls (Although we don’t technically have a soul so in reality that would count for all of us, HG says we don’t, perhaps that’s just because he’s eaten them all hahaha). I digress, it sticks in my mind because when I look at the eyes of some Ns, it reminds me of that and I just see buttons in their eyes (that’s the LSD trying to break through the gallons of liquor).

            My mind boggles alot!

            I meant to ask Renarde, what did you mean by being in isolation for so long? because of the Ns?

            I got distracted, also meant to say, what is Trump then? an ULN, yes. but Cadre? Would he be an elite because he believes he is both intelligent and somatic? He can’t be victim. I think HG needs a new category where they think they are somatic and think they are intelligent but really they’re neither – Lorelei once described her ex’s current partner as a swamp creature I think? something like that perhaps

          5. HG Tudor says:


          6. alexissmith2016 says:

            feeling privileged to receive that little treat! thank you

          7. WokeAF says:

            Oooh hoo hoo hoo! HG , you’ve said we don’t have a soul !? I missed this! . I tend to suspect that is correct, but I suspect for different reasons –

          8. Lorelei says:

            Woke—am I allowed to strangle a colleague that is carrying on about her tummy ache? Does that make me less of an empath. Is it ok that we hate people?

          9. WokeAF says:

            I don’t know any of the things

          10. Bibi says:

            HG, I see how you say Trump is somatic. A misconception is that somatics are not also bragging about their brains–they do, only they don’t do anything to show for it–they just think they ‘have it.’

            The somatic lesser I knew was a male bimbo who jumped from girl to girl and tattoo to gym to tattoo again but he was convinced he was brilliant b/c he had a Nietzsche quote tattooed on his arm (albeit a very trite phrase from Mr. Fred).

            I also work with a cerebral UMRN and he too is convinced how ‘desirable’ he is, when is merely average looking at best.

            I still laugh at that vid you did about the lesser narc where you said, ‘He has a bald pate, a pot belly and is missing half his teeth yet he thinks he is Mr. Lover Lover Man.’

          11. HG Tudor says:

            You are correct.

            The quote tattooed on the arm entertained me.

          12. alexissmith2016 says:

            That’s where I get a bit confused Bibi, who is cerebral, elite or somatic? With most it is pretty obvious but there are some, e.g. pantman, he is a MMRN who believes he looks like George Clooney, he most definitely does not. He is highly intelligent to the point he dominates conversations and lacks any self awareness whatsoever. I mean zero! He lacks any charm etc etc I see him as cerebral, but he would probably see himself as elite. And that’s where I get confused. Is it because he lacks the charm and other qualities of an elite which makes him cerebral even though he perceives himself to have those qualities but others would not. He is always giving guys tips on how to pick up women. They (the guys) and the females all laugh about him behind his back.

          13. Lorelei says:

            Alexis, your discussion of pantman is amusing. I need to see his pants. I have a forearm man who is ridiculous but he is so hot I melt and have to walk away, but his behavior is similarly idiotic. (He’s not made fun of openly except by those of us he is molesting!) He’s got to be a type B mid. Embarrassing thought to be attracted to, but if you saw him you’d understand. It’s ridiculous to be so beautiful and yet be so disordered. It’s a waste of flesh. Luckily we are covered in PPE lately so I’m having palpitations less frequently. He makes me weak like no other. He eats peaches as you know. I know pantman doesn’t do that for you thankfully. I saw a narcissist become hero in a really intense physical altercation last night, and observed the well fueled after effects & this felt so forensic and supportive of how HG has created this perfect lexicon & how it drives our thinking. It also renders a perfect example of how they appear heroic and a great person, and how the fuel flows. I watched and absorbed the demonstration. I know I added to it because I helped clean his bloody body but it seemed the polite thing to do, although unnecessary as he was tending to himself. I’m sure he liked it because he hates me and won’t talk to me because HG said once that I’d obviously threatened his control, he was eating up my subservience. (He deserves it though—it was truly a magnificent act) The powerful feeling achieved and the bravado and the well fueled demeanor.. It was narcsite text book. I feel fortunate my forensic lessons continue despite COVID due to my work!

          14. alexissmith2016 says:

            I do not know what his pants look like. I started straight ahead of me. so I can’t comment. I imagine (if my imagination will let me go to my version of asylum of grotesque) they would be teabag y-fronts ewwwy!

            Peachman sounds much better – at least he is icandy!

            Peachman and Pantman – could make TV series hahah

            I have found that when we are challening to them they don’t like it too much.

            One N was a bit of a twat just prior to lockdown, I wounded him. I hoovered him (an empath hoover, its a new thing lol). He responded and called me a couple of days later and was all rather pleasant. He replies if I message him but has not instigated any contact. I presume he has a new IPSS (he is married – long term) or my wounding pissed him off. I’m annoyed with myself a little, I wanted to understand how lockdown would affect him and I was hoping to learn.

            Pantman is deleriously buzzing with fuel at present which makes me want to puke! He goes through these cycles regularly though. Whenever there is a high it is always followed by a huge huge low.

            Anyway. I’d also like to watch peachman eating some peaches, PPE or not. I bet his pants are sexy too!

            Pleased your forensic lessons continue.

          15. Lorelei says:

            I’m sure peachman doesn’t tongue tie too easily. I have never been moved to weakness like this. I’m weak weak and sick. I just know he’s excellent in bed.

          16. Would it help if I tested him out for you. I could then provide an honest opinion combined with a rating.

          17. Lorelei says:

            Let’s have HG evaluate! Is there a written test for such skills. I’m telling you—my friend said he can eat a peach. I’m drinking my Absolut Raspberry vodka and I’m half three sheets to the wind. I’m with an icy mid who loves me and I love him. But he’s old so he is like just a friend forever and ever. We planted trees and flower bulbs and we are cooking a pound cake. I broke out crystal glasses that were a wedding gift from that worthless fuck I married. But the glasses are pretty. I got China out of the wedding too From my disordered father. I have glassware shit all over this place. It’s a lemon pound cake. I dont need it because I’m on a diet because COVID is making me fat. The gym is closed. My pants are tight and this sucks but I’m just going to drink more.

          18. alexissmith2016 says:

            Sounds like you have plenty of drinking vessels Lorelei. I bet you’re not fat either. Drinking more sounds like a great idea. That always helps make me feel slim ahaha I hope you had a good night x

          19. Lorelei says:

            Alexis—I am really glad my drinking is infrequent. I feel like hell. It’s not my fault though. It’s the virus. It’ll be a few weeks at least before I do that again. My elderly friend confessed all his infidelities with his ex wife though & I just knew I was right about him! It was one strip club story after another. I knew it I knew it. The baton is in your hand—I want a sober life.

          20. Lorelei says:

            I have a June bug.

          21. WokeAF says:

            “ I hoovered him (an empath hoover, its a new thing lol).“
            LOL it is a thing .

          22. alexissmith2016 says:

            Also I meant to say (but forgot because my convo was digressing all over the place) that it’s quite unbelievable what they take as a wounding sometimes. Honestly, the fact you’re asleep ffs! I do a lot of sleeping so I must be constantly wounding hahha

          23. Lorelei says:

            When peachman told me his wife never sleeps with him I told him maybe he wasn’t very good in bad. But I know better. I just know. Here is the cocaine analogy—if I do it once I’ll think I’m ok. A half hour later I want another line. I rationalize it. I keep rationalizing and as I do things unravel. The end is always the same. Empty bag and looking desperately for a way to put odds and ends of powder together to get one more line. But it’s gone. It’s always gone and not even a promise of a line in the corner of the bag. Frantically looking for just one more hit and it’s not there and I’m depleted. Little worse than coming off cocaine than narc withdrawal, especially when it was really good. I knew better than to flirt long with cocaine and this has to be similar.

          24. Oh god! The ole, my wife doesn’t sleep with me any more like! Cocaine is much better than a man who can eat peaches x

          25. Lorelei says:

            I’m not sure if cocaine is better—I knew better than to dabble for long but that was years ago.

          26. WokeAF says:

            Helluva drug

          27. Lorelei says:

            A potentially better drug is an anti-malarial one with promise of protection if given in a prophylactic manner. I start it next week as part of a clinical effort. Unfortunately no party drugs! But maybe I’ll live to party?

  9. E&L says:

    On this post:

    Cat says:
    April 5, 2020 at 12:10
    A very pretty N then. Id est Brad has been engaged to 3 different narcs? I think the world has judged him too harshly for the breakups indeed.

    HG Tudor says:
    April 5, 2020 at 13:09
    It has

    Having reread this, one might infer that Brad has been the “victim” of three Very Famous Narcisissts: Gwyneth the assault victim, Jen A. the bullied beauty, and Angie the man-eater…

  10. christianmelchizedek says:

    Oh for Christ’s sake…it took me f**king ever just to scroll to the bottom of this thread to post a comment…I have never seen so much dribble and diatribe come from so many! Grinder and Tinder activity is at an all time high…”No Contact” Right… my ass…The Gays are still cock gobbling (with a mask of course). The breeders will NEVER stop, like roaches they are drawn to the living dead things called women that bleed and never die. “The vagina is a self cleaning oven” Nasty!!! how come that thing is always smelling up my air and it sure has a LOT of issues…the best thing is to put a vacuum up it and don’t stop the suction until the brain comes out!

    1. Violetta says:

      Definite virgin.

    2. WokeAF says:

      ML, HG?

    3. Renarde says:


      ‘…like roaches they are drawn to the living dead things called women that bleed and never die’

      THIS^ is fucking spooky AF!. It’s like you have contacted Mystic Meg or sommet!

      Or, you are spying on me!

      Which is it, Sir?! Confess or I will unleash (or request nicely) the female black hunter Overlord upon your household. She holds full dominion over the ‘Powers of Darkness’. In fact, she would relish the opportunity. I told her about your HG Pussy Protocol Cuckolding Scheme and she might have got a ‘tad confused’.

      She rared up and yowled her cute little head off. I couldn’t catch much but this came through…

      ‘…and you can tell that cunt that the last time I was in Hades, I saw his mother sucking goats’

      Does this make any sense??

      1. christianmelchizedek says:

        I am rolling with laughter!!!

      2. Kim e says:

        I am so over this low low low low range thing I could 🤢🤢🤢

        1. Renarde says:

          Kim e

          He sure is a beaut!

    4. Getting There says:

      Christian, are you a member of INCEL?
      I have questions for you if you are!

      1. christianmelchizedek says:


        1. Violetta says:

          They turned him down for being “too weird.”

          1. christianmelchizedek says:

            I joined Mensa in ’92 it was the only place for the Genuinely “too weird”. I thank you.

          2. lisk says:

            It was the only place that would have you.

        2. Getting There says:

          You sound like I expect one to sound being angry and anti women and attacks the idea of sex. What a shame. I will continue my search to find one to ask my questions then.

          1. christianmelchizedek says:

            It’s not by choice I refrain from sex…trust me. It’s the lack of a suitable candidate.

          2. christianmelchizedek says:

            Just become one and find your answer for yourself.

          3. MommyPino says:

            Hello Getting There, I remember my MR sister used to be so proud of being accepted in Mensa. I asked my brother if it was true and he said that they were both accepted when they were young but after the first meeting he never came back because it wasn’t his cup of tea. He didn’t elaborate why but it’s just funny that my sister made it sound like it made her so important while my non narcissist brother didn’t care for it.

          4. MommyPino says:

            Hello Getting There,

            Also I just daw tout response at the You Are Being Conned thread. I didn’t get notification again. I usually get email notofications of tout reaponses but when HG takes a break from moderating I notice that I don’t get a notification after he comes back to moderate. My guess is there is a time frame where the notification gets sent. Anyway, I will reply tomorrow as I am getting ready for my son’s birthday. It’s so nice to read your response and I have a lot of thoughts that your comments inspired. Take care my friend!! 💗

          5. Getting There says:

            Christian, no thanks on the joining. I can be curious from afar on the internal and social development of a person who later joins such a group. “Candidate?” Is sex or you the prize for the other person?

            Hello, Mommypino! I’m so glad you wrote and shared here! I look forward to reading your thoughts on the other thread! I know someone in Mensa. He didn’t bring it up; others would. I have the impression that society thinks of it on a pedestal and some members adopt that belief. Your sister must have received plenty of fuel inside the meetings and outside when sharing.
            You do have me thinking, though. The type of intelligence people connect with Mensa starts early in life and as you shared about your sister and brother joining young. How many members were treated Golden by their parents and education system because of the intelligence?

          6. mommypino says:

            Great question. All of my half siblings were treated as Golden Child but by different parents. My dad’s wife was told by her dad when she was little that he wished that she was a boy. He was a narcissist and she was his only child. When my three siblings were young my dad’s wife convinced my dad that she will raise the girls and he will raise their son. They all lived together as a family but my dad was not allowed to participate in the decision making with regards to the two girls. The two girls were raised where they were free to do anything that they wanted, no boundaries and no rules. His wife believed that it will empower them as women. My dad on the other hand raised my brother with rules but they did activities together which was centered on sailing which was expensive and my sisters believed that our dad spoiled him on that. Both the girls turned out to be narcissists while my brother is a normal.

          7. WokeAF says:

            I recall many many months ago, someone squawked at me that I must be mistaken over having had a excellent parents and a safe secure childhood , that it would be unusual to be a narc magnet if so .

            I take it now that we know it’s a genetic addiction to Narcs, HG, does that clear up the idea that we must’ve been done wrong as kids?

            My dad is a normal and my mum was a carrier Empath and they lovingly produced a little Contagion. Surely this isn’t so strange then, that is have both the genetic addiction to narcs and be a magnet for them , simply as the Empath I am?
            (And yet have , from good parenting ,the core foundation of self worth to escape each narc, even before knowing what they are)

            I think it’s important it be known that safe , loving parents produce empaths and these empaths are still narc magnets .

          8. mommypino says:

            Hello WokeAF, I totally agree with you! My dad’a parents we’re both empaths and raised him with love and he still ended up being a narc magnet. He married a narc and he had a mistress in the other end of the world who is also a narc. And he never figured it out. He stayed in that love less marriage with his wife until she died and after her death he kept on talking to me about her narcy behaviors not to judge her or to tell me that she was bad but to tell me how troubled she was from her upbringing and he was trying to still figure her out. Until the end he was trying to understand why she was that way like she was some unsolved mystery to him. His need to fix people really screwed him up although if he didn’t become a Dirty a Empath I wouldn’t be alive and my cute kids wouldn’t be alive either so there are always silver linings lol.

          9. mommypino says:

            Also Getting There, I think that my siblings were treated as Golden Child not because of intelligence but because of how their parents were. I am actually not sure if my brother’s upbringing would qualify as a Golden Child. My dad was always extremely proud of him but he always had rules. My initial thought was probably wrong, my brother was not a Golden Child.

          10. Bibi says:

            Mensa is just for braggarts.

            1) If you are not interested in the meetings then what is the point of joining other than to merely brag that you are ‘smart’ enough to enter? Yay me, I have the mind of an accountant!

            2) Just b/c you meet others with ‘high IQ’ doesn’t mean you have anything in common.

            3) IQ is a measure of functionary logic and the file drawer mind, so those creatives, you are fucked b/c your mind does not fall into their conventional system. Adios, Shakespeare, Dickinson and Kafka. You don’t compare to the functionary number cruncher. Boo hoo! You suck!

            4) There is no reason to mention your IQ ever–unless it is vanity. It is pointless. What does it prove? Who cares? What have you written? What have you discovered? Or do you just repeat what you have been told?

            If you score high on that test, good for you. But know it is just one test and there are many different types of intellects.

          11. christianmelchizedek says:

            Wouldn’t you love to know all the answers to those questions, sadly you never will besides you wouldn’t understand them.

          12. mommypino says:

            Bibi that’s probably why my brother didn’t keep going there after the first meeting. He isn’t a braggart in the same way our sister was. He is proud of his accomplishments but he doesn’t bring them up and if he does there is usually a self deprecating joke attached to it.

          13. Getting There says:

            That’s sad how your stepmom felt because of her father’s comment and then further took actions that then hurt her children. I see children who are smart with other characteristics, but have seen family friends brag about the intelligence alone. When the most attention you receive is due to one trait, I wonder if that is the trait you think you are alone. In your step sister’s case, if she is living in the Wild West as a child, but the structure of school and the recognition of working at something and earning it, I can see that becoming an important trait. I read somewhere that dads should not repetitively state “you’re a princess” or “you’re so beautiful” to their daughters because the belief is that the daughters then think that is what is important and not brains, humor, or sense of self.

            I agree with you. I don’t have a narcissist as a parent. I think empaths can teach their children to be empaths. I was taught as a child about helping others, accepting others as they are and loving them in spite of you constantly hurt, recognizing what impact you have on others, give of yourself, love can conquer anything. When I have talked with my parents about this, they reminded me of other things they said. I then remembered that they did say those and if I had taken those to heart instead, I wouldn’t be at this site today as I would have been a normal.

          14. mommypino says:

            Getting There,
            I wonder about what WokeAF also said about genetics. I remember FYC was talking about the effect of genetics as well in the creation of an empath. It must have been that you have genes that causes some empathic traits to be strongly hardwired in you that even though your parents told you about the other pieces of advice that would have made you less empathic, you didn’t even recall them until they reminded you because it didn’t resonate with you as much as the advice on how to be empathic. The empathic words resonated with you much more deeply because that is who you are to begin with. Just my thoughts.

            I think I now understand what you meant about being treated sa a golden Child because of intelligence. I think I missed what you meant when I wrote my first responses. I think that you have a great point. That is probably why she ended up being an Elite instead of a Somatic. Our dad was indeed extremely vocal about praising us about our looks. Although she kept on telling me that he never told her that she was beautiful but our dad always told me how beautiful she is. His relationship with his daughters was so constricted like he didn’t know how to connect with them anymore. It was weird that he felt more able to express himself freely with me when we have never met in person until I was 26. Sometimes I wonder if my dad was a narcissist too but because of many other factors such as never abandoning his obligations with me and the many times his emotions felt strong and real I still currently believe that he was an empath. But one of the narcish things that he loved doing to me was telling me that to be truly honest I am the prettiest daughter he has but he told me to never tell my siblings that he said that. And he says that in a mischievous manner like it’s our secret. I don’t know if normal dads do that. I have never seen my husband do that to his daughters. He never compared them, not even secretly. But I have also observed that my dad was much more highly narcissistic than my husband. So I think that my dad’s emphasis on how women should look attractive and their mom’s emphasis on intelligence caused my sister to be an Elite. But to address your original point about being treated special because of those traits, yes both my sisters have gotten many compliments about their looks being the stereotypical blonde California girls but only the middle sister got compliments about her intelligence. The older sister I believe is a Somatic Upper Lesser.

          15. mommypino says:

            Getting There, I feel that I have to add that even though that gesture of my dad was narcish I thought that he was really sweet to me to tell me that. But it still looks narcissistic lol but he was really sweet and cute. 😊

  11. Bibi says:

    Anyone else here slummin’ it? Other than routine exercise and shower, I wear no makeup, no jewelry, hair in bun to accommodate face mask. Jeans and tee. I need a brow wax, a hair trim and a pedicure. Been testing how long to not wash my hair–went 2 days and is a little oily but ok. Still smells good. My hands, however, are impeccably clean with all the soap and sanitizer.

    In England do they spell it sanitiser? I’ll bet they do.

    1. Cat says:

      Idk, there all all there zoom meetings. I kinda comb my hair. Also washing it at times. But that’s a stretch.

      1. Cat says:

        *There are all these zoom meetings

        The Samsung autocorrect must be a narc.

    2. Lorelei says:

      Bibi—no makeup and no hair styles. (No point and I’m not able to at work because I’m covered in mask/hair/eye stuff). I did my own pedicure and had my hair trimmed/colored recently.

    3. Kiki says:

      Yes but it’s a tiny price to pay considering those in induced comas in critical condition.
      Watching the protests in US to remove lockdown is truly shocking some woman whinging about her grey roots , a Darwin moment methinks,

    4. Renarde says:


      We do yes!

      I need to do me roots and dye my eyebrows. I did pluck them the other day. That’s pretty much it for my beauty regime. I was born a ginger and turned dark but bizarrely a lot of my eyebrows, my arms and my legs have blond hair. So I don;t bother with legs any more. I’m not very hairy.

      I gave myself a pedicure the other day and have bought a face mask. But I gave myself another mask the other day whilst watching the ‘Lair of the White Worm’. Watch it if you can, it’s on Youtube for free, it’s utterly bonkers!

      1. Violetta says:


        Any Scots in your ancestry? One ex (half-Scottish) had some pretty arbitrary pigmentation.

        1. Renarde says:


          Yes, my surname is Scottish.

          1. Violetta says:

            May well be a factor. He had blonde hair but reddish beard and eyebrows.

    5. Bibi says:

      I am certain all you ladies still look beautiful. Let us embrace our pioneer days. Willa Cather, it is!

  12. E&L says:

    Regarding Jennifer Aniston…

    February 11, 2020 / Last updated : February 11, 2020 HG Tudor
    Johnny Depp v Amber Heard – Telephone Call Analysis

    1. theletterafterj says:

      Thank you E&L
      I didn’t see HG’s confirmation on this thread re: Jen and I was just curious about the original convo.

      Alexissmith2016 says:
      February 12, 2020 at 11:45
      Hope, HG has previously identified Brad as the empath, Angelina a greater and jen a mid. Just pointing this out to assist in your understanding and ability to move forward.

      1. E&L says:

        Moi aussi! Where the hell is an HG authentication in writing? Until then…it is only hearsay and possibly heresay!

        1. Lorelei says:

          I think Angelina is a psychopathic mid ranger, not a self aware individual. Either way, she’s a vampire.

          1. lisk says:

            At least she was attractive before she went started self-harming via plastic surgery.

        2. theletterafterj says:

          Hahahaha…correct! It’s hearsay/heresy until we can find confirmation. If it’s somewhere on the blog, I am sure one of us might stumble onto it sooner or later.

          1. E&L says:


            Glad you understood and corrected my misspell of heresy. My CoD creature is stomping around upstairs in my mind reminding me what a fucking idiot I am. Hence, I am one key stroke away from disaster and/or humiliation.

          2. K says:

            Hahahahaha…I had no idea that you had spelled it wrong; I thought it read: heresy. Don’t beat yourself up; I recently wrote: thrust me, instead of: trust me and I read: Instagram, not Ingram, in one of alexissmith2016’s comments. Shit happens!!!

          3. WokeAF says:

            I recall seeing HGconfirm JA as a narc . I don’t recall seeing the school .
            I was very surprised.
            It must’ve been in the last few weeks bc I didn’t read the whole thread to follow up. (limited time lately)

            NOW I’m intrigued. AJ is a GREATER? LMao

            So we noticed this right ;


  13. Stella SHELF Unmaskers says:

    My Narc’s reaction about pandemic has been that he continued posting politic symbols on his facebook page as if nothing had happened ’til the end of March. Then, about 2 weeks ago, he wrote that he would stop posting “because of the situation”, concluded with “thank you softly”, and disappeared from all his social media. Assuming that I shouldn’t have gone and see what he was doing, and that I breached my no contact regime (I am guilty, I admit that…), and assuming also he didn’t catch the virus, I wonder why he’s behaving in such a way. Could this be a manipulation? If so, what kind of fuel is he going to gather by completely disappearing from social media? By the way, he is a middle mid range, as you stated in my last narc-detector, and he hasn’t got an Intimate Primary Source.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Yes, it is a manipulation. He is focussed elsewhere and wants people to contact him (through other means) to enquire as to his well being and ensure that he is okay. It is a silent treatment which is a form of provocation and yet another method of asserting control.

      1. Stella SHELF Unmaskers says:

        Indeed since 25th of April, (in Italy The Liberation Day) he has been posting again although nothing has happened, and without say anything about his absence, although the emergency wasn’t finished yet. I had thought him to be in a fuel crisis owing to lockdown, and now that it might be over in a few days he feels a sense of relief so he keeps on behaving as usual. However in most of your work there are minutely described all his typical behaviors, it’s really unbelievable!

  14. Kiki says:

    HG Ihabe not been here in a few months
    I’m terrified
    I hate Trump but I will say he is on the right path with the WHO.
    I’m not a lunatic but a scientist and everything in my gut says this bastardised virus is genetic modification.
    An innocent escape yes but there is a lot of crap being covered up

    1. mommypino says:

      Kiki, Some people will always disagree with Trump whether he’s right or wrong and that’s fine. But I agree that he needs to go after WHO. I can’t believe that WHO relied on China’s statement that there was no human to human transmission after they were not even allowed to go in and inspect for themselves. Even a regular auditor would only issue a disclaimer of opinion if not allowed to have access or finish the auditing procedures. No auditor would parrot the claim of any company if they were not allowed to verify the accuracy of the claim. One would think that WHO would at least have the same diligence since countries rely on the things that they have to say. Also for WHO to criticize Trump for the travel ban to and from China was not just wrong but absolutely dangerous. The director of WHO, Tedros also looks like an Upper MR to me and reminds me of Dr. Nuwan.

      1. mommypino says:

        * I should say no auditor ‘in his right mind’ would parrot a company’s claim without being able to verify. They would open themselves up for a lot of troubles for that. WHO should be held accountable too.

        1. lisk says:

          WHO is a very organizational narcissist, and highly political, too.

          The CDC is not far behind.

          All wanting to gain control of our bodies.

          1. mommypino says:

            So true.

  15. Michelle says:

    Ugh, AeroNarc, an “angel” type, is posting things online to help people avoid the spread of germs. Cringe.

  16. Michelle says:

    My “Angel” AeroNarc is posting sunset pictures on social media to cheer people up and getting all kinds of fuel in response. Is he desperate yet, one wonders? I bet he knows he won’t be getting fuel from me . . .

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Why are you looking at the narcissists social media? That is a no contact breach.

  17. alexissmith2016 says:

    Jesus Covid-19 should be renamed to hoover-19time!

    You were so right HG, even my second cousin four times removed has been hoovering

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Indeed AS2016, that’s why it is important that people pay heed to my work, as I know you do.

      1. MB says:

        I think being bored, isolated, lonely makes us very susceptible to hoovers right now too. It really is the perfect storm for us to get ensnared again.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Hence why the 50% discount remains in place and more than ever my loyal readers will disseminate my work and platforms wideky

          1. Kiki says:

            HG I’m a fan of yours really you helped me .And I say this kindly but some people need to get their head out of their arse re narcissism right now .
            It is the least of our worries.
            Trust me on that one .

      2. Agreed. Also why it’s incredibly important you tell us who all the Ns and Es are (celebrity ones). Then we can be really prepared. No doubt this would also help us to help you spread your message far and wide mwah xxxx let’s start with Lorraine K (I hope not) and Holly H (definitely an N) and Bob G (don’t really care either way).

        1. Cat says:

          Looking at Google images: Geldof seems kind and humble and a bit torn by life. All that HG describes empaths as being.

          1. I’m not sure Cat. I haven’t studied him at all so I truly have no thoughts one way or another. But I do know that many Ns are incredibly capable of coming across as humble and torn. But as you say many empaths genuinely can be humble and torn.

            I had thought Sheridan Smith was an empath. Again not someone I’ve ever studied but I had thought she came across as very loving towards her parents in an interview I saw, it appeared genuine.

            HG confirmed she was an N.

            I find it much more tricky with celebrities as I need to interact with them in order to fully appreciate what they are and I would say there are only a small percentage of every day people whom I’m unable to categorise now. But I need to feel it in order to be certain myself.

        2. Cat says:

          Hm, reply button only found to this comment, but I have read the wikipedia of Bob Geldof, the reminders, AlexisSmith2016, and yes, it is worrying that both his exwife and his daughter died in drugrelated issues. Also Michael Hutchence died.

          In love triangles, as HG states, there is usually a N involved. And then that’s Paula Yates? Well, idk, but I do admit that people around Geldof seem to have been feeling miserable, which can be a red flag.
          Or the sign of an empath not leaving, but taking care of family as best as he can. Idk.

          1. Intrepid Traveller says:

            I always thought Bob Geldof came over as quite controlling. Bit telling?

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Anybody who desires to shoot the whole day down is clearly exhibiting a need for control.

      3. Alexissmith2016 says:

        HG, what is Keir Starmer? Of course an N but which school?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Capable individual

          1. Alexissmith2016 says:

            I fucking hate you! So god damn Fucking much!

            Anyone else who would like to answer I will love you for all eternity 💋

          2. Alexissmith2016 says:

            Hate you

          3. Alexissmith2016 says:

            Hate you!

          4. hate you! I#’ve even come upstairs to use my laptop (because it’s easier) to hate you some more!

          5. hate

          6. I even got tired of hating you but I still hate you!

          7. still, even now! I still hate you. Just in case you were under any illusion that I iidnt. I still do.

          8. HG Tudor says:

            I’d stop drinking if I were you.

          9. Hmmm thanks HG. My teeny sober brain now realises you mean he’s a greater because you wouldn’t call a mid a capable individual. Thank you. Xx

          10. HG Tudor says:

            Still drinking I see.

          11. alexissmith2016 says:

            Well what the hell does that mean? That he’s not a greater then? I’m guessing not now? Especially after your comment to Violetta re believing his own lies. I don’t know anything about him and I’ve never even heard him speak but he is definitely 1 trillion percent a narc because his eyes are the deadest I’ve ever seen.

            Anyway what ever he is. I had lots of fun! I was laughing even more this morning reading through my comments than I was last night as I was writing them (I’m such a god damn loser for that lol) Uh god the sad little fun you can have drinking during lockdown hahah

          12. HG Tudor says:


          13. alexissmith2016 says:

            Jesus Christ. You’re kidding me! How can his eyes be so dead if he’s not? What the hell? Now I’m extremely confused. Okay I’ll have to watch him very very carefully indeed

          14. HG Tudor says:

            I did not say he is. I did not say he is not.

          15. He definitely is. I just watched a short interview. When he talks about things which would require some emotional input, there is nothing at all. He looks as dead on the outside as he does inside.

          16. alexissmith2016 says:

            Please can you do a game of guess who then. A bit like the quizzes.

          17. HG Tudor says:

            I shall consider it, but first you must conquer your drinking problem!

          18. Typical N always projecting and blameshifting

          19. theletterafterj says:

            Honestly, I can’t tell “if” he is a narcissist; I just watched: Keir Starmer’s Labour leadership acceptance speech in full – video.

            However, if KS is a narcissist, my money is on MMRN.

          20. alexissmith2016 says:

            I will be interested to find out. I definitely need to see more of him and try and learn more about individuals using the ‘A very’ series.

          21. FYC says:

            Um, Alexis, sounds like love-hate to me. 😉

          22. theletterafterj says:

            Hahahahahaha….it most certainly does!

          23. Violetta says:

            Or share it with the rest of us. Seems to be pretty high-proof, so good for reducing flu virus. Very important for us all to look after our health in these [hu-UKK] difficult times.

        2. K says:

          Hahahaha…I don’t know anything about Keir Starmer but he looks like a MMRN.

          1. WhoCares says:


            If he is an MMRN, he looks to be a very high achieving one.

          2. theletterafterj says:

            He looks damn good so he could be an UMRN. Greaters are rare so I usually stick with the most common school (midrange) if they don’t look like a lesser.

          3. WhoCares says:


            Greaters are rare – true. I have never see him talk etc…just from images he seems pretty stiff. I suspect Greaters to have more cognitive empathy and at least ‘fake’ a bit more emotion – even Taylor Swift can do this I think.
            I am currently trying to figure out if Justin Trudeau is a mid-ranger…if he is an empath – he is the calmest Empath ever.
            K, I have never paid this much attention to political leaders; don’t care much for politicians.

          4. theletterafterj says:

            You and me both; politics can be boring. With Trump, it’s like a three-ring circus, however, I do watch him so I can practice my narcissism lessons. There’s so many manipulations; it’s amazing!

            I watched: Keir Starmer’s Labour leadership acceptance speech in full – video and, if he is a narcissist, my money is on MMRN; I don’t know much about Justin Trudeau to form an opinion.

            I liked PM Tony Blair, especially when you compare him to “W” George W. Bush. The contrast was great.

          5. WhoCares says:


            I may have to do some comparative video watching!
            I need real life examples to apply my learning. Specifically, if Trudeau is a narcissist he has to be upper mid-range or a greater…too polished and calm…I just don’t think that an empath can be that collected and calm off the cuff. Sorry to focus on him; I was just listening to him on the radio.

            Trump is actually entertaining and reads like a true upper lesser showing his colours these days.

          6. WokeAF says:

            I am 🇨🇦 And I don’t take much more of politics, but I in obviously watching his daily address, and I fucking hate the sound of his stupid “soothing” voice and his stupid face now and I never felt that way before. I believe he is a UMR or LG and he’s so smooth I gotta think LG
            I am happy w the way he’s handling things so far though.

          7. WhoCares says:

            Woke – I listened to him live on the radio this morning (so no visual distractions) and there is something in his tone. Something off, but I cannot put my finger on it. He just makes it look too easy – so completely unperturbed…unflustered.
            You might be close to the mark.

          8. WokeAF says:

            Yes his facade is excellent. Verrry smooth. But he doesn’t speak like a normal person. I don’t know the words rehearsed, the empathy is rehearsed.
            However he’s not an UG .
            Maybe MG …. but my best guess is LG.

            The way he speaks actually reminds me of American Psycho/ Christian Bale.

          9. WhoCares says:

            Eeek…”The way he speaks actually reminds me of American Psycho/ Christian Bale.”
            Honestly, not a comparison I had considered. Possibly, because of the good guy image he projects – or desires – you’re right though; there’s a definite smoothness there.
            Plus charm.

          10. alexissmith2016 says:

            Thanks K! He definitely does look like one for sure! I’m just confused now thet HG didn’t call him a twat

          11. HG Tudor says:

            Because I know him better than you do.

          12. hmmmmm HG, are you Keir Starmer?

          13. HG Tudor says:

            That’s Sir, to the likes of you thank you very much

          14. Hahahaha good one! I like it!

          15. HG Tudor says:

            You’re welcome!

          16. theletterafterj says:

            My pleasure alexissmith2016!
            He does look like a capable individual. Perhaps he is less twatish than other narcissists.

          17. alexissmith2016 says:

            gaggh now I’m as confused as when HG confuses me lol

            I wish I was more interested in politics

        3. autiempath says:


          He blinks a lot on the Twitter announcement movie.
          That could be an indication of lying.
          But oh well, they are all liars.
          I’m guessing Upper mid-range Elite.

          1. HG Tudor says:

            If he is a narcissist, he believes the lies and therefore the supposed indicator of lying is inapplicable.

          2. autiempath says:

            Ah yes, thanks.
            That makes sense.

          3. HG Tudor says:

            You are welcome.

          4. theletterafterj says:

            Re: lies and Keir Starmer, your comment explains why Jim Carey believes his own bullshit.


          5. alexissmith2016 says:

            Thanks Autie. Hmmmm well if th blinking is not an indication of lying per se, it could be an indication of lacking controlneeding to obtain control. I will have to check this out. Thanks for the tip off!

          6. Presque Vu says:

            Kier .. nope I’ve got bad vibes. I don’t like him. Alexis is right his eyes are dead dead!

            Interestingly I watched Sophie Ridge on Sunday this morning interviewing our Health Secretary Matt Hancock who reminded me COMPLETELY of how HG speaks!! HG’s is a bit of a lower tone but some of a Hancock’s is too. I was washing the dishes and thought is that HG on the telly? 😆


          7. Presque Vu says:

            I watched trump talk about wearing masks but he doesn’t think he will, it’s optional, kings, queens, the president, dictators nah not good for him and he doesn’t think he will do it. I was laughing so much!! The guy is totally comical in everything he does! He’s so funny! Afterwards, Melania took to Twitter to ask everyone to be safe and wear masks! A little bit of ‘fuck you’ there I think to Trump 😆

          8. K says:

            Presque Vu
            Hahahaha… classic lesser behavior, in light of significant scientific evidence, he denies the seriousness of the virus and asserts control by declaring he will not be wearing a mask (that’s for the little people (contempt)); Trump is omnipotent and the rules don’t apply to him after all.

            Hahahaha…Melania’s ‘fuck you’ tweet is challenge fuel! Disagree with a narcissist and you can expect a malign manipulation to get you back under control real fucking fast!

            My daughter and I laugh when we watch him speak; he’s a riot.

          9. Rebeka says:

            For the record, covid-19 is a mild flu, at worst… It has not killed anyone. If anyone has died “from” covid-19, that’s bogus bs.. they may have died “with” it, but not from it. People need to do the research and wake up please! This is important!

          10. lisk says:

            Presque Vu says @April 5, 2020 at 17:19

            “is that HG on the telly?”

            Oh, my, gosh. No way! That man has such a wimpy, whiney voice. Yuck.

            Plus, he’s such an utter prick with crap acting skills.

          11. Presque Vu says:

            Lisk I don’t think it’s HG, I know it’s not but for some reason just the way Matt delivered, the vocabulary, the nuances, the obvious education.. I thought of HG. I find Matt not displeasing, I like him, I don’t think he’s a narc but what do I know!

          12. Cat says:

            “If he is a narcissist, he believes the lies and therefore the supposed indicator of lying is inapplicable.”

            Thought about your explanation of narcs smiling, HG. Scientific papers all filled with description of the Fake Smile (lacking crows feet around the eyes) are of no use to the reader.

            Because the narcissist looks very happy smiling from ear to ear with crows feet and the bag of chips too! They really believe they are happy, but as you disclosed to us, HG, it’s only a demonstration of fuelling. The narc not being aware himself.

          13. HG Tudor says:


          14. Violetta says:

            The vowels are similar, but Hancock sounds a lyric baritone on his top notes and HG doesn’t go that high, at least in speaking. Also, HG’s chest notes are significantly lower than Hancock goes, at at least in the YT interview I heard.

          15. alexissmith2016 says:

            Thanks PV. Yes there is perhaps a scale of deadness in the eyes of Ns. I’ve not quite worked out what that means yet as some Ns have very natural looking eyes and yet can be evil bastards.

            Sadly I’m pretty sure Matt is another N though

          16. Foreigner74 says:

            H.G. , you said that if “he is a narcissist, he believes the lies and therefore the supposed indicator of lying is inapplicable”. Does that mean Narcissists always think they’re telling the truth? Or do they sometimes just feel entitled to lie and is that why they don’t show any recognizable signs of discomfort when lying ? Thank you

          17. HG Tudor says:

            Lesser or Mid-Range believe the lie. Greater do not, but do not care. If you wish to understand why this happens and how it works, please arrange a consultation and I shall explain this is detail to you, to aid your understanding F74.

          18. WokeAF says:

            K – HG confirmed my babydaddy as a LMR victim. He’s a Trump fan even in 🇨🇦 here.
            He finally admitted there’s a virus but doesn’t believe mainstream media, nor does he believe anything on the internet – his son caught him out on that last night – asking what source WOULD he believe -we were dos issuing the tiger that contracted it from its handler in the NY ZOO-and ignited his fury a bit when it was pointed out -that basically he doesn’t defer to any authority at all besides his own. He DOES go along with Trump in general though…but he thinks maybe the tiger thing is connected to the Tiger King documentary to scare ppl
            NO authority is listened to unless it accords with his own opinion at that time.

          19. K says:

            Based on your comments, he is definitely a LMRN victim. LMRNs can’t control their fury as well as MMRNs. Many of my lessers believe in conspiracy theories and discount the scientific evidence re: Covid-19. I have been informed, by a lesser, that the Chinese created the virus to kill Americans and destroy the economy so they can rule the world.

            It’s always fun in NarcLand.

    2. Kiki says:

      This is NOT funny seriously.

    3. Lorelei says:

      Alexis, I can’t reply up above but yes, she is a swamp creature and I’m not taking it back because someone says I am mean. I knew I was right about her. He hates drinking but she’s drunk all over the place and he had to have her baptized. (long story) He is a fucking idiot and even knew some Jesus was needed to control her and maintain his facade. I’ve never seen something like this. She trespassed onto a property and assaulted someone and is on probation. The person was able to secure a restraining order. I would never have photos of myself online pictured with porn looking women with boobs the size of the Goodyear blimp. I am not making this up. It is real. I was really embarrassed at first, but now I am amused and I hope he takes her to every event. She told my daughter last night that she had shin splints and needs treatment. I get a text from my daughter and I told her no one gives a damn about a shin splint during a pandemic and she can take Tylenol and quit whining. Like she is even qualified to assess a tibia. She is more qualified to decorate a porn set for ambiance.

  18. Violetta says:

    Comic relief alert:

    Gwyneth Paltrow is complaining on DM about the lack of privacy in her mansion, attributing to it a reduction in Lurve.

    This ignores at least two facts:

    1. People crammed into 5th-floor walk-ups manage it somehow; and

    2. Gwynnie’s makeup-less picture, which shows very little return for all the health-n-beauty rituals she advocates.

    Best reader reaction:
    “That’s it the torture is complete I will do what ever you wish but please dont bore me with that Paltrow woman again”

    On rare occasions, Narcissism is fun.

    1. lisk says:

      “which shows very little return for all the health-n-beauty rituals she advocates.”

      Great line.

      I’m so bummed I have this project to complete. It’s so fun in here today!

      1. Violetta says:


        I envy you: you’re needed somewhere. I can survive for a few months without my tapping into my presently pathetic rollovers (or asking help from family members), but I took a kind of narcy pride in knowing that MY students would learn proper citation, essay structure, and grammar even if F.U.’s Golden Staff met deadlines by putting three comments on a five-page research essay (two of the three being, “Not APA.,” with no mention of what was wrong or how to fix it).

        Blood banks are recruiting for serum donations, so I’m going to call, tell them I think I had the mild form, ask if they can use me, and if so, when can I come in. If they find the antibodies, I can feel happy on two fronts:

        1. I shall have served some purpose; and
        2. If I’ve already had it, I won’t have to worry so much about getting it. If I do get a mutated form later, it is likely to be even milder, since I’d have at least partial immunity.

        Watching the news is a ruddy nightmare. I should probably stop watching TV news and stop reading it online, especially New York stories. The people I’m in touch with seem to be OK so far, but I did two shows in Bensonhurst, used to shop under the El in Jackson Heights, hit the beach at Rockaway, etc. If it’s possible to suffer geographical pain along with survivor guilt, that’s how it feels. Went through something similar after 9/11: I’m no better than the people who didn’t survive, how dare you attack MY city, and sheer rage at the fact that this couldn’t be solved by slugging somebody.

    2. Lorelei says:

      Is Gwyneth a narcissist? Please let it stop, can’t some normal people exist. Is she? I know Tom Hanks is normal, I know this for sure.

      1. Violetta says:

        I don’t know if HG has commented on her, but her Goop routine seems pretty narcy to me. Vaginal steaming and Jade eggs, referring to a breakup as “Consciously Uncoupling,” giving people quack advice that doctors say could be dangerous as well as expensive and useless. She’s not a conscious con artist; sincerely thinks she’s a wonderful influence. The lack of empathy for people in lower socioeconomic groups has always been amazing, and she doesn’t even try to disguise it. It all sounds pretty Mid-rAngel to me.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          She is a narcissist.

          1. Lorelei says:

            God dammit. Is everyone just a horrible person? I just have one more. Jennifer Aniston. I’m asking to keep up on Brad’s number of ensnarements.

          2. WokeAF says:

            MMR type A or UMR?

          3. Lorelei says:

            I think Gwyneth is really cute. I’d sleep with her even if she’s not a human and I’m not gay. She has a sun kissed look and I like her hair.

          4. HG Tudor says:

            She’s rotten to the core

          5. Lorelei says:

            I think it was Violetta that commented about her website. I was really not aware she was so fixated on matters of sensuality and found her site (upon looking today) to be obvious. The basic education on sex she provides is haughty—it’s nothing new and she’s not bright enough to know it’s not interesting. She also is grandiose enough to promote sex toys, which seems an unusual choice as a mother with children of a tender age in the public eye. I would think of my kids being appalled immediately. ** Having adult children and being in her position may generate a better boundary. I know I am an idiot here per se, but don’t think I’m ever talking about nonsense to my children. I had no idea she believed herself to be an expert on such matters.

          6. Cat says:

            A very pretty N then. Id est Brad has been engaged to 3 different narcs? I think the world has judged him too harshly for the breakups indeed.

          7. HG Tudor says:

            It has

          8. MommyPino says:

            HG, Have you seen the video of Michael Bublé elbowing his wife then pulling her back to him like she’s a rag doll? His beautiful wife’s facial expression there was pretty disturbing as her eyes looked sad even though she tried to hide it with a smile. I have no doubt that he’s a MR.

            Also HG, what do you think is Bruce Willis? Is he a narc or an empath addicted to narcissist Demi Moore? I thought it was so weird that he left his wife and young kids to be quarantined with Demi Moore and their grown kids. His wife looks like a total sweet girl empath just looking at her pictures.

          9. HG Tudor says:

            Yes I have seen it.

            I have not analysed Bruce.

          10. Violetta says:

            Classic comments about Gwynnie from a celebrity gossip site:

            “I feel sorry for her steamed vagina. I’m sure it’s very confused.”

            “would someone be able to sue Paltrow because they burned their dick on one of her vagina candles? asking for a friend”

          11. Violetta says:


            I’ve read things like 1963 fashion magazines and trashy Victorian novels to get into the head of a character, and sometimes I do it just for fun. I’ve sat in the library looking at ’50s Mademoiselles, 19-teens Town and Countries, trying to figure out what it is like to feel embedded in that world. Sometimes, I’ll look at an ad for an 85-year old lipstick and think, “I want that.”

            Gwyneth is straight up ’70s Cosmo. Her whole-grain “health” advice, her assumption that the sex revolution is still necessary in order to fight all that ’50s repression, the triumphant announcement that “we can talk about these things now!” (I can barely remember a time in my life when people weren’t talking about it), etc. Meghan Markle is the same way: they acquire the traits of 2nd-wave Feminists without ever having lived through any of the oppression they rail against.

            My parents had a novel called A Year in the Life of Marin County, which was made into a movie called Serial. Per Wikipedia, it covered the overlap between the counterculture and the Yuppies:

            est, the Fischer-Hoffman Process, and Jonathan Livingston Seagull; radical feminism and Sierra Club membership …. kids are sent to free-form summer camps offering survival training and “spontaneous rap sessions”

            It had details like “creative divorce”–sound like Conscious Uncoupling to you?

            All about living an Authentic life–for people who can afford it.

          12. Lorelei says:

            Violetta—interesting observation you make about acquiring the traits. Her site wasn’t original and the “education” elementary. The g spot discussion is a copy cat. I just didn’t know she was into all that. The sex toy thing unnecessary as she has nothing on Lelo. It was grandiose and I don’t want to know what sex toys she likes.

          13. lisk says:

            I don’t see the Cosmo in GOOP at all. She seems more like the original Our Bodies, Ourselves.

          14. Kensey says:

            …probably rolls her own tampons.

        2. Intrepid Traveller says:

          Doesn’t ‘conscious uncoupling’ equal ‘I control the divorce’?

          1. HG Tudor says:

            Yes allied with pretentious horseshit

          2. Bibi says:

            HG, I love that you say Gwyneth is rotten to the core. I want to punch her in the face. Such a pretentious twat.

          3. lisk says:

            Plus, I can’t see the attraction.

            She’s not someone who I’d notice walking down the street.

          4. Violetta says:

            But it’s a pretentious twat that’s perky from herbal steam cleanings and squooshing Jade eggs!

            Maybe she did do Harvey to get Shakespeare in Love. I’d want a steam-cleaning or 20 myself after that. Erg.

          5. Bibi says:

            And Gwyneth is now auctioning off one of her Oscar dresses–to help with Covid. OMG and it is of great sentimental value to her!!!! Who wouldn’t want it???


            As for Oprah, she has done tremendous damage to the culture with her exploitation and charlatans. Her dumbed down book club, her magazine with her on every single cover. Even Martha Stewart doesn’t do that. Oprah is all about shallowness, materialism, image, me me me, but I am a good person, don’t you see?

            Do you remember when she complained in France that she was not let into some store b/c it was after hours but then she did the racism victim. Poor me, the billionaire. She has crashed people’s weddings b/c who wouldn’t want her there? Duh! Then she is shocked when the wedding party tells her to leave. Sense of entitlement and grandiosity.

            She is so insecure and needing to be liked. Her 50th b-day bash that was ostentatious crap for 2 days. How dare anyone not agree with her–she doesn’t bring anyone on her show who disagrees with her. It’s all an Oprah love fest.

            Even if you could say her intent is in the right place, that she means well, she is so fake and phony and with great power and influence comes responsibility. You don’t recommend garbage like ‘The Secret’ when you have that much sway. Literally, people in the media were terrified of offending her b/c she has so much power and could ruin you if she chose.

            Has she done some good? Sure. But she has done a ton of damage–she is so out of touch with the working person, but then she pretends like she ‘gets it.’ Gwyneth doesn’t pretend to be in touch with the working person–she is at least obvious with her elitism.

            Anyway, on and on. I can’t overlook her sanctimony. I am glad to be able to type these comments and not be called names on account of it. Literally, there was a time 15 yrs ago where if you said anything bad about this woman, you were then a bad person.

          6. WhoCares says:

            Bibi – “You don’t recommend garbage like ‘The Secret’ when you have that much sway.” This made me laugh.

            I think original Oprah (when I had cable and could still stomach the occasional daytime show) when she was just starting her talk show was more relatable and authentic.

          7. thank you for your honest and open analysis of Oprah Bibi. I appreciate that. It’s certainly given me food for thought. I shall need to start observing her a little more. Other than the odd chatshow I don’t know much of her. I have only ever seen her pre knowledge where to me she appeared warm and friendly.Of course lots of empathic people have strong N traits but I shall definitely take a closer look.

        3. theletterafterj says:

          Vaginal steaming WTF?!?!

          1. Violetta says:

            As numerous gynecologists have noted, the vagina is a self-cleaning oven. There is generally no need to do anything to it beyond regular showers/baths and wearing clean underwear.

            Anything that can’t be treated by adding yogurt, buttermilk, or some other form of acidophilus to the diet should be referred to a physician. All Gwynnie’s nutty ideas will achieve are messing up the pH balance and possibly causing an infection.

      2. How do you know Tom Hanks is normal Lorelei?

        1. Lorelei says:

          Alexis—something about his energy doesn’t feel deviated from a normal person. He reminds me of a normal male friend I have.

          1. alexissmith2016 says:

            Thanks re Tom, I’ll have to take a closer look and see

          2. WokeAF says:

            Lorelei that was the closest anyone has come here to verbalizing how things are for me
            You can FEEL it. it’s so true

        2. Lorelei says:

          Alexis—I bet you are fun when you are drinking. That was kinda cute last night!

          1. alexissmith2016 says:

            Awww thanks Lorelei! Well I was definitely having a good time hahahah

        3. lisk says:

          I see narc in Tom’s eyes, and I think it transferred to his son.

      3. Chihuahuamum says:

        Surprised at gwyneth being a narcissist. I always liked her. She seems empathetic and cares about people and the world.

        1. HG Tudor says:


      4. Cat says:

        Gonna agree with you here Lorelei. Tom’s wife Rita looks relaxed, calm and herself. Victims of narc abuse look more tense, or very very quiet.

        1. Awww I hope so. that’s a lovely thought

          1. Cat says:

            Thanks Alexis
            But yeah I understand you wondering. Tom Hanks is known for the outlandish odd faces he makes in films. Cute, but what planet is he from really? But he has never cared about looking the absolute sexiest, imo. Cool.

            And there Are some really really rich Nonnarcs out there. Like Oprah. I believe Kenny Rogers was an empath. And Sting is. And Jon Bon Jovi. Some empaths/normals are simply very good with money, no doubt. I’m hoping Tom is one of them.

          2. That is great! I knew Oprah and Brad. Didn’t know the other empaths! bloody fantastic! I hope Tom is too

          3. HG Tudor says:

            Sting? Ha ha haha

          4. Oh damn! Another of yours

          5. Lorelei says:

            Alexis—it makes sense. The need to be seen and given attention.

          6. WokeAF says:

            Kenny Rogers? Looking at his relationship history (didn’t he marry a 20 something in his 60’s? I’d guess he’s a narc

          7. Just watched the first episode of ‘Quiz’, for anyone who hasn’t watched it yet, it’s about the British army major who cheated to win, ‘who wants to be a millionaire’. In the drama they portray the wife as the one who pushes her reluctant husband onto the programme. But I’ve just googled rl photos of them and Charles Ingram has greedy little eyes which makes me think he’s the narc, if the brother of Diana was portrayed accurately (not looked him up yet) he has to be a desperate narc too. What about Diana HG? I have no feeling for her either way with regards to her photos.

          8. Cat says:

            Is Sting a narc, HG??
            He seemed fantastic back when he held a long seemingly thoughtful concert, transformed and replanned the day after 9/11.

            Genuinely had me fooled.

          9. autiempath says:


            that is the good old façade.

            I remember a post here on Narcside about the song, every breath you take.
            The song is about a stalker.

            Then the song Roxanne, ugh.
            And his eyes! Brrrr dead eyes.

          10. lisk says:

            I suspect “narc” wherever “seemingly thoughtful concerts” are held.

            LiveAid was a narcfest.

          11. HG Tudor says:


          12. I think also you missed Lorraine Kelly off the empath list wahoo!

          13. Bibi says:

            Oprah is rotten.

          14. alexissmith2016 says:

            Awww no Bibi, Oprah is an empath. HG has given his official seal of approval. What makes you think she is rotten?

          15. lisk says:

            He did???

            I’m with Bibi.

          16. Cat says:

            HG says Oprah is “Team Empath”. Relief because I always liked her. I like Dr Phil too, even though he can be a bit 1950s on his views on women sometimes.

          17. NarcAngel says:

            Lots of people don’t like Oprah but I believe she is an empath. Empaths are not saints. I thought early on the Dr. Phil might be a normal (not having much reference for those) but over time have arrived at MRN. I no longer wonder how he could resist my pleas/attempts to have HG as a guest haha.

          18. WhoCares says:

            Haha – NA: “I no longer wonder how he could resist my pleas/attempts to have HG as a guest haha.”

            I agree with you in thinking Dr. Phil is a narcissist. I am unsure of school.
            However, I absolutely cannot stand the sound and tone of his voice – soooo, I’ll go with MRN too!

            (Re: the sound of his voice…could be because my mother would always have her television on during the day, in the background, and most daytime TV makes me ill to my stomach…Dr. Phil’s voice makes me extra cringey.)

          19. Cat says:

            Yeah some salesmen and media people seem to think that pulling a strong rural or southern accent is an argument itself, for having made a correct analysis or for being honest.

          20. WhoCares says:



            “pulling a strong rural or southern accent is an argument itself, for having made a correct analysis or for being honest.”

            I actually had not considered his accent or even stereotypes surrounding it. I don’t hear people in real life often with such an accent – only in movies, in media and otherwise. To my (Canadian) mind a rural or southern accent suggests hospitality or the quality of being “down to earth”. I always thought a British accent (dependent on region of origin), stereotypically, is thought to convey a correct analysis or the quality of being authoritative.

          21. Cat says:

            Ah I see what you mean WhoCares. I mean the other way around I guess.
            When a salesman wants to sound convincing he usually pulls the rural nextdoor “I’m just a simple guy” to underline his own honesty or that he is truly convinced that this is the truth of the matter.

            I don’t know about Dr Phil and Oprah, but her collaboration with Eckhart Tolle is way more risky imo.

          22. WokeAF says:

            Interesting you mention that (Eckhart Tolle & Oprah). I’ve thought about that myself. Can you elaborate Cat

          23. Cat says:

            @WokeAF I guess I know less about Tolle than you, to be frank,
            but selfhelpgurus with a lot of abstract, nonconrete blanket statements
            “The power of now”
            “the separation of thinking and awareness”
            will ime only make ppl stuck, buying more and more books, hand out a lot of cash, trying to investigate what he means. Usually doesn’t do good.

          24. WokeAF says:

            Depends on what the true desire of the buyer is.
            It’s true you don’t need a library to find Truth. A handbook from the right person might nudge you though. You might like Sailor Bob Adamson, hes much more Frank. You can find him and other podcasts on Some really good stuff there and free. 😉

            Old Tolle before the Oprah machine was much more fun for me . He’s so beige. LOL I love him tho. Little elf. I adore his little wooly sweaters
            I met him New Year’s Eve of 2012
            He came to rent a video in the store I worked at , (he has a house on my island in BC) — really late at night. Guess he thought he’d escape being seen but my stupid satanist narc coworker called him out. It was amusing . Coworker was saying “ I’d love to have coffee and pick your brain” and Eckhart was all “oh yes, mmm yess we’ll do coffee..” without a hint of sarcasm but boy he couldn’t wait to get going . New Year’s Eve video renting on a tiny island, ffs poor fucker can’t go anywhere

            Absolute Truth is easy to mimic for the guru-narc. (Osho, for example. Or Charlie Manson) They catch a glimpse – then ego co-opts the enlightenment and makes it part of Itself.
            Conceptually correct, but not experientially , or abidingly being LIVED.

            I didn’t like the Oprah train and I was a little surprised he got on it. I suspect he was a little surprised himself LOL
            She reminds me of ppl who decorate themselves and homes with drums, smudge and rose quartz but don’t mind tearing out the asshole of a slow cashier.

          25. WokeAF says:

            Ooooop! Correction ;


          26. Cat says:

            I guess he could be a narc. I liked a short news interview I saw though. On Youtube, called Baiters. “Beware of baiters” It was about narcissists but he didn’t use that word.

          27. lisk says:

            I can’t see it, honestly.

            I quit her show in the mid-90s because of so much “I” in her language and actions.

            Maybe I should focus on her body instead. She’s beaten it up so much, internalizing lots of abuse I guess. She tries to get control but can’t.

            I don’t know. HG, do you talk about narcissism and obesity/eating disorders anywhere?

          28. HG Tudor says:

            Not specifically, they are linked to control in a number of ways.

          29. lisk says:

            I do like Dr. Phil.

          30. alexissmith2016 says:

            He did. @K do you recall where at all?

            I’m very interested to learn what makes you think Oprah is an N Lisk? I hope my comment does not come across as antagonistic in any way. Sometimes it’s tricky to convey tone in written format. I’m just genuinely interested in how people perceive others and why.

          31. theletterafterj says:

            Here it is alexissmith2016!

            HG Tudor says:
            September 22, 2017 at 16:09
            Oprah is in Team Empath.


          32. alexissmith2016 says:

            Thank you k

          33. theletterafterj says:

            My pleasure alexissmith2016!

          34. lisk says:


            Everything is about Oprah.

            Oprah. Oprah. Oprah.

            Everybody’s pain, everybody’s success, everybody’s everything.

            She turns every You into I, I , I, I, Me, Me, Me, Me, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah.

            I find her so-called empathy disingenuous and totally unhelpful—as well as dangerous, helping to create a culture of victimhood and blaming that she has used to exploit in order to maintain her Empathy Empire.

            I much prefer the open narcissist, HG, who gives practical, useful advice that advocates ultimate self-responsibility without pretending that he’s doing it for anyone other than himself.

            (I imagine this is the honest, truth-seeker in me speaking here.)

          35. alexissmith2016 says:

            You’ve got a good point Lisk and she does talk about herself alot. I just listened to an interview (Oprah being interviewed) so I guess that was a tad biassed because she would be expected to talk about herself then. I guess though it could also be her N trait of pride which prompts her to talk about herself and some people do get anxious and talk about themselves alot too. That said I’m also aware that Ns love, love, love to talk about themselves – it’s a given. I suppose not all Es will be good listeners and not all Ns will talk about themselves. One N I engage with likes to let me talk about me alot and I don’t mind hahah.

            Honestly speaking, pre knowledge I would have said she was a kind person. POst knowledge if HG had not said she was an E I too would have questioned what she is and probably unable to draw any firm conclusion. It’s difficult to know whether this is confirmation bias and I see her empathic traits purely because HG has said she is an empath.

          36. HG Tudor says:

            I have met her, she is an empath.

          37. alexissmith2016 says:

            Yay! I didn’t disbelieve you. Just trying to convey that it is not always that easy because some people have very strong N traits which manifest in different ways. I find it especially hard with celebs. I need that interaction. I need to feel the silent treatments and the word salads and all other manipulations first hand. Even as a NISS with an elongated GP you can still feel them, albeit more subtle than if you are an IP (except the total bitch ass females!) but it’s there. I struggle when simply observing people so am completely reliant on your information unless they do some glaringly obvious things such as Trump. Thank you though. I’m naturally extremely grateful to you for affirming and that she actually is one. I will love her forever on that basis alone!

          38. HG Tudor says:

            Oh I know you did not disbelieve me AS2016, I added this to assist you in overcoming your indecision which is understandable based on the points made.

          39. Lorelei says:

            Alexis—it’s evening for you. Are you drunk yet?

          40. alexissmith2016 says:

            hahaha no I’m not drunk. Friday night drinker here, despite HG’s smearing of me being an alchy

          41. HG Tudor says:

            Pah, the evidence speaks for itself you lush!

          42. alexissmith2016 says:


          43. Sorry crashed out on the sofa! Like I was saying, gin is the fruit of the land, you can drink it with tonic, you can drink it with wine, you can drink it with campari, you can cocktail it, there’s pinapple gin, coccunt gin, lemon gin you can add it to your salad, your deserts, you can have gin soup, gin crumble, gin gumbo, you can down a shot or as I prefer to do, down a bottle..or three! that’s about it.

            HG am I a good whore or a bad whore?

          44. HG Tudor says:

            You’re a pickled whore

          45. alexissmith2016 says:

            I’ll take that as a good one then

          46. Lorelei says:

            A good whore gets fucked just like a bad whore so who cares Alexis!!

          47. NarcAngel says:


            I don’t think you’re a whore at all but you brought up coccunt gin. Typo, wishful thinking, or Freudian slip?

          48. alexissmith2016 says:

            Hahahah thanks NA I’m just going with HGs definition. All women are good whores or bad whores unless they’re a madonnna. Good whore does what he wants bad whore doesn’t. Yup Freudian slip lol

          49. Lorelei says:

            I am drinking this evening! I gave raspberry vodka & flavored sparkling water.

          50. oooh that sounds delicious Lorelei! I wish I was there x

          51. Lorelei says:

            Alexis—also it’s props to be a bad whore, it’s hair pulling!

          52. alexissmith2016 says:

            I can do hair pulling hahaha

            I’m was just going with Hg’s definition. All women are good whores or bad whores unless they’re a madonnna. Good whore does what he wants bad whore doesn’t.

          53. Lorelei says:

            I’ll do anything Alexis.
            Bad or good. I’m
            Having a COVID party.

          54. alexissmith2016 says:

            hahaha an Ns dream then nightmare hey!

            A covid party sounds interesting. I turned Tuesday into the new Friday. WHo even knows what day it is under lockdown.

          55. Lorelei says:

            I can’t keep mirroring your boozing Alexis. I’ve turned over a new leaf. My new hobby is weed control. I’m excited to use some weed & feed on my garden hose nozzle. I just bought it. I also bought lily bulbs & more baby trees. My daughter video taped me dancing last night and I would almost rather have a sex tape circulating on TMZ. Truthfully though, the fact that me being drunk as an event is a testament to having improved substantially. I used to put alcohol in coffee cups.

          56. alexissmith2016 says:

            Well according to HG most people can’t hahah oooh nooo the video tape sounds fun! can you send that to me via HG too please ahahahaha Blimey alcohol in coffee cups! jUst yours or other people’s too lol. Could brighten up a church coffee event!

          57. Lorelei says:

            Indeed, I was dancing to “She know” by NeYo and Juicy! Haha

          58. Lorelei says:

            Omg. I am confused about which whore gets what! Are you bad or good if you get spanked Alexis? I’m not sure of the algorithm on this. Would a Madonna figure ever get a little smack on the ass? Would a Madonna figure want a smack on the ass? Or, is the Madonna figure more pristine? Would being spanked or wanting spanked cause a loss of status by becoming a bad whore?

          59. alexissmith2016 says:

            I imagine, though I’m no expert that if you liked spanking and you were a good whore you would get it. If you liked spanking and were a bad whore you wouldn’t get it.

            If you didn’t like it and a good whore you wouldn’t get it and as a bad whore you would.

            If my understanding of a Madonna is correct they would be sexually unappealing to the narc either because they are sexually unappealing full stop or because they have become stale.

            I think I fluctuate between being good whore bad whore a lot! perhaps a madonna to some. I can’t imagine too many though hahahah

          60. Lorelei says:

            Let’s do a flow chart on good whore/bad whore with a paddle depicted at the top. A thinking tree of sorts. A visual aid and have HG add to the knowledge vault. I will never have my ass paddled. I want to be the paddler. So, should I tell my new candidate intimate partner primary source? Or wait until they are ensnared? Truthfully though—I think I’ve already got my hooks set and the infection is percolating.

          61. alexissmith2016 says:

            A flow chart sounds good ahahah – love it! I reckon we could definitely charge commission for this.

            I think you’re the sort of person who could tell them up front or wait until they’re ensnared. I’d say they’d be up for pleasing you at any stage of the seduction.

            I hope you don’t have the infection. Make sure you look after yourself.

          62. Lorelei says:

            I think we are both getting an infection. A robustly intelligent individual that is interestingly enough, not a space alien. Smarter than I’ll ever be for sure, this attracts me.
            I’ll design the algorithm and send to HG. I’ll use your thoughts as the design model. COVID has me bored stiff. Until we get a true surge (if we do) I’m doing some work remotely. Will HG send to you if I make it? I think it’s a fun little exercise.

          63. alexissmith2016 says:

            haha great! I’ll look forward to that Lorelei

          64. WokeAF says:

            “..and I’m no expert” 😆
            That was actually totally coherent and correct Alexis, well done.
            My MMR (DLS) was once trying to make me bad whore who didn’t want it but got it —but it turned out I did want it! . So then I was bad whore who didn’t get it.

            Lmfao you two . Also the day of the week is a Defin a thing of the past.

          65. alexissmith2016 says:

            hahaha you bad, bad whore WAF

          66. Lorelei says:

            Do we need to spank Woke and teach her a lesson!

          67. alexissmith2016 says:

            Depends whether she likes or not?

          68. WokeAF says:

            Only from narcs LOL

          69. Lorelei says:

            When someone is that successful it makes us wonder Alexis. Oprah is truly committed to creating a sense of community for the girls in her school which is nice to know.

          70. alexissmith2016 says:

            Of course, I am dubious of them all and always impressed when an empath makes it! Although makes me sad they then become prey to so many Ns.
            Brad Pitt springs to mind. Now I’m wondereing re AJ and her being a greater. I wonder what it would be like in a house where there is a greater parent and greater child. How would that dynamic play out?

          71. Lorelei says:

            Did HG say she’s a greater? (AJ)
            I thought she has psychopathy but not necessarily self aware..

          72. alexissmith2016 says:

            I believe so. @k ?

          73. theletterafterj says:

            Here it is. There’s nothing on this thread that indicates that AJ is a Greater.

            HG Tudor says:
            January 9, 2020 at 08:45
            The upper hand in children proceedings is just another manifestation of control.

            Jolie is a narcissistic psychopath.

            Lorelei says:
            January 9, 2020 at 10:46
            She thinks you’ve implied Jolie is self aware? Is this what you implied?

            HG Tudor says:
            January 9, 2020 at 12:57
            You will have to wait and see when she is put under the Tudorscope.


          74. Lorelei says:

            Thanks for finding this K. I imagine life with AJ was difficult. Brad blew up on the plane and she was able to make it appear that he was a problem, when in fact, he was reacting to her passive aggressive bullshit no doubt. She was able to make him out to appear aggressive and manipulate the kids into “how scary daddy is.”Vultures until the last bite. If I recall she triangulated the children further by having the oldest come to rescue against Brad on the flight.

          75. K says:

            My pleasure Lorelei!

          76. alexissmith2016 says:

            Ah that’s brilliant! thank you K!

            Apologies for being the provider of misinformation Lorelei – well remembered!

            I guess yes. What do you think?

          77. Lorelei says:

            Psychopath or not—Jolie needs a triple cheeseburger.

          78. K says:

            My pleasure alexissmith2016!

          79. WokeAF says:

            Oh right on!
            Thanks K . I must’ve misunderstood or…I dunno

            I’m gonna guess Middle Greater myself tho!

          80. theletterafterj says:

            My pleasure WokeAF!

          81. WokeAF says:

            HG, is AJ a middle greater and is she self aware

          82. MommyPino says:

            WokeAF, That doesn’t make someone a Narc. My husband and I have a 28 yr age gap and he’s the most wonderful and authentic person I have ever met. He always has my back. No shifting sands. No silent treatments. HG has never said that a big age gap makes one automatically a narc. I don’t know enough about Kenny Rogers though.

          83. alexissmith2016 says:

            so I’ve started watching the documentary re Diana and Charles Ingram. It does seem Diana is a narc. She has some degree of calculation although fails to execute it well so I presume an UMR If she’s a greater, she’s shit at it and needs to be sacked! She struggles to cover up her irritance with her husband so perhaps a cerebral mid. possibly elite. she’s intelligent but lacks control. (I have more to watch, much more) Charles is such a dimwit its hard to say. I would imagine he’s not too dissimilar to Prince Andrew.

          84. K says:

            Did you miss this sentence?

            “Prince Harry is an empathic individual. He has inherited Princess Diana’s caring and empathic traits.”


          85. alexissmith2016 says:

            ah no I love, love, love Prince Harry. Yes HG, it is Friday and I have been drinking again! tusk tusk! This is a different diana and charles

          86. theletterafterj says:

            Hahahaha…it’s not your fault at all; I misread your comment.

          87. K says:

            Oops, my bad! Wrong Charles and Diana. Sorry about that alexissmith2016!

          88. alexissmith2016 says:

            Ah no please don’t apologise. Nothing to apologise for. If there is one thing I’ve learned from HG and the other Ns of the world it’s not to apologise , well unless I really have to of course 😂😂

          89. Violetta says:

            Alexis: at least Jolie can bloody act. I’m not saying talent excuses John Lennon’s wife-beating and kiddie-bashing or Steve Jobs’ treatment of his high school girlfriend and their daughter, but they made some contribution to the universe.

            The thing I find so annoying about Meghan Markle and Gwyneth Paltrow is they are mediocre at best. If they were as passionately incompetent as Tommy Wiseau or Ed Wood there might be a kind of clueless charm to it all, but they don’t even have that. They can offer neither expertise nor enthusiasm.

          90. alexissmith2016 says:

            Hahhaa you’re incredibly worldly wise violetta

          91. Violetta says:

            Only when I’m not in the situation myself. I have perspective whatever on the people I interact with.

          92. Lorelei says:

            Alexis, I think it is getting pretty boring with all the shut downs. Can we youtube how to steam our vaginas?

          93. steaming as we speak

          94. Lorelei says:

            I think we are all just resorting to desperate measures for entertainment. My daughter and her friend tried to bathe the cat yesterday. The shower curtain rod fell and they were unsure why it was such a disaster. I went off—“You don’t bathe cats—are you stupid!?” The highlight of my day is that I get my very own N100 mask I get to pick up. It’s so exciting. Maybe I’ll be more safely spat upon.

          95. I finally got the hoover I wanted yesterday. Had to wait that one out! Hasn’t particularly helped me understand him in lockdown though. Hopefully the book will enlighten…

          96. Lorelei says:

            I’m glad Alexis! I have some work to do at home. I’m hesitantly wanting to look into taking the kids to some Ontario haunts I’ve not visited in years, maybe end of July.. I have lots of time to assemble my plans. I’m prepping a Mexican ensemble to devour at this moment.

          97. alexissmith2016 says:

            oooh I love mexican! sounds delicious lorelei. You sound like such a good mum!

        2. Lorelei says:

          Cat—did HG confirm Jennifer A as also a narc? I can’t see the comments but thought you were talking on this matter.

          1. K says:

            I couldn’t find confirmation of JA’s personality.

          2. Lorelei says:

            My curiosity rests with not only the confirmation but why? Why? Because she has many indicators: Recent divorce, success, (although her foot was in the door from daddy)—she wrote her mother off at one time just like Angelina had with her dad, Brad was attracted to her, she does the “good girl” image quite well. But—what if she was setting boundaries to what sounded absolutely a narc mother, success because she got lucky (Friends was genius at the time), blah blah. It helps pull together other views of people. That is why we ask. Alexis made a recent inquiry as well re, someone and I assume for similar reasons. My bet is on yes. If HG confirms with an associated view/brief explanation of why I’ll make a small donation to the angel fund.

          3. Cat says:

            He did indeed. Jen really had me fooled. Thought she was a sincere kind person. Brad’s been engaged to 3 narcs. Man.

          4. HG has definitely confirmed JA is an N. Not sure where on the blog but she’s 100% N

          5. K says:

            If you find it, please, let me know!

          6. Of course K

          7. theletterafterj says:

            Thank you alexissmith2016!

          8. E&L says:

            February 11, 2020 / Last updated : February 11, 2020 HG Tudor
            Johnny Depp v Amber Heard – Telephone Call Analysis

            I looked up BRAD THREE N…go figure. K taught me well!

  19. MB says:

    I’ve read several articles regarding the increase in emergency calls around the world due to domestic violence since stay at home orders have been put in place. Being familiar with HG’s work and having read this piece in particular, it’s no surprise at all. Narcissists are relying heavily on those in their household for fuel needs. I’d like to see some statistics on how many Golden Periods end during this pandemic. Stale fuel for breakfast, lunch, AND dinner, YUM!!

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Valid observation.

    2. It’s really worrying MB. I’m extremely fortunate in every which way during lockdown. A tad bored but getting used to the new way of life. I can’t help but think of all those poor individuals stuck inside with a narc and violent or non-violent and how horrific this must be. My heart absolutely goes out to them all.

      1. WhoCares says:


        “I can’t help but think of all those poor individuals stuck inside with a narc and violent or non-violent and how horrific this must be. My heart absolutely goes out to them all.”


        Every time a winter passes (since I left the formal relationship) I think: thank goodness *this* wasn’t the year I was stuck with my narcissist…but THIS year? This one tops them all – it would have been horrifically challenging. Or just plain horrific.

        1. alexissmith2016 says:

          I’m glad you got out Whocares! Bloody well done! Here’s to a narc free lockdown xx Well…almost…xxx

          1. WhoCares says:


        2. Caity says:


          “Every time a winter passes (since I left the formal relationship) I think: thank goodness *this* wasn’t the year I was stuck with my narcissist…but THIS year? This one tops them all – it would have been horrifically challenging. Or just plain horrific”

          I do not think it is possible to agree with you more! Part of me feels sorry for his ex (now his current) because she is the recipient of his nastiness, but mostly, I’m so tremendously grateful it’s not *me*!!!

          1. WhoCares says:


            I agree with you on the sense of gratefulness for not being in relationship with the narcissist at this particular time – and the concern for his current IPPS…that is partly why I shared HG’s work with a friend who works at a women’s shelter and who has contact with many in domestic abuse situations. This would be an excellent time to share HG’s work with others in similar social services – if they’re not overwhelmed by Covid19 worries, they may actually be quite receptive. And then maybe some IPPS’s elsewhere could be helped.

      2. Lorelei says:

        I’m bored as I can be Alexis. I went out to buy some bulbs to plant just to get out, although I need a few weeks before planting them—I can’t have them bloom before the first week of May due to frost. This sucks.

        1. MB says:

          Is buying bulbs essential Lorelei? I don’t remember seeing that.

          1. Lorelei says:

            It is. I have my dirt and pebbles too. You have to put pebbles in your pots at the bottom for drainage, and drill holes in your pots too. I can teach you. I have extra mulch as well. The bulbs will be planted in 2 weeks. I’ll cover with a thin layer of black mulch. Sprouting will follow and I will use fertilizer to influence the blooms. Miracle grow works fine, even store brands. The breakdown of nutrients is the key to look at. I know things about things.

          2. MB says:

            Lorelei, HG is not going to allow much more of this landscaping talk. He may have to revise the rules just for you!

          3. HG Tudor says:

            Yes, I may have to do some pruning. Mind you I do enjoy planting or more accurately, burying.

          4. MB says:

            I thought you were more of a cremation type of guy!

          5. HG Tudor says:

            That is for the dead. Burying for the half-alive.

          6. MB says:

            You slay me, HG! Er, make me laugh that is…

          7. Lorelei says:

            He may allow such piffle. HG may like some aspects of gardening. My very own home and garden show will be featured this year in a particular “social media” site. Lorelei just designed a kitchen color scheme for a friend. She was lost but now she is found.

          8. NarcAngel says:

            * mumbles *

            Speaking of landscaping…if I can’t get a wax soon, this low fro is going to require bigger panties…at the very least a comb over…

          9. MB says:

            OMG! Dying NA 🤣

          10. Alexismith2016 says:

            @NA oh god reminds me of when I did a home wax. I ended up with so many blood blisters all over. I looked like I had some sort of STI Hahhaha not pretty.

          11. NarcAngel says:


            I tried that once also. It looked like someone beat me with a 2 x 4 down there. 0 stars. Do not recommend.

          12. FYC says:

            NA, Topiary? Talk about yoga moves…

          13. WhoCares says:

            Pahaha – FYC!

        2. Awww Lorelei, sorry you’re bored. I’m getting used to it now and have a new project lined up which will more than pass the time – thank goodness! Bulbs sounds good. I’m not into gardening but I do love a pretty garden. My neighbour is always pottering around in her garden, she looks like she’s really enjoying it, so adorable. Something I wish I enjoyed, it looks incredibly relaxing.

          1. Lorelei says:

            I won’t be bored as much after today—I have a situation that will encompass time professionally. But it’s not 100% of the time, the bulbs will be planted! I am also monitoring home schooling. It’s funny that I have the interest in gardening again. It was gone for quite some time!

          2. Awww that’s great! One of the best things when our love for hobbies returns

        3. NarcAngel says:

          I won’t assume that this is what MB meant by her question, so I’ll ask my own:

          What business is deemed essential to be open and risking the health of their employees and customers to sell bloody bulbs for planting?
          And yes, by extension – I’m asking: are you daft in putting yourself and others at risk for something the squirrels might eat.

          1. Lorelei says:

            Dear NA—they sell bulbs at the grocery which is where I went. They also sell mulch and planters, etc. My level of risk right now is indeed quite elevated due to my work—and I’m actively engaged in the management of COVID patients due to my work, so until this is over, I am wearing a mask in public. In fact, I just left a briefing on how to use different intubation equipment/materials to decrease the aerosol issues. I’ve been on vacation until now but it’s over with. I’m also wearing a mask around my children. Data from NYC is that 40% of hospital admits are under age 55. (This may be a bit different today)
            One of my young colleagues was intubated Sunday but fortunately is off the ventilator. If anyone knows how serious this is, it is me. We won’t be able to staff ECMO machines. So, would I go out for just bulbs after swimming in this cess pool? No. Not now after I’m back at work. Was purchasing bulbs risky today—unlikely. In three-six weeks when we hit a peak will I have time to purchase bulbs? No. I anticipate being at work a ton because I have the fortune or misfortune of being able to manage both emergency and intensive care patients. Sorry to be snarky. It is just me—I’ve gone to efforts to make sure my dogs/cats/kids are cared for in case I need hospitalized for instance. I’ve swapped phone numbers among various friends so they can manage my home because if I even get a cold I need an inhaler. I’m not taking this lightly.

          2. NarcAngel says:

            Being on the front line and having expressed to us the seriousness of the situation, I suspected there was a different circumstance and explanation than the impression left by your comment to Alexis that basically said: you were bored and went out to buy some bulbs just to get out. I didn’t think you to be reckless , so asked you to expand. I didn’t expect such a comprehensive reply (more like: grocery store) but thank you. Snarky was appropriate given my question so I accept that, but I hope you understand it was because your initial comment seemed a bit glib and I didn’t think that impression of you apt in this circumstance.

          3. Lorelei says:

            Never a real issue NA. And I was bored but also needed additional items. But don’t think the bulbs didn’t influence which store I went to! One problem with leaving for “just” a frivolous item is that the hand hygiene etc.—creates a disdain for it. It’s like it’s a pain in the ass to clean everything I touch, not touch my face etc!

          4. MB says:

            Lorelei, please stay safe! The healthcare workers truly are the heroes in this crisis. You are running toward the danger while the rest of us are running away. May you be protected and blessed.

            There’s no way NA could’ve known your position. I understand your snarkiness, but I consider both of y’all my sisters. She will give an eloquent NA reply. And I pray, the squirrels don’t eat your bulbs while you’re out saving the world! ❤️

          5. NarcAngel says:

            I don’t anticipate an issue between Lorelei and I. It was opportunity for clarification. Perhaps I was mistaken that your comment to Lorelei was asking the same, and thought it prudent to expand on her initial comment to clear up any misconception of risk taking due to mere boredom. I did not really think that to be the case.

          6. Cat says:

            Much appreciated what you are doing for us all, in healthcare, Lorelei. Nurse friends tell me about their workdays, I am completely floored by their workload.

          7. WhoCares says:


            I had some conversations with a ‘retired’ nurse (who is having to cover extra shifts due to Covid-19) leading up to the crisis point for Covid19 here locally. Those talks were more about how her hospital was not truely prepared for this situation despite the facade and air of ‘having it all under control” offered to the media by the higher ups. On the ground less experienced medical staff didn’t even know the correct questions to ask; I know her experience will guide her through her work.
            Experienced, level-headed medical workers like yourself are surely a must needed resource at this time.

            Plant your bulbs; it is one small way to convey some “normalcy” to your children during a time when they could potentially be very stressed about the abnormalities of the current situation.

            Take care of yourself ❤️*

            *This may have come through multiple times. Apologies.

          8. Lorelei says:

            Hi Whocares. I actually think the overall response regionally has been more adequate than not. But I’m not in a hot spot either, so my view is impacted by being quite comfortable currently. My role is easy right now—it’s just that it may not remain as it currently is due to a number of factors. I only saw two patients in a span of hours. That was not stressful! Not only bulbs need planting but I have grass seed to fill in! You know you have to water that seed daily?

          9. WhoCares says:


            You can always hope for April showers?

          10. Lorelei says:

            For May showers! Hey—I found the product of a decade recently. “Goof Off” Paint remover for carpet. It’s life changing and color fast. It got black varnish off a white rug. I’ve never seen anything like it. It gives me hope.

          11. WhoCares says:

            Speaking of black paint and the like, I am really wishing for the can of chalkboard paint I had in storage – could really use it now for one wall in my place and a low-tech means to home school.

          12. WhoCares says:

            This just jogged my memory! I have a brand new set of white board markers and an eraser stashed aside…plus a small easel type whiteboard.

            My son isn’t going to be happy with me come Monday.

          13. Lorelei says:

            Omg I just watched a chalk paint video on YouTube. I decided to go with a Sherwin a Williams primer and paint my nephew recommended. It is a really crazy blue and inspired by a fellow empath. I do need to prepare the book shelf. I also have a 1965 Lane Princess hope chest from my mother. It is the ugliest thing I’ve seen—like Brady Bunch ugly. It will also be painted in the coming weeks. I was able to retrieve my hand sander thing from my ex husband. He had to maintain his facade and give it back. I don’t want to make my arms too tired.

          14. WhoCares says:

            “Brady Bunch ugly”

            That made me laugh Lorelei.

          15. Lorelei says:

            Go to and look for Lane “Princess” Aroma—Tite Cedar Chest. It is the exact item. They should have made one in 1965 and stopped before producing more.

          16. Lorelei says:

            Whocares—you came to my mind in the night due a house flipping proposal from a friend that came up in discussion. I think I told you about the Southpark “White people flipping houses episode!” My work neighborhood is littered with potential and beautiful old houses that have been neglected. Basically, my mind no longer feasts on such beastly material!

          17. WhoCares says:

            “House flipping” – don’t think I would ever do that, although it sounds fun.
            I used to have an art studio in a heritage district and I would have loved to get my hands on just one of those old gorgeous houses and fixed it up! (The timing would have been right and, given the neighborhood, it would have been a sound investment – unlike the rest of my life at that point.)

          18. Lorelei says:

            I didn’t know you were an artist? Or are? Tell me! I would much prefer living in town (even near where I work) but the neighborhood situation isn’t as safe for the kids, and especially my work neighborhood. The house flipping can’t be any worse of a choice than marrying my ex. Talk about a money pit. Endless drain. On the topic of narcissism though—he’s causing my oldest the same anxiety I experienced. It (his impact) will keep spreading like wildfire for sure. I think the conversation with her may indeed shift into coping strategies due to behaviors. She’s already been upset repeatedly over the derogatory comments he makes and all of the kids haven’t warmed up to his comrades. I am guessing they pay attention to the warnings to stay away from kidnappers and his friends look like people in utility vans.

          19. WhoCares says:


            Was. Am…just not practicing for a while now. And never full time – always alongside a regular job, until near the end of my entanglement.

            I am sorry regarding the effects of your ex’s behaviour on your kids, does sound your oldest not of the age when she has some say in whether or not she goes to see him?

          20. Lorelei says:

            Unfortunately kids don’t achieve an age where they have a “say so” where I am. He does have less influence and rarely deploys any energy to be overbearing, which is beneficial. He makes people upset and uneasy quite often. He is unpleasant and I can see the anxiety. (Not all the time of course) I also don’t wish for her to experience him negatively all the time, that would be illogical to triangulate us in such a manner. I just felt quite sad observing the effects over a simple matter last week.

          21. WhoCares says:


            “He does have less influence and rarely deploys any energy to be overbearing, which is beneficial. He makes people upset and uneasy quite often. He is unpleasant and I can see the anxiety. ”

            Perhaps the pandemic is exacerbating his negative behaviour? I hope, for your daughter’s sake.

          22. Lorelei says:

            Whocares—I’m so excited. My baby bulbs are peaking out of the mulch!

          23. WhoCares says:

            Lorelei – tulips?

          24. Lorelei says:

            No dahlia babies. Tulips are in full bloom as I planted many about ten years ago that still flourish. I let my tulips die down and don’t cut the brown off—I believe this process feeds the bulb. I mulch over the ugly. I have many lily and iris plantings waiting to come up.

          25. WhoCares says:

            Dahlias: nice. Sounds a beautiful flower garden Lorelei.

          26. Lorelei says:

            Agree! I planted more since that post and some morning glory seeds. I need to stop. I’ll have to dig new beds otherwise and that’s not of interest as I have plenty.

          27. WhoCares says:

            Nice avatar, Lorelei!

          28. Lorelei says:

            Thanks Whocares. It’s my new kitty. She was way too pretty to be at a shelter. She molds to me like a fur coat and is absolutely lovely. Dainty and cute. She was found in a really crap neighborhood, I think she used to eat mice. I won’t hold it against her.

          29. WhoCares says:

            She’s a very pretty white cat. 💛

          30. Lorelei says:

            She will be catered to like a queen!

          31. FYC says:

            Gorgeous new cat, Lorelei! She looks quite content. So good of you to choose a rescue! Thank you!

          32. Lorelei says:

            Thank you FYC. She is absolutely adorable. I just got her soft claws in the mail, but don’t want to harass her with them for now. She needs brushed but again, she needs time. She was found a year ago in a bad neighborhood. I don’t have any idea beyond that. She’s the prettiest cat I’ve ever had. She has a fancy collar on order. I think she’s too refined for living amongst the lower lessers.

          33. FYC says:

            Most definitely, Lorelei. No lessers for that beauty. She is painted white, so she might be safe, but best to leave her fully equipped with her claws!

          34. Lorelei says:

            Precisely FYC. No lessers. I can’t find her today yet to put her nail caps on. They are multi colored. I will say it’s a bad idea to ask a rescue if they have any de-clawed cats. I was instantly a narcissistic pariah psycho. I was berated by a woman with blue hair & chin hairs. It’s like walking into the Catholic Church and asking for an abortion. Not a good idea. We got a kick out of it at my work because a few friends said they were going to call and report me for torturing the cat. Holy shit I never said I was going to perform the procedure! It was an inquiry. Ms. Chin hair offered me a sick or biting declawed cat in punishment until she relented. I was spat at until the very end. Even a lower lesser wouldn’t slide in between the sheets with this bitch. They’d run in fear! HG would walk away too—he would have material to write from!

          35. Lorelei says:

            He’s still working so I assume being a dick to his employees should keep him well fueled.

          36. WhoCares says:

            Lorelei, yeah being at work still is likely a good thing for him – and your children.

          37. Lorelei says:

            A tip—order a waxing kit off Amazon before they run out. I got mine today NA. It’s easy to do yourself when you are desperate. Mine has little beads that head up and liquify and you don’t even need paper strips.

          38. Lorelei says:

            NA—I hope HG pushes this through as is a link for you. This is a good waxing kit. They will likely sell out I’d imagine.

            Wax Warmer, Femiro Hair Removal Home Waxing Kit with 4 Flavors Stripless Hard Wax Beans(14.1oz)20 Wax Applicator Sticks for Full Body, Legs, Face, Eyebrows, Bikini Women Men Painless At Home Waxing

          39. HG Tudor says:

            Final waxing post. I declare, wax off!

          40. Lorelei says:

            Thanks HG. You don’t want an itchy society.

          41. Violetta says:


            I want to hug her and pet her and pat her and SQUEEZE her….

            My friend called the other day. Even the cat is suffering from social distancing (there are usually lots of folks for always dinner or gaming, and the cat gets attention from everybody). He held the phone to the cat’s ear, I made my standard inane kitty-petting noises, and the cat scent-marked the phone.

          42. Lorelei says:

            Violetta—she is precious. HG wrote somewhere he can’t stand people that post pictures of cats!

        4. Violetta says:

          LYSISTRATA—Darling Laconian, Lampito, hail! / How I admire your gleaming gorgeousness, / Your radiant skin, your body sleek and plump. / I bet that you could choke a bull.
          LAMPITO—I could. / I’m in such shape I kick my own sweet ass.
          CALONICE—(prodding curiously) And what a brace of boobs. How bountiful!
          MYRRHINE—(peeking under woman’s clothes) Boetian- sure enough: / Just look at what a broad and fertile plain
          CALONICE—(peeking likewise) She’s even pulled the weeds. Now that is class.

        5. Narc noob says:

          Lorelei, my hat goes off to you, and I wish to say a BIG thank you for all you’re doing in the ED and ICU. I was just reflecting today what I would do if hospitals needed more help, if they got inundated and couldn’t fulfil the roles with already trained nurses… hopefully it doesn’t come to that. Stay well 🤞👌

          1. Lorelei says:

            Thank you Narc noob. It is a calm before a storm, no visitors allowed at all so to be honest, it is quiet.

      3. fox says:

        alexissmith2016 I know what you mean. My heart hurts too from all of this. I was being so stoic, happy even, as this hasn’t really affected me much at all. But I let the thoughts sink in about how much people all over are suffering for various reasons in this situation, and I just broke down and cried. It’s pretty overwhelming.

        1. Hi Fox, yes it’s tough. It is perfectly okay for you to be happy. It can be incredibly overwhelming. There is much sadness in the world and we can’t be there to protect everyone. It can be a tough concept to be happy whilst we know others are experiencing pain but it is okay. But there is plenty we can do to help others. It doesn’t have to be huge. Anything at all is welcome I’m sure. Even just shopping for an elderly neighbour. Anything which fits in with your own world. Not Ns though…we don’t need to help Ns just Es and normals hahaha

          1. fox says:

            Oh definitely, I am mindful of the limits of what I can do and do what I can. And don’t worry, I have been reading HG’s work long enough to learn how to spot N’s in my life and cut them off, even if I can’t categorize them that well yet, haha.

    3. WhoCares says:

      I’d like to see the statistical breakdown of “mental health crises” at this time – but we will never get a true picture. Because some of those instances will be true victims breaking under the stress and abuse and other “crises” will look like a similar set of symptoms – but are actually due to a fuel crisis.

      1. Alexissmith2016 says:

        Exactly right who cares!

        1. WhoCares says:

          Alexissmith – I already know of a mid-ranger who has had a “breakdown” of sorts because of the “exhaustion” and stress of having to “care” for her elderly relative – but it is because she doesn’t have her empathic sibling at her beck and call to assist her (the Empath does all the actual hands on care and getting stuff done) – but in reality, this mid-ranger is conserving energy because of lack of access to secondary sources (and I am pretty certain her primary source is an UL, therefore, she is already on shaky ground in a lockdown situation.)

          1. alexissmith2016 says:

            Releived to hear the mid is locked down with a mid!

            Oh my gosh, imagine if the internet and mobile networks all crashed for a period of time. How would narcy narcs cope then? I mean I’d struggle but I’d endure it knowing that the creatures inside the majority of narcs would be escaping everywhere.

          2. WhoCares says:

            That’s a bit scarier than Covid-19:

            “Oh my gosh, imagine if the internet and mobile networks all crashed for a period of time. How would narcy narcs cope then?”

      2. Narc noob says:

        WhoCares, I know you have been here longer then me, just wondering if you know whether that *crisis* is the creature emerging?

        We had a special report here down – under about that playing out in the months that follow.

        1. WhoCares says:

          Narc noob,

          I would guess that most narcissists are not cognizant of their ‘creature’ – at least in the way that HG is when he writes of it. However, HG has written a very good answer elsewhere of what sorts of things a narcissist in a fuel crisis (or chronic shortage) experiences – can’t remember what thread…perhaps K can find it, if she is reading and has some time.
          But I think you would be correct to say that at base; it is the creature emerging.

          1. Narc noob says:

            Thank you for your reply WC.

            I know of a LMR (my diagnosis) who went through such a time, they are back to *normal* now but some of that could have been the support (fuel) they tapped into while moving through their crisis.

            Hope you are staying healthy!

          2. WhoCares says:

            Narc noob,

            My LMRN experienced anxiety and panic attacks towards the end of the formal relationship. I now think these symptoms may have been, in part, due to chronic fuel shortages. Mine is “normal” now; well I think anyway – don’t truly know since I am NC.

            Stay safe and healthy too NN!

          3. Narc noob says:

            Whocares, wow, I see. Bizaare! I wasn’t aware you were involved with a LMR. The LMRN I am speaking of (not sure of diagnosis now after i got 22 and 28 in the quiz) is married to an upper lesser and they had to be hospitalized a few times due to severe panic attacks.

            What did your EDC reveal, if I may ask?

          4. WhoCares says:

            Narc Noob,

            That is curious re: hospitalization for panic attacks.

            I don’t mind sharing my EDC results:
            Majority: Standard/Carrier
            Significant: Super/Magnet
            With sprinkles of Codependent-Contagion/Martyr thrown in for fun!

            Did you do the EDC? Sorry if you have shared previously and I have missed it.

          5. Narc noob says:

            WC, no, I haven’t done it yet but suspect the same as you, SC with some contagion. A sprinkling of the others also. Thanks for the feed back. 👍