30 Shards of Ice
Words are our weapons. Easy to use, low in energy expenditure but with such potential. The capacity to charm, to flatter, to instil joy, to create desire, love and passion, to engender affection and much more besides. Words can be used to soothe, to convince, to persuade and to calm. Those words can also hurt, upset, annoy and frustrate. Cutting comments, acidic accusations and pernicious put-downs. The greater of our kind show particular ingenuity in assembling those savage sentences which cause despair and generate misery for the recipient. We adopt a considered approach in respect of the uttering of these barbed comments.
- They will be reserved most often for strangers and minions in order to reinforce our superiority and to show off in front of you, our primary source. We have no façade to maintain with the newspaper vendor, the waitress or the driver of another car. They will suffer the caustic words to allow the provision of fuel to us by their shocked and upset reaction and also from you by reason of your admiration at our masterful handling of the incompetent person serving us.
- Those who form the façade rarely receive the lash of our tongue unless they deceive us and become treacherous. For the most part those people will only ever experience the pouring of honey in their ears and the sugar-coated pleasantries which are designed to keep the loyal to us and to maintain the façade to our benefit.
- The worst of these comments is directed at you as our primary source of fuel. The issuing of nasty, malevolent and hurtful comments will be saved for you during devaluation for the purposes of causing the maximum provision of fuel and the assertion of our control. Slurs about your life, your appearance, your family, your interests, your job and your friends will be routinely hurled at you. This will happen repeatedly, like a machine gun firing our bilious bullets towards you. We also like to wield a show stopper of a comment, a particularly chilling comment which is designed to drive a shard of ice through your heart. The type of comment which leaves you in a stunned silence at the malice it contains. The nature of the comment leaves you horrified that somebody would say that to you, somebody who is meant to love and cherish you, somebody who once said the most wonderful things to you (and will do so again in about a week as the rollercoaster ride gets into its stride). These comments are designed to deliver maximum hurt, total upset and have that negative fuel pouring from you. They may leave you stunned, sickened, frightened and anxious, they will chill you to the core but our kind will always deliver them because words are our weapons. Here are thirty icy shards which are driven through your hearts.
- I will always be in your head and your heart. You will never ever escape me.
- I will not stop. Ever.
- You know, I thought about your funeral before and it troubled me. It troubled me because I would no longer be able to punish you.
- Nobody likes you, that is why your dad left you, you know. Nobody else will say it but I will.
- I hope it takes years of therapy to sort you out.
- You think this is bad? This is nothing. I am just getting started.
- I always know where you are.
- You are my puppet and I will never cut the strings.
- I know everything about you. Remember that.
- It’s strange what can happen when you are asleep.
- No matter how far you go I will always find you, because I own you.
- I only chose you because I felt sorry for you.
- You have no idea what is going through my mind right now have you? But I know exactly what you are thinking.
- Go on scream, nobody is listening.
- You are not a person to me.
- I’ve caressed you. Now I am going to crush you.
- Just think, you have already had the happiest moment in your life.
- You have told me all your secrets. Remember that.
- I’m diseased and I’ve infected every part of you.
- Nobody will ever believe what you say.
- I’m the permanent reminder of all the things you want to forget.
- I will teach our children to hate you.
- I’m going to show you what loneliness really is.
- This is happening because you are a bad person.
- I need to cleanse you and I will not stop until it is done.
- When you close your eyes you will only ever see my face.
- I will never let you go.
- I will never put you out of your misery.
- I hate her because she reminds me too much of you.
- This is what will happen for the rest of your life.
There are many more, but what have you been told which has stopped you in your tracks and sent a chill through you?
32 thoughts on “30 Shards of Ice”
Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
Is #14 the same as “Go on, scream. No one can hear you.”?
BC30, probably. Even more so if you have Deaf neighbours (that is Deaf, not dead……laughing) 😉
H.G, I’ve tried to comment under a question asked by Fidderless twice now and it’s not showing up. Is it awaiting moderation, or am I not submitting it properly?
“I’ve been getting into snuff porn, lately. You only have to try it once.”
Wow, Karmicoverload, this is shocking. I had to look up “snuff porn”, I didn’t know what it was. I didn’t know such a thing existed. Does that mean anyone, at any age, can access such videos easily?
May I ask you how you responded to such a statement?
Expect the Feds to kick your down down in 5…4…3…2…1
They’ll be seeing feathers everywhere by the sounds of it !!
Oddly, this reminds me of the time one of my exes decided to kill chickens for dinner on top of a building in NYC proper. Police showed up because feathers were falling down from the roof.
BC30, laughing…… so it was not a pillow fight then? 😉
Haha I see what you did there. So strange they found chicken in the city, but that man is one of a kind.
BC30, laughing. Sounds like that the chicken was also ‘one of a kind’….LOL.
“Expect the Feds to kick your down down in 5…4…3…2…1” : Good, I am relieved. I was beginning to wonder if kids/teenagers could access that. Not that it is better for adults to access that horror, but I tend to be very naïve as far as some humans’ sick mind is concerned in that department, and I suddenly thought of my students in case they could have seen that and what it could do to them. I would have been terrified of the world we have to live in if I’d known it existed when I was young. Doesn’t reassure me now, but at least I know better how to be less affected by the idea.
Yes, the Feds will appear.
First time I came across it was in a Nicholas Cage movie “8mm”. I’m not surprised you’ve never heard of it, Fiddleress. That was my first introduction and it was very mild in comparison to what I’m sure is out there. I don’t even want to imagine. It really is shocking to contemplate some people have become that depraved.
At the time he said it, I laughed and thought it was a joke. It was only later that night when I considered the severity of it due to what came after. He had been drinking heavily. He made a demand of me which he knew I couldn’t fulfil. When I tried to put up a boundary, he got extremely angry and started taking my words out of context deliberately, claiming I had insulted his manhood…I hadn’t. But this led to him spewing vile statements about my sexual prowess. “F*CK OFF, you over-f*cked loose piece of action. I have had far tighter p*ssy’s than you, your p*ssy is boring. No tread. No action.” And so on.
I also recall him telling me he had once put his hands to his ex-wife’s throat.
All this made me realise just how much he hates women, and due to his dwindling circle, I now think he actually doesn’t have anything to lose. Quite frightened of him now, where I never was before.
I thought I’d replied to this, but I obviously didn’t submit, sorry! Here I go again;
Initially, I took it as a joke and I laughed. It was only what followed that evening which led me to consider the true ramifications. He was drinking heavily. Vodka. Always a bad sign of things to come.
A text conversation began, and he made a demand of me which he knew I couldn’t possibly fulfil. He wanted an answer and he wanted it NOW. When I tried to stay firm, he got angry. Started twisting my words and implied I had insulted his manhood….I hadn’t.
Next came his reaction to my supposed insult. “F*ck you, you loose piece over over-f*cked action. I have had far tighter p*ssy’s than yours, which is boring. No tread. No action.”
This is probably the most personal he has been in his misogyny, and it highlighted to me just how much he hates women.
He once told me “I knew my marriage was over when I put my hands around her (The ex-wife’s) throat.”
I have never been afraid of him until this point, but now….his supplies are dwindling as people have wised up to him over the years, I was the one source he had a closeness and
physical access to, unless we count the possibility of hook-ups and prostitutes. I have actually been scared enough by what he said to realise I will never be alone with him again.
It’s awful what he said to you, KO, and it’s depraved what he suggested. Definitely not a joke, but who would believe there are actually people who are into this stuff? I’m not surprised you didn’t take him seriously at first. Narcs are also bluffers (con artists), so they might just say something like that for shock value. Either way, his language and likely his actions are becoming more violent. Definitely don’t ever be alone with him again, and maybe the time to GOSO has arrived. The balance has tipped out of the narcissist’s favour. Think about it, KO.
Yes, I think the time has definitely come. I have now blocked him on all platforms, but my ET is still high because he lives next door, so I still have to see and hear him. And I’m still thinking maybe I am the abuser, as he has claimed many times. It’s ridiculous that I am even considering I could have MADE him say those awful things to me.
KO, you are not the abuser. He is. Do not think you “made” him say those things. His narcissism did. It is really nothing you did or said (in our perspective) – his narcissism caused your ‘reactions’ through your emotional thinking. If you can, tell yourself that it is not really anything you said / did – my own ET ‘conned’ me to think / feel like that for a very long time. I know enough now to never permit my own mind or emotions to get to “that place” again.
Karmicoverload, I’m glad you’ve blocked him on all platforms for now. And I imagine your ET is high with him being in such close proximity. There have to be multiple triggers for both of you in the circumstances, certainly hoover triggers for him. I’m not sure how you get around that without one of you moving, It definitely seems like something needs to change.
For him to claim you are the abuser is typical narc projection, so don’t buy into that. He is the abuser, you are the abused. And just the use of that word should help clarify what is happening. You didn’t MAKE him say anything. He has as much control over what he says and does as you do. And what he says and does is his responsibility. Put it back where it belongs. And don’t accept the terrible things he said to you as being anything other than the screaming of a toddler that didn’t get his way.
At the same time, he is likely much more dangerous than a toddler so I would hope you could consult with HG if necessary to help effect your escape.
Karmic, what he said to you was despicable, I agree with LET that it was him screaming like a toddler who didn’t get his way. I hope you did not let what he said get to you; I remember that even when I was told things I knew were total fabrications, it still hurt that a person I loved or had loved could say such things.
I also see that he is a neighbour of yours. Now that is a bummer. I’m sure you have already considered moving away if he won’t, even if it seems unfair to have to go to that length. But I can really understand why you are frightened of him. Your peace of mind and probably ultimately your health are to be put in the balance with keeping your home, maybe?Sorry if I’m talking without knowing all the details. It’s just that I imagine myself in your situation and I find it very disturbing.
Let us know how things go. Thinking of you, Karmic.
Thank you all for your kind comments. I would love to move, but the devil is in the detail, here. I am married. An open marriage, my husband is aware of the relationship with the narc. As much as he hates what he has done, he absolutely will not consider moving. My husband has a very rigid plan to stay here until our mortgage is paid off, we only have a few years left. Then we move abroad. We have been raising our kids in what is considered a “deprived area” since they were babies, partly out of necessity due to low income and partly because we wanted to be mortgage free as soon as possible. If we moved, it would scupper that. I couldn’t imagine moving my family to an even more poverty-stricken area, where we are is grim enough.
I have to hope that narc will realise we are done and that he moves. I know he has been applying for jobs in London, so let’s hope he keeps his mask on long enough to be accepted at an interview.
It’s awful, awful, terrible, horrible, and what I’ve watched, and I wish I could undo having watched. I was exposed through employment. I hate it. Grisly.
Someone has to do those jobs, better the narcissists than I.
I watched a program called “The Cleaners” about the people who have to scroll through the mountains of garbage posted on the internet for one of the companies (maybe Facebook?). Anyway, it was harrowing, and I wasn’t even being exposed to the images the ‘cleaners’ were while watching it. That’s how bad the videos and images were. They were all deeply affected by it, but it may have been the only paying job they could get (outsourced to the Phillipines). I won’t go into details, but if anyone gets a chance to view the documentary I’d suggest it’s well worth it. Just to understand what true evil exists in the world, and that some people are forced to be exposed to just to put food on the table. I would not want their job. Your are right, BC30. Those with a lack of empathy would be much better suited to do jobs like these.
At first I laughed, and took it was one of his “odd” jokes. It was only as the evening unfolded that I reflected on how sinister it may actually have been. He was on the vodka. We had recently started seeing each other again, after I’d tried (And failed) to escape for the millionth time. He started a loud and angry rant on his doorstep regarding having to live in the UK. As I could see where the night was going, I declined his offer when he invited me round. Big mistake. He then began the messaging, which went on for hours and included him making completely unreasonable demands he knew I couldn’t meet. He then twisted my words and implied I had insulted his d*ck size (I hadn’t, in any way), and he verbally abused me worse than he ever has done in his life. “I have had far tighter p*ssy’s than yours…which is boring. No tread. No action. F*ck you, you over-f*cked, loose piece of action.”
I left the conversation when he then started asking me for a blow job. I woke up to 85 messages asking for a blow job in various different ways! He had carried on the conversation for a whole hour after I left.
It actually made me realise how deranged he really was, and how much he actually hates me.
Long story short, I blocked him. I think I was mistaken in previously thinking he wasn’t dangerous.
Thank you for your reply, karmicoverload. I can totally relate to the way you reacted (thinking it was a “joke”, not believing that he could actually be dangerous). But you declining when he invited you round doesn’t seem like a mistake at all. On the contrary, that was a wise move!
The way you say he went on reminds me of the way the last narc I knew could go on – including about sexual matters generally though not sex between us – that happened only once (and a half, as I like to put it, and then I turned down his further ‘proposals’). He would say things he knew would make me mad.
You are right to think the guy you are talking about can be dangerous, and I hope that you have managed to block and escape him for good now.
Ranting about having to live in the UK, huh? My daughter’s father always ranted about having to live in France (he is German), and the last one would rant about having to live where he lives (my home city, and he hated and despised all people who came from this city of course). They didn’t “have to”. Makes you wonder why they don’t up sticks and f*ck off somewhere else, but that’s not the point, is it. Plus they’d lose an easy topic to rant about.
I do hope you are well rid of the guy xx
He always claimed he was “trapped” in the UK because of his kids, and now Covid. Although I suspect there’s a big part of what you said (Re. He would lose something to complain about and an excuse for his bad attitude…”I’m so sick of this place, what a victim I am to be stuck here, wahhhh wahhhh wahhhh”), I think another reason he hasn’t left is because he had burned his bridges everywhere else. He only had decent supply left here, from me, his kids and the ex-wife. He’s done for I his previous haunts, and I suspect he knows it.
I really want this to be the end now.
KO, sorry to read what you endured – glad that you are physically safe. Hope you are ok ET / LT wise.
ET is high. I have to keep asking people if I’m doing the right thing, or if it was me who caused his behaviour.
KO, no need to ask any more. No need to question yourself any longer, either. Write these words in your own words on post-it notes, and other words of ‘power of positivity’ to remind yourself……just don’t stick the post-its onto yourself 😉 It is not you, it is your ET and addiction to narcissism. You can do it. You have strength in you to do so. It is just a ‘wobbly’ and you can get through it x
K, I actually googled that……. ! I laughed though – good joke 🙂
“I can read you like an open book”, and this sounded like a threat.
Like hell he could, as he discovered when I escaped his grip and he was very surprised!