Gabby Petito & Brian Laundrie : Analysis Part One


HG Tudor dissects and analyses in detail the body cam footage from the incident at Woab,Utah on 12 August 2021 so you truly understand what was going on. Sensational insight.

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53 thoughts on “Gabby Petito & Brian Laundrie : Analysis Part One

  1. mollyb5 says:

    It doesn’t matter if you think you have boundaries ..the narc will play along tell he has you . He knows how to pretend and act for years he can play one way with you and then his anger is directed at work or the land lord or ..Democrats , or republicans . He will make his anger seem to be fueled by your family , by the news program , by the neighbor next door. He compartmentalizes and will treat the primary one way for years …until you spend 24 hours a day with him for a whole week and nobody else around …the anger will eventually be on you. If he goes any number of places during a day …someone will get the anger directed at them …possibly an even an animal if his facade is needed to play on every one around him . Gabby eventually got it directed on to her ..she was apologizing to the others he directed his hate on waitresses …if he needs to have a facade with his dinner date . The narc I know would hold my hand , open car doors , take dance lessons with me , climb trees to get an old bird nest for my collection . He pay for my rent , buy me clothes , do fix-up and remodel jobs for my family even . He took off work to lay in the hospital with me for weeks ! Yes I had boundaries I was married before for many years . I was treated with respect by my father and my 4 brothers . One was an ass and we all watched out for him . My point is …you need to observe and watch and know the red flags , you need to read up now so you understand it’s not you … anyone especially empaths are going to get burned . Anyone !

  2. BC30 says:

    Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. Thanks to what I have learned from HG, I have gotten a long way with teaching my nieces about narcissists through the use of boundaries and not only in romantic relationships. It’s nearly impossible to understand what they are if you haven’t lived through the experience, but with boundaries you are safe.**

    **The odds of being ensnared by a Greater are miniscule.

    1. A Victor says:

      BC3, yes! And with teaching the boundaries that if someone crosses them, your boundary becomes NC! I never felt I had permission, the right, to do this, didn’t even know about it actually. I thought it was all about the emotions, I didn’t want to hurt the other person, to my own detriment quite often. You are so right, I am going to talk with my kids about teaching my grandkids this also, actively, they need to know it’s okay! Thank you for sharing this!

  3. mollyb5 says:

    HG ..women get all bent out of shape with the word Bitch , the narc doesn’t say this in public he can say it under his breath if he wants , whatever works . I believe narcs all think this all of them ….it fuels them totally , He ( narc ) hates you .. he hates everyone he is angry and frustrated and never content he may not know why he always feels this way …it won’t stop , if you are the primary “you” are the reason he always feels this angry and burning hate .
    It Doesn’t

    matter if you entertain him if you are beautiful , if you are caring if you are understanding , or if you are wealthy ( you are the controller of money ) he hates and only disguises his hate . If he wants to disguise it he will show a fake smile …some will think it’s real for a long time. It’s the hate that fuels their whole life . If you are with them 24 hours a day for any length of time …he will take that hate out on you just for saying “What?” In the “wrong” tone of voice . Or he will walk away and drive like an angry maniac fast and frustrated tell he finds another he to take the hate away temporarily because he’s distracted showing some charm . Squelching the hate and anger temporarily. I wonder if mushroom therapy will retrain the narcs brain ? Lol

  4. mollyb5 says:

    The narc is always blaming the empath for being a bitch around anything the narc does …it gets drilled in her head that she caused him to react the way he chooses. He will say over and over , “if you would just stop being a bitch then I wouldn’t get so mad at you “. If you just stop trying to ( organize) control everything then I wouldn’t get so pissed at you”. If you would just stop talking so much and listen once in a while then I would t get so pissed”. This is said and yelled and drilled into the empaths head every day every time they’re together. If you would …if you would just …if you would stop this or that . I saw myself in Gabbys actions . I know first hand what she was feeling …I could feel it through the tv” I was in that situation 2 times with the narc . She is trying to be “fair”. She thinks she started the argument and she thinks she caused him to hit her . She is trying to be fair ! She doesn’t want him to get in trouble or arrested ….then he will really be pissed and that would make everything worse in her mind at the time ….that’s what she is thinking .

    1. A Victor says:

      Sometimes it is much more subtle than “bitch”. My ex never once called me that, or any other names like that, in 23 years, yet, in my mind, much of the problem was me, my hormones, my needs etc. Subtle but effective, I’m still not entirely sure how he did it.

      1. BC30 says:


        1. A Victor says:

          BC30, I love your new avi!

          Yes it was instinctively but I still don’t understand the manipulations he used to bring it about. I saw your comment elsewhere that you know how to spot them and what to do. I am not there yet with the MMR. This makes me nervous about dating again, I’ll hold off until I understand it better. Lessers and even LMR I think are easy for me to spot now. But my ex was so subtle, and that’s the type most drawn to me also, I will be reading up on manipulations this weekend I guess. He was not physical, did not use names or obvious words to put me down…I don’t know how to describe it, except subtle. And effective. I am still terrified of not seeing the signs and being caught by one of these again. Will I think someone being “nice” to me is one of these? Shouldn’t I? Wouldn’t a normal or empath also be nice? It is confusing.

  5. BC30 says:

    Which school, if any, are more susceptible to taking blame?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      All empaths engage in this, but codependents the most.

  6. BC30 says:

    Always, always, always SEPARATE the parties and reassure the parties before questioning. Ugh. What an absolute failure here.

  7. leelasfuelstinks says:

    It´s so hard to see how Gabby is blaming herself and takes all the blame! I apologize for not being able to understand this behavior because I have no idea how it is like to blame yourself for everything. I thought at some point everybody realizes that those blames are HUGE BULLSHIT! That they are not true and the victim is NOT at fault! When I was the IPPS of my ULA, I knew that I am NOT to blame, I knew that´s just BULLSHIT what he says. I cried many tears too but not because I blamed myself but because of this FUCKING INJUSTICE that happened to me, those blames were BULLSHIT, were unfair, were mean and I knew that! I cried out of anger. I never apologized! I never thought that I am the problem, I thought, HE is the fucking problem! And lashing out at me was just unfair! I did not apologize, gave him a Silent Treatment instead.

    When my MMRA (non-intimate) blame-shifted I fought back and after the merry go round, I faked contrition, gave false apologies, just to make him SHUT THE FUCK UP!

    It breaks my heart to see Gabby and also other victims REALLY blaming themselves! 😭

    1. Leigh says:

      Leela, thank you for sharing this. I wonder if you don’t take on the blame because you are a Super empath. I don’t know if you’ve been following my posts lately but one of my daughters is a narcissist (confirmed by Mr. Tudor). The other one doesn’t seem like a narcissist but I’ve been afraid I might have the rose colored glasses on for her. What you wrote here, is exactly how my non-narcissist daughter feels. She’s in a toxic relationship right now and takes on very little blame for his shitty actions. Thank you for sharing. I really needed to see this.

      I could definitely relate to Gabby. I had often taken on the blame as well.

      1. NarcAngel says:

        If I’m remembering correctly, you are an ACON?
        Did you take on the blame in that role as well? Or strictly in your intimate relationships?

        Apologies of course if that is too personal a question.

        1. Leigh says:

          NA, oh that’s interesting. Its not too personal at all. I love questions that make me think. I did not take on the blame for my parents. Not one little bit. I blamed them for being abusive. Even as a child because I had to take care of my brothers.

          So why do I do it in my intimate relationships then? Not only did I do it with my husband, I did it with workplace narc too. Very interesting.

          Thank you for asking that question. If I ever get the nerve to have a consult with Mr. Tudor, that will be one of my questions.

          1. Asp Emp says:

            Leigh, can I ask why you say “if I ever get the nerve to have a consult with Mr. Tudor”?

          2. Leigh says:

            Hi Asp, how are you? Hope you’re well. Yes you may ask. Its because I’m a scaredy cat. I don’t know why but Mr. Tudor makes me incredibly nervous.

          3. Asp Emp says:

            Leigh, thank you for your response. Thank you for answering my question. It is not in HG’s intention to do anything other than empower people like us, whether it’s knowledge / understanding, or advice. Should you ever decide to consult with HG, I would like to advise you to completely forget any ‘labels’ because that is all they are to you and me, ‘labels’. He is a professional when he consults with people and gives the best advice you can obtain from someone who knows all about narcissism and the affects of it. If you go for the half an hour consult, you can always arrange further consults later. No need for nervousness, at all.

            Thank you for asking, I am ok 🙂

          4. Leigh says:

            Asp, yes I know Mr. Tudor’s intention is to empower and weaponize the empath. Im beyond grateful that he has done that for me. Im still a scaredy cat though, lol.

        2. Leigh says:

          NA, I thought about this some more and I take on the blame for my narcissist daughter as well. Im guessing ut stems from guilt. I don’t feel guilty for my parents. Whereas with my daughter or intimate partners it might have been something I did that caused the abuse from them.

      2. leelasfuelstinks says:

        You´re welcome, Leigh and I´m so sorry to hear that you have a narc-daughter. 🙁

        Actually, I hurts very badly to see, how fellow-Empaths take the blame! I cannot understand it, I cannot relate to it, because I feel that I take enough pride in myself in order NOT to take the blame! The narc can kiss my ass! I DO NOT take the blame! I think it is very likely that the reason for this is that I am a Super and thus, high in narcissistic traits. My narcissistic trait of pride prevents me from taking the blame. And for me it´s very had to see beyond that trait, so very hard to imagine that those poor fellow-Empaths take the blame. I would love to shake all of those Empaths, pour a glass of cold water over them and say: “WAKE UP!! YOU ARE WORTHY! TAKE PRIDE IN YOURSELF!! IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT”. I feel the desire to save them, to wake them up, to help them! It HURTS to see that! 🙁

        Does this somehow make sense?

      3. leelasfuelstinks says:

        By the way, I remember when Patri Narc put me down, blame shifted and projected. Did not believe it! Didn´t take it! I just thought: “BULLSHIT, YOU ASSHOLE!” 😀 I hated him for criticizing me all the time! So many times I yelled: “JUST FUCKING ACCEPT ME THE WAY I AM!” Of course I ignited his fury and he lashed out at me. But deep down, even though I cried many tears, I knew: Patri Narc is wrong and a big huge asshole!

        1. Leigh says:

          Leela, with my dad. I was a golden child but still abused. It was such a bizarre feeling. He didn’t really ever put me down. He just would use his fists to discipline.

          Both of my daughters feel the same way about their father as you feel about your father. Their father, my husband, is a victim narcissist. They don’t take on any blame for him. They think he’s an asshole too. He’s very critical of them and they hate it too.

          As for your pride not allowing you to take on the blame for their shitty behaviors, I definitely get it. I’m high in Pride too and when it kicks in, it’s not good for the narcissist.

          Thank you for sharing.

  8. WhoCares says:

    This is so disturbing. I mean, in a bad way and a good way though… it’s takes me back…
    When the officer first asks Gabby to step out of the vehicle; her demeanor…her rambling…and not making any sense…the taking on of blame. She’s been in crisis mode for some time and doesn’t know it.
    Who wouldn’t be? Stuck in a van, for some time, with one of their kind.

    Thank-you so much for doing this HG. This analysis is a hard one to watch, but so valuable, it terms of it’s portrayal of a victim at her wits end, along with your accompanying- and very astute – observations and commentary.

    It’s deeply saddening that it comes as a consequence of the tragic ending of Gabby’s life. But at the same time it’s completely sobering to be reminded of what the IPPS endures and, in this case, how the IPPS presents during an extended devaluation.

    And to be completely honest it gives me renewed appreciation for my narc-free, safe home (of two years plus now) and the fact that I got out.
    Gabby never got out.

    1. A Victor says:

      “And to be completely honest it gives me renewed appreciation for my narc-free, safe home (of two years plus now) and the fact that I got out.” – Absolutely. So heartbreaking for Gabby, she has touched so many with her life and hopefully it helps make others aware of the reality of narcissism, including law enforcement. It is just heartbreaking.

      Toward the end of my time living with my ex I had begun to wonder if he was involved in murders and rapes around the area and the fires that happened in town. Looking back with regard to this case, those thoughts are terrifying.

      1. WhoCares says:


        “hopefully it helps make others aware of the reality of narcissism”


        “I had begun to wonder if he was involved in murders and rapes around the area and the fires that happened in town”

        Scary thoughts indeed, AV.

      2. lickemtomorrow says:

        Wow, AV, that last thought is a very sobering one indeed. There appear to be quite a number who live their lives normally until they are caught, and there’s a good chance some never are … it’s really remarkable how they often appear to be upstanding members of the community in the midst of it. The hindsight thing when it comes to narcissism, etc. can be very impactful after we make the discovery of what we’ve been entangled with and how that has played out. It’s almost impossible for us to know any of this at the time. So glad you’re out and have stayed out. Looks like your kids are benefitting enormously, too. Well done to have survived so much and still be the caring and considerate person you are today. I see a year has passed now as well … we don’t see that time go in while we are here! I hope the next year will see bigger and better things for you and yours <3

        1. A Victor says:

          LET, thank you for the well wishes. Yes, those were sobering thoughts at the time also. They began on an early morning as I watched a house kitty corner from us burn to the ground, he happened to come home as I watched, it just struck me as odd, the timing and his reaction, no surprise, no horror or sadness for the man who lived there, no concern for him, it was so strange. I had begun to realized by that point that he had no regard for anyone or anything, I just didn’t have a name for it yet, it was a terrifying time, like we were playing a game of cat and mouse, never sure which one was which. Had I realized the possible enormity of the danger, I may have taken steps earlier to get away from him. But like with the cheating, there was no proof, so I dismissed those thoughts when they occurred. And I couldn’t ask him of course, he would’ve just lied anyway, and it may have put us in danger to do so. This Gabby Petito situation has really brought out some things in my mind. I guess that is the purpose HG has in mind when doing these analyses, to make people think. As such the first one was quite emotional. Now I am really wanting to know more, to understand it better. Haha, a true truth seeker I guess, even as it makes me sad, that evil happens, for Gabby, for all the victims of these things, and our families.

          1. lickemtomorrow says:

            AV, there are so many layers to your story and experiences. I’ve never heard the expression “kitty corner” before, but I take it to mean a house that was opposite yours on a corner? His lack of any kind of reaction or response is actually chilling. Could be purely a lack of any kind of empathy, and no doubt he didn’t feel he needed to impress you with a show of empathy at that stage. If he’d wanted to impress during a golden period he would have run over and tried to do whatever he could to help. Probably put out the fire single handed! Or at least that’s what he would have told people. Not sure if you think he had a level of involvement, but the fact the thought crossed your mind makes it possible. Of course, if makes me think of HG’s more recent article “Burn” where a perceived slight could be cause for retaliation. Or not. It seems fire setters can have multiple reasons for doing what they do and it doesn’t necessarily have to be an act of retaliation.

            It must have been quite a tense time, the description you give of the ‘cat and mouse’ type game you were playing, having a sense of the danger but never being able to quite put your finger on it. It makes me wonder if that awareness was also what kept you from leaving. Much like you knew to accuse him could have proved dangerous as well. There are so many subtleties to our individual situations which either prompt us or hold us back for various reasons. What may prompt me may not prompt somebody else, what may hold me back may not hold them back, etc.

            This case is very emotional, especially when you can see yourself or your children in similar circumstances and how it may have played out in your or their lives. As sad as it is, it is a great opportunity to gain more insight and with any luck begin, or continue, to turn some things around. Part of that is simply the raising of awareness and opportunities to have conversations around it. This case, for some people, will be a place to start.

          2. Joa says:

            Oh AV, how good I got here !!!

            I know, it’s horrible, but so comforting that someone has had the same experience (sorry 😊).

            I have too followed cases of rape and murder in the vicinity of “my” narcissist. I also tracked the years back. Yes, this cat and mouse game. Shown and obscured. Suggested but not said. “My” narcissist rides a lot in the woods. For example, he showed me a photo of an old man walking in the middle of the forest, or a little girl riding a horse – with the caption “This is the view in front of me”.
            Apparently nothing … but after a few previous half-words, something…

            I remember that already 17 years ago, after 5 months of relationship, he said: “I could kill someone without any problems.” I was shocked, but laughed in disbelief and asked, “Sure, even a woman or a child?” And he: “I said, it was no problem.”

            Besides, it was not the only thing that he suggested with his metaphors and understatements. Also other horrible things, that I’d been wondering about, what he meant and making me want to vomit and my heart in my throat. I was shaking (he loves to make it happen, although he never saw it). I don’t even want to write about it so that it doesn’t come back. I’ve already worked it out and pushed it out. Then I ended up here on the HG blog and understood it.

            Or he sent a picture of himself by sending a kiss. He has such an innocent face of a young boy (looks 10 years younger). And after half an hour, he sent his second photo of himself. An old man with the murderer’s blank eyes, like one of the toughest cases in a prison cell. Terrible.

            When I fly into space too much with emotions, I look at this photo to disgust him.

            He very often works like a pendulum.

            Up – down – up – down – up – down. Silence. Near – far – near – far. Silence.

            I don’t really know if he would be able to kill, or maybe he has already killed, or maybe it’s just lies? I know it was during our six-month financial negotiations and it was very foggy and very fast. His pace of thought, writing, and use of the pendulum was impressive. I answer one thing, trying to find my way in the chaos, and during this time he has 5 things and is still waiting and complaining, why I am writing so slowly and that he is bored. Robot. Machine. Fast. Pressure. Fast. Several nights in a row…

            Blood drops to worry about him. Card and white powder on the table. There was a lot, lot of it. Fast and perfect.

            “Prove to you that what you see is not what you see? And what you hear is not what you hear? ” He liked the game. And yes. He proved it to me many times, though I was sure.

            I think it was a fog, but… I can’t be sure. It’s too comfortable to risk losing the facade, but if it were at the bottom valle…

            I am only certain of a few of his illegal activities. Sam provided me with evidence. This is precisely what cannot be called into question. His confidence, that I will not do anything about, it is amazing.
            But yes. Hes right. On my part, he is safe…

            If he falls down, it is his fault.

          3. A Victor says:

            Joa, I am so sorry that you have had those thoughts also. It makes us so uneasy, just how they like us to be.

            I only saw my ex become his dangerous side in person one time. He took me to a pool tournament that he was not participating in, that in itself was odd. Then he left me with a couple of his friends. I didn’t know where he’d gone but then I caught sight of him a few tables away and I saw a new person come out of him, right into the face of a tournament participant, it was so frightening. I was scared for the other guy, and it happened right in front of all the people there, no one noticed, whatever was said was only between those two. The other guy went white, my ex backed away and returned to himself. A few minutes later he was back by my side and we left. I’m sure the purpose in going was because he knew that person would be there and there was some business he had to attend to. I’m also sure now that it was nefarious business of some kind. It was during our marriage, early on, when I thought all was normal in my husband’s world. I was incorrect. He thought it was very wonderful that I’d seen this person, he was most proud of it. I have never forgotten it. That person never came out at me, not even in the worst of times, the worst arguments, never. It was a whole different level of my ex. I am glad it never came out at me. I hope you stay safe Joa. What we get from them is not worth endangering our lives or our kid’s lives.

      3. BC30 says:

        It’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt. It’s all well and good when we discuss it in the abstract. This is why I keep insisting that narcs are not cats or toddlers. They have agency and choose their behaviors.

        1. A Victor says:

          Ah BC30, that does explain what you mean when you say that, I had not understood completely. I mean, no, they are not cats or toddlers, I understood that, but also, they have agency and make choices, this I was not connecting. It’s confusing because it is instinctive, the narcissism “tells” them what to do, but, they actually do it, so are they accountable? Of course. But, it does muddle it. Your comment is helpful, thank you.

      4. NarcAngel says:


        “Toward the end of my time living with my ex I had begun to wonder if he was involved in murders and rapes around the area and the fires that happened in town. Looking back with regard to this case, those thoughts are terrifying.”

        Is that a serious consideration or were you being tongue-in-cheek?

        1. A Victor says:

          It seriously crossed my mind on a number of occasions toward the end, probably the last 3-5 years. I even got so I would watch the news and try to put together where he was, which I had to take his word for, and the timing of things. But, as with the cheating, there was never anything definitive, just my gut feeling. There also wasn’t any real way to pursue it further and I wasn’t proud of thinking such things, so it was easy to stick my head back in the sand, as I did with the cheating.

          I recently watched a Ted Bundy movie with Zac Efron Jr. His girlfriend (wife?) called the FBI and put him on their list. That was chilling for me to see. I don’t know if I could’ve done it, more out of fear than morality. Morality wise it wouldn’t have been a question.

    2. Asp Emp says:

      WC, yes, I found these videos difficult too. They are so valuable in real terms, so I appreciated them in that respect.

      Your words “Gabby never got out”…..she was so young too.

      1. WhoCares says:

        “she was so young too.”

        Way too young, Asp Emp.

        1. Asp Emp says:

          Yes, she was. I have to admit that I had reflected on what I was like at that age myself. It seems to me that as the years went by, so did more of my ‘innocence’ if you can understand what I mean.

  9. Chihuahuamum says:

    Great analysis HG!
    I do wonder if there was more to this arguement than meets the eye. She seems to use the ocd and various things to cover up the real reason possibly. I know its been reported the other two women who were killed weren’t related to this, but im still not fully convinced. Maybe Gabby knew about it if he had killed them. There’s just too much coincidences the locations and that they were in the same store and camping in the same area. He strikes me as a loner and psychopath. He lived alone for 3 months in the appalachian mountains. He hated that she had a good friend and was likable by many from her vlog. He has a lot of pent up rage. I’d not be surprised if he had killed the other 2 girls. Maybe Gabby was a witness to this. Its purely speculation of course.
    I find it hard to conceive he would fly into a rage and kill her because he had been pulled over already by the police and they already witnessed this history between them, which would make him a huge suspect. I think he had to kill her because she knew too much if he had killed the other 2 women.
    The hitch hiking fiasco i think was to create confusion and a possible alibi for later.
    She definitely has been conditioned to be the “problem” and comes across in deep emotional physical stress. Just her pose is one of pain and turmoil. I think this van life scenerio is one of the worst to be in with a narcissist. He had her isolated and really got into her head!

  10. A Victor says:

    This is so hard to watch. So hard. Watching through tears. It hits way too close to home.

  11. susano says:

    HG, at the bottom of this page, it doesn’t have thumbnails that link to parts 2,3 & 4 of this analysis. I used the thumbnail that pops up over the Youtube video. It should link on this page, as well, so the traffic comes here.

    That was a great analysis and I’m disgusted with myself for not having “seen” it when I first watched the video. In trying to be objective with an innocent-until-proven-guilty eye and knowing how there’s a common narrative of men are predators and women are always victims, I took what was said at face value. I just bought the “OCD” thing, noticed how relaxed he was and chalked it up to nothing more than a minor spat. At the same time, I was struck by how vulnerable Gabby seemed but pushed that observation out of the way in trying to be what I thought was fair. You have really opened my eyes, here.

    Something else I noticed was Gabby’s body language (which I also dismissed, before). When she bent over and rubbed her thighs, that was a primal protection position. When under extreme stress and/or physical threat, our psoas muscle (connects spine to pelvis) contracts so we bend over to protect our vulnerable “soft underbelly”, sometimes even curling up in ball. If gabby didn’t have PTSD, she was on her way to it.

    Another thing, where you pointed out Brian’s smiles at his unconscious gaining of control: when he told the cops he didn’t have a phone and if he and Gabby had taken walks in different directions he would have been “on his own”, he gave a big smile. Another subconscious verbal and body language tell. IOW, he wanted to be on his own. Gabby’s girlfriend said Brian lived for months, alone, in the wilderness of the Appalachian mountains and he would sit alone and apart when the three of them went to the beach. This is a guy who likes to be alone. Gabby’s blogging, fussing over making the van a nice space and all of the couple stuff were, no doubt, just shit that got in the way of what HE wanted to do, which was experience remote and wild places, away from human contact.

    All of this begs the question of the nature of his narcissism. He certainly has strong traits but it seems there are other things going on. Unlike a typical narc, he didn’t seem to relish attention. He seems more like one of the personality disorders schizotypal (?) – there are two with “schizo” in them (using the US DSM categories, here) which are REALLY strange and where they all have kinds of creepy shit going on their heads while appearing normal. I’m thinking that along strong narc traits and, possibly, more. What do you think?

    Whatever the case, Gabby Petito seemed like the kind of girl anyone would want as a friend or daughter. Sweet, naive, excited about exploring the world around her and innocent. Those are such refreshing qualities in a world full of sleaze. So, HG, were this your daughter, how would you nurture and protect those characteristics and, teach her to beware without becoming a completely suspicious cynic?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I do not have children, so it is irrelevant.

    2. Violetta says:

      Somewhere, HG has said that if he did have kids, he’d rather they were Narcissists, so they could fend for themselves.

      1. Joa says:

        Vieletta, thank you for this information.

        I was wondering about this some time ago. In the context of personal matters.

  12. lickemtomorrow says:

    I’m sickened watching this at the thought of what happened to her afterwards. She’s obviously distressed, been reported as the victim of domestic violence, and yet presents like many victims do as though she is the one at fault. It’s so disheartening. I appreciate this more thorough breakdown and look forward to more. One body language guy has already called him out as a narcissist, too.

    Needless to say, the hope is that he is caught very very soon, or that the crocs got him already.

  13. mollyb5 says:

    HG ..some people feel he even changed her posts on Instagram and rewrote a couple of the posts and wrote totally different than she normally does. One can tell by how negative the post is ..about campers using plastic etc . It wasn’t her style to do that.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I see there is force in this suggestion.

  14. Asp Emp says:

    Reading your descriptions of her blaming herself for the “behaviours” and the ‘OCD’ reminded me of occasions where I had ‘blamed’ myself as such in relation to ‘interactions’ with that Lesser. I never did this at the start of the ‘ensnarement’, it was after the project moved to set up it’s own company – that is when all the s*it really ‘kicked’ in. This would have been around 4 to 5 years into the “relationship”. The main difference? He was ‘boss’ of the company whereas before, he was ‘boss’ of the project but not the organisation at the time.

    I do not think I actually left that ‘mode’ of blaming myself after that until I was discarded by another & worse organisation to work for….hmm, a victim of blaming myself for a 12 year period. A very long time.

    That Lesser also used “No-one wants you here”, “Nobody likes you”. For a moment, the sense of paranoia set in until I asked a colleague if it was true and I was assured that it was not. A higher-up at the other work-place used similar to me. It is absolutely destroying words to tell someone who is an ACON.

    Hmmm…..”you don’t answer our telephone call”….another manager gave me a formal warning for that, issued through by the then personnel manager!! Maybe, just maybe, I have ‘identified’ yet another narcissist. FFS. This town has so many of them!!

    Thanks to HG, I will never do that to myself again. I also will not permit anyone else to do that to me again, either.

  15. Asp Emp says:

    Firstly, your suggestion for donations to the Angel Assistance Fund is a wonderful idea. Your work on these videos is really valuable and I am reading them…..thank you for my opportunity to learn more about narcissism. And myself. Thanks, HG.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      It is, although it is quite clear that a lot of people do the talking when it comes to assisting others and the same people are the ones who actually do the assisting.

      1. Asp Emp says:

        I agree. Thank you, HG.

      2. leelasfuelstinks says:

        Okay, I also take the opportunity to say a huge big fat THANK YOU to you, H.G. Without you I would never ever have learned so much about narcissists, my family dynamics and myself! H.G., YOU ROCK! 💖❤✌

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Indeed I do and you are welcome.

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