Poll : “Dick Pics” – Your Experience




The advent of sending pictures by mobile telephone and then social media resulted in a proliferation of one particular phenomenon, the “dick pic”. Whether it is an in your face, up close and throbbing , picture of an erect male member or a more relaxed pose demonstrating this fellow is a shower and may also be a grower, there is evidence of the sending of such pictures all over the internet.

And it is not just the men.

There are plenty of women who have sent pictures of themselves naked, either with a hand cupped coquettishly over themselves providing a sneak of what lies underneath, a confident pose in front of a mirror, a shot from behind with skirt hitched up or a no holds barred legs apart shot.

The sending of such pictures and the behaviour of the recipient provide interesting insights into the dynamic of narcissist and victim.

This poll is seeking information about your own experiences and will be the basis of a future article concerning this behaviour within the narcissistic dynamic.

Please see the options below and you may answer as many as are applicable.

Do expand with your observations in the comments section.

Thank you for participating.

Your Experience Concerning "Dick Pics"

View Results

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1,050 thoughts on “Poll : “Dick Pics” – Your Experience

  1. Sweetest Perfection says:

    “Like.” I have to do my likes manually now. Refrain from the easy joke.

  2. njfilly says:

    Violetta: Sometimes I just prefer the cash.

  3. Dorion says:

    Haha, same here. I found Vaknin a long time ago but could only take him in small doses, and not very often. The wife was interesting in the documentary called I, Psychopath though – pretty much the same roles and conclusions as HG’s about narcs vs. empaths, except there was no indication that she was truly fed up, very hurt, and would want to leave him, even though the abuse factor was clearly there. I am sure it’s a recurring issue in their relationship though (if they are still together, I don’t know). I don’t think the lack of his ability to sustain our attention is simply related to his being cerebral – I’ve encountered quite a few interesting cerebrals in my life (mostly via work and my own such interests) and wouldn’t say they are generally boring.

    One thing that can bother me though, and lose my attention, is if someone has no or little sense of the artistic/aesthetic factors of their image and presentation, including expressing themselves (and complex ideas) in elegant, clear, engaging ways. I think it is related to certain cognitive structures and preferences some people have (or don’t have) more than narcissism, or type of narcissism. I am inclined to believe those cognitive styles and preferences come first and might be the basis of what cadre of narcissism someone ends up in, rather than the other way around – their narcissism is built upon other personality factors, life experiences/influences. Can’t prove this of course but it makes a lot of sense to me. Including from the observation that, while exploring Vaknin, it never occurred to me once that I should consciously moderate it for myself and watch out how much and in which ways I engage, simply because quickly sensed I could never get hooked on his stuff and use it as distraction. With HG’s work, that’s been on my radar from start because I know what I am drawn to and why. And this has nothing to do with being an empath or type of empath, at least in my case, because I am not one. More a preference for what sort of thinking and image, quality standards, strategies etc are appealing, whether it comes from being a narc, empath, normal or anything.

    I don’t know if Vaknin has sent dic pics (or would do it) to his targets, but my imagination suggests they probably wouldn’t come in a context and style that would even be mildly appealing to me. They can be interesting, for me it all depends on context, the individual, and our relationship.

    1. Sweetest Perfection says:

      Dorion, I don’t think SV cares about Pantone’s color of the year.

      1. HG Tudor says:

        Neither do I.

      2. Lorelei says:

        One of us should try phone sex with Sam.

        1. MB says:

          I’d volunteer Lorelei, but I fear I’d kill him. He will be the one needing a defibrillator!

          1. Lorelei says:

            I think I’ll ask him for a hand job and hear about he describes in detail “30 degrees to the right..”

          2. Sweetest Perfection says:

            Hahaha Lorelei! That’s funny.

  4. Violetta says:

    Njfilly: I prefer the barter system.

  5. Violetta says:

    Speaking of voices, any chance we can get HG to record Keats’ “Eve of St. Agnes” before the actual eve (Jan 20, for a Jan 21st feast day)?

    To sweeten the deal, this could be a learning experience as well as literary. I used to think it was totally hot and romantic (synthesthetics, rejoice: even the food is seductive), but one of the study guides in a course packet our students got asked, “Do you think Porphyro took Madeline to the Southern Moors he mentioned and they stayed together, or did he abandon her after they left her family’s stronghold?”

    I thought, “What a stupid question! Why would he chance having her family puncture him with enough holes to make him a human cheese grater, just so he could bang her and desert her in the snow? What kind of an eejit would risk his life for someone he didn’t even want long-term?”

    And we all know the answer to that….

  6. njfilly says:


    Ha ha! Time to raise your prices.

  7. K says:

    Hahahaha….good point!

  8. Desirée says:

    Thank you Lorelei! I really appreciate that wrist pic in a non-weird, purely aesthetical manner. Also, very nice bracelet.

    1. Lorelei says:

      Oh anytime! I love bracelets. This is a silpada item that is currently on their site. I normally take jewelry off at the gym but it’s a lobster claw clasp so a little cumbersome compared to slip ons. I usually wear two bracelets on the right wrist and an Apple Watch on the left. I’ll think of another avatar for later. My shoes are boring right now.

    2. Lorelei says:

      And Desiree—guess who I’m synchronized with for four straight hours starting right now..(??) Hint—he eats peaches. Haha

  9. Renarde says:


    We have clearly watched different athletics.

    Mind you ’84 LA Olympics were an absolute Corker!

    When Thompson won gold, he whistled the National Anthem. David Icke was still a sports presenter then, branded him ‘unpatriotic’

    Listen Dave, he was whistling because Tessa Sanderson would be handling ‘The Javelin’ later on that night.

    And whom can blame him?

    Lovely Tessa.

  10. Violetta says:

    Lorelei: how is it grosser to have a willy in your hand than in your mouth?

  11. Witch says:

    Haha Lorelei,
    You can say how you feel with me, I won’t email HG or accuse you of being a somatic middle Mid-Range narcissist

    1. Lorelei says:

      Accuse me of being a somatic lower lesser!

  12. alexissmith2016 says:

    Strong forearms are very important Lorelei! Not to be underestimated at all.

  13. Desirée says:

    I will say your profile pic looks oddly phallic-shaped today and it’s making me uncomfortable. Can we get a picture of your hand and forearm instead? Or that ginger cat you got

    1. Lorelei says:

      Just for you dear. Just for you. I’m on the elliptical and paused for a photo shoot of my wrist.

  14. Lorelei says:

    I think so Alexis. It’s not the hands, it’s the forearms though. I think I’m weird.

  15. Lorelei says:

    Nice Alexis! Alexis the DLS!

  16. Lorelei says:

    Witch—I think I have to keep my mouth shut on this one.

  17. alexissmith2016 says:

    Hahaha I am attention seeking. i can’t deny this at all. But I definitely don’t want to be known as a DLS!

  18. Desirée says:

    “There has to be utility”
    That’s quite specific, I don’t think I ever noticed forearms that much but I do like nice hands.
    Would an image of a hand holding leatherbound books of classic literature be the cerebrals version of a dick pic, then?

    1. NarcAngel says:

      Re: Cerebral dick pics being a hand and book.
      Lets hope, because grooming probably isn’t top of list.

  19. Witch says:

    I’d rather give the hand job…
    No actually I wouldn’t want to do either.
    Blow jobs are tedious to me, and it wrecks my jaw after 10 seconds if they have a big D. A small D is better for BJ’s as it’s over pretty quickly.
    But overall It’s a no from meand I wouldn’t do it again. I dated a guy who had no interest in receiving a BJ and I felt so relieved

    1. Sweetest Perfection says:

      Witch, quoting narcissist Samantha Jones, “they don’t call it a job for nothing.”

      1. Witch says:

        @sweetest, Exactly! but sometimes it’s not even a job it’s an assault and for any guy judging me right now, try putting a toothbrush or banana down your throat and to try looking sexy while you’re doing it and let me know how that works out for you

  20. Alexissmith2016 says:

    Lorelei Hahahah love that and do pleased I’m not the only one. I’ve had to share my screen a fair bit and have a number of HGs articles saved along the top bar (I forget what you call it) because WP don’t always send notifications. The one people always hone in on is ‘Dirty little secret’. It always gets a reaction and I do the same as you. I must remove it!

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You love the reaction you big flirt!

  21. Violetta says:

    SP: I loved the ’90s…..flannel, hip-hop, and grunge. Strong economy. Animaniacs and Tiny Toons. Pre 9/11. Cleaned-up NY subway.

  22. Violetta says:

    Njfilly: and to think I’ve been known to give them for free….

  23. Violetta says:

    In no particular order:

    Hair. Lucius Malfoy/Thranduil length, or at least Severus Snape. And facial stubble.


    Legs. Physical grace. Not just fighting or dancing, but the way he moves around. Powerful without being muscle-bound, graceful without being prissy. Like a tiger. Paul Newman has a speech in The Hustler that describes what I mean.

    Smell on the back of his neck. (This one is a deal-breaker, whatever else he has.)

  24. Desirée says:

    “I like forearm pics”
    …? Is that code for something, is it a hint? Are you trying to get HG to give it up?

    1. Lorelei says:

      No Desiree—I don’t view HG in that manner. I do like a man’s arms though. Absolutely. It’s the arms.

      1. Sweetest Perfection says:

        When I like someone I don’t know what it is that I liked. I’m having a déjà vu as I think I have commented this before. I don’t know if it is the arms or the abs or the eyes or the voice or the mouth. It’s a je ne sais quoi. And even after being so romantic, then I get dick pics…

        1. Lorelei says:

          No it’s a new post. I always like strong’ish looking arms. It’s all for being tossed around and having furniture items moved though. There has to be utility.

  25. Notme! says:

    My ex Narc frequently called me ‘depraved lite’ as I could have no idea of how dark his mind was. Of course I didn’t know then that his projection onto me as a slightly depraved, seedy object was as erroneous as my treatment of him as a decent, loving person.

  26. njfilly says:

    Who would do it for $10? A hand job was $80 in the 1990’s. (I happen to know).

  27. Sweetest Perfection says:

    It’s him and his dick having a good time, njfilly. The mentality is “omg I can’t believe how hot I am, I so wanna fuck myself.”

    1. SMH says:

      Haha SP. Just scrolling through the comments and yours made me laugh. So true. I found Vaknin before HG and V is all about the “auto-stimulation.”

      1. Sweetest Perfection says:

        SMH, I’m not surprised, desperate times call for desperate measures.

        1. Kim e says:

          SP & SMH
          I also found SV before HG. I struggled to stay awake while watching him as I found him so monotone and boring. What really caught my attention was when is wife would appear in video’s. What the heck was the point of that?

          1. HG Tudor says:

            Giving her something to do and of course, control.

          2. MB says:

            Last time I knew, his wife was gone. Just another traitorous woman that cheated on him from what he said. We know the real story!

          3. Sweetest Perfection says:

            MB, I seriously have trouble understanding why would any woman want to be with him. Call me a somatic empath if you will, but seriously… if you don’t have good looks and have an awful personality disorder, what’s left???

          4. MB says:

            SP, I realize I’m in the minority, but I actually find SV aesthetically pleasing. (All else aside that is.)

          5. Sweetest Perfection says:

            I value clean teeth.

          6. MB says:

            SP, I like his salt and pepper hair and his dark complexion. The bushy eyebrows are a bit extreme, but I have seen a study that proved Narcissists have bushy eyebrows! 🤣🤣

          7. HG Tudor says:

            Mine are not.

          8. MB says:

            I am 100% sure your grooming is immaculate, Sir and we’ve been informed that your eyebrows are arched. I can only imagine the hair coming out of SVs ears and I’m not even going to think about any other manscaping!

            I was making reference to a ridiculous study that was done a couple of years ago in Canada I think about the link between narcissism and bushy eyebrows.

          9. NarcAngel says:

            Pay no attention to Canadian studies. We’re all high AF.

          10. Sweetest Perfection says:

            My narc’s are not.

          11. MB says:

            I think it was a flawed study. Not to mention a useless one. And to think somebody funded that bullshit!

          12. HG Tudor says:

            I shit thee nay!

          13. MB says:

            Haha. My new favorite saying!

          14. NarcAngel says:

            You find SV’s looks pleasing?

            Well bless your little cotton socks and empathic heart, but it’s time for an eye exam.

          15. MB says:

            NA, my eyes do need sorting out! I have an appointment next week 🤓

            I don’t find him unattractive though. I’ll give another opinion after I see the eye dr! Haha

          16. HG Tudor says:

            My left testicle is better looking

          17. MB says:

            I’ll take your word for it, HG. I’ve never seen a good looking testicle. Admittedly, I’ve not seen many and certainly haven’t seen SV’s!

          18. Sweetest Perfection says:

            MB, re: left testicle. I’m sure it’s not as bushy as SV’s eyebrows.

          19. Lorelei says:

            A bushy testicle!!

          20. Sweetest Perfection says:

            NA, seriously. My narc is a Greek god compared to SV. Don’t say it too loud, though, he already believes he is…

          21. Sweetest Perfection says:

            “Giving her something to do” hahaha! It reminds me all the times my narc quoted his wife’s words on social media as if she were a big authority in any intellectual matter (she’s not) which so obviously was his way to make her believe she was in control. Little does she know she’s so disposable and he was running auditions.

          22. SMH says:

            Kim e, I read SV rather than watched/listened to him. I don’t even think I was very much aware of YouTube just a few short years ago! I still hardly use it – even for HG. I much prefer to read. I found SV’s stuff very useful up to a point. Where it falls short to my mind is in its generalizations and the clinical way the material is presented, which is perhaps also why it did not hold your attention. SV also does not analyze the day-to-day ‘ordinary’ stuff that HG analyzes and therefore SV did not convince me that MRN was a narc. HG nailed it in the first post that I read. When you know, you know (as well as go)!

    2. Violetta says:

      I’m too sexy for my blog posts
      Too sexy for my blog posts
      The way I’m sharing wisdom….

      Is SV worth checking out just for comparison or a cheap laugh?

      1. MB says:

        Violetta, SV is nothing like HG at all! He has zero charm. I followed him on IG until I asked him a question and he mocked me. He will never be popular due to his douchebaggyness. He is extremely intelligent and knows what he is, but lacks relatability. HG is a much better communicator. (and less bushy and smells good too)

        1. HG Tudor says:

          And has a far better voice.

          1. MB says:

            The superior voice goes without saying. There’s no voice I enjoy more.

      2. NarcAngel says:

        Checking out SV if you have trouble with insomnia could be beneficial. Don’t listen too long though, and have a defibrillator near by in case you flatline like I did.

      3. Sweetest Perfection says:

        He’s not stupid but he’s reaaallyyyyy zzzzzzzzzz
        Oh! What happened? Oops, I dozed off talking about SV. I can’t help it.

  28. Sweetest Perfection says:

    According to the size, it seems to be the other way around. But yeah, he’s just a dick.

  29. Lorelei says:

    I like forearm pics.

  30. Sweetest Perfection says:

    A hand job? Do people still do those?

    1. Lorelei says:

      I bet they do it for $10!

    2. Violetta says:

      SP: it’s an important component of Outercourse.

      1. Sweetest Perfection says:

        I find it so 1990’s… probably because I stopped being requested that after turning 30. Blowjobs yes, but hand jobs? Not anymore. Oh well, different people like different things…

        1. Lorelei says:

          I’d feel much better about a blow job than a hand job. Blow jobs strangely seem intimate—hand jobs feel cheap? I still want to know what manual sex is that was a surprise because if I’ll do oral why not manual?

        2. NarcAngel says:

          A hand job? Tell him to go ask his mom if she’s finished washing his cum sock and use that. What am I? A charity?

    3. Claire says:

      Yep! I like playing with the joystick during the warming up😉, to feel its… ahem, sturdiness.
      The owners like it as well.

      1. HG Tudor says:

        So long as you don’t think you are playing Daley Thompson´s Decathalon, they will like it.

        1. Claire says:

          Haha, no:)!

  31. Sweetest Perfection says:

    I would dump him as my trainer, that dude is a bastard. I would rather train with my somatic narc who at least doesn’t make fun of people’s appearances despite having a perfect physique -since he just cares about fuel-. And telling you is enough to spit in his eye.

  32. Lorelei says:

    I’m Happy!

  33. njfilly says:

    You are funny.

  34. njfilly says:

    Only if I enjoyed it.

  35. Lorelei says:

    Sweetest—this is so inappropriate but I can’t help it. My work out guy told me he slept with a really overweight girl because he always wanted to. I almost died. How awful is it to tell me this and how was I to react? He is totally not a narcissist either. I don’t get it. I feel like I should feel bad for her because he has zero intention forward. It’s kinda just awful. And then he said it wasn’t bad and I nearly died.

  36. njfilly says:

    I’ve never received a “dick video”. For some reason now I feel deprived.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Whereas if you had received one you’d be depraved.

      1. Lorelei says:

        I mean even a hand job kinda feels gross to me—I’m not doing it. A video is out of the question. Deprived and not depraved.

      2. Sweetest Perfection says:

        More like depressed.

    2. Sweetest Perfection says:

      You want one? I have a few … hey, remember mine is somatic and a mirror provides many possibilities.

      1. njfilly says:

        You have some you could spare? I can’t imagine the mentality of a man who would record a video of his dick in the mirror. What was it doing that was worthy of recording?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Being attached to a narcissist

          1. njfilly says:

            Ha Ha!

  37. Lorelei says:

    Oh my Sweetest! I’m
    more baffled that she talks to this many men who share them. (??)
    Where is she finding these douche bags? In such quantity.. I see male genitalia constantly so it’s not a turn on—I’m more of a blow job eyes closed kinda girl. Why would I want to stare at it? Yuck.

    1. Violetta says:

      Lorelei: wait, you’ll do oral but not manual?

      1. Lorelei says:

        What is manual? Yes I do engage in oral sex. Sorry for the bad visual. Haha, is manual a new thing?

        1. Violetta says:

          You said hand jobs are gross.

          1. Lorelei says:

            Yes sorry—they do disgust me.

  38. Lorelei says:

    The videos would put me over the edge!

  39. Violetta says:

    Sweet P: Iċ þē þancie.

    1. Sweetest Perfection says:


      1. Lorelei says:

        Ah Sweetest—she (and I adore her) even wanted to go to a plastic surgeon with me today. She only knew as she made the referral—can I have some privacy and not look at some idiot’s penis today?! No and no.

  40. Lorelei says:

    Violetta—a close girlfriend sent me another “dick pic” today. Sent to her by some man. I have been increasingly irritated looking at these. I don’t want it sent to me. I’d be repulsed by a dating prospect doing this. I felt my disgust could be safely expressed under “Dick Pics.”

    1. NarcAngel says:

      Have you expressed your disgust of having them shared with you to your friend who sends them?

      1. Lorelei says:

        NA—I was reflecting on this. Initially it was, “Well surely there won’t be more of these..” (like statistically how many men are sending her these to even come my way) Well it appears all and many. Wide and far. So, each time I think it has to be it. I want to say no more but we talk about everything so it seems odd to set this limit. Is there “limit setting etiquette?!”

        1. NarcAngel says:

          Yes. The limit is when someone voices that they find the subject or behaviour uncomfortable. It doesn’t have to be rude. You can say something like: I’m quite liberal, but surprised to find that viewing those bother me, so I’d prefer not to see them thanks.

          1. Lorelei says:

            Thank you NA. Very good statement to use. It just felt unusual to have this be an issue because we have very open conversations. But I do find such photos as disgusting and I’m far from a prude. I just find it vulgar is all.

          2. K says:

            I am not a prude either but I don’t think that I would enjoy dic pics/videos at all. Thankfully, I have never received any.

          3. Lorelei says:

            Thanks K! I would be furious over a video. But I respect others are into it. I would actually even do a semi-nude classy photo for a partner—truly. Tainted Love by Soft Cell is the song for the day by the way!

          4. K says:

            Each to their own; it’s important not to be judgmental and I don’t mind nudity in art or sculpture. I love Tainted Love BTW.

          5. Lorelei says:

            K—I love nude sculptures and semi-nude paintings. My bathroom and bedroom have a few items. Yes, different people enjoy different things.

          6. K says:

            Nude sculptures and semi-nude paintings are beautiful and art museums are places of wonder and respite.

          7. Lorelei says:

            Agree—even the du monde is attractive as the body shape is feminine etc.

          8. Sweetest Perfection says:

            And of narc seduction. Sigh… you know, I don’t miss the dick pics or the sexting. I miss going to the museums with that dude with the MOFO mutation. Alas.

          9. Lorelei says:

            HG & K—So I call university tech support and they remote to my laptop.. I open my email while he is logged in and “Dick pics” notifications are populated heavily in full view of “Austin” the support guy. I’m so ridiculous. Embarrassing. I just acted like nothing was amiss.

          10. HG Tudor says:

            I hear they have seen far worse on your laptop previously.

          11. Lorelei says:

            Only I have stuff like that happen. Dick pics by subscription..

          12. K says:

            Hahahahaha…thanks for the laugh! The look on Austin’s face must have been priceless.

          13. Lorelei says:

            I was embarrassed K. It is funny though!

          14. Sweetest Perfection says:

            I love Georgia O’Keeffe by the way; and “L’Origin du Monde.”

          15. K says:

            Sweetest Perfection
            Oh, I know about “L’Origin du Monde”; Scandalous! And I have books about Georgia O’Keeffe and many other artists. Art and artists are amazing and Starry Night by Degas is one of my favorites.

          16. Sweetest Perfection says:

            K, Starry Night is a Van Gogh and also the background of the cover of one of my favorite movies ever, Midnight in Paris. I visited the O’Keeffe exhibit two years ago in London and then in the US and it was spectacular.

          17. K says:

            Sweetest Perfection
            Oops! I mixed up my artists. Van Gogh, Seurat, Grandma Moses, Rockwell, Lichtenstein and Warhol are some of my favorites, as well as, furniture designer Eames and I like the Emeco 1006 Navy Chair.

          18. Sweetest Perfection says:

            K, my husband and I were a Lichtenstein couple one year for Halloween, that took a lot of polka dot make up! After a night of dancing and drinking it was all a mess haha.

          19. K says:

            Sweetest Perfection
            Hahaha…did you cover yourselves in Ben Day dots!

            Ai Weiwei is defiant and french graffiti artist, JR, is provocative and a narcissist introduced me to the work of Pollock 5 years ago. Photography, architecture, origami and bridges are other mediums that I really enjoy.

          20. Sweetest Perfection says:

            I love Pollock despite the fact I’m not really into expressionism. I am an aesthete anyway so I enjoy art in multiple forms, not just visual. But one thing I’ve never been attracted to is furniture. I see it too functional to be adored, and if it was built to be adored then it’s not functional.

          21. K says:

            Sweetest Perfection
            Pollack is great (I suspect he was a narcissist) and I like The Scream by Munch. A friend of mine purchased a bookcase which led me to designers Eames, Emeco and Nelson and ever since then I love good quality furniture. Although functional, it’s beautiful to look at!

          22. Sweetest Perfection says:

            K, The Albertina Museum in Vienna has a permanent Munch exhibit which includes the first original version of The Scream. I visited it in 2016, the title is “Edward Munch Love, Death, and Loneliness.” It was a very gloomy exhibit, you can feel the angst and depression of some paintings.

          23. K says:

            Sweetest Perfection
            Many artists have “blue periods” and it shows in their work and it’s depressing. In The Scream, I wondered if he was terrified, insane or did he leave something cooking on the stove: “Oh, shit! My hamburger helper must be burnt to a crisp!”

            Photography is another medium that I really enjoy.

          24. Sweetest Perfection says:

            Also, I wanna like everybody’s comments but WP hates me.

          25. Lorelei says:

            The woman with the towel around her waist is above my bed. Is that still my WP “site” photo? Anyway it used to be.

          26. K says:

            Your current gravatar is a pink shoe with a bow.

          27. MB says:

            So I’ve been MIA lately, but I just want to know one thing. Has Rudolph been captured yet?!? Y’all are obsessed with dick pics and meanwhile there’s a fugitive on the loose! If Rudolph is on another thread, I apologize. I’m so lost these days!

          28. K says:

            Shhhhh…Rudolph’s on the lam.

          29. Mercy says:

            That’s a good way to phrase it NA. Not rude at all. If the friend continues to send them, she’s the one being rude.

          30. Violetta says:

            MB: Thanks to the diversion created by Megs and Haz, Rudolph’s trail has gone cold.

            OTOH, Meghan was seen wearing some kind of pelt.

          31. MB says:

            Violetta, MM certainly has taken the spotlight. She will need that Rudolph pelt in Canada!

          32. Lorelei says:

            MB–we are talking dick pics not Rudolph. He went back to Santa land a few weeks ago and its time to talk about the phallus as an instrument of artistry in photographs.

          33. MB says:

            Lorelei, I have no interest in the pics. Don’t show me baby, do me! Ha ha

          34. Lorelei says:

            Well get to it! I think it’s common for narcissists to ask people to crawl to them in the bedroom. Wouldn’t you think? That’s another long story.

          35. MB says:

            Mine always said he’d crawl slowly to me so I could anticipate. (No doubt wanting to drink deep of my fuel)
            So many narc flavors, so little fucks to give.

          36. Lorelei says:

            This crawling crap is ridiculous.

          37. MB says:

            I found everything about him super sexy, such was my extreme addiction. Don’t get my ET going, I’ve spent too much money on Assistance Packages to fail now!

          38. HG Tudor says:

            Investing in your Future Self is never too much,MB!

          39. MB says:

            I can’t be undoing all your good work by thinking sexy narc thoughts though!

          40. Lorelei says:

            MB—I’m actually single and I took myself off the no fun program HG offers. I can’t state the length of it—I got in trouble last time. But I think it’s ok to be naughty—just not with aliens in human body suits.

          41. MB says:

            Lorelei, I’m almost one year no contact with AW! I’m giving myself a pat on the back. 😊

          42. HG Tudor says:

            Well done.

          43. MB says:

            Thank you, HG. You’ve been a major part of my success.

          44. HG Tudor says:

            I agree.

          45. Lorelei says:

            Good job! I refuse to answer my ex via text/call—he can only email re, the kids. They are disgusting.

        2. Sweetest Perfection says:

          Lorelei, when I started receiving mine I remember I tried to share with a very good friend of mine. She saw the first one and said “gross.” Then I mentioned the videos and she told me: “If you show me the fucking vídeos I’ll have to kill you.” Good friends have no restrain.

          1. K says:

            Sweetest Perfection
            Correct; good friends tell it like it is. No namby-pamby sugarcoating.

          2. Sweetest Perfection says:

            K, my friends at least are like that. Though I have other friends that would actually enjoy classifying the dick pics and naming them: “mushroom,” “shar-pei,” “little worm,” etc. Where there’s variety, there’s fun. Lorelei, maybe if your friend doesn’t stop sharing you should adopt the latter attitude? Make a contest?

          3. K says:

            Sweetest Perfection
            exactly, tell it like it is; it saves time. Hey, if narcissists are sending dic pics, get creative!

          4. Lorelei says:

            Hi K! It’s just hard to say, “Oh, we can talk about whether we do this or that in bed but..” (get all snobby about pics)
            It repulses me to my core. It’s funny because you know how I can say tons of out there stuff. I just have firm No’s.

          5. K says:

            I agree; there’s something inherently different about discussing sex with close friends than receiving dic pics/videos but I am not snobby about it and there’s nothing wrong if people enjoy dic pics, Playboy, Penthouse or panty sniffing.

  41. Sweetest Perfection says:

    Violetta, good luck. I really hope you get a campus visit. Try to keep busy this week so that you don’t climb the walls waiting for that call, though. Remember you are good at what you do, if it doesn’t happen it wasn’t meant to be, a better place will come out. It always does. Gōde wyrde! Much “Feoh” to you (why don’t we have runes in the emojis????)

  42. MB says:

    Rehashing the hash is so 2019. This is a new year. Let’s make some new memories y’all!

    1. Getting There says:

      Happy New Year, MB!
      I hope you had a great holiday season!

    2. WhoCares says:


      “I have no interest in the pics. Don’t show me baby, do me! Ha ha”

      This is the wrong spot, but I dare not put “dick pics” in *any* search box to find the right one…just want to say:


      1. MB says:

        WC, I’m snarky today! I don’t get many chances to comment, so I gotta make an impact when I do.

        1. Sweetest Perfection says:

          It seems to me you are a woman of audio stimulation rather than visual stimulation from what you told us here, MB. My synesthesia approves.

          1. MB says:

            Yep SP. If he whispers in my ear and breathes on my neck, I’m a goner!

          2. Sweetest Perfection says:

            But how was he gonna breath in your neck through the phone!

          3. MB says:

            My imagination is extremely powerful.

  43. Renarde says:

    Talking to my male kink scene friend the other day about PE and narcissism. In his opinion, a lot of the males on the scene are ‘vagina hunters’. Not really interested in kink in itselfs’ sake but just to get laid

    I think it would be an oxymoron to say there are not any women who are sex curious or kink curious (and of course they are not mutually exclusive) in the scene but both areas do form part of the physical human experience. But yeah essentially, a lot are men who it really is, ‘any hole is a goal’. And bottom line, they percieve a better chance of success in kink because women are curious and a liability to themselves.

    In my experience, ones that spend time on the big kink boards are less likely to send unsolicited dics. This is the realm of the vanilla such as OKC and POF.

    Either way, now talling to a female nilla who was sent one. Understandably angry. Then it gets bizarre. She states then she has nothing against it but reckons some women get off on it. Unsolicited ones I mean.

    Nah, never met one and I never expect to. It’s technically a sex crime and should be treated as such. Just as flashing is.

  44. DoForLuv says:

    He was a lesser somatic so off course ! and I was a LDE so I had to see all angles I guess and his at gym shots too 🤣 Snapchat

  45. Violetta says:

    This post as of now has 483 comments.

    The Thread That Must Not Be Named has 1,380 Comments.

    C’mon, we can do better than that. We are better than that.

    1. Sweetest Perfection says:

      “I like dick pics and I cannot lie” … just contributing!

      1. Violetta says:

        You other sisters can’t deny
        That when you get
        A close-up courgette
        A thick one in your feed …

      2. njfilly says:

        Very funny!

    2. njfilly says:

      What is “The Thread That Must Not Be Named”? I would like to read it.

      1. WhoCares says:



        You may want a snack and/or fav drink at hand before proceeding.

        1. njfilly says:


          Thank you for posting this. I have my reading for the night now.

          1. WhoCares says:


            No problem.

        2. K says:

          Liquor WhoCares, a shot of Jack, anything to numb the senses from the senselessness of that thread.

          1. WhoCares says:

            Haha K, passing around shots would have made that thread much more fun – and possibly shorter! Not sure about the rest of you but you would have soon found me under the table, therefore, my contributions would have been nil!

          2. K says:

            Hahahaha…exactly, because we would have passed out and forgotten the whole thing, like being roofied. There is a silver lining to alcohol!

          3. Lorelei says:

            It was pivotal in me understanding that we ONLY have ourselves truly to rely on. Others (even many) will be supportive but don’t depend on anyone but yourself. It also lavishly illustrates the ability or inability to apply gains (or not) made here—the ability to apply the work.

          4. K says:

            You can rely on WhoCares to pass around the shots! What’s your poison?

          5. WhoCares says:

            I say we down a shot, dedicating 2019 to the tenacity of Empaths and then smash the glass.

          6. K says:

            Hahahahah….start passing around the shots!!!

          7. Mercy says:

            I’m in if there’s shots involved!! Im not reading that 5 hour thread again though. How about a shot for Dick Pics?

          8. K says:

            Here’s to dick pics and a Happy New Year!!!

          9. Mercy says:

            Cheers to dick pics it is K, and hopes that’ll I’ll see a real dick again in 2020!!?? HaPpY NeW YeAr!!!!

          10. K says:

            Cheers Mercy
            Hahahaha…I see real dicks everyday. HaPpY NeW YeAr, Mercy!!!

          11. njfilly says:

            Well, I see my work here is done.

            I asked about “The Thread That Must Not Be Named”, gained an understanding as to “why” and causing it to continue here.

            I am a trouble maker sometimes.

          12. K says:

            Hahahaha…you big trouble maker!

            Violetta made a humorous remark about the thread, you were interested in reading it and WhoCares was kind enough to provide the link. The way I see it, you weren’t causing any trouble at all.

          13. njfilly says:


            Thanks. I was joking anyway. If I caused any trouble with it, I don’t care. I’m surprised, however, that it continues.

          14. K says:

            My pleasure njfilly
            Hahaha…I had a feeling you were kidding and you didn’t cause any trouble at all, from my POV. As for its continuation, I wasn’t surprised. It’s a New Year and a new day, so here’s to moving forward.

          15. njfilly says:

            Happy New Year K!

          16. Violetta says:

            It’s all my fault.

            I was just trying to encourage dicks.

            That never works well, with me.

          17. K says:

            Hahahaha… troublemaker! When I read your comment, the adage: be careful what you wish for, came to mind.

        3. MommyPino says:

          I thought that we’re moving on?

          1. Lorelei says:

            Yeah—move on. Have a nice day somewhere else if you don’t want to read this. Another reader brought it up and posted a link. (Not me)

          2. MommyPino says:

            I was talking to WhoCares not you. But damn, you never get tired of pity plays Lorelei. And you’re so skilled at it that these people don’t even realize it. “ It was pivotal in me understanding that we ONLY have ourselves truly to rely on. Others (even many) will be supportive but don’t depend on anyone but yourself. ”. Boohoo! You had so many people attack Julia for you, you didn’t have to do a damn thing. And you think you relied on yourself?

          3. MommyPino says:

            Lorelei, I don’t respect you. I don’t respect you for texting me a threat to have your attorney send a Cease and Desist letter to me when I didn’t do anything wrong or illegal. I don’t respect you for telling me that I am a friend that you will keep forever and then watching someone viciously attack me here when you know my situation and not caring. I don‘t respect you for for texting me a link to your conversation with that person who attacked me here and implying to me that you stood up to her against her behavior here like towards me knowing that I would start to read that thread only to laud her with flattery the next day. So yes, don’t blame me for unfriending you and blocking you. You may not be an NPD but you were toxic to me so yes, good bye and you can drink the shots with people who have no clue. Have a nice life. I was just here to point out more hypocrisy. I’m unsubscribing and yes I will have a nice day.

          4. Lorelei says:

            You are passive aggressive. Period. “I didn’t think she was a self aware narcissist..” Demoted to less than a greater with a flash of your key stroke. Let me exceedingly clear MP—the majority called you out for being whiny and still sore over K. I had nothing to do with you and K and deep down you know it. You projected something onto me that I’ve no ownership of. You’ve said on here you have problems keeping friends. I can see why. Assigning the worst label you can think of when there are perceived slights is a start. It’s transparency is glaring to more than it is not. I’ve ignored your posts. I will continue to do so after this one to politely spare new readers of the bullshit that was not spared in the prior thread. I am not a narcissist. Am I a bitch? Am I crazy? Do I have 100 things wrong? Maybe—and it’s not one damn bit your business. Take a hike and F off.

          5. MommyPino says:

            “ the majority called you out for being whiny and still sore over K”

            Straw man argument and a lie.

            I have seen so many posts of you whining about Julia calling you a narcissist in many different ways and forms. So stop projecting yourself to me. You even attacked HG for thinking that he slighted you because he praised some commenters and you perceived that he excluded you.

            “ You’ve said on here you have problems keeping friends.”

            I never said that. I don’t have a problem keeping friends. I have friends from grade school. I said that my friendships with narcissists always end. And can you blame me? You have posted here yourself that you have been getting rid of narcissist friends in your life.

            I’m ignoring your posts from here on out. But you are a liar and you can fuck off yourself.

          6. Mercy says:

            “Do I have 100 things wrong? Maybe”. Correction, you got 99 problems but MP ain’t one!
            Sorry, couldn’t help myself

          7. K says:

            Hahahaha…that was good.

          8. Lorelei says:

            Don’t throw snowballs bigger than what you can take back MP. Your fight was yours with K—it didn’t concern me. You just told on yourself—you got mad because I didn’t care. (Your perception—you never asked)
            Take care of yourself. Now I said I wasn’t going to reply—this is IT. You are no intellectual match for K or I—that may be grandiose but it is true. Don’t respect me—respect yourself. I know you won’t unsubscribe because you can’t stand it. Your ET is too high not to look.

          9. Whitney says:

            Mommypino you are a beautiful, genuine, straight-talking, and intelligent empath. I’m here for you my Geyser ENFP. If I hurt someone deeply, and they told me, I would tell them I was so sorry. BUT I would NEVER in the first place nitpick over trivialities…and persist after hearing someone’s mother just died. WTF. I’ve never seen anything so robotic, controlling, pathetic, and lacking of empathy, MP. Of course you’d feel resentful.
            I’m disgusted 🤢 I’m sorry that happened to you… I’ve said it before but I must say it again. It would hurt deeply, and everlasting. I’m not over it! It’s not whining. That “hahahaha” ganging up laughing made me sick 🤮
            Love you MP 💝 You remind me of all my friends who are beautiful empaths like you.

          10. mommypino says:

            Thank you Whitney. I totally agree with everything that you have said. Don’t worry about me though as I was able to move on from that. I am not sore about it at all. The thing that made me ask a simple question to WhoCares is my annoyance that some of them are FRAMING history for the newcomers. When someone says, “ Liquor WhoCares, a shot of Jack, anything to numb the senses from the senselessness of that thread.” Anyone with common sense can tell that it was not an innocent remark. She was obviously not referring to her part in it. She was obviously referring to me and others who were in the opposite side of the debate. Why on earth would they bring this up again if they truly want to move on. HG has told me to move on and follow his instructions and has told me that K will heed his instructions as well. I have been ignoring some passive aggressive remarks that I have seen in several articles in this blog and comments made in reference to that thread or alluding that some commenters who post here and blend in are narcissists. I have been ignoring K and L continuing to post in my comment that they highjacked at the Narcissist Always Judges thread which I have unsubscribed from but I see them posting them through the recent posts part of the blog all the time. I have seen Mercy’s remark in the Rules of KTN article questioning commenters like me who stood up for Julie and also L’s pity play which I have ignored. But it just never ends does it. They have to keep mentioning it and framing it to the newcomers and conditioning newcomers and hopefully recruit more bullies. Readers can identify passive aggressive remarks. And readers can see which commenters are enjoying this conflict and enjoying the power play.

            And I’m not at all competing to be the most intelligent commenter at Narcsite. There are different kinds of intelligence and I’m not at all insecure with mine. I don’t need to impress anyone with highfaluting words because I don’t need to prove anything. I’m perfectly happy with who I am including my imperfections which I know I can always work on. And I know as a fellow NFP Whitney, you will agree with me that we all have different gifts, talents, skills etc. and that everyone is more intelligent than someone at something.

            Thank you again Whitney. You are so amazingly kind and beautiful to me and I really appreciate it. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

          11. Mercy says:

            MommyPino, One thing I can never be accused of is being passive aggressive. I say what I mean and if I’m proven wrong, I will own up to it. My comment on The Rules was sincere. Lorelei got pounded on for a week and everyone that sided with Julie has said at one time or another that they don’t think Lorelei is a narcissist. So let me ask you this, why did you side with Julie if you do not think Lorelei is a narcissist? I perceive it as a passive aggressive attempt to bully Lorelei and put the blame on Julie. Not because you agree with Julie’s statement that Lorelei is a narcissist, but because you don’t like Lorelei. I absolutely meant what I said about hoping people that sided with Julie could see the damage they caused to Lorelei. Her “pity play” in my opinion was someone who was genuinely hurt and suffering from a week of reading post attacking her character. Stop making this about you. “Odd” is not your thread, you came into the convo 5 days after it started and aggressively put yourself out there. You talk about “framing” the situation for newcomers but I can assure you that new people just don’t care enough about our petty differences. As a matter of fact, I didn’t even know about what happened between you and K until YOU brought light to the situation. I was too busy in narcland to take notice. So in my opinion, your excuse about new people doesn’t hold water. I see it as another passive aggressive attempt to make Lorelei and K look bad.

          12. mommypino says:

            Mercy, I’m not interested in making this go on but I would like to correct your inaccurate assumptions/statements.

            “ One thing I can never be accused of is being passive aggressive.”

            I never accused you of being passive aggressive. Read my comment again.

            “ So let me ask you this, why did you side with Julie if you do not think Lorelei is a narcissist? I perceive it as a passive aggressive attempt to bully Lorelei …”

            I have never been a bully in my entire life. Why would I all of a sudden start to bully now after 38 yrs. You are making a big leap of assumption towards me and the people who backed Julie up. I said that I don’t think that she is NPD which is based on what I think was her ED result based on what L said. I defended Julie not to bully L but to defend Julie because I saw that she was being ganged up on and I see that some of her observations as valid that a lot of L’s behaviors are narcissistic and I can understand why Julie arrived at that conclusion. But I am leaving an allowance of benefit of the doubt that maybe L is just highly narcissistic and also I was relying on the ED result relying that L is telling the truth about it. You can accept my explanation or not, I couldn’t care less. You cannot invalidate what I have experienced based on your perception which is biased because K and L are your friends here and L even paid for half of your Empath Detector. You cannot invalidate what Whitney saw as well.m and tell her that she and I both just imagined K’s behavior or that we are just making it up to make K look bad. So just like before let’s just agree to disagree and end this pointless arguing.

          13. mommypino says:

            Lastly Mercy,

            “ I say what I mean and if I’m proven wrong, I will own up to it. ”

            I highly doubt that. You dismiss the truth if it doesn’t go with your side. Just like you dismissed Whitney’s testimony. Thank God for people like Whitney who bring voice to the truth so that abusers cannot gaslight as much as they want. I don’t care if you think I’m passive aggressive because your thoughts are not facts and you are here only to defend L obviously. You have no idea what transpired between me and L privately. I guess if you think that defending Julie is passive aggressive bullying you can understand why I felt betrayed by L’s continuous flattery and praising of K after K abused me while Lorelei was supposed to be my friend. I didn’t expect her to argue with K, I just wished that she told K that she knows that I’m not a liar and a manipulator and to at least pacify K. But instead she was conveniently quiet and then praised K on other threads and even sent me a link to a thread where she would laud K. Why would a real friend do that? So Mercy, it’s fine that you believe all of that. I happen to have a different perspective and experience. You’re not the one who experienced what I experienced and you have no right to tell me that my experiences were not valid. I wouldn’t be surprised if there would be more passive aggressive crass remarks directed to me by the commenters who enjoy bullying. Abusers make people feel bad for holding their truth and force them to move on or stop breathing life to it while still provoking them. If you want someone to stop answering back then maybe stop attacking the person. I just asked WhoCares a question based on what HG said that we should move on. Lorelei escalated it with her response to me. I don’t care if you’re direct or passive aggressive or not. I honestly don’t care what you are. But don’t pretend that you care about the truth when you really don’t.

          14. mommypino says:

            Anyway, Mercy this is boring so I will not look at whatever response you or others in your group throw at me. You are entitled to your own perception on me as I am entitled to my opinions about you and aggressive involvement in this. I have already clarified what I have to. I’m not interested in bullying anyone and you have no proof of me bullying anybody here. I have no interest in making anybody look bad. I have shared my experience in the Odd thread to show a comparison with how Julie was being excessively attacked compared to how the other person is being excused and enabled. I didn’t make anything up, it’s all documented here. So if you think that pointing out the truth is making someone look bad, then Mercy you have a big issue because your concern is more about protecting a facade of an abuser. Other than that I don’t want to say more. I told HG that I will not bring the Ed thread up again, I did not. Lorelei did. Stop using the Ed thread on me every time you want to invalidate what I was trying to say. If I can move on I’m sure you guys have that capacity too.

          15. Mercy says:

            MommyPino, I appreciate and accept your explanation. We are all allowed our opinions and we don’t have to agree. In all honesty, it’s probably not my business to question you, but I feel protective of Lorelei because of what she experienced. Like I said in my previous comment, she witnessed her character being attacked for several days. Yes, she had alot of support but it’s still not easy to watch something like that. My biggest problem with the Odd thread wasn’t Julie, none of her comments were credible from the beginning in my opinion. My problem was that you and others here who sided with Julie’s opinion couldn’t offer an explanation of why. I respect someone who takes a stand, but back it up with a logical explanation. When you came into the conversation, you immediately referenced the altercation with K and asked why people would would take her side and not Julie’s. To me, that’s not a logical explanation, its an emotional reaction which is why you lost credibility with me. I’m not saying I’m right, I’m just explaining my perception.

            Your comment about you not being a bully is noted. I’m going to reference one of your comments “They have to keep mentioning it and framing it to the newcomers and conditioning newcomers and hopefully recruit more bullies” Also a big leap of assumption, wouldn’t you agree?

            As far as friends, Lorelei and I had hardly talked before the odd thread and I’ve just recently gotten to know her and her story better. The gift she gave me was the most thoughtful gift I received during the holidays. I can’t express how much it meant to me so please don’t diminish it by insinuating I only side with her because I am her and K’s friend. Also, I have never mentioned Whitney’s name so I don’t know where that came from. I actually respect Whitney for being there for you. You two have connected so it’s only natural that she would be there to support you. Last, if you don’t want to talk to me stop saying my name and referencing my comments in order to back up your opinion of the situation. I’m like Beetlejuice, if you say my name I’ll pop up.

          16. SMH says:

            Haha Mercy. Like Beetlejuice! MP has very high ET always (not a criticism of you, MP – just an observation). I think everything she writes needs to be seen in that light. She once jumped to conclusions about me too and then denied it. I had to point her back to where she had said it and also show her the lack of evidence. I also think MP and L had something off site that has contributed to MP’s ET regarding L and maybe by extension, you and the rest of us who defended L.

          17. Mercy says:

            SMH, I caught the off-site comments which I assume is why emotions are high between them and also is the perfect example of why HG strongly discourages it. It makes me wonder if MP would have a little more empathy toward Lorelei of the off-site stuff didn’t happen.

          18. SMH says:

            Me too, Mercy. I wonder. And it is a very good reminder about why we should not meet off site. Even with the best of intentions, shit happens.

          19. Kim e says:

            Well now what the hell do I do with this ticket I bought to NYC???❤️😂🥃
            (JK HG)

          20. SMH says:

            Kim e, we’d have so much fun!! Imagine the two of us out on the town! ❤️ In all seriousness, I once tried to meet up with K while I was in Beantown but HG would not put the comment with the info through. He does read everything!

          21. Mercy says:

            Well the rest of your comment must have been in moderation when I replied to your first one. I can’t leave it sitting there.

            “You dismiss the truth if it doesn’t go with your side.” Which side is that? The imaginary clique side? Have you noticed it’s just me and you talking. I’m capable of having an independent opinion.

            “Just like you dismissed Whitney’s testimony.” Am I being triangulated? I don’t remember having a conversation with Whitney or saying her name or dismissing anything she said. Could you please clarify? I also find it odd that you see her earlier comment as a “testimony” as if she’s trying to sell or talk up a product. She is being emotionally supportive, she’s not selling you. The mentioning of Whitney’s name in this conversation is very strange to me.

            “You have no idea what transpired between me and L privately.” Nope I don’t, but I think it’s disrespectful to HG that you keep bringing up off-site stuff.

            “I guess if you think that defending Julie is passive aggressive bullying you can understand why I felt betrayed by L’s continuous flattery and praising of K after K abused me while Lorelei was supposed to be my friend.” So is this the real reason you defended Julie? Paybacks? Or did this flattery of K happen after the ODD thread, in which case Lorelei is returning the favor since you so openly praised Julie after she called your friend a dangerous narcissist.

            “Anyway, Mercy this is boring” No you just want the last word and don’t want me to respond.

            “so I will not look at whatever response you or others in your group throw at me” again with the imaginary clique and you’ve already said once you’re not going to respond, but you do.

            “Stop using the Ed thread on me every time you want to invalidate what I was trying to say” Stop using the Ed thread to validate everything you say.

            ” If I can move on I’m sure you guys have that capacity too.”
            I’ll quote Lorelei on this one. “Yeah—move on. Have a nice day somewhere else if you don’t want to read this.”

          22. Violetta says:

            Speaking of New York, has anyone heard from Princess Super Empath? Just hoping she’s okay.

          23. MB says:

            I’ve noticed PSE missing as well Violetta. She’s probably just busy!

          24. Sweetest Perfection says:

            I miss Joanne.

          25. mommypino says:

            I miss Joanne too, SP.

          26. K says:

            Violetta and MB
            I am not sure if you have seen her comments but she is posting.

            PrincessSuperEmpath says:
            January 8, 2020 at 18:06
            Dearest HG: Thank you! I will work to put my very long list together. Fascinating!


          27. Whitney says:

            Mercy, sorry I check comments manually so I just saw your comment!
            I just want to say that I hadn’t interacted with MommyPino before I first spoke about the abuse she suffered from K- the MMR Cerebral. So I wasn’t supporting Mommypino because we had previously connected. I did it because I needed to point out the truth.

      2. Lorelei says:

        The short version is that I’m a dangerous self aware manipulating narcissist. Initially proclaimed by an angelic genius super empath with wings of golden feathers avid reader. That will save you a few hours!

        1. Desirée says:

          That is the gist of it, really. I think windstorm said she read through the whole thing and it took her five hours.

          1. MommyPino says:

            Wrong, Julia didn’t think even for one second that Lorelei is a self aware narcissist.

          2. Lorelei says:

            I just read your post about more river swimming. I have swam against a current yes but damn—twice a week! Can I just do the elliptical at the gym and feel ok?! 💕

        2. Desirée says:

          High intensity is much more effective though…and the cold water is both invigorating and cleansing. You can stay on the elliptical if you want to but I promise ice swimming is fun! Also, we’re no strangers to getting thrown into cold water anyways haha

          1. NarcAngel says:

            Jesus. You must go through a lot of swimsuits, what with your nipples ripping them to shreds and all.

          2. Lorelei says:

            Agree about the cold water—but I like the elliptical and the men have the weights out in full view!

          3. Desirée says:

            There’s an image…like ripping a shirt apart? But instead my glass-cutting nipples do all the work while I stand there panting, hands on my hips, water dripping from my hair still.

            Honestly though, it’s great fun and if an 80yo swedish couple can go to a frozen lake and take a dip repeatedly, so can all of us: https://visitsweden.com/winter-bathers/

          4. NarcAngel says:

            Well you think it’s good because they’re still alive. if they were being fished out of the lake like pickled herring after having had a stroke – different story. I did think it was sweet how he described the warm feeling between his legs after having her cardiac buns.

            Go old people.

          5. Lorelei says:

            Desirée—do a lot of people swim in the cold in Sweden? The link won’t open. My friends just returned after a two week Swedish extravaganza but I’ve never been there. I would go in cold water while in Sweden because if I’m there I may as well if other people seem to think it’s a good idea! I envision a ski lodge and a hot tub more than a lake though—although hot tubs make me think of dirt and disease and I have to know it was bleached. I’m really weird for working in a disease factory.

          6. Desirée says:

            You actually just made me read the article again to see if he spoke about a warm feeling spreading from between his legs. God am I credulous.
            Don’t ruin this for me NA!! I am going to go ice swimming in Sweden next spring and if I don’t show up on the blog again afterwards…well, you know where to look for me I guess.

          7. Desirée says:

            Yes ice swimming is considered a tradition in Sweden although to be fair, none of my friends ever want to go with me and those are born and bred swedish people. It is said to have countless health benefits but I mostly want to do it because I love swimming and I think swimming in cold water feels fantastic. Also, because I want to see if I could do it and live. There’s also a practice where you have a nice sauna set up, then run out to go skinny dipping in the lake, go back into the sauna, you get the idea.

          8. NarcAngel says:

            I did that once. Pool to hot tub (I agree with human bacterial frappe as per Kramer on Seinfeld), and repeat. Alcohol was involved. Never mind narcs and blackmail – I have some concern those photos will surface…

            Oh well.

        3. njfilly says:

          Ha Ha!! Yes I read for about an hour, got the general idea of the thread, then had to abandon ship. I couldn’t handle any more. I’m not even sure how and why it kept going.

          I did see the genius super empath you are referring to. Other than calling you a narcissist, she had a couple good points, as did other commenters, but I didn’t read the entire thread.

          It did bring up several questions for me, however. I see that Mr. HG Tudor confirmed you are not a narcissist. Personally, I wouldn’t care anyway, but, are narcissists not allowed to comment here? What is the difference anyway if somebody where to be a narcissist? Also, what danger could they pose here on an internet blog?

          Further, I think the banter unrelated to narcissism is not only necessary, but very helpful. I don’t see it as lessening the gravity of people’s pain. It increases the camaraderie. It makes some conversations more lively and light. I think it would be worse and unnatural to not have any cheerfulness on this or other blogs. That might exacerbate people’s struggle and make them hopeless that they might never feel happiness again. In general, I’m not a fan of stifling any natural expression of emotion, within reason. Even funerals contain happy moments during the celebrations of the life lived. Why should it be so solemn and serious here all the time? That didn’t make any sense to me. If it were very solemn here I probably would have left already. (Just kidding! I would still be here to learn more from and about the enigmatic Mr. HG Tudor, who has won my loyalty).

          Beware the danger of The Lorelei!

          1. Lorelei says:

            SMH—I saw your comment and as usual can’t reply to you directly but assume you are subscribed. (I’m going to spend a bit of time with the happiness engineers to get this WP crap ironed out!)
            Thank you. It’s all ok, I’m just thinking a toast to moving forward in 2020 and striving for more narcissism is the way to go! I’m actively looking at HG’s list of narcissism traits and wishing to expand my opportunities.
            Or should I improve my existing narcissistic traits since they exist and may just need honed up a bit? It would be more flavorful to spruce up what’s there. Like adding a new sparkly necklace to an old little black dress!
            And I never recall seeing HG suggesting he could not comment based on confidentiality. It appeared he promoted the initial comment by supporting the initiator (from how the thread read to me—granted it branches quite a bit) and basically I’m staying off of here next birthday time. The entire shit show was sadly and unnecessarily diverted into several miserable directions. I won’t even comment on the directions. Ri-DIC-ulous in dick pics.
            And a good comment was made—why can’t a narcissist comment freely here? If HG doesn’t want the comment to go through it won’t. Like are they going to jump through the app and come after you like a Chucky doll?
            My eyes are rolling into my head.

          2. HG Tudor says:

            1. I did not state it at the time because as I have explained previously, I was not in a position to comment at all because I was away. This was evidenced by several days of no comment from me during that period.
            2. Once I was able to comment, I explained that I then did not comment one way or the other, owing to confidentiality provisions.
            3. I did not promote the initial comment at all, there is no evidence to support that and indeed, as people have stated many times and which you repeatedly keep failing to recognise, is that I was supportive of you. What I did was encourage that individual to contribute to the blog, I did not encourage that person to comment in the way that she did.

            I have stated this as such to correct inaccuracy. The revisiting of this by several individuals is unhelpful and unnecessary and will not be countenanced further.

          3. Lorelei says:

            Thank you. I just saw this as was almost missed at the bottom of my WP notifications. I am exceedingly frayed. I am sorry this was a pain in the ass but it seemed to branch off into directions of nonsense that even I didn’t have any hand in. Clearly I am emotive and projecting in other directions somewhat. An irritant grew and then catapulted somewhat.

        4. Lorelei says:

          I hate WP in these older threads. Sometimes I can reply/sometimes not where it is supposed to fit. For SMH and Mercy et al.. Thank you. Listen, I’m extremely weary of this. Extremely. Yes, there was majority support and I recognized it—still do. Off blog relationships are often a bad idea. When I got here I was absorbing a small ratio of anything, much less sound suggestions. Frankly, and to be honest—it could have happened anyway. This is mainly the result of not feeling backed up by a “friend”—someone could perceive banter here with regular people as friends so hurt feelings can occur here as well. I don’t dislike MP. I think she is often quite lovely, a good mother, kind. Honestly. I have limited concern about the initial view of me, or being highly narcissistic or a sadistic killer or a wretched whore. Or a who knows what. My upset toward HG in that threat that MP referenced was because he knew he had done an empath detector and didn’t comment re, the banter. Whatever. Maybe because I act like a dumbass he felt I needed the feedback or whatever else. I just wish this banter would end at some point, although, telling MP to F off was probably counter-intuitive to ending it. She’s also very bright—the smart ass intelligent comment was related to eventually applying the work correctly (done here) and nothing more. The one thing that needs said is that NPD is not a thing to say unless an expert perhaps. I have patients come in—they may look like a stroke, walk like a stroke and guess what. It may be a migraine headache. It’s a moment in time. HG has said the aggregate of behaviors is how he determines NPD, and I assume this aggregate encompasses a period of time and not just a view of limited behaviors. (Not one day or even six months). It is absurd to imply all of my comments are narcissistic. I assume they are taken quite seriously by others at times as a result of “this” but I still suggest flippant comments about one another here are best tossed around as maybe less invoking of sustained drama. (Call me a slut or a bitch—I’m much more ok with this as is not a terminal emotional condition) Of course I have narcissistic traits. I wish I had more. A lot more. Whatever. Maybe I’ll take notes and see which traits I want to develop. Who knows. I’ll apprise of my progress. Have a lovely day.

          1. HG Tudor says:

            As explained previously, confidentiality provisions prevented me.

          2. Alexissmith2016 says:

            I think HG didn’t reply because he enjoys the ‘bitch offs’ hahaha

            I don’t really read them, only the odd comment I accidentally stumble on so I don’t really know who thinks who is what. It’s all a bit much for my tiny brain when so many people get involved.

            I am intrigued as to your empath detector results Loreili. I definitely believe you are an empath.

          3. HG Tudor says:

            Actually, I do not. The “bitch-offs” as you describe them, are not about me, therefore the low potency, low amounts of fuel provided are not directed to me and therefore useless to me. They have some value with regards to understanding more about behaviour and it is about allowing people to articulate their views, as I have explained in detail elsewhere. I do not, however, enjoy them.

          4. SMH says:

            Lorelei, Sorry to bring it up again and to sort of talk about you behind your back, even if it was to defend you. I agree that NPD is not something to throw around lightly. FWIW I don’t see a hint of NPD in you. Let’s hope the ‘banter’ and speculation end here.

    3. Lorelei says:

      I don’t know that thread Violetta! Haha, haven’t been there in awhile!

  46. Jules says:

    Between raving, Tinder, BDSM and living within a 5 mile radius of 20,000 college boys, I feel like I might be up to a lot more mischief than most here haha. But I’ve only ever sent unsolicited photos to one person ever. And when my friend asked why I’d done it, my answer was, “Because He shouldn’t have to ask.”

  47. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:

    I admit I do like when they write my name or initials on their dick…..😂🤷🏻‍♀️🤣

    1. HG Tudor says:

      The Shieldmaiden´s initials are LAASMOLNNII

      1. candacemarie says:

        Stop it HG, you’re hilarious 😂

      2. NotMe! says:

        You fibber!

      3. Liza says:

        is shield maiden a group of people? i can’t see what kinde of name has LAASMOLNNII as initials

        1. Liza says:

          no need to aswer i got it now, so i will go out silently, bay bay

      4. Kim e says:

        HG. 😂😂😂😂😂👿👿👿👿👿😂😂😂😂😂

  48. Witch says:

    Are you sure it wasn’t a crazy ex who advertised your number somewhere?

    1. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:

      I actually think it may have been. Back in June my ex who is also a Narc, borderline, sociopath psychologist most definitely posted a fake profile of me on tinder with my head chopped off and like distorted my body a smidge with an app. I wouldn’t put it past him.

      He also went into my friends cam room and was cyber stalking me in there.

      1. Witch says:

        Oh gosh! I’m sorry to hear that, that’s so creepy.
        I hope he’s backed of now?

        1. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:

          He tried to convince me to get back with him because when I found this tinder shit and cam shit I gave him one warning.

          After the warning he tried to convince me it wasn’t him and that he still loves me and how he wants us to be together again (mind you it was about a year of no contact on my part). He kept lying and it was boring and insulting so I randomly blocked him again.

          He has a new victim now. He’s been cheating on her the whole time. He’s going for low hanging fruit. No joke he has found the perfect victim who will let him control her and she is doing everything for him.

        2. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:


          What’s your story?

          Also …. is your pic from the “morning” video

          1. Witch says:

            Yes, that’s the right thing to do, block that bitch!

            I believe I was with a narcissist for 9 years. He has not tried to hoover me, stalk me or anything (thank god!) I reckon he was an elite, lower mid ranger? possibly an upper lesser?

            Then I was with another narc for 5 months, I believe he was an elite middle mid ranger. He did try and hoover me a year after I went no contact. I received an email that I didn’t even open until a year after he sent it 😆 and it said “after all this time… I still think about you.”

            I also believe my mother is a narcissist, a victim lower mid ranger.

            Yes! My avatar is from the “morning” video, I’m happy someone noticed.
            May I please call you “Harlequeen” from now on?

          2. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:


            You can call me whatever your heart desires 😁

            Sounds like you have had a rough run too. I seem to attract and am attracted to cluster b men.

            The last two were psychologists too so it was a little extra frustrating when they would attempt to try and make me think I was crazy lmao – extra insulting lmao!

            The borderline, narc, sociopath called me borderline (everyone who is a female is borderline in his mind) and the psychopathic one called me Taylor Swift and then said I was borderline (another one who no joke calls all his ex gf borderline).

            I found it fucking hilarious how after a fight of ours he just sent me the blank space video lmao 😂😂

            I found out that my ex bf wife was not in fact a borderline lmao and the same goes for the narc sociopath borderline psychologist lmao

          3. Witch says:


            I honestly have no idea what attracted me to these 2 narc males…
            The first one I didn’t even fancy, met him when I was 16 and just wanted to know what it was like to have a bf, he fancied me so I just went along with it. I stayed because he was my first and out of guilt because his father was abusive and I was somewhat of a witness to that. So I didn’t want to leave him while he was “vulnerable.”
            I was also afraid of abandonment so anytime he threatened to end the relationship I freaked out.

            I got with the second narc just because I was lonely and horny.

            I could have done much better for myself earlier on, I’m not bad looking so I should have at least gone with guys better looking and with money 😆
            but you know low self esteem, ignorance and all of that.
            Glad those days are behind me!

            I imagine that a narc who is a psychologist is quite dangerous because they would probably be better at manipulating people and better at making the other person look/feel crazy.
            The second narc, was very intelligent and articulate, so he never disrespected me by calling me bad names or anything like that, but he was very clever with his words. He was very good at making me feel crazy.

      2. Chihuahuamum says:

        Dr HQ….😱 im glad you got rid of him he sounds like a psycho…oh wait he is!! Thats scary and needs to be taken seriously. Ive read about certain stalking cases and that sounds like a hallmark of a stalker. I hope hes left you alone. Stay safe!

        1. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:

          After the psychologist from last year I got into another relationship with a psychopath like hmmm 3 months later…

          I tried that experiment I talked about a long time ago lmao and let’s just say that experiment did a huge crash and burn…

          The story is kinda nuts lmao

        2. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:

          The last two relationships I had ….

          I def had moments where I feared for my safety. You can’t show fear though.

        3. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:


          The narc, borderline, sociopath psych who bangs his clients and is a raging drug addict is worse than I imagined. He is full of like rage and shit. I found out later he has hit ex gfs. It’s a good thing that when he blew up on me in the Dominican Republic in August 2018 that I didn’t push the crazy. Something told me not to.

          Hours and hours of his drunken ranting and nastiness. It all popped off because at a Japanese restaurant he kept staring at an African American man and saying he was jacked and I said I didn’t even notice. He said it’s nice to know you haven’t done “that” before (racist comment). So I said “but I Have”. The rest of the night he was screaming and screaming and drinking and wouldn’t let me into the hotel room mind you my money, keys, passport and everything was in a safe I didn’t have the combination to. He was no joke screaming in my face.

          1. Witch says:

            Oh my gosh Harlequeen

            I’m mixed race and the first narc (in the early years) was very insecure about this and he was low key racist and would tell me that he thinks I’m going to leave him for a black guy…
            I SHOULD HAVE LEFT HIS UGLY ARSE FOR A BLACK GUY!! If I could turn back time!!!

  49. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:

    Current mood lol:


  50. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:

    I get so many dick pics it’s like absurd. I don’t even ask. The last guy who sent one to me randomly sent it and like said his armpit hit his phone and “whoops” then admitted he’d just wanted an excuse to send a picture to me.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Nothing to do with your ‘Dick Directory’ you advertise seeking submissions for Dr HQ?

      1. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:

        I mean maybe I should start to do what the cam girls do and like get paid for making fun of and rating dick lmao…

      2. Dr. Harleen Quinzel, PsyD. says:

        Interesting that you say that because a few months ago random numbers would text me asking for BDSM services and I was completely baffled lmao

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