Sex and the Narcissist

No holds barred and no strings attached

The only unnatural sex act is that which you cannot perform

Read about how the narcissist views and uses sex and how you are central in that

US e-book here

UK e-book here

CAN e-book here

AUS e-book here

Also available in paperback on Amazon

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10 thoughts on “Sex and the Narcissist”

  1. Happy Christmas and thank you for the site mr.Tudor! This might be an unusual question but do you have any thought on why a narcissist can be obsessed with some sexual masochistic fantasies? This is quite confusing because in other situations he would go mad over any slightest attempt to press on him. The only information I have found is an article about “narcissistic-masochistic character”. I would be glad to get answers and opinions from anyone who has something to say.

    1. Hello Kat,

      This will be because it is a method of exerting control and gaining fuel. I recommend you read my book ‘Sex and the Narcissist’ which will describe this and much more in greater detail for you.

  2. HG I caught the narc steering at my lips and quickly looking away when I looked at him, if you don’t like intermacy why so sexual?
    Also would narc rather wife a virgin appliance or a none which one over the other if both are good supplies.
    Would a narc stick around if you will not be sexual with him until after marriage?

    1. 1. To make you react to provide fuel.
      2. I do not understand the question.
      3. It is possible if you are dealing with a Victim Narcissist (sex is less of a matter for them) a Cerebral (same but for different reasons) or you have significant advantages to provide to the narcissist and you are bound to him and providing fuel without full sexual intercourse being necessary.

      1. He is a greater elite narc, has the cerebral and somatic nature. He is hyper sexual. But pretends to be decent to me as he is mirroring me as i am a virgin but considered very attractive lookswise. Im surprised a narc of this kind is okay with nothing sexual until marriage!? He has agreed to wait (not that i plan to marry him)
        He only holds my hand and give good bye hugs. Do elite prefer attractive virgin appliance over non virgin attractive appliance. It seems getting a virgin is really important to him or one that looks respectable in other eyes.

      2. The issue of virginity is relevant in that :-

        1. It denotes honesty an decency, a strong moral compass – empathic traits which matter to us;
        2. It promises particular fuel when you are deflowered; and
        3. It is a residual benefit – “I was the one who took her virginity” thus I am superior to all the other potential suitors.

  3. I find that picture offensive. However, it sure is a wake up call into the mind of a narcissist. I don’t wonder why I got ensnared. I just wonder why I kept going back for 5 years until it got so bad that I lost any feelings that I had for him.

  4. Sex and The Narcissist was incredible and I am still trying to wrap my head around the words and the horror. This book made the last vestiges of the golden period disappear into thin air. I was stunned by what I read and I need to read it again to give it a proper review, however, this book is a must-read for everyone here on this blog.

  5. at the begining of was nice cause we were thinking we love each other…in my case.
    later…sex was like porno the last time i hated sex with this man..even i sow his dark eyes like evil…its cost me..but i escaped..and now 5 months later i feel i born again…of course i still with him i my mind many times a day..but not like i know who and what he by love…ha ha at list free of you..

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