A Very Royal Narcissist – Part 7

Following yesterday’s announcement by The Sussexes (which is really Meghan Markle´s announcement) that they will be  stepping back from their role as “senior royals” and splitting their time between North America and UK, more information has become available which merits comment in the context of understanding the behaviour of a narcissist.

1. Whose Decision Is It Anyway?

Harry and Meghan said they made the decision “after many months of reflection and internal discussions”.

Be under no misapprehension, this decision is Meghan Markle´s and hers alone. She is the controller and everybody else must be the controlled, which naturally includes Prince Harry as her Intimate Partner Primary Source. 

Markle´s unconscious facade management paints a gloss of it being a considered and joint decision. It is not. Miss Markle has made the decision and Prince Harry has to go along with it. Whilst we are not privy to the actual “discussions” since Miss Markle is a narcissist, it is highly likely that she will have utilised the following manipulations to get his “consent”.

  • Pity Play – she will have pointed to the media dislike of her and how unfair it is and how this should be escaped by moving in part to north America and cutting ties with royal duties
  • Guilt – “do it for me”. “you want me to be happy don’t you?” , “if you want wants best for us, you would agree with me.”
  • Triangulation – “This is what would be best for Archie, you want your son to have the best start in life don’t you?”
  • Promised Gain – “It will be an equal split, we will not lose touch with your family and the UK, I know it is in an important part of your life.”
  • Future Faking – “We will definitely spend at least half of our time in the UK, I promise.”
  • Threat – “If we do not do this, I do not know how we will manage”, “If we do not get some breath space, H, who knows what it will do to us and I do not want to lose us, do you?”

Miss Markle has made the decision. Prince Harry has been manipulated into agreement. It is not agreement made with any degree of free will. Initially, he will believe it is what he wants because he remains caught up in his love for Miss Markle and like any empathic victim, he wants everything to be fine and for it all to work. Over time he will realise it is not what he wants, but of course maintain the facade of agreement, for fear of reprisal, but this is not what he wants.

2. No Good Advice

Note that the decision was purportedly made with regard to apparent reflection and internal discussions, i.e. to suggest that it is a joint decision between Miss Markle and Prince Harry. There is an absence of reference to having taken advice from other sensible sources, to having taken soundings from knowledgeable individuals, to have floated the idea with those who may be able to offer sound and wise counsel. This is no surprise and evidences the narcissistic behaviours of

  • The need for control. Taking advice from others means relinquishing control.
  • Haughtiness “I know best”
  • Sense of Entitlement – “I do what I want”
  • Grandiosity – “Nobody knows better than me.”

3. A Failure To Consult

The Royal Family are said to be “hurt” at the Duke and Duchess of Sussex’s announcement they will step back as senior royals.

Prince Harry and Meghan did not consult any senior royal before making the statement.

Marrying into the Royal Family brings privilege and also obligation. Miss Markle is naturally content to embrace the privilege and the platform but since she has no sense of accountability, her narcissism rejects the obligation that comes with this. Therefore, she decides that she can have the upside and reject the downside of becoming a royal. 

The failure to consult with the rest of the Royal Family and especially the Queen demonstrates

  • A sense of entitlement
  • A lack of accountability
  • Grandiosity
  • An absence of emotional empathy – Markle does not care how her decision makes anybody else feel, although she has cognitive empathy and therefore can layer on the gloss to make it appear as if she cares, but she does not. She always comes first in order to maintain her unstoppable need to control everything around her, although of course, this is an unconscious need and one of which she is not aware.

4. “Show Me The Money!”

They said they intend “to step back as ‘senior’ members of the Royal Family, and work to become financially independent”.

Miss Markle´s decision is essentially – “We are leaving but in the meantime we will take the pay check thank you very much.” It is akin to you saying to your employer, I am going part-time whilst I look at other options, I have not discussed this with you, but you will continue to pay me as a full time employee.

Anybody with a sense of accountability would state “Okay, we are going our own way, we cannot expect therefore to be financially supported because we are stepping back from our role as senior members of the Royal Family

This evidences the narcissistic behaviours of

  • Sense of Entitlement
  • Lack of Accountability
  • Asset Acquisition 
  • lack of emotional empathy
  • poor boundary recognition

5. Financial Hypocrisy

The statement that was released was that the Sussexes would “work to be financially independent” But what? Doesn’t Prince Harry have a substantial inheritance from his mother, financial support ins position as a Royal and moreover Miss Markle likes to remind us that she is self-made. Therefore, either she is not as financially well-off as she likes to portray (Grandiosity, Facade Management ) or could be financially independent now but will not do so and will continue to take financial support from the Royal Family (Hypocrisy, Sense of Entitlement, Lack of Emotional Empathy).

Either way, it is yet another example of Miss Markle´s narcissism at work.

6. To Isolate Is To Control

“This geographic balance will enable us to raise our son with an appreciation for the royal tradition into which he was born, while also providing our family with the space to focus on the next chapter,” the couple said.

This is just the facade being managed once again and is purely a sop to suggest that the royal connection will be upheld. What it really is, is the start of the salami slicing removal of Prince Harry from any influence which will impact on Miss Markle´s control of him. It also contains a passive aggressive dig by referring to the provision of space and once again demonstrates the sense of entitlement and lack of accountability. Miss Markle fails, because she is a narcissist, to recognise that when you enter the Royal Family, you leave your entitlement to space at the main gate. 

This statement is a manipulation through facade management and its true purpose is to deflect from Prince Harry´s systematic isolation from others better enabling Miss Markle to assert control over him as the Intimate Partner Primary Source in devaluation.

7. The Narrow Focus of Control

Those of you familiar with my work know that the vast majorities of narcissists are Lesser or Mid Range. This means they do not know what they are, cannot change and operate instinctively. It also means that the narcissist is entirely (unconsciously) focussed on control IN THE NOW and is not concerned with control last week or control in three months´time. This means that the narcissist makes decisions (unconsciously) based on asserting control NOW without due regard for collateral consequences. This invariably leads to poor collateral outcomes for many narcissists (not all) in terms of failed relationships, poor familial relationships, job issues, money problems, criminal activity and so forth.

For example, a Lesser narcissist when challenged by his foreman, may well assert control in THAT MOMENT by physically assaulting the foreman. The narcissist has gained control in that moment, which is all his narcissism wants. However, the collateral consequence is that he loses his job. Of course, at that later point, his narcissism rejects that it is his fault as he declares “The foreman provoked me” or “I never wanted to work for those arseholes anyway”. It is never the narcissists fault but this need for control and shirking accountability often leads to adverse collateral consequences. Miss Markle´s action is no different.

Her decision is apparently about seeking space and looking to the next chapter, however, this unprecedented behaviour will only stoke media comment and interest (much of which is likely be to Challenge Fuel) and therefore her actions may enable control NOW but will lead to potential control issues thereafter, but remember, her narcissism is only concerned about control in the moment, not what is coming down the line.

This issue has been already identified, albeit not in the context of narcissism, with this observation reported by BBC News

Prof Kate Williams, a royal historian, said it will be “difficult” for Harry and Meghan to lead “normal” lives, as media interest in them will increase after their “unprecedented” move.

There lies the adverse collateral consequence.

8. Fuel Me World!

Making this announcement has naturally provoked a massive media and public response. Who has provoked all of these comments, the speculation and observations? Miss Markle. Therefore every column inch, every news report, every tweet, every conversation about this matter is fuel and allows Miss Markle to feel that she is in control. Those who support her decision and state as such are providing her with Positive Fuel and reinforcing that she has control. Those who question it, query the basis for it, reject the manner in which it has been done or are otherwise critical issue Challenge Fuel. Thus there is fuel but it challenges her sense of entitlement and threatens her control. She will, of course deal with this by focussing on the fact that she is getting her way and that she has those who support her.

And what of the world and its observations about this behaviour. It has been described as unprecedented and beyond bizarre. The BBC´s Royal Correspondent has framed it as

Some might see this as the slimmed-down monarchy that the 21st Century needs.But Harry and Meghan reached people that other royals didn’t. They were part of the reinvention and refreshing of the institution.”

Once again, that misses what is actually happening here – it is narcissism in action.

One commenter got slightly closer, as reported by BBC News

“Graham Smith, a spokesman for Republic, which campaigns for an elected head of state, said Harry and Meghan’s decision “raises questions about the monarchy’s future” and will prompt taxpayers to ask how the couple’s extra security and overseas lifestyle will be funded.

Mr Smith questioned why they were announcing they were working towards being financially independent, saying: “To suggest that they’re not already financially independent is incredibly crass and belies a sense of self-entitlement and a lack of self-awareness that is common among royals.”

Mr Smith identifies the sense of entitlement and lack of self-awareness that this decision belies, albeit misses that it is narcissism at work.

The continuing behaviour of Meghan Markle provides an excellent example of a narcissist in action, although as always, the world fails to understand what is happening, pontificates about the behaviour and forms the wrong conclusions time and time again. This enables such behaviour to continue in relationships both romantic and familial, socially, in the workplace and beyond.

Only one place identifies what it actually going on and why.

This place.

Isn’t it time that you ensured more and more people realised this?

Want to know more about the saga of The Very Royal Narcissist?

Use the links below

A Very Royal Narcissist – Part 6

A Very Royal Narcissist : Part 5

A Very Royal Narcissist 4 : Aftermath and Reaction

A Very Royal Narcissist – Part 3

A Very Royal Narcissist 2

A Very Royal Narcissist

Understand more about narcissism

Fuel

Fury

Sex : How the Narcissist Views Sex and The Role It Plays In Your Entanglement

Manipulated

Decipher

The Devil´s Toolkit

Smeared

The Platinum Collection : Volume One

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186 Comments

  1. Excellent HG as always!

    Considering all of the forewarning (although sloppily conveyed as it may have been) that friends and family of Megan’s gave, do you think members of the monarchy are correlating that with what is going on now?

    1. William had concerns that his brother went into the relationship and marriage too quickly. His concerns are showing they were accurate, although he does not know what they really are and moreover actually doing something about it, at this juncture will be very difficult.

    1. We all know she’s going to ditch him, but it will be interesting to see how it plays out. I’m betting that when the offers from H’wood dry up (she couldn’t sell a fucking September issue of Vogue at reduced price, ffs: even in this age of internet fashion, that usually flies off the stands), she will reproach Harry, who by this time will be a shrivelled rind of a human, and storm out.

      Any counter-bets she’ll just do another Trevor and mail him the ring?

  2. This article was so helpful in explaining how a narcissist’s mind works and was really illuminating in a current situation I’m facing. I’m in the process of renegotiating my daughter’s visitation schedule with her father and he gave this mind-boggling counter proposal to the one I had originally offered. The sections “A Failure to Consult” and “The Narrow Focus On Control” have helped me make so much sense of the current situation. His proposal, if accepted, would mean that he would not see our daughter for almost an entire year, whereas mine would still maintain regular contact, but for shorter periods of time. It’s clear to me, based on the information presented here, that he’s not consulting anyone (despite his threats of taking me back to court over this) and he’s also not considering the future consequences of this counter proposal. He just wants to control the proposal itself. Knowing this has really helped me develop a strategy for negotiating with him in the future.

    1. Hello PMFae and welcome. I am pleased that this work, as intended has given you insight with regard to your own situation (MB, if you are reading this is what spreading the word achieves) and I would caution against believing you can negotiate with him, on the basis that he is a narcissist. You will find this very helpful

      https://narcsite.com/how-to-co-parent-with-a-narcissist/

      1. Thank you, HG. I have actually purchased the assistance package you linked as well as the narc detector. “Negotiating” was probably the wrong word for what I’m doing. It’s really more that I’ve been asking him questions via email to elaborate on his proposal and he appears to be digging his own grave, as each response just makes the proposal worse (for him). I plan to spend the weekend listening to the audio files for the co-parenting package as I await your response to the narc detector.

  3. Harry and Meghan will definitely be spending more time in NA than the UK. Due to MM desire for more, more, more, and because she has successfully isolated Harry from his family, she and Harry will then divide and conquer to further monetize their brand, spread influence and collect more fuel for MM. Harry being separated from his wife due to work, will hopefully come out of the FOG(Fear, Obligation, Guilt), even if it is painfully slow.

    My father in law(overt) and my mother in law(covert) are both narcissists. My incredible, amazing, sweet husband is sadly their scape goat. It actually took having kids for my husband to come out of the FOG and see that his parent’s behavior was odd because of how much he loves our children. We finally had to say enough to their toxic behavior about a year ago because it was affecting my husband’s physical health. I never realized it could be this bad, but a narcissist does not like being discarded. It got ugly, but thankfully and hopefully the worst is over.

    Until you have been at the mercy of a narcissist, it’s really hard to see the signs, but if you have…..they become glaringly obvious.

    This answered my long running question of why I never liked MM. In my eyes, she appeared incredibly fake. The Africa interview made me roll my eyes, that definitely felt like a performance. This newest debacle fits her well.

    She also ditched Harry to deal with this by himself because a narcissist cannot stand to be criticised, cannot accept anything less than perfect image, and absolutely will refuse to accept she is wrong about anything.

  4. She’s already gone back to Canada (Where they left the baby) and left Harry here alone to hammer out the details with his family. I suspect she wasn’t hearing what she wanted to hear after dropping the bomb and has scurried away wounded because she’s realised her actions do indeed have consequences, narcs are not known for thinking into the future. I think she knows her control is not as absolute as she thought it was and I smell imminent disengagement. I hope her absence gives the RF the opportunity to talk some sense into him, after all he has better and more experienced narcs in his life than her. They won’t let him go without a fight and aren’t immune to stooping to get their way either…

    My ex narc used to do the same; he’d cause blue murder then literally run away from the fallout: refuse to discuss what he’d done, deflect, project, blame shift and play the victim.

    Bye bye Miss Narckle. I hope the door hit you hard on your way out!

  5. Harry is going to hate living in the USA.
    HG, what would you say is the most disgusting American food that you have ever tried while staying here in the USA?
    Have you ever tried Jack In The Box tacos?

    1. I have not. That does remind me of a Mexican restaurant I ate at near Davenport in Florida. It was a major let down. Other than that I have not experienced any disgusting food in the USA, most likely because I choose well.

      1. Just admit you were at Disney World. JK. Well, the next time you decide to travel to California or Arizona, I’ll let you know where the best Mexican food is at.

        1. Daniela Soto. She owns two restaurants in NYC, Cosme and Atla; she has been named world’s best female chef. She reinvents traditional Mexican dishes, but if you really prefer traditional, I would suggest going to Mexico. It’s a huge country and the gastronomy is very varied and rich, it’s not all tacos and enchiladas. HG, would be willing to try some chapulines?

          1. Correect. Here in AZ, the mexican food is traditionally sonoran style. It’s ok. I prefer food from the Baja regioon.when I go to california, i can eat their mexican food every day and not gain a single pound.

          2. Anm—Arizona is hot as F. I’ll stay in the mid-west! I ended up in Laughlin around 5-6 years ago and I’ve never made it back! (Part of a Vegas event—we traveled south)

          3. @Lorelei, Bullhead City is like stepping one toe into AZ., the area I live in, does get hot (up to 120°F) in summers, but we also experience snow a few days a year, so it’s not always hot. I do appreciate the Midwest, so I can understand your appreciation for your home area. My mom’s family lives in the Midwest, and I actually sent my son to spend last summer there so that he could get away from the heat and experience an extended stay away from his home environment.

          4. I’ll die in 120 degree weather! Ugh—I’ll visit in February! I made some friends on a trip last year from Az!

          5. February is perfect for most of Arizona. If you plan on going to the Grand Canyon, you may catch a blizzard in February. Keep me posted!

  6. It makes me sad too WhoCares, the tell tale signs of the emotional strain and underlying unhappiness at the push and pull he must be feeling are sadly becoming evident.

    We know all too well what lies ahead for Harry.

    And not forgetting little Archie, the damage a Narc parent is capable of is utterly deplorable.

    They need a HG Intervention.

    1. Reboot & Rebuild,
      Aside from the shock-factor and the gossipy interest this newest development has caused, I also feel very sad for Harry and Archie. All of this controversy is damaging for both of them and will have lasting consequences. It’s a sad situation for any family to go through and potentially devastating for a child.

  7. From the DM: “The HRH egos have landed: That’s the devastating verdict from Diana’s private secretary PATRICK JEPHSON, who argues Harry and Meghan have let rocket-fuelled vanity triumph over duty” [emphasis added]

    Oh, if they only knew how apt their wording is.

  8. I imagine #8 is on the way, now with MM is back in Canada with Archie.

    Can you type fast enough, HG?!

    Oh, that’s right. You dictate, as a Greater would naturally do . . . .

      1. Harry’s going to need you during the divorce and custody battle.
        The Tudoristas know they are inevitable, but he doesn’t ..yet. He still thinks he can stave it off but doing everything she wants.

  9. Annndd…this is how she stands by her man:

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7870677/Prince-Harry-Meghan-Markle-left-young-Archie-Canada.html

    People are assuming she’s just a coward who left Harry to face the music, but it’s more than that. She wanted the baby safely overseas in case she had to Hoover Harry, if the BRF actually managed to talk some sense into his head. I think he’s a goner, though. Even if they turn Prince Philip on him, he’ll chalk it all up to meanness and valiantly defend his precious Megs, who left him holding the bag.

    Oh, HG, maybe you’ve taught us too well.

  10. I have a question id like to pose if anyone is interested and of course HG please reply as well if you wish…do you think this wouldve played out any differently if princess di was alive? I feel she wouldve been a mediator between harry and the royal family while supporting her son and trying to keep her two sons relationship intact.

    1. He wouldn’t have been vulnerable to this woman playing off his need for his mother. He’d have had the original.

      1. Hi violetta…do you mean he is looking for a mother figure and that void from losing his mother? I agree i think theres a lot of emotional hurt and pain from not only losing his mother but what she went thru being married to charles. The dysfunction of that marriage im sure has affected both harry and william. They were young but still witnessed so much.

    2. Yes. I think it would have played out differently if Princess Diana were alive.

      I do think Diana had some traits of Borderline Personality Disorder. This is not surprising, given her traumatic childhood. I think Diana could be extremely selfish and manipulative at times. She also genuinely loved her boys. She also genuinely loved a whole lot of others who had extreme sufferings. That is to say, she was a loving mother and a real humanitarian. She was also at times very manipulative and egocentric. She was a complicated lady.

      Had she lived, Harry would not have had the same wounds he has now. He would have had some wounds. Charles and Diana were not a healthy combination, nor were they healthy co-parents. The boys would have suffered in other ways if she’d lived. But not to the same degree or in the same way. They would have benefited from the fact that she loved them to pieces, despite her flaws.

      I think those same flaws, based in woundedness, not malice, would have helped Diana sniff out Meghan Markle from 20,0000 leagues away. I don’t think Diana would have bought Meghan’s act or sanctioned the relationship. I also think Diana’s woundedness and egocentricity would have been combustible with Meghan’s selfishness and manipulation.

      Had Harry gone so far to pick out a Meghan Markle as a serious girlfriend (debatable that he’d be drawn to her if his mom had lived), Meghan would have at some point stepped in it with Diana. Harry would then have chosen his mom over Meghan. If Meghan had tried to win him back, Diana would have beaten her at that game. Both because she had enough crazy traits to compete with Meghan’s own crazy, and also because she genuinely loved Harry for himself in a way Meghan does not.

      1. Right before the wedding, one of Diana’s little bridesmaids (all from the kindergarten class where she was a teacher) tripped and fell. Diana rushed over and crouched down to hug the sobbing child (try to picture doing that in the legendary meringue). “Did you fall on your bottom?” Diana asked. “No, I fell on my face!” Diana comforted the bridesmaid, and all was settled. The bridesmaid, now grown, still remembers her with fondness.

        Now contrast that to Meghan, who was so irritated by whatever Charlotte was doing during a fitting (probably fidgeting; she is a child, after all) that Meghan’s reaction apparently brought Catherine to tears.

        Diana may have been seriously messed up, but she was not a phony. There’s a pattern: the blank stares Meghan got from some of the kids in Africa, the way Archie didn’t seem to prefer looking at her or being held by her when they were filmed there (trust me: I worked in day care as an undergraduate, and babies usually prefer their parents by the time they’re three months. They hear that familiar voice: their eyes light up, they wave their arms and legs in the air enthusiastically; if parents put them down, their eyes follow them around the room. NONE of this has been witnessed occuring with Meghan).

        Even a dog Meghan was petting at some event couldn’t wait to get away from her. It didn’t loop its head around so she could scratch under the chin; it didn’t inch forward to have an itching rear scratched (when they trust you, they’re not subtle). It barely tolerated her show of affection.

        Animals and very young children do not know how to lie. They have not yet been taught to lie to themselves: “Oh, I’m sure so-and-so cares about me and wants what’s best for me.”

  11. Dearest HG: regarding the statement : `Mr Smith questioned why they were announcing they were working towards being financially independent, saying: “To suggest that they’re not already financially independent is incredibly crass and belies a sense of self-entitlement and a lack of self-awareness that is common among royals.”` HG, everyone needs money to survive on this planet. So, Mr Smith has missed the point.

    The Queen has more wealth on her very own, than most can hardly imagine, on behalf of her own family. I believe that Meghan and (thereby) H are saying: The more money we take from the pubic coffers, the more we can be controlled by the Monarchy and we (Meghan) want more freedom than that in our life. It is a statement about obtaining freedom from the dictates of the Monarchy, than a statement about their desire to scrape around as a couple to have enough money to buy biscuits each day, so to speak. Money is control. To accept less money from the public coffers is to have more personal control of their lives (Meghan`s life), is the message that Mr. Smith missed. Money versus Freedom is a common concept in the United States, where I live.

    And Meghan`s timing is very good in many ways. The Monarchy has survived for a long time, and sometimes they stoop to win, so to speak. Again, Meghan has good timing in seeming to stoop, because we know on Narcsite, that she is really not stooping at all, but actually looking for a route to be in control. It is actually good for the Monarchy to step back a bit after the Epstein debacle, and so once again Meghan, fortunately for herself, has good timing, even though the timing of her actions are not premeditated, but survival based, and done in the moment, `in the Now.` And I believe you. So, I agree with everything that you have assessed.

    1. The statement released by the Duke & Duchess of Sussex was loaded from beginning to end with deflections. I can’t comprehend why so many people are “taking the bait” and endlessly analyzing non-issues. Harry and Meghan do not have to work, or exert themselves, to be financially independent.

      Harry inherited half of Diana’s estate. The Queen Mother gave him more than half of her estate. Estimates vary, but what’s certain is that he has tens of millions of dollars in his pocket. That’s aside from his $50k plus yearly salary while in the military. That’s also aside from Meghan’s estimated several millions of net worth.

      They are, already, highly financially independent. It’s a non-issue. Lacing the statement with their own desire to be financially free, and adding in all sorts of details about this royal fund, and that royal source of income, was intended to send people in a tizzy analyzing it all. (It was also designed to stir the pot and try to agitate the people at large to speculate that others in the royal family are not worth their keep.)

      The Sussexes also have no control over what their own path within the monarchy will be. None. There is no path for them to forge. They will take what is given them, or they will decline what is given them. There’s no in between. To pretend that they have any capacity to decide this for themselves is a deflection from all the real issues. The real issues being that they (Meghan): 1) Want to cause a huge swirl of frenzy with masses of attention focused on them; 2) Give the middle finger to the royal family while pretending they aren’t; 3) Glut the internet and medial with hundreds of stories analyzing every inane part of their statement; 4) Get praised for their noble actions; 5) Be vilified.

      Referencing other royals who have full-time jobs and also serve the Queen is another deflection. Those royals are not senior royals. That’s the whole point. Historically, the path to converting from being a senior royal to a non-senior royal is abdication or renunciation. You don’t get to call the shots and decide, “I will live in the beautiful home, but I won’t visit the hospitals, and I will have bodyguards funded by taxpayers but I won’t follow the publicity protocols of the palace.” You also don’t get to decide, “I don’t want to be a senior royal so I will be a lesser royal.”

      Meghan is a relentless narcissist but I suspect she’s not that high on the intelligence scale. A smarter narcissist would be less obvious about relying on deflection and stirring up frenzy to try to get her way. But she can’t help herself. The immediate payoff is too great. So she continues to drop stink bombs that in the end don’t get her more than an immediate emotional payoff. Were she a smart narcissist, she could have really used the palace to her advantage, for many, many years to come.

      1. Exactly, what was the rush? All this I have tried and tried business. She’s been around for five minutes. There was no hurry to do this. Having scooped all the trappings of the marriage ceremony etc the within s few months – gone.

        1. Em: Narcissists do not hang around because they believe in platitudes like, Winners Never Quit, and Love will fix everything, and The Longer You Hang On, the Better It Will Be, and the likes. They cut their `losses.`

    2. PSE,
      “The more money we take from the public coffers, the more we can be controlled by the Monarchy and we (Meghan) want more freedom than that in our life”

      This is how I interpreted it too the first time I read it.

      1. Mercy: I was looking at Kate Middleton`s public duty schedule for January, the other day. It is robust. I would not want all that. Too stifling for me. I need more freedom than that.

        1. PSE, I don’t hear everything about the royal family in the US except the major headlines. I probably pay more attention now since HG and so many readers are from the UK. I just think Kate has really got it together. She exudes class in my opinion

    3. Did you read their website and read their demands, which are simply stated as facts? They intend to continue receiving all the money, homes, security, privilege, etc. everything, but they do not want to perform any duties or be accountable to anyone. And, on top of that, to earn their independent living, they plan to prostitute their royal name and status. Unbelievable.

      1. Brenda: Most people would like to have their cake and eat it too. Most negotiations encompasses both sides trying to obtain the best deal possible for themselves. I hear the Royal Family is a Firm, or something like that. Meghan may happen to be a good negotiator. I live in NYC and listen to all sort of negotiations for my daily breakfast. Why should she NOT negotiate with the Firm. They surely would love to get the most out of her. She is trying to get the most out of them as well. I see no problem with a worker negotiating with a Firm.

  12. I think there are some interesting comments here. Someone above posted the Queen may back down. She will not. She cannot.

    I think maybe the media is focussing on the ‘stepping down’ rather than the money. It’s always the money. Two reasons

    1 – The taxpayer will continue to fund the security for them

    2 – The merchandising. RF are NOT a brand because the Monarch is Head of State and the Church of England.

    Possibly a third, the refurbishment of Frogmore at the taxpayers expense.

    Either one of these could possibly just possibly have been overlooked. But not all three.

    This is A Consitunahl Crisayzzz

    When you have people who are dying due to Universal Credit. The horror show of Brexit and the election, and very possibly the breakup of the Union, these are putting the RF in a vice. They look more outdated and irrelevant than ever. Now add in Randy and Epstein. Charles is not popular. His ‘me first’ attitude to the succession is well known. Hes deluded and out of touch.

    Some reports are saying, did the Queen know in advance? Define ‘advance’? Possibly the same ten minutes the rest of them got.

    I called Sparkles pregnancy back in October. Now I’m very intrigued by this timing. IF she is pregnant then this would possibly be the end of the first trimester. Not yet showing but no time to dawdle. It also makes more sense of the six week holiday. Time to keep your head down until you are sure. And to plot.

    Of course CAN YOU IMAGINE the headlines if she has a miscarriage? Who will get blamed? The Queen. Queenie cannot be around forever. The outpouring at Diana’s funeral will appear like a kid crying at a party. If that happens, it probably wont dent her too much. But Charles? The throne will rock. That cannot be solved by a man who gets a lackey to hold a bottle whilst he urinated in it.

    A narc not bought up in the code has ran amock. I feel very very sorry for PH. He deserves far better. HG is right in that such a high profile MRer is extremely instrumental in getting the word out. But it also illustrates the trauma bond and empathy too.

    Excellent articles, HG.

    1. Renarde: I know that some say that the Queen may not know much about what is going on in her realm and even within her own family, but as we say in the United States, the Americans are good at gathering intelligence via technology, while the Brits are good at intelligence gathering intelligence from their embedded sources, using people. I forgot the name of it, but is when one uses people to gather intelligence, feet on the ground, so to speak. And, of course, the Brits are no slouches in obtaining intelligence by technology, as well. And she is sure to have many vetted sources for information, since she has been around so very long and is powerful, and she knows whom to ask about whatever. So, I believe that the Queen is underestimated a lot, by her populace, regarding what she does and what she does not know. And that underestimation often works in her favor. But, she is no regular grandma that just bakes cookies and marvels at how much her grandchildren have grown. I am quite sure she is a consummate strategist, and has been so since a very young age.

      1. PSE

        You could well be right but I’m just not sure.

        There was an infamous incident on one of their estates witnessed by a third party between HM and Philip.

        He became cross with her and told her to shut up it she could get out of the car.

        She fell quiet. Afterwards, the witness said, ‘Ma’am???’

        ‘Well, you heard what he said, he was going to leave me by the side of the road!’

        In other news which may or may not be entirely unrelated, I see Clivedon, Keeler and Ward have come up again in a BBC drama documentary. Hmm!!!

        1. Renarde: Well, HG does say that Magical Thinking goes on at times, and that their are Blind Spots at times, and mistakes can be made, at times, so I have to agree with you. I sort of forgot about all of that. Who really knows what they know and when they know it. Overall, The Queen knows a lot, and yes, Meghan could have blind-sided them in part, because of their Magical Thinking and Blind Spots. So, I do stand down, but just a little bit.

          1. PSE

            You raise interesting points via magical thinking.

            But of course she would’ve been fully vetted, followed, the works before marriage. Considering her nature, there are bound to be skeletons. Somewhere.

            I know what advice I would give PH if he became ‘woke’ tomorrow. But would he be ruthlessness enough to follow it? Hmm…

    2. Renarde: I just looked it up, and the phrase that I could not think of was: Human Intelligence. So like I was saying in the earlier post, regarding what the Queen does or does not know regarding the activities of her own family, in particular: the United States are known for their prowess in intelligence and information gathering utilizing technology, while the Brits are known for their prowess in intelligence and information gathering utilizing Human Intelligence, people. So, I doubt that there is much that the Queen is unaware of, regarding the ways and means of her own family members, including the Duchess, Meghan. She is informed, by her people, in one way or the other, whether or not she, the Queen, lets on, publicly, all the cards she is holding close to her crest.

      1. PSE

        You know, I posted that earlier and of course she must have known. I think it’s possible that there was a lot of communication vis all parties and Sparkles manipulated PH and seized the initiative. Very quickly.

        And I think for me its the timing, just the speed of it which is important.

        Surely, it would be been better for MINOR royals to have thrashed this out in private and come to an amicable arrangement?

        Good points though!

  13. I found it a tad frustrating today when people were giving their opinion or asking what I thought re MM and all I could do was smile sweetly and agree how they are a lovely couple and how brave she is making such a move.

    Ugh – who are these people I interact with?

      1. hahah I have backbone. But the people I interacted with today would not have ‘got it’ so it would have been completely pointless.

        1. Alexis I understand why you did it.
          There are a lot black women online who will go for my throat (they have already) if I disagree that Meghan is a victim of a “racist country” as she would have been informed of the terms and conditions before she married Harry and therefore she gave informed consent.
          I’m not saying racism no longer exists. But she was welcomed. They had a black priest at their wedding. If she was so controlled and oppressed why is she literally doing anything she wants without informing the family and without concern for others? Doesn’t make any sense.

          1. Witch—I don’t see a racial issue either. Holding a hammer doesn’t make everything a nail.

          2. Even if race was a pressing factor for people.. girl, why leave? You stay out of spite!!! and rub people’s faces in it like “Harry could have had an English, but he chose me and I can’t see your ugly broke bitch hate over all this money!” 😆
            As least that would be me if I was Meg

    1. alexissmith2016: Just send them here. Let HG do your arguing for you.
      The “Narc Bomb” article is just as apropos as the “Very Royal” series. Right on Kate’s b-day. Can’t accuse MM of subtlety, that’s for sure!

      1. Violetta, the people were either normals or mids today so it was pointless convo to have. I always make reference to articles which people would find helpful and/or interesting

        1. I understand, it’s important to get hits and increase readership. If there are no plans to write about Trump, So did Trump order the killing of Soleimani because he had been critised and wounded through the impeachment? And he did this, not because he heard they were planning imminent attacks on Americans simply because he needed to feel in control.

          1. Trump was unable to assert control over the prime protagonists re impeachment, thus he sought to assert control elsewhere and did so sanctioning the assassination. The response to that has brought with it control and fuel.

          2. What an absolute fucking moron he is!

            Thank you so much HG and for that you can take a large bite of my soul did your supper, I’ll even season it for you

  14. I feel so bad for the baby, already growing up within drama and conflict (that was me as a child)
    He’s so cute he looks like his mum with his daddy’s big ole head 😭 poor little ting. I’m praying for him

    1. I hope he has good nannies. He won’t be getting any real affection from her. I’ve been babysitting since Jr. High, and she doesn’t have a clue how to relate to him.

  15. Great article! I read on DM some comments piers morgan made about meghan and half wondered if he reads your work HG. He knew about meghans need to isolate harry etc. I know its been said piers is a narc but im not so sure.
    I initially thought harry to be a narcissist but now that its established hes an empath im curious to know which narc/s in his family influenced his addiction to narcissists? Not every empath is addicted to narcs but i think those with narc parents are moreso prone. So who with npd influenced harrys addiction to narcs? Prince charles? The queen? Someone was a major influencer in the way he gravitated toward someone so toxic as meghan. Having watched as an outsider harry and william grow up and the death of their mother its heartbreaking to see their family dissolve.
    There are so many factors and im sure quite a lot no one knows about. A lot of dysfunction, cover up, hidden secrets. Ive always thought the queen a matrinarc. She strikes me as very controlling and thatd align with her being a queen.
    Harrys always been overshadowed by william but what if he isnt charles son? Thatd be information thatd be hard to keep hidden and harry possibly has always been treated as not one of them behind the scenes. Maybe he is retaliating against the system and his family as well. It cant be easy growing up in the royal family for many reasons. I think his addiction to meghan could also be his need to break free and be rid of the toxicity involved with being a royal but hes jumped into a much worse situation!

    1. C-mum, HG has stated the queen is not a narcissist or an empath I am nearly certain. Charles is a narcissist. Di was not—although I find her BPD type behavior baffling and would like to see discussion on such behaviors and the correlation between an empath/narcissist deploying such maneuvers.

      1. Hi lorelei….id like also to see more written about princess di. I know she had anorexia and her self esteem seemed low not surprising what she endured in that marriage.

      2. Lorelei
        Very good!

        HG Tudor says:
        May 17, 2018 at 17:39
        But it is not about the entire monarchy. I commented the other day that Henry VIII was a narcissist. I have stated in the past that Prince Charles is a narcissist. Most kings and queens are (Queen Elizabeth II is not) and it is clear to see why that is.
So what if she is the first person who is non-white to be included in the royal family? The article has nothing to with that issue.

        https://narcsite.com/2018/05/17/a-very-royal-narcissist/comment-page-1/#comments

        Alexissmith2016 says:
        July 19, 2019 at 21:35
        Amazing analysis! Makes me feel really sad for Harry though.

        What sort of empath is the Queen?

        HG Tudor says:
        July 19, 2019 at 21:43
        She’s not an Empath.

        https://narcsite.com/2019/07/19/a-very-royal-narcissist-2-3/comment-page-1/

        1. Haha I remembered K! I do want to understand BPD better. I find the behaviors of self harm difficult at times and eating disorders as well. I understand the clinical jargon I use (for work) but how it does and does not relate to narcissism perplexes me a bit. I know there is a correlation between intent of course but to identify it is helpful. I used logic today walking by candy I like in the store. “You do not need a bottom the size of a house. Keep walking!”

          1. Lorelei
            Have you read Chained? Walk away from the candy; you don’t want to feed that addiction.

          2. I have not read Chained K. I want to. My agenda is nearly toppled over for about three weeks though. I imagine it will be a good read. Hilariously the (actually rather cute) pharmacist brought watermelon SPK’s for me tonight! He’s too young though. Damn!

          3. Uh I only ate one so my addiction is controlled. He insisted I eat just one since he bought them for me. I could love him maybe but I need a bracelet to seal the deal. It was thoughtful to buy me candy.

          4. Lorelei,

            Have you had SPK ice cream?! (It made me think of you.)
            I bought some for my son the other day and had a try – interesting taste sensations!

  16. The statement was cunning because, as usual, Meghan will get a “win win” no matter what happens next. Either the Queen is gentle and appeases them, more than not, and Meghan’s ego is stroked. Or, they eventually get booted from Frogmore and stripped of their titles, which enables Meghan to continue the victim role.

    Meghan has no insight that it is all a hollow, and silly, game. Nobody who matters in the royal circles or government give two hoots that she and Harry are downgrading their roles (the idea that they themselves have any power to decide to downgrade their roles is in itself laughable). In fact, all of this is probably an immense relief (despite the hurt at how it was done) to the Queen. She is no dumb bunny. She loves her grandson but she does not have to placate him. Any graciousness she shows them will be as a grandmother, not as a Queen. She can and will do splendidly without them, and Meghan unknowingly just gave the Queen a full deck, cards up, to choose from for her next moves.

    What the narcs of the world don’t realize (at least, the ones who are mooching off of/manipulating the power of others, because they have little direct power/status of their own) is that they get outplayed at every turn when they set themselves up against people who are deeply smart, well-adjusted, strong, calm, and centered. Narcs can set brush fires around such people but they can’t set a structural fire. That’s because the well-adjusted person’s world *does not revolve around the narc*, therefore the narc *cannot enter the structure of that person’s life* in order to set a fire. Narcs fundamentally misread that part of the equation. They set fires, and really, while they get some payoff (see first lines, above) they never really get the payoff they crave, that of setting the other person’s world upside down.

    This deep frustration is exactly *why* Meghan has escalated to this level (during the week of Kate’s birthday, as already mentioned). This royal pair absented themselves during the holidays and *they were not missed*. Therefore, it was time to escalate to bring the attention back to her/them. But they can escalate until Harry is stooped and Meghan’s hair is grey and she’ll never get the ultimate payoff from the Crown that she craves. Because nobody cares. If Meghan and Harry are going to be obnoxious, then they will not be missed. If they are not missed, there is little left that Meghan can do to pull strings in any significant way.

    Of course, the above does not apply to a narc who wields genuine power or authority (CEO of a company, for example). He or she can turn other people’s worlds upside down, even if those people are well-adjusted.

    1. SaraZ: regarding your statement: `Narcs fundamentally misread that part of the equation. They set fires, and really, while they get some payoff (see first lines, above) they never really get the payoff they crave, that of setting the other person’s world upside down.` SaraZ: most of us, in the thousands cumulatively, are here reading and visiting and conversing and learning on Narcsite, because a Narcissist turned our world upside down. And many of these Narcissists were not powerful in the world, nor CEOs. If we could all see the Narcissists of the other readers on here, that turned each of our lives upside down, I am sure it would be unbelievable to many of us, and in many ways. I would even wager, that shock would occur. lol. Underestimation, of also the emotional and interpersonal power, of a Narcissist, will not work in our favor overall.

      1. While I agree that underestimation of a narc can be dangerous, just like narcs themselves, I think it is different, or I HOPE so, because we – who read and comment here – we were the primary sources to the narcs and in this case it is Prince Harry and his life is upside down now. While HM is related to him, she still has her support network (she has not been isolated). And she is not an empath. I would not give in and give them what they want, because it seems like they want to keep the perks and titles and monetise on them. Somehow I do not think the Queen or Charles or William could let that happen.

        This whole situation so reminds me of my narcissist that I have managed to escape. I did escape because ultimately he did understimate me. At some point he escalated so badly, something like what Meghan did now with the announcement. I can only hope that with this the Royal Family will see what they are truly dealing with. That no matter how much they gave, it was not enought and ultimately – since unhappy with being senior royals – take away the titles and patronages and let them be independent. But maybe HM has better advisors who will help her with a better solution. I know I would be angry and would not give in into their demands.
        And I feel so sorry for PH and Archie and the whole family. This whole situation is being played out in public, while most families deal with it within 4 walls, so to speak.
        The Royal Family will go on. Some people did call out Maghan before on being a narcissist and I can only hope that eventually she will be seen as such by wider public. My wishful thinking (:

  17. What an amazing article HG.
    It goes to show you how Meghan the Narcissist wants to control and take advantage of Harry’s empathetic traits.
    I feel so bad for the Royal Family and the shocking news
    How can you step down from your duties when this is part of who you are growing up.
    This is what happens when Harry picked the wrong person to marry.
    What a shame

    1. The statistics says to the contrary. Posts about here generate many hits and comments. Also she commands extensive media coverage, therefore she is a high profile case study of narcissism which is very useful for making the cross over.

      1. Seems like the posts are mostly negative. She is receiving negative fuel, but fuel all the same—so she does have an effect. Not sure it’s relatable, though.

  18. I feel bad for PH. He has always been so kind and generous. I was hoping he had found happiness when he and Meghan got married.
    Most people in the US had no idea who she was until she hooked up with PH. She was never an A list celebrity, more like a D list.

      1. Good example in highlighting a female narcissist as well. We tend to focus on the males, so this is a good example of a female narcissist in action.

        1. I agree NA. And in the same vein, it is good to observe a male Empath…we know they exist because some show up here, but they don’t say much.

  19. And their statement has the audacity to say they will continue to collaborate with the queen. Like equals not like they work for the queen.
    Is this pre-empting trying to get themselves (Megan) on an equal footing with wills and Kate before they become king and queen? Is this a crazy attempt to undermine their position?

    1. It is about asserting control NOW. Trying to get on a level footing with William and Kate would be a future event and therefore is not the concern of Markle´s narcissism (moreover it is impossible to achieve, although admittedly that would not necessarily stop a narcissist trying, but it is not relevant to control now and that is what matters to Markle´s narcissism).

      1. Thanks HG. I understand. But there must have been forward planning to get to this point with regard to using The bomb to upstage Kate on her birthday. And they have been plotting this for some six months. Has there been thought fuel going on to satisfy the NOW. And if applying that premise of planning why not think they may be planning to get on an even footing in the future – as you say with charities being global not home grown etc. I’m not quite grasping the now element vs the planning.

  20. After reading this still in dismay as I find to see her behavior as narcissistic. When I heard a out of It sounded like a good idea, to re establish themselves on their life path by doing this.
    But after reading g HG’s article here if all makes sense fro. His perspective give.
    The fact that I still find it hard to believe is disappointing to me as I have following g HG and others for over 2 years. Why am I still ha I g a hard time seeing it? M.

    1. Credit it to you for realising what it is. It may be the case that you like MM or that you like PH and you do not want him to be in this situation and this is causing you to not want to accept the logic of what is written and thus you have a hard time accepting it. Instead, you are seeing it and therefore you should give yourself a pat on the back for doing so.

      1. This is interesting HG how some of us accept and see Ns (post knowledge) and others find it more tricky and difficult to accept.

        What is it within each of us that allows us to see/not see even after we have been shown the truth?

        Is it that those who do not see so readily have a stronger trait of wanting to see good in others? Or is it that those of us who do have a stronger truth seeking trait?

        1. Alex: E.T. is complex at times, yes? However, I dislike neither Meghan, nor Henry/Harry/H. Perhaps this fact makes it easier for me to look at both sides of the equation, a bit more comfortably. Nevertheless, I am able to see their flaws. Both of them have flaws. But, together, the 2 of them are like a spaceship in that all flaws and errors, combined with her narcissism, will exponentiate at a faster rate, and can be volatile and explosive at any given moment. And this latent volatility makes their situation so interesting to me.

          1. That’s interesting PSE. How do you find yourself able to not dislike MM knowing she is an N? I’m genuinely interested.
            As soon as I am told by HG or work out someone is an N (especially if they are female) I instantly dislike them, it is just so robustly innate in me. I can fake friendships with most of them (only as outercircle friends) but I could never not dislike them. Many of the guys (unless victim Ns) I can actually ‘like’ although still only enough to have them as an outercircle friend. I would never have any N as an inner circle friend now. Not ever.

          2. That is what happens through the reduction of your ET, Alexis2016. The dislike is the application of Logical Thinking and because you have lowered your ET, your LT governs your reaction.

          3. Of course. So simple. How do you make sense of all this so easily? I know what I think and how I feel and then you articulate it in two simple sentences. thank you.

            It seems LT is hijacking my ET now rather than the other way around

            Very, very helpful. Thank you so much

          4. Alexis:
            “As soon as I am told by HG or work out someone is an N (especially if they are female) I instantly dislike them”

            And yet you like HG.

          5. Alex: Just because someone is an empath does not mean that I will automatically like them, and just because someone is a Narcississt dos not mean that I will automatically dislike them. Even in court, sometimes the Judges say they actually like some of the people that they sentence to life in prison. Many people dislike Henry/Harry/H and like Meghan M, as well, although the media finds this fact boring or whatever, for now, at least. But, I do not dislike her. And, I do not dislike Henry. In fact, I like Henry more than Wills. And Meghan more than waity Katy. Kate has miraculously turned into a saint by the media. I remember when that was not the case. How short does the media expect my memory to be? hahaha. The media was harsh on Henry for the longest, until this marriage. There is no accounting for taste though, I heard it is said. So, according to my taste, I would much rather hang out, for example, with Henry and Meghan than with Wills and Katy, if I had to make a choice. Meghan is just trying to survive. She is a Narcississt. And I understand her as such. I find Wills and Katy more sneaky: Whether or not they are Narcissists.

  21. Now they’ve reviewed their media policy! They don’t like the misrepresentation- More control more attention more entitlement more triangulation more manipulation.

    1. Salami-slicing the news today, aren’t they; to make sure Kate receives no attention on her birthday.

      Also, who calls oneself “senior royals” in a statement like that? Only a narcissist would do that! I sincerely doubt the second-born of the Prince of Wales, the sixth (and counting) in line for the throne and his wife are actually considered “senior royals”.

      MeAgain and The Artist Formerly Known As Prince, that’s who they really are.

      1. I know and that is a big old ‘fuck you!’ To Kate. I like Kate. Have an affinity with her. Shes a Traveller.

        256 bare knuckle Rottweiler fights in Morrisons carpark. 256 wins.

  22. HG,

    Do you believe this situation shows that Harry may harbour some underlying resentment towards the royal family, perhaps due to the way his mother was treated by them, or due to how he was treated as a child?

    Not discussing their plans with the family before announcing them is disrespectful and also looks like a deliberate snub. I’d say it goes further than the result of being manipulated by your wife. It surprises me that Harry would agree to announcing it that way.

    1. Yes and it has been exploited by Markle´s narcissism. That is what we do, use your character, traits and personality to our own ends.

  23. Harry and Meghan’s announcement was made right after their six-week vacation together in Canada. It’s likely that Meghan spent those six weeks working on Harry intensely to manipulate him into thinking this was the right thing to do for them as a family.

    The more I think about it, the more I think the whole idea is half-baked and rash and it doesn’t make sense. Quite frankly, I would have thought Harry had better sense than to consent to it, whether he’s swimming in the emotional sea or not. He has been raised from birth as a major part of the royal family and now he’s decided to step back and change his home base without telling them or planning how it will all work? It’s not exactly like quitting your job as a part-time Uber driver or something like that. I think it’s bizarre and I think Harry is going to find that the fall-out of it all is going to be difficult.

    The more I see Meghan’s constant smiling expression and ‘glossy’ facade, the more irritating she is. Meanwhile, somebody really needs to lock Harry in a room and force him to listen to HG’s videos.

    1. WiserNow, I was thinking Harry had better sense than that too. He had to know the consequences of making the announcement without consulting anyone. I couldn’t believe he didn’t have the decency to tell the queen at least. The control must be strong because as an empath, I couldn’t see doing something so disrespectful. I didn’t know about the announcement until I heard it here (HG news is always more interesting than world news haha). Now I’ve been looking into it more, and it looks like the media is getting most the blame. How ironic that this rash announcement triggered a frenzy of media coverage. Or is it ironic? Just another rush of fuel for MM

      1. Mercy,
        Yes, it seems out of character for Harry because he had matured a lot in recent years. I thought he had more respect for royal protocols etc. Perhaps his new role as a husband and father has changed his sense of loyalties? Or it’s the emotional thinking at work and he doesn’t want to rock the boat by creating a conflict with Meghan.

        Whatever it is, it’s playing right into Meghan’s hands. The fuel must be flowing with all the worldwide media attention. Now she’s flown off to Canada again leaving Harry alone to deal with his family and the media. By doing that, she has escaped accountability and close scrutiny and left Harry alone to deal with the immediate aftermath. She has no empathy for her new husband.

        She is unconvincing when speaking publicly to the media etc, but maybe we can see that because of HG’s influence. She probably has Harry wrapped around her little finger so tightly, his ET is strong and he believes it will be in the best interests of his new family life with her. Whatever the case, I feel for him. It’s a car crash and he’s in the middle of it yet seems to be the most unaware.

    2. Wiser, I was also wondering about that, then I realised that Harry is in devaluation. His emotional state will affect his judgement and emotional thinking will hijack his empathic traits ie love devotee as far as MM is concerned, and perhaps justice as far as not consulting his family is concerned . Who knows how tightly Megan is holding his string in an emotional sense. He may have had it communicated to him that he risks losing her if he doesn’t comply. This can be done in subtle ways. The devaluation is emotional abuse. I sometimes forget that myself but it is a big factor. Harry would have already been subjected to gas-lighting, blame-shifting, belittling etc in a very personal way that undermines his stability. I think we sometimes forget, because of his high profile and the fact the is a male empath, that as IPPS he is currently being treated to active devaluation.

      1. AnneB,
        My point was that he is part of the royal family and very aware of his position. Ignoring the Queen or the family in general before making the announcement is unusual, whether or not he’s in active devaluation.

        For example, say you were planning to resign from a full-time job. The standard expected procedure to follow would be to first hand in your resignation and give notice to the person you report to. You wouldn’t simply announce it to everyone in general. The standard procedure (or protocol) to follow in cases like that would not normally be affected by whether or not you were being devalued in your personal relationship.

        I haven’t forgotten that he’s in active devaluation. That’s why I said his ET is probably strong and he’s motivated to maintain the positive aspects of their relationship and not cause any conflicts with her.

        He could have complied with Meghan’s wish to ‘step back’ etc and still consult with the palace prior to announcing their plans, especially due to his position and the fact it’s his close family.

        1. Wiser, We can’t know, but as it is so unusual that he didn’t consult I was wondering if the very nature of the devaluation has warped his judgement to this extent. The analogy with resigning from a full time job fits in one sense, however this full-time job is also Harry’s immediate family and it is suggested that MMs manipulations would include exploiting Harry’s sore spots, unresolved issues etc – divide and conquer. Perhaps Harry, well I think it is very, very likely that he is unable to see clearly and be logical and logic is what he would need to override his ET and consult with his family in accordance with both protocol and family expectation.

          1. AnneB,

            Yes, we are all speculating here. I agree that Meghan is exploiting Harry’s vulnerabilities, which probably include any underlying resentments he has towards his family. All families have some kind of resentments like that if you dig deep enough. A narcissist deliberately seeks them out and uses them for his/her benefit.

            What HG mentioned in his article about Harry being torn between doing what Meghan wants and consulting with his family is probably the case. I still find it unusual that he would disregard his family in such a dramatic way.

            It’s typical of narcissists though. They don’t care about the damage they do to existing relationships and connections within a family in the long run. Meghan cared about dropping the bombshell because it suited her aims. Harry is now left with the longer term fall-out because the family will hold him accountable for his behaviour in the process.

  24. Dear Mr Tudor,
    So, when it turns sour, does Harry come back home with little Archie ?
    Beatrice, Eugenie, William n Harry all remained within the compounds
    This is going to be huge
    Luv Bubbles xx 😘

  25. HG – fabulous part 7. Answers many of my questions.
    So so interesting. Only having been embroiled with narcs and saved from them is it now easy to read and understand and observe.
    Thank you.
    The financials and the security and the barefaced assumption that she’s entitled and that she’s better than the royal family and establishment that welcomed her. ‘Do it my way’. And all announced on the eve of Kate’s birthday – calculated. Spot light stealing. Jealousy.
    I’m jumping ahead but when this is all over for her, and hardy limps back into the fold (maybe) what will happen to her? It would be so difficult to find a way back now.
    What will be her down fall and how will it end? Will she be bitter and broke or just bitter. Will she be uncovered?

    1. I do not see her ending up broke. She can always play the Royal card to be ” a nice little earner”.
      Bitter, not so much, but rather she will whine about the way she has been treated and regard it as unfair.

  26. I just saw this on the news this morning (how did I see no news yesterday). I instantly thought of HG!
    The Brits must be reeling at this news, and it’s just stupid, I mean “why”….allegedly because they want to earn their own money? Wtf! I presume that means Meghan wants another tv role. That may not be as easy as she thinks. A lot of hoopla comes with Hiring her now.

    1. Perhaps she tinks she will make millions merching herself and doesn’t seem to understand that people don’t care about her, but rather her connection to the RF. Once that’s gone, so is her clout.

  27. I must admit I wasn’t following this too close because I have absolutely no interest in this couple; that aside, you are amazingly accurate and like Alexis commented yesterday, “better than Nostradamus.” When I heard the news yesterday, all I could think of was “HG knew first.” Whoa, impressive.

  28. Amazingly wise and logical, HG. As usual.

    Coincidence or narcissistic will, MeAgain’s announcement was issued… on the eve of Kate Middleton’s birthday, overshadowing any slightest mention of it in the media.

    1. The instinctive narcissism at play. Kate´s birthday is a threat to control, therefore the narcissism ensures the announcement is made prior to it, thus overshadowing the birthday and continuing to assert control.

        1. By default, not necessarily at MM. It’s like one of these dolls that closes her eyelids whatever way you hold her.

      1. I have referred readers on multiple news sites to Narcsite.com, specifically to “Dropping the Narc Bomb” and of course the “Very Royal Narcissist” series. What other specific articles would be appropriate to this situation and help new visitors to this site get a handle on the dynamic quickly?

        1. Thank you for doing so. At the current time, the two you mention are suitable. It is better to coax the interest than bombard with a raft of articles. Let them make the link between Markle and Narcissist and then they can read more here once they come here, to understand more about the topic and then begin to see parallels with people they actually know.

    1. Eh, you just want to see what he looks like, MB.

      HG, you’ll have to be in shadow or pixilated if you want to maintain your Secret Identity. OTOH, I’m sure most people would rather look at you than at Piers.

      1. I know you meant it as a compliment, but being described as better looking than Piers Morgan is not really a high standard is it?!

        1. Not complimenting you, HG (you are hardly in need): I am compimenting the taste of the public. PT Barnum said the public’s intelligence couldn’t be underestimated, but in this case, I think the public might show some discernment.

  29. He is no longer Prince Harry. He is “Megan Markle’s husband” now. I think during his devaluation she tries to destroy his royal status not only because she doesn’t like royals but also because it is his advantage in this relationship. It’s hard to devalue partner if the partner is objectively superior – he is of higher status than you. She must devalue that social status. And of course in America she will be the star, he will be inferior. Sad he can’t see this.

      1. hahaha cogra002, that made me laugh. Poor Harry. Empaths really do need to learn the hard way, don’t they?

    1. Hi gab…thats a great point about her need to destroy his royal status bc thats what happens with narcissists they aim to destroy that which they envy. She wants to consume what he is but at the same time destroy it bc she knows itll never really be hers or who she is. Narcs inner conscience is very much always there. They know theyre empty and instead of fixing their disorder they let it drive them to further destruction.

      1. Chi-mum,
        You make a good point there. The narcissist’s inner envy and need for control keeps churning away, no matter how good their achievements get. In turn, that causes their own downfall. They don’t know or can’t recognise when to stop so that their ‘achievements’ will satisfy them.

        To an outsider, Meghan now has a caring and attentive husband, a beautiful healthy baby boy, a privileged lifestyle where she wants for nothing materially, she can jetset to any place in the world she fancies, and she is literally treated like royalty. She is royalty. But it’s still not enough. She will jeopardise all of that for fuel and control and she can’t see that she’s actually shooting herself in the foot.

        That’s what is sometimes so puzzling about this disorder. It’s a ‘defence strategy’ and it serves to maintain the narc’s survival, however, there is no internal ‘brake’ that enables them to see that they are surviving pretty damn well and don’t need to keep cranking out the defence strategy anymore.

    2. Excellent insight re: what attracted her to him largely I’m sure was his status and how amazing she would look being in that position- a Royal! But now she’s tearing it down. I couldn’t believe it when I saw that news yesterday! Primarily I couldn’t believe how soon this is all happening! How long have they been married? Not even two years? She’s a real vixen.
      I hope someone in the royal family will see HG’s analysis…Or the newspapers over there will print some snippets.
      Looking on Twitter so many of the comments about it are in their favor Which is so disappointing. So many of the comments are like something you would get from Typical flying monkeys.
      Lessons learned from HGs “no good advices” essay are in order. They want to protect the female with her baby…They can’t imagine a woman .. a mother..could be so cunning and manipulative. They think how would a woman want to reject that life ..they must be awful to her.
      Ugh.

    3. In America Markle is a nobody. Just another spoiled actress. I think the majority of people here view Harry’s royal title as superior.

      1. Mercy,
        I agree. People in the USA are still fond of Princess Diana, and have a soft spot for her offspring. MM is a Briefcase Girl from Deal or No Deal.

    4. She won’t be a star long here: look at Fergie.

      Her H’wood friends will dump her when she no longer has that Palace “in.” Some have already distanced themselves.

      She thought she could be Diana. She forgot or didn’t notice that Diana was born into an aristocratic family whose lineage goes back farther than the Windsors’. Grace Kelly and Wallis Simpson came from Philly and Maryland society, respectively (although Wallis’ family had come down in the world financially, at least). They moved naturally in those circles. So she doesn’t have the society family thing going for her.

      She doesn’t have the style thing going for her, as Diana, Wallis, and Grace had–see my “fashion salad” post elsewhere on this site.

      She’s too arrogant to play the Cinderella routine, although that hasn’t stopped her from trying.

      She doesn’t have the talent of Grace Kelly or Rita Hayworth, both of whom were Hollywood royalty before they ever acquired titled husbands.

      She doesn’t have the natural dignity of Princess Angela of Lichtenstein, who seems to have settled in quite well. Someone who had that natural dignity but never got the official title was Audrey Hepburn.

      She wasn’t savvy enough to milk her common qualities the way Nell Gwynn or Mary Ann Clarke did, both of whom played the cheeky wench with style and wit. (Judge to Mary Ann: “Did his Highness become your protector?” Mary Ann: “Some protector ‘e turned out to be!”)

      She will fade. As HG has pointed out, some narcs go in for short-term fuel, never thinking ahead to all the long-term fuel they could have if they could just sit tight for a little.

    5. Gab, Good point! From Prince to MM’s husband. In Canada he will be experienced as an extension to her in name as well. His innate title offends her superiority. The higher status must be hers.

  30. HG,

    I read this after posting to part 6.
    It just makes me sad that the decisions Harry now (likely) feels like are a good idea for his family are leading him down the garden path.

    Your accurate insights into this relationship are chilling and disturbing for me.

    1. WhoCares: HG`s `accurate insights into this relationship are chilling and disturbing` to me as well. So, you are not alone. But, I am, in general, surrounded by so much hot ignorance by the media, most of the time, these days, that I am enjoying the cool breeze of HG Tudor`s wisdom.

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